From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org Date: Mon, 3 Jul 2000 13:32:40 -0500 Subject: All She Needs by Starbuck_Jayne Source: direct Reply To: Starbuck_Jayne@mulderandscully.co.uk All She Needs By Starbuck_Jayne Starbuck_Jayne@mulderandscully.co.uk Rating: PG I think! I can't think of anything too bad... Spoilers: Requiem, but beware! I may have unconsciously slipped anything from seasons 1-7 in there somewhere! Keywords: Scully angst, MSR Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story. Except James Matthews. They belong to CC, 1013 and the rest of the gang yadi yadi yada...Oh and I used them without permission. Please don't sue me I'm just a child!!!! Archive: If you really think it's worth it then anywhere! But please keep my name and e-mail attached! And it would be nice if u let me know where :) Summary: What exactly will happen in season 8? (Something to keep us going through the summer!) Author's Notes: Yes this fanfic was inspired by the beautiful song by Lene Marlin "One Year Ago", but you will find no lyrics etc in the story! I also borrowed that without permission! Sorrrrrrrryyyyyy!!! Ok well this is my first piece of fanfic that I am posting so do lemme know if I am making a really big mistake! Send me flames if u want but I assure u they will be sent right back! Constructive criticism is allowed! It is a big understatement to say I LOVE FEEDBACK!!!! Please please please send it me! This story is also dedicated to my best shipper friend in the whole wide world!! Hey Jill! And of course Pippa and Allison and Lily and Kelly and Liz and every1 else who has unwillingly read my fanfic on so many occasions! Ok so on with the show! All She Needs Starbuck_Jayne@mulderandscully.co.uk The faint hum of electrical lighting was all that penetrated the still humidity of the basement office. Computers lay dormant amidst piles of unfinished cases, their lazy orange stand by lights confirming their inactivity. An abandoned mug contained the curdled remains of a coffee, beside which lay a sandwich, apparently a sufferer of the same neglect. The owner of the items slept, her red hair masking the tear stained cheeks that lay beneath. It was 4am and Dana Scully had been awake for 3 days solid. As soon as she had been released from the hospital she had headed straight for the office, intent on searching through the thousands of X-Files in the frailest of hopes that she would uncover a clue. A clue that could possibly be the means to the only chance she had of finding her partner. Her search was fruitless-it's only result had been grief as the slow realisation had dawned on her...Mulder was gone. These files served merely as painful reminders of the times they had shared together, and the open draws of the grey cabinets taunted and towered about her; penning her in and choking her with the guilty knowledge that it was she that was supposed to be taken, not him. She was a doctor-she knew she was making herself ill, and she had the baby to think about now as well! Only, all she could think about was Mulder. It was the awkward cough of her superior that awoke Scully the next morning. AD Skinner was hovering beside her, seemingly unsure as to whether or not it would be wise to gently shake the sleeping agent. He looked relieved when she stirred, solving his dilemma. However, the concern soon flooded back to his eyes, softening the hardness that had become imprinted on them by many years of denying himself any emotion. Scully look exhausted, with her hair matted about her cheeks, and her eyes heavy from lack of sleep. "Agent Scully..." Skinner began. "Sir..." Scully knew what was coming and was ready to protest. She couldn't be sent home! She had to work! Where would sitting at home with her feet up get her? "Agent Scully, I demand that you cease your business here immediately!" Skinner pounced before she had time to continue. "I cannot have you working for 72 hours straight when you have just been released from hospital! Go home and rest, Scully..." "But Sir you don't understand!" "That is an order!" he snapped, his intentions firm, not cruel. "Sir I am not leaving here until I find information on where they have taken Agent Mulder!" "Agent Scully, if you do not go home immediately you will be relieved of your position and denied all access to the resources here!" Upon glimpsing Scully's expression of sheer despair his tone softened. "Listen, Dana, go home and get some sleep. That's all I ask. You're not going to get anywhere in this state! And you have other responsibilities to consider now..." he conveyed his meaning with a quick glance to her stomach. "I will try and dig up as much information as I can," he promised. It was probably lack of sleep and proper nourishment that weakened Scully's resolve, and resulted in her unwillingly taking her coat from the stand with a sigh, before proceeding to lock up the office. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX She slept soundly. A three-day stint of continual work combined with the incessive strain of morning sickness tended to have that effect on even the strongest. Yet, even in the very depths of sleep, Scully's mind continued to be centred on her partner. Visions of the forest in Oregon provided the perfect setting for a dream in which Scully was forced to watch over and over again Mulder's abduction. Despite the fact she had not actually witnessed the event first hand, the dream was so vivid she could almost feel the bite of the night air as it whipped about her. She could see as if it were real the beam of the craft as it drew its victims near before the flash became too bright for her to watch anymore. It was at this point she would awaken, beads of cold sweat forming at her temples before sliding down her cheeks and combining with the tears of helplessness she cursed herself for shedding. