From: Eyegypt Date: 10 Aug 1998 02:53:04 GMT Subject: **NEW: Beer, Cigarettes and Videotape by Carolina Disclaimer: Fox and 1013 don't sue me. I'm just borrowing your characters for a harmless little story. I won't let anyone give me any money. Title: Beer, Cigarettes and Videotape Rating: PG Category: S, UST (very little MSR) Summary: a couple days in the lives of our agents Setting: Sometime before The End (so, lets say middle-end of Season 5) Spoilers: Beyond the Sea THANKS TO DEB FOR PROOFING, AGAIN -------------------------------------------------------------------------- She just stared at him, his attempt at sarcastic humor once again managed to get no reaction from her; so, he just smiled and lifted the police tape for her to duck under. They marched over to their rented Ford and climbed in. "Sorry about this." She only nodded. This case captured Mulder's attention after he read it off the news wire. So, he dragged his poor partner away to Vancouver, Washington only to discover that it didn't have the signs of the X-Files he had hoped for. Local law enforcement and the FBI Field Office could handle it. They drove in silence to the Portland airport and booked a flight back to DC. Of course, the soonest one was not leaving for another five hours, not to mention the four-hour flight. They both went straight to the bar and sat in a cushioned booth. Scully immediately pulled out her latest edition of the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA). Taking out his pack of sunflower seeds, Mulder began munching while watching the baseball game on the TV. Finally, a waitress came over to them. "Can I get you two something to drink?" "Just water," Scully responded. "I'll have an IceHouse," Mulder finished. She nodded and left. Mulder began drumming his fingers to the beat of the music playing in the bar. Soon, the whole table was slightly vibrating irritating Scