From: "vposley" <vposley@mediaone.net>
Date: Sun, 1 Oct 2000 20:28:54 -0400
Subject: story
Source: direct


Title - "Another One"
Author - Liz Catherine Huberman
Rating - G, PG
Classification - VRA - Vignette/Romance/Angst
Spoilers - Pre- season 8
Keywords - Scully pregnancy, Mulder-Scully romance
Summary - Second Letter from Scully to Mulder- Also, read the first one-
"The Letter"


Dear Fox,
This is another letter to you. The baby is due two days from now, and
you're still a no show. I'm so angry at you. You left me, and I still
don't know how or why or where you went or when you're coming back. I
want you back here in my arms, but it's not going to happen, is it? I
feel that it won't. I know i won't have you back. And it hurts, do you
know that? Ofcourse you don't, I would have had to tell you that myself.
I've had so many dreams, and they're never real. You're not real. I wake
myself up, and say, "You stupid girl, he's not real. They're not real.
That wasn't him how could you be so dumb??" I only have so much strength
left in my body, my soul. This pain is so real. It starts in my stomach,
and then in my heart, my lungs, my throat, and I can't even cry then,
and it moves into my brain, and it hurts. It's a dull pain, like someone
is crushing my body and there's nothing I can do about it. I'm so afraid
to have this child. I'm afraid that it won't realize how it came to be,
and I'll never see it again. I wanted to keep it so bad. But I have to
be realistic here. Single mom, working one of the most dangerous jobs in
the world, both personally and professionally, doesn't work at all. It
wouldn't make sense. She's going to go to a good family, with a mother
*and* a father, and a dog, in a big white house with green grass and her
own room. I would have liked to have named her Samantha, but the
adoption agency said that they couldn't allow it. Oh, God, how I miss
you. I wish it could have worked. Skinner has been really helpful. Don't
get jealous, but he's been my lamaze partner. And every time he's said
"Mulder will be back for the next class." I know it's all in vain. I
just am so tired. I want this pain to stop. I don't know what to do
anymore. I miss you so much.
-D