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Monday morning had come around sooner than Scully had expected. She felt much stronger, and confident that she could go into work able to plough through the necessary paperwork without an emotional breakdown. She was reminded then of the penalty she had served in order to gain this renewed strength of character-she had neglected Mulder. Scully found the office exactly as she had left it, and scolded herself for allowing the glimmer of hope inside herself to suggest Mulder had returned and was sitting in his chair, reading an X-File or making them both a cup of coffee. She laid her briefcase on the desk and busied herself with making a hot drink, clicking the "messages" button on the office phone before she began. "Agent Scully, I wish to speak with you in my office as soon as you arrive. Thank you," Skinner's recorded voice informed her. Scully's stomach lurched. What could he want to see her about so soon in the morning? What if he wanted to close down the X-Files? She drew a deep breath and left the office. "Sir?" Skinner's secretary spoke into her intercom, "Agent Scully is here." "Thank you, Kimberly, send her in," the AD instructed. Scully moved cautiously to the door and pushed it open. She could see Skinner at his desk, leafing through some documents and talking incoherently to someone Scully could not see. Skinner looked up when he heard the door creak open. He greeted the agent and ushered her to a chair in front of him. She sat down next to a man who was dressed in a smart blue suit, an FBI ID hanging from the top pocket of his jacket. "Agent Scully, I would like you to meet Agent James Matthews...your new partner." Scully's expression soured at his words, but she courteously took the young man's hand, extended in greeting. "Pleased to meet you, Agent Scully. I have heard a lot about your work!" He was fresh- faced and eager to make a good impression, not only on her but on Skinner as well. Scully suspected he was only just out of the academy. "Now, you have both been permitted, for the time being, to resume work on the X-Files. Agent Matthews, your work with Agent Scully begins immediately. If there are any problems then you know where to find me. Good day agents," he dismissed the pair with a wave of his hand after entrusting Scully with a cardboard folder containing the documents he had been studying before she had entered. The pair got up to go, Matthews leaving first. When she reached the door Scully slammed it shut, thus leaving herself and Skinner inside the office alone. She spun on her heel to face the AD. "What is the meaning of this?" she demanded, eyes blazing red with fury. "Agent Scully..." "I don't need a new partner!" she hissed, "have you given up on Mulder already?!" A sudden realisation struck her, "how much about his disappearance do you actually know, sir?" "Agent, you need to calm down! Outbursts like this are what are going to get you suspended! You know the Bureau's policy! You are required to have a partner to aid in your investigations." "I am aware of that, Sir, but you know as well as I do that the material the X-Files covers is hardly regulation fieldwork!" "Agent Scully, I cannot make you the exception to the rule and leave you to manage the X-Files by yourself and you know it! If you still feel unable to cope then I strongly suggest you take more time off." "Sir, I have to work! I have to find Mulder!" Scully's eyes pleaded with him- begging him to understand. Skinner sighed. "Scully, we're going to find Mulder. I promise you. But you have to think about yourself and how much more pressure you can put yourself under. I have assigned you a new partner in the hope he can ease some of the workload..." "I am able to cope perfectly well on my own thank you," Scully's tone oozed with all the sweetness of lemon juice. She turned to leave, arguing wasn't going to get her anywhere; but Skinner's hand caught her wrist, stopping her. "Scully, go easy on Matthews. It isn't his fault." Scully shook her arm free and headed back to the basement office. "Sheesh! Look at this place!" Agent Matthews said as she entered the room. He was standing by Mulder's poster, which proudly declared that he "Wanted to believe". Scully had always laughed at that poster, but she suddenly felt very protective of it. Who was Matthews to start coming in here and insulting her partner and his beliefs? "Agent Matthews, we might have to begin by laying down a few ground rules. First of all, nothing in this room is to be removed, destroyed or changed in any way. This is Mulder's office and neither of us have any business meddling with what he has worked so hard to achieve. The X-Files were his life, and that is the way it is going to stay." Scully noticed the panic flash through Matthew's cool gaze. She imagined he would be cursing whoever he had managed to piss off in order to be assigned to The Ice Maiden. No doubt she and Mulder were the talk of the academy, just as Mulder had been when she herself was