From: Snark Date: Tue, 30 Nov 1999 15:30:46 -0800 (PST) Subject: xfc: NEW: "Always" by Snark. Post-Millenium fic. Rated PG. Vignette, MSR. Source: xfc From: Snark TITLE: Always AUTHOR: Snark E-MAIL: snark_911@yahoo.com DATE COMPLETED: November 30, 1999 /-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/ SUMMARY: Mulder realizes the new millenium isn't the only thing beginning this night. SPOILERS: Additional perspective on the ending of the Millenium episode. If you haven't seen it, you probably don't want to bother reading any further until you have. CLASSIFICATION: Vignette, Mulder POV. Some slight angst, implied MSR. RATING: PG /-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/ AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is a bit of fluff that's just floatin' off my fingers as I bask in the glow of those final sixty seconds. I know that everyone is writing stories on this one, but I figured, what the hell--what's one more? :-) I should also mention this is my first attempt at a first person point of view, which also means it's my first foray into the present tense. I normally prefer the 'all-seeing' distant eye of third person, but felt that a more intimate feel was required for this piece. Oh, and I should also mention that the grammar patterns of the Jade character are *intentionally* incorrect. /-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/ DISTRIBUTION: OK to forward to ATXC newsgroup, to Gossamer and to Xemplary. Please ask permission before archiving anywhere else. If you already have one of my stories, permission is granted, but still let me know you are grabbing this one as well. DISCLAIMER: No money for me! No sue for you! FEEDBACK: Mail comments to snark_911@yahoo.com. HOMEPAGE: http://members.tripod.com/~koosn/index.html /-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/- "So... a bunch of dead guys was chasing you?" "Yup." *wrap* "And you had to shoot 'em in the head?" "Yup." *tape* "To prevent the end of the world from comin' upon us?" "Yeah-huh." *sling* Pause. "Boy, are you *sure* you didn't get whacked upside the skull?" For the first time in several hours, I feel laughter well up in my throat. Jade, the nurse bandaging and slinging my arm, has been chatting to me for the past ten minutes about my run-in with... well, with dead guys trying to bring the end of the world upon us. Like all emergency room night nurses, Jade is a combination of both relaxation and speed--an outwardly laid-back man with hands nearly quicker than the eyes can follow, the rhythm of his soft drawl distracting his patients from whatever pain they might be experiencing. Of course, after almost becoming a sacrifice to a real-life recreation of Night of the Living Dead, the dull throbbing in my arm seems a very minor thing indeed. "Nah, I'm pretty sure I'm in my right mind, Jade," I say, nodding to him as he asks if I can still feel his slight touch against my palm. The doctors had initially been worried about my arm, fearing an especially deep cut may have caused some nerve damage. But Jade seems satisfied I am all right, making a note on my chart before delivering it to a doctor across the room. "Oh, I'm not so sure about that, Mulder," a voice says from behind me. A voice accompanied by a very distinct set of footfalls. "Are you insinuating that I'm at something less than peak form, Agent Scully?" I ask, doing my best to look and sound indignant as Scully steps around in front of me. Within the space of seconds, she has given me a thorough once-over, ending with a quick brush of her fingers across my scalp, ostensibly looking for a head wound. "I would never insinuate such a thing, Agent Mulder," Scully says, dropping her hand to her side as Jade comes near. Her eyebrow quirks a bit... "I'd just come out and say it." I laugh again, rolling my eyes up towards the ceiling as I move to slip down from the exam table. A strong set of hands moves to intercept my motion. "Hold it right there, Mr. Apocalypse man," Jade says, holding me in place with both a strong arm and a steely gaze. "Now while I think you still be a little flaked, the doctors have seen fit to release you. And while you probably ain't feeling no pain at the moment, that shot's gonna wear off in a couple hours. So promise me you gonna head straight home, leaving all the dead people chasin' for another day." "Sir, if you figure out a way to extract that promise from him, I'm going to be mightily impressed," Scully says, laughing as I get another chance to practice my indignant look. "I have my ways, ma'am, but I try to avoid sharing trade secrets," Jade says as he chuckles a bit. "I also try to avoid wastin' my time, so I suppose I'll just settle for a promise to *try* to leave all the dead people chasin' for another day." "Now that, I can do," I say, nodding solemnly at Jade as he lets me go. "Mulder, I've got to go talk to Frank for a minute--I'll see you out in the hall when you're through," Scully says, pausing to get my confirming nod before heading for the door. "She out there chasin' the dead people with you, Mr. Apocalypse?" Jade inquires as he holds out a small package of extra bandages. I nod as I take them from him, tucking them into the sling to free up my hands. "Yeah, she wasn't with me at first, but arrived just in time for all the fun," I say as I stretch my good arm a bit. Jade glances out the door through which Scully just disappeared, turning back to me after a few moments. "Oh, I'm pretty sure she be with you the whole time," he says, giving me a sly wink as he turns and walks away. Leaning back up against the exam table, I chuckle a bit as I realize the truth of his words. Scully *is* always with me, seems like. I can feel her even when we're two thousand miles apart--she's always there with me, coursing like an electrical current just beneath my skin. It was an odd sensation a few weeks ago, when the thousand voices in my head were finally stilled. A single presence remained in the ensuing silence, one which had always been there, even though I'd rarely recognized