From: JP&GP Date: Mon, 23 Aug 1999 19:40:24 -0500 Source: direct Title: As The Clock Ticks (2/2) Keywords: Mulder/Scully Romance/Angst Rating: (Mild) R Author: NinaScully Email: yinyang@centuryinter.net Spoilers: Memento Mori/Redux Summary: Scully learns to live with her cancer but obstacles get in the way. Authors Note: This is the sequel to As The Clock Ticks. I am also planning on making a series of stories which I am working on. So kick back and enjoy the story. As The Clock Ticks (2/2) Nothing surrounds me but light. I feel weightless. I attempt to raise my hand........ I am paralyzed, but I feel the impact the invader has put onto my body. It is hard to think. I try to remember what has happened, but all I see are flashes. I feel myself moving now. I sense a hand covering mine. Maybe its Penny. No...this hand feels warm and loving. I somehow recognize the touch. "Scully?" "Scully can you here me?" Mulder? Is that him? I flutter my eyes open to see a tall lanky figure walking towards me. That is when I realize that I am in a dark, cold hospital room. "Mulder? What...happened." He sits down and takes my hand, placing it on his cheek. " Let's not worry about that. Let's just be thankful your okay." I could sense the hesitation before he spoke which made me ask again. " Mulder? Please....What happened to me?" There is a long silence before he tells me. "You...called me and said you needed me to come over. When I got there, you.....had collapsed. The doctors said that the cancer has grown, and they thought that's why you collapsed." I looked up at him. His eyes were bloodshot and swollen. Is he crying? Oh please don't cry Mulder. " Mulder, I want to go home." I am confused when his face changes expressions. His forehead is wrinkled and it looks like he is in pain. "Scully? Do you know where you are?" A sharp awareness pokes me again. " Hospital?" " Yeah. Do you remember how you got here?" I take a moment to remember how beautiful his voice is. I sit up with Mulder's help and struggle to remember. "Hmh...we were.....at my apartment I think....and the paramedics brought me here." He pulls up a chair and cups his face with his hands. "You scared the shit out of me Scully. I didn't know what happened." " I am sorry Mulder." And I truly was. I do wish I knew what happened but all I remember was being in Mulder's arms. " You don't have to apologize. Let's just be thankful that your back." " I want to go home Mulder." I abruptly say. " Lets see what the doctors say." "Mulder I only passed out... He quickly interrupts me. " Scully please. I am not going to except that you just 'passed out'. I am going to take care of you. I 'll take you back to your place and I am not leaving your side. Now let me go to the nurse and see if you can leave." I can not talk. There is a long moment of silence before he goes and I know better than to break that silence with Mulder's determination. Few minutes pass when he returns. " Come on Scully. We're going home." ************************************************************************************** Mulder is silent on the car ride home. I do not tell Mulder, but I am now just starting to remember what happened in my apartment. I remember that we exchanged some words, but........oh my. I remember them now. 'I love you, Dana.' With that memory in my head I look at Mulder. He must notice I am staring at him when he turns his head. I expected him to ask what is wrong but all he does is give a slight smile and turns to focus on the road. His eyes. Those beautiful eyes. Within them I had seen so many things. Their hazel depths were the pages of a book I could read with magnificent ease. I had looked to their reflection for everything from comfort, to assurance, to the secret of his thoughts. Even now. After what has happened, I can still look through them for comfort. A vague sense of desperation is born in me and increases when we get to my place and I obediently change for bed while Mulder makes me some tea. I feel that I have a need for everything. But right now my need is for Mulder. I walk out of my bedroom and find him hunched over on the couch. "Mulder?" His voice is low and heavy with tears. " Your tea's ready. " I sit down on the couch and lay my hand on his thigh. " Is there anything I can do? " He turns his head and winces at me. " That's supposed to be my line. Don't worry about it. I am fine. " " And that's my line." My arms ache to hold him; my hands to touch him and erase all the pain that the events of his life have imprinted on his soul. I want to fill the empty spaces inside him and make him all that he is meant to be. I want him to know, before it's to late, that he is my salvation. He is my everything. " Please, let me take care of you Mulder. " I say to him. I turn towards him and cup his face. I lean forward and he closes his eyes ever so slightly. My lips brush against his rough cheeks and then his eyelids, kissing away the tears. I kiss his forehead, the mole on his cheek, the corner of his mouth. Mulder is completely still, but I can feel his deep sighs caressing my face. " Let me make you feel better. I want to make you happy. " I kiss the line of his jaw. I find my fingers in his hair as I kiss his temple, his eyelids, the corner of his mouth. Then he pulls me to him, the movement abrupt. His mouth finds mine and his kiss is desperate. We feed each other our fears and pain as our tongues battle. He sets me in his lap, his hand running down my back to the curve of my ass. Grabbing. Thrusting He groans into my mouth as he jerks his hips up. I reach between us and I cup the bulge in his pants, feeling his erection. He drops his mouth to the curve of my shoulder, digging his teeth with in it. I want this. I want him so badly. I want his heat and his hardness and his life inside me. I want my womb bathed in his life-giving seeds. I want his essence and strength. Just as suddenly as he pulls me closer he moves away. He pulls my hand back. I look at him with a surprise. " What?" I ask him. "We can't do this." He is breathless. I lean forward to kiss him but he restrains me. " Don't you want me? " He meets my eyes and laughs. " More than anything. You know that. " " Then why did you stop? " He turns away and makes a sound in his throat that I recognize instantly. It's the " I am going to get into trouble " sound. And then he says. " I've never been very partial to sympathy fucks Scully. Giving or receiving. It occurs to me that I should be highly offended. I open my mouth to tell him so but he turns away. He's right. I sit back on the couch. I am stunned. "Hey." He lifts my chin." Look. We both know we want this and we both know it' s going to happen. But not like this. When we make love I want it to be a homecoming, not a farewell. Never that. Never ask me to do that. I want it to happen because you made up your mind to live--not because you think you may be dying." I felt the sting of tears and looked away. Your right. I am sorry. He dips his head and kisses me tenderly. "Don't start apologizing for wanting to jump my bones Scully." " That's not what I....... He stops me with another kiss. He lifts me up and hugs me. He chuckles and says, " Life's a bitch sometimes huh? " I read his mind and finish the sentence. " And then you.... He places his hand on my mouth. " No way. Don't even think about it. You know...now I have to remind you that I am bigger than you." " Are you threatening me Mulder? " " Nope. I wouldn't dream of it. Now, I am going to put you to bed. " He offers his hand. " C'mon. I'll tuck you in." I take his hand and rise. There is such a sense of safety when I am with Mulder. I know for a fact that we are both strong for having one another. " So Mulder, " I ask as we enter my bedroom. " I don't suppose I can talk you into joining me. Plenty of room." I pat the bed as a meaning of invitation. " Don't tempt me Scully. " He tucks me just like my mother use to and kisses me on the forehead. " I'll see you in the morning." "Mulder?" I let his name linger in the air. He turns around and his eyes meet mine. I try to say the words but the longer he looks at me the harder it is. So I do it with my eyes. * I want you Mulder. Tonight. Tomorrow. Always.* He smiled. " I know Scully. Me too." He shuts the off the light and I welcome the darkness. *********************************************************************************************** Mulder doesn't sleep in the other room anymore. Ever since I started to have nightmares he sleeps in my bed with me. The only way I can get to sleep is when I am held by him. He always tucks me in. I hear him murmur comforting words to soothe me to sleep. I curl against him. My back tightly against his chest. Mulder is my dragon slayer. He casts away all of my nightmares and comes to rescue me. I wish that, like Mulder, I had only one dream. My nightmares a varied like small snowflakes. Each one combined with the others. The darkness is no longer a comfort. There is nothing else but Mulder. *********************************************************************************************** We haven't been in the field for over a month. Mulder and I stay in the office. We just sit and fondle with things incoherently. Right now, we are in the office sitting across from each other. "Mulder?" "Hmh?" " I think I am going to go home." I say abruptly. " Do you want me to give you a ride?" "Sure, why not." I needed Mulder tonight anyway. He gets up and helps me with my coat. The car ride home is quiet. So I decide to to break the silence. "Mulder?" He looks up at me. " Stay with me tonight. " I say it with no hesitation. " Are you all right Dana? " " I am fine." Oh boy those words are new. I decide to tell him the truth. " Actually I am not all right. Please stay with me and I'll tell you. " " Ok." He reaches over and traces my jaw line. We finally come to my apartment. I open the door and I tell Mulder to make himself comfortable. He sits on the couch while I get some tea. I come back and see that he had lit the fireplace. I hand him the mug and sit next to him. " Mulder, I am so scared. I don't understand why this is happening to me. Even though you help me through it it's like it isn't worth it. I still have the same nightmare." "Dana...I want tonight to be the night." He says abruptly. "Excuse me?" " I want this night, to be your homecoming night." I suddenly remember. 'scully I want to make love to you on a homecoming not a farewell' My breath catches in my throat. "Mulder I don't... My words are cut off by his kiss. I fight the urge to give in but I am lost in his mouth. It was chaste at first. I decide I should be the one to deepen the kiss. I bite his lower lip hoping the moans I hear are pleasure rather than pain. "Mulder." I'm out breath. I realize that he has pinned me down on the couch and has already taken his tee-shirt off and mine as well. "We should go to my bedroom." I take his hand and guide him to the bedroom. As we near the bed I unbutton his pants and pull them down to see he is not wearing any underwear. But that's not what I was focusing on. "Mulder." I look up to see he has this huge smirk on his face. " My turn." He says. He reaches behind me to unfasten to bra. " Scully I am going to go insane if I don't get this off you soon!" "Mulder." I show him the buckle is in the front. " God Dana you are every mans dream." He unfastens the bra. I can feel his hands cupping my breasts. "Mulder." We quickly take off our clothes and fall onto the bed. The kisses we share are of need and comfort. We share a night of passion and wanting. Scully's Bedroom 9:30A.M. I wake up feeling a hand on my face. "Good Morning sunshine." We are tangled up in each others arms. "Good Morning Mulder." He kisses my forehead. "I love you Dana." "I love you more." I teasingly reply. " I didn't have any nightmares last night Mulder. I feel so much better." " I wonder why?" We both chuckle. "I love you so much Mulder." I give him a soft kiss. I look into his I eyes. "I want you Fox. Tonight. Tomorrow. Always." "I want you Dana. Tonight. Tomorrow. Always." The End There you go! All done. Feedback Pleaseeeeeee! Email me at xfiler_nina@yahoo.com Thanx