in training. The reputation of Mr. and Mrs. Spooky was probably still holding strong. "I'm, I'm sorry, Dana. I didn't know." He stammered. Scully suddenly felt sorry for him. Skinner was right-it wasn't Matthew's fault that he happened to be her new partner. She had just felt cheated. That Skinner was giving up on Mulder too quickly, and after he had promised her so faithfully that he would help her to find him. The incident in his office this morning. The whole affair must have lasted a matter of minutes! Everything was happening so quickly...time was just slipping further and further away from her. Her hopes of finding Mulder were fading by the second. "So, umm, what's in the file? Is it a new case?" Matthews ventured onto neutral territory. Scully looked down at the forgotten wallet in her hand. "I don't know," she said as she opened it. Photographic images of the corpse of what appeared to be a young woman spilled out onto the desk, causing Agent Matthews to wince and turn away in disgust. "Weak stomach, Matthews?" Scully chided her new partner. "Well, it looks as if we're headed for Massachusetts first thing in the morning." "What? But wait! Dana, how is this...I mean I thought we were...umm, how is this an X- File?" "An X-File Agent Matthews? I have to warn you I'm not a firm believer in the paranormal, so in my opinion there is nothing at all that says this case is an X- File..." Matthews looked puzzled. "But if my partner was here," Scully continued, "he would probably have some theory about witchcraft." XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX The days passed by, slowly forming weeks, which drifted into months. Scully and Matthews continued their work together on the X-Files, the review panel seemingly finding no real reason for their closure. The Agents got on well enough to have a good business relationship, but outside of work, they never even spoke if they passed in the street. There were no late night telephone calls, Scully received no card on her birthday and she had in her possession no key to her partner's apartment. Heck she didn't even know where he lived! In truth, she missed Mulder more than she ever thought possible. She missed him more than she had her father, or even her sister after her death, and the worst part of all was knowing what she did not know...if he was even dead or alive. She had searched through endless case files, some dating back as far as J Edgar Hoover himself! But to no avail. There was nothing that hinted what might have happened to him, or even suggested where he might be. She had travelled up and down the country in search of disused boxcars but found nothing but memories of times passed. Agent Matthews insisted on playing everything by the book and refused to accompany her on unofficial investigations. Skinner did very little in comparison to all he had promised and in short, Scully was alone. Despite her promises to herself she would go home at night and just lay down on her sofa and cry. She cried for the baby and she cried for Mulder. Her mother did all she could-made sure she had her weekly check ups and went to all the scans, for she would have forgotten otherwise! It wasn't that the baby was not important to her-far from it! It was just that, after all, she needed a father for the child. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX She was running again. Racing through the forest, screaming his name. Tears flowed down her cheeks as she fell, tripping over a dead branch. She thrust out her arms, begging him to turn around; awake from the trance the bright magnetic light had him trapped in. "Mulder!" she screamed from the forest floor, "Mulder!" The beam held her partner in its cruel glare, causing her to shield her eyes, look away. Then, in a sudden flash of light, he was gone. She was alone again amongst the blackened trees. "Dana?" She spun round upon hearing her name. "Dana! Wake up!" Scully lifted her head, allowing her eyes a few moments to adjust to the rush of artificial light. "Dana, are you ok?" Her partner asked. "Yeah, I'm...I'm fine." She checked her watch. How long had she been asleep? "Umm, actually, James, is it ok if I just take a quick break? I could do with a few minutes to, umm, to clear my head." She rose, taking her coat from the stand by the door. Her partner stared after her, concerned. The baby was due in less than a fortnight- she shouldn't still be at work. Scully's quick footsteps brought her to the reflecting pool. She found the place deserted-the biting March winds no doubt kept other agents within the warmth of the Hoover Building. Sitting down on the bench, she fought back tearful memories. She couldn't bear to think about him, and yet here she was, sitting on their bench. Drawing a deep breath, Scully forced her attention to the baby. She hadn't even thought of a name yet! Bill? Charlie? Fox? But what if it was a girl? It was hard to explain, especially for her, but somehow she felt sure that the baby was a boy. Resting her head in her hands Scully allowed herself a few tears. She was so frightened, so afraid...and so very alone. "Do you mind if I sit here?" A voice asked. Scully snapped back into professionality so quickly that she failed to recognise the familiarity in the tone... XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Well??? What do you think?? One very impatient girl VERY eager for comments or criticism!! U know the address! Shippers 4eva!