it. A presence which gives me a strength I've never known before. Boy, you've got to learn to have these realizations prompted by something *other* than near-death situations, I say to myself as I laugh. One of these days, it isn't going to be a 'near' attached to 'death,' and then where will you be? Doing a couple of quick knee bends to un-kink my legs, I give a final wave in Jade's direction as I head for the door. "Hey, man, Happy New Year," Jade calls out to me, the smile on his face echoing through to his voice. "Enjoy the new millenium." "You too, Jade. Thanks," I reply, swinging out through the double doors into the hallway beyond. I glance at a sign on the wall, trying to figure out which way Scully might have gone. Before I can give it much thought, though, a small girl's cry of "Daddy!" beckons me in the right direction. Leisurely making my way towards the sound, I realize how hard it must have been for Frank to make the decision to help us, to risk the welfare of his daughter. After all he'd been through, after all his daughter had been through, the temptation to just walk away must have been overwhelming. And as I swing around the corner, I am struck with the realization of how hard it is for Scully to watch the happy reunion between Frank and Jordan, between a parent and child. Even as she tips a smile in my direction to indicate she's seen me, she can't quite hide the sorrow in her eyes. Emily. Even though it's been two years, she is still with us every day. Sometimes, when Scully isn't aware I'm watching, I catch glimpses of her face as we pass young mothers on the street. A thousand emotions are present on her face--longing, regret, frustration, sorrow, anger, hopelessness... and joy. That's the one which always pulls hardest at my heart. That even though she herself will forever be denied the chance for motherhood, even though her Emily was lost before she'd ever been found, Scully can still find joy in watching a mother and her child. She is so much stronger than I could ever be. I reach her side as Frank and Jordan stand, linking hands to walk over to us. I stick out my good hand to shake his, wishing him the best of luck in his future. I smile down at Jordan to let her know the same goes for her. She grins back up at me, even though she doesn't really understand who I am or what her father has just done for the world. And she doesn't have to--all she knows is that she's with her daddy again, and that's enough for her. I am broken from my momentary reverie by Frank answering a question from Scully, saying that he and Jordan just want to go home now. "Take care of yourselves," he says to us, taking a final glance at the TV above us before steering his daughter off down the hall. Scully and I watch them leave, finally turning to glance up at the monitor above. The traditional Times Square footage rolls, the ever-present voice of America's oldest teenager floating past us as we watch. Dick Clark--now there's an X-File for you... *hug your friends and loved ones tight... heck, whoever that person is next to you. No time like the present...* Friends and loved ones. I wonder who is even left in my life that fills those roles anymore. The boys are my only regular friends I suppose--my personality has always made it difficult to form and hold on to lasting friendships. As for loved ones... my sister is gone, my father is gone, my mother and I have never been all that close. Friends and loved ones. For most people, those are two separate sets of individuals in their lives. They have their friends, and they have their loved ones. But I realize I'm one of the lucky people who has someone who fills both those roles. Someone who happens to be standing right next to me. *happy new year, 2000* Twisting my body slightly, I turn to watch Scully. She's smiling up at monitor, watching the throngs of happy revelers laughing and hugging in the streets of New York. People without a care in the world, people who have no idea how close they came tonight to the end of that world. Sometimes, I wish I could be one of them. Maybe, just this once, I can be. As if she can feel my gaze, Scully turns to look at me. Without conscious thought, really, I lean down to her, pressing a gentle kiss to her lips as I close my eyes. I wonder if she closes hers as well... There is no fervor of hormones in this kiss, no groping of hands or battles of tongues. There is only a gentle passion, a sweetness born of romance, of friendship and of love as our lips linger together. It's about the best damn kiss I've ever had. We break away after a few moments. I start to smile as my eyes open just in time to catch hers opening as well. She's smiling at me, a goofy, soft smile that warms my heart in an instant. "The world didn't end," I say quietly, not even sure what I mean by it. "No, it didn't," she responds, a thoughtful expression crossing her face as she looks down again. Seconds pass. "Happy New Year, Scully," I say after a moment, glancing away from her to give her the space she seems to need. The smile that was present just seconds ago seems to have vanished, and I wonder if I've done something wrong. "Happy New Year, Mulder," she replies quietly, and I feel myself begin to smile. Because this time, I can hear that sweet, goofy smile in her voice, even though it hasn't returned to her face. Perhaps all is right with the world, after all. I put my arm around her shoulders, squeezing her against me for just the briefest of seconds before we head for the elevator. As usual, we stride together, just as we always have. Just as we always will. I smile as I reach out to hold the elevator door for Scully. As I step inside the door, she turns to face me, a single eyebrow quirking towards the sky as that smile returns to her face. No, the world most certainly didn't end... I think a better one began. * * * * -30- * * * story end * * * -30- * * * * * * * * -30- * * * story end * * * -30- * * * * There it is, folks. Hope you liked it. And yes, I really do know a *guy* named Jade. ~Snark snark_911@yahoo.com