From: "Caroline L S" <majikthize@hotmail.com>
Date: Thu, 27 Dec 2001 01:44:49 +0000
Subject: Title: Becoming One By: Carrie-Leanne
Source: direct


Title: Becoming One   By: Carrie-Leanne

Summary: "The first time was little more than a
heated coupling. Frustrations and years of denial
and restraint culminating in a heated melding of
bodies."

Rating: R (I think?)

Category: MSR

Spoilers: Late season 7 up through season 8 to be
sure, but nothing really specific.

Disclaimer: Hey I don't mention any names in this
piece. It could be anyone right? They are all mine!
Mmwhahahah ;o)


Becoming One
xxxxxxxxxxxx


It didn't happen on their first time.
That was little more than a heated coupling.
Frustrations and years of denial and restraint
culminating in a heated melding of bodies.
For her, a proverbial ray of light illuminating the
path wherein lay truth and madness and oh such
sweet pleasures.
He was surprised when she entered his bed.
Surprised but not unwilling and responded to her
with equal amounts of eagerness. Thus their sweat
slicked skin slid against each others. Mouths
capable of nothing more than soft wet sounds, and
the musky smell of their primitive act permeating
the cool air in the darkened room.
There were no words, no declarations. None offered,
none expected.
Passions achieved and pleasure sought, and when it
was over they parted wordlessly, still not daring
to voice what they held within.
If they thought this one night would be enough to
change their relationship forever they were wrong.
People who have long set in a pattern of behaivour
find it difficult to adjust their perspective, even
when faced with the most earth shattering
conclusions. Sex is no exception, and these two
were long practiced at ignoring events that should
or would have irrevocably altered any other
relationship.
True there was a moment of awkwardness when they
first met again, this time in the stark light of
day, fully clothed and all business. A moment of
poised silence, weighted with all that had so far
remained unsaid. A brief shy smile in reassurance
that they were still indeed able to breathe.
But events of their lives overtook them and before
they had time to even process what their one
frantic exchange meant, fate had dealt them more
important concerns.

Time passed and life returned, or rather continued
as normal. Both of them knew that things had
changed very subtley, yet both were averse to
acknowledge that change lest the other should not
feel what their own soul ached to experience.
Of course when one attempts to conceal or brush
aside the quest burning in ones heart, sooner or
later the cracks appear.
It was he who cracked first.
They fought. Over something incredibly stupid and
minor.
In their entire relationship they had never fought.
True they disagreed and sometimes even argued quite
heatedly but this was different. It was vindictive
and personal.
She walked out on him, too stung by his words to
formulate a response of her own. Realising
belatedly what he had done he retreated horrified
into shame and guilt by his own malicious intent.
It was her who sought to mend the breach first,
knowing that a bridge needed to be formed to at
least regain their previous position in each others
life.
When he opened his apartment door to find her stood
there eyes reddened by his hurtful words, his heart
tightened painfully and he swept her into a
wordless embrace.
He took her right there not bothering with trifles
such as comfort and pleasure. It was need that
drove him. He needed to possess her she needed to
be wanted by him. They coupled like beasts, frantic
and fast and ultimately unsatisfying except on the
most base level.
But it didn't matter. All that mattered was the
reaffirmation of their connection. The one thing he
feared they had broken in that previous wild act
and now sought to repair in this second one.
And afterwards they took time out to actually talk.
Still unable to fully articulate their feelings
they laughed nervously and admitted to the physical
attraction between them. Despite all this the deep
emotional connection they both knew they shared
remained undisclosed and unacknowledged.

After the catharsis that was their second time
things were easier between them. The recognition of
their physical need seemed to have the affect of
removing the pressure. The knowledge that they'd
agreed to at least admit to if not exercise that
need openly between themselves when it grew too
great was in itself a relief.
And again life continued. Things changed in the way
that they always had and time passed slowly as if
it had all the time in the world. Yet for one of
them a bomb was ticking, silently and malevolently,
though neither of them would know yet.

The third time was a given.
A first, an evening in each others company that
started out with the intent of fun. After the
initial surprise of finding themselves in a strange
town with time and money to enjoy they quickly made
a serious attempt to do just that. Years and cares
fell off them and they laughed, danced and flirted.
The conclusion was inevitable.
Yet again their union took physical form, expertly
exercising long dormant skills to bring pleasures
long denied to each other. Nobody could fault their
technical skill, nobody could deny the enthusiasm
in their embrace. Yet they drew back at emotional
expression. They deferred from open revelation of
that which they both held buried in their hearts.
They woke together, no shyness, no awkwardness this
time.
The final test of their acceptance of this new
physical belonging and they passed with flying
colours. But still something remained hidden
beneath their cloak of denial.
They were not one.

After that something changed. She wouldn't know
until it no longer mattered what it was, but for
him the time bomb had reached critical. Torn
between acceptance of his fate and denial of it
existence he hid the truth from her, still seeking
his own panacea as he had sought one for her all
those years before.
And if outwardly his affection for her was more
obvious and she responded in kind, what did it
matter?

It happened on the fourth time.
It was a natural progression. No life threatening
situation (beyond his own dire straits), no family
tragedy, no faith testing case. Just an awkward
request from him for her company that evening. She
accepted of course and they didn't really watch the
video they set out to see. They didn't really have
an appetite for the popcorn and beer that he
provided as distraction from the main event. In
many ways they didn't even expect the evening to
end in passion. After all they'd shared one or two
similar nights of friendship like this which had
been just that.
Something about this night made it different.
Afterwards, neither of them would be able to say
what it was.
All she knew was that after the movie finished he
looked at her in that way he'd looked at her for so
many years but which she'd only just learned to
recognise. And she reached up to kiss him.
By unspoken agreement they moved their embrace into
his bedroom. She lay on the bed and allowed him to
strip her slowly and them himself. It amazed her
how he could be so unconscious of his own body
while she lay there trembling with anticipation.
This time was different.
He explored her body with his tongue, his mouth,
and his hands. He revelled in the softness of her
flesh, the smooth skin of her back and neck, the
taught peaks of her breasts, the fine downy hair on
her arms. The heated folds between her legs
received lavish attention which bought her to the
brink of ecstasy. No inch was left unexplored. Her
skin sensitised beyond control by his touch.
She allowed him his exploration before returning
the sentiment with a thorough exam of her own. Her
mouth following her hands as they lingered on the
hard muscles in his arms and thighs, expertly
teasing the one area he wanted her touch the most.
If her flesh was liquid fire after his exploration,
his was surely molten gold.
Their mouths returned once again to each others and
their bodies pressed together, his heated core
slipping easily between her folds. With little
guidance he entered her and they began a slow dance
of passion to their own tune.
His thrusts began slow and almost casual and she
met each one with her arched body, their tongues
and limbs remaining entwined throughout.
The rhythm picked up as inevitably it must. She
adjusted her body to facilitate both their pleasure
to greater heights and they were forced to break
lip contact through the need to draw more oxygen to
cope with the demand they placed upon their bodies.
They clutched almost desperately at each other,
their bodies articulating so well what their voices
found hard to express.
When the end came it took form of an explosion of
white hot pleasure that branded their souls with
its intensity. And at that moment crystalline
clarity struck with the knowledge that mere words
could not hope to reflect what their act of love
had done that night.
They had become one.

Authors Note:
First off, thanks for reading.
This is a bit more abstract than my normal style
but as I'm still finding my feet in this writing
thing I thought I'd give it a go.
I'd really like to know how the experiment turned
out. If you enjoyed it, please let me know. If you
hated it, tell me to stop: Majikthize@Hotmail.com