From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org Date: 29 May 2001 02:45:56 -0000 Subject: Anything, Anytime by spookyluv_17 Source: direct Reply To: brandi@clarityconnect.com May 28, 2001 "Anything, Anytime" by:spookyluv_17 spookyluv_17@yahoo.com Spoilers for Leonard Betts and Momento Mori I watched Leonard Betts on the Memorial Day Marathon on F/X and got inspired. Dana Scully Residence Late night/early morning How am I going to explain this? How am I going to tell him that I have cancer? Wait, I don't actually know that I have cancer. All the signs point to it though. Leonard Betts telling me that I have something that he needs, the headaches I've been having,the blood on my pillow just now. How can this happen to me? Wait, I can't think like this. I don't have actual proof, do I? I will go to the doctor tomorrow and see what's going on. Hopefully nothing. As I drive to the hospital, I wonder what I could possibly tell Mulder if I am sick. How do I even tell myself? My family? My thoughts concentrate on the people I love as I drive to the hospital. Mulder. My mother. My brothers. I love them all and I am not prepared to leave them. I quit that train of thought quickly. I don't know that I'm dying but my thoughts keep concentrating on it, like an obsession. I have always been afraid of dying but never like this. I always thought I'd die like most people do. After years of life, after having a husband,children, a house. But, never like this. In the prime of my life before I could find that someone special, have my children and my house. Maybe I've found that someone special.Mulder. Mulder is always there for me, whenever I need him. That's why if I am sick he will be the first to know. It's going to be hard to tell him. I sit in the lounge to wait for the results of my tests. They should've taken a few days to come back but I asked an old friend of mine to do me a favor and rush me the results today.I was tempted to call Mulder and ask him to come wait with me, but there is no reason to worry him if no worry is warranted. My friend comes to find me and I can tell by the look on his face that he had bad news. "Bad news huh?" "You'd better come look at your films." I take one look at them and see a growth staring back at me. It's in my head. A nasal pharyngeal tumor located right by my nose. "That's what I think it is right?" "You're a god doctor Dana, you know what it is...I'm so sorry." "It's not quite what I'd expected to find, but.." "I know..do you know the specifics of this particualr tumor?" "Not really....need brushing up on my medical journals." "Well, it's inoperable, of course, but it can be treated with chemo and radiation. Although I must tell you, the odds of that working are not in our favor." " So I sit back and do nothing?" "Like I said, we can try chemo, you know that there is always a chance." "I know, but I don't know If I can get my hopes up?" "Dana, I'm so sorry..is there anyone I can call." "Um....yeah actually...could you call this number for me?" "Of course." "Thank you." I waited for Mulder to make the twenty minute drive to the hospital, still standing in front of my films, still dressed in green scrubs. I finally heard his footsteps approach me from behind. I could tell it was him. I turn around and see him standing there with a huge bouquet of flowers. I look at them and he jokes about taking them from a room down the hall. Then things turn serious when he sees the films. I explain to him what they are and what we can do about them, nothing. "I don't except that." He says. I don't recall much after that, only knowing Mulder was following me back to my apartment. He said it was to make sure I got home all right. I only agreed because I knew I needed him there with me, to comfort me, maybe even hold me. God, Mulder holding me would be such a comfortright now. I get back to the apartment and pull into a parking space. Mulder found one across the street. I wait by my car for him, holding my flowers. I see him smile at me gently and I smile back. I surprisingly remember how to smile. I grab onto his hand as we walk up to my apartment. We both decide we are famished, and Mulder volunteers to cook me a fantastic dinner. Now I want to see this. He fumbles around in the kitchen while I take a hot bath. It helps to solve my nerves, the hot water with bubbles and the noises I hear Mulder making in the kitchen. I can smell the aromas coming from the kitchen. That's when I feel it. The slow dribbles of blood gushing from my nose. Why is this happening? I'm almost tempted to call Mulder to help me, butI want to spare him all I can. I grab my washcloth and wash the blood from my face and pull the drain to wash it down with the bath water. I change into my pajamas and my bathrobe even though it's still early. When I come out I am hit with the smells coming from my kitchen. Mulder had set the table so elegantly. I couldn't believe it. The food looked wonderful. Salad, pasta, and bread. We eat and chat lightly, neither one wanting to discuss this new issue in my life. Our lives. When we finish eating he washes dishes and I dry. I decide to make coffee while he starts the fireplace. We sit together on the couch and drink our coffee slowly. When I feel Mulder put his arm around my shoulders, I feel a shudder roll through my body. I wait for him to speak, but it takes him a minute to get the words out. "Scully....." "Hmm?" "You know I love you right." "Yeah I know, I love you too." "That's good." I snuggled deeper into his body and he laid his head onto mine. We just sat there for awhile holding eachother. Finally I couldn't stifle my yawns any longer. Mulder knew this. "Scully, I should let you go to bed." "I guess I am tired." I get up with Mulder. He is expecting to go home now, but I don't want him to. "Mulder, want to tuck me in?" "Sure, Scully, anything you want." I smile at him and pull at his hand again. He follows me into my bedroom and I turn suddenly and pull him to me. I hug him tightly and he hugs me back. I really do need this man. I let go of him and turn to my bed. I pull down the covers and crawl into bed. Mulder gently pulls the covers up and over me, covering me to my chin. He leans over and kisses my hairline. "Goodnight Scully." "Night Mulder." He starts to walk away "Mulder?" He stops. "Thank you....for everything." "Anytime Scully...you know that...... Night." With that he turns and starts walking out of my room. "Mulder" He stops again. "Don't leave." "Are you sure." "Yeah, hold me tonight." "Anything Scully." "I think there are some of your sweats in the bottom drawer." "Ok." He changes in the bathroom, and I hear him come out. He lifts the covers and settles behind me,pulling me close. I feel so safe in his arms. "Scully" "Yeah." "I love you." "I love you too Mulder." "Goodnight." "Goodnight....Oh Mulder, thanks for tonight...for this." "Anytime Scully....Anything, anytime." What do ya think? Be kind this is only my second fanfic. If you read it thank you for taking the chance.