From adean@interchg.ubc.ca Tue Apr 01 02:41:32 1997 Subject: April Fools? (1/1) From: adean -------- ****It's well known that the characters and situations of the television program "The X- Files" are the creations and property of Chris Carter, Fox Broadcasting, and Ten-Thirteen Productions; they have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended. ****Feel free to distribute my work, as long as it still contains my name. April Fool's? (1/1) by A. Dean Rating: P.G. Classification: UST, humor SUMMARY: Written in response to Deb's picture challenge from the US magazine. http://ursamajor.simplenet.com/PRhino/morgue.jpg ****Please feel free to send comments APRIL FOOL'S? (1/1) FBI Headquarters Forensic Lab 3 6:58 a.m. April 1, 1997 She snapped the rubber gloves into place and adjusted the sterile instruments in front of her. Scully switched on the overhead microphone, which was dangling precariously over the silver autopsy table. She took a moment to gather her thoughts while staring at the covered body in front of her. From glancing at the biography earlier, she knew it was an adult male whose cause of death was currently unknown. Apparently the man had some ties to the occult and her partner had put forth a request for her to perform the autopsy. She picked up a medium sized scalpel and pulled the ivory sheet off the upper torso of the body. She gasped involuntarily and dropped the sharp instrument that she was holding. It bounced three times on the aluminum floor before settling. No other sounds could be heard coming from inside the room. Scully stood staring at the immobile form on the table below her. She wasn't surprised when the man opened his eyes to return her stare. They held the gaze for a moment. "Happy April Fool's Day Agent Scully... Did I scare you?" Her partner smiled up at her innocently. She pulled off the latex gloves one at a time without saying anything. She continued to keep her eyes at level with his. She placed the gloves on the edge of the table he was lying on. One fell but she didn't bother to pick it up. Scully shook her head slightly. Part of his chest was exposed, as well as the end of his legs from where the sheet didn't cover. She noticed that he had even gone as far as tying a toe-tag on his right foot. She gestured down towards him. "This is a little morbid Mulder, even for you." He continued to smile at her as she pulled off her hairnet. "I'll take that as a compliment." _________________________________________ "I can't believe I let you talk me into this Mulder, I don't think that Skinner is going to find this very funny." She was feeling slightly uncomfortable lying on a table identical to his, wrapped in a sheet and not much else. "Oh come on Scully, with everything that's been going on lately, he'll enjoy a good joke." She flashed him a look which mirrored her skepticism at the humor of the situation. He smiled at her and continued. "Besides, he's on his way down now. We already called his secretary." "Mulder, you do realize the rumors that would circulate if anyone else walked in right about now..." Scully noticed that she had lost his attention. He was practicing his best 'dead' look. It looked as though he wanted her to do the same. She rested her head on her hand. She traced her fingers along the edge of the metallic table that Mulder was lying on in an effort to calm herself. She estimated that they had another ten minutes before Skinner's arrival. He was a notoriously late person. The door to the forensic lab swung open unexpectedly. She glanced up to find herself looking at a very perplexed Assistant Director. He looked as though he was about to say something and then stopped short. She glanced at her partner and wondered once again at the brief lapse of sanity that caused her to be in this situation. Mulder still hadn't moved. She looked back at the man standing in the doorway. He did not look amused. "April Fool's Day Sir???" She spoke the words tentatively, not even sure if she believed them herself. Skinner took the time to look at both of them individually. He seemed at a loss for words. After a moment, he regained his composure. "I expect to see both of you in my office within the hour." He left the room shaking his head and mumbling something under his breath. Scully turned to face her partner. Her hair caught the light from the hanging bulb. He stretched out on the table and turned to face her. He smiled, "I think that went well." She rolled her eyes at him and began to get dressed--- all the while thinking of ways that she could make his toe-tag permanent. _____________THE END ____________________________ Happy April Fool's Day comments? adean@unixg.ubc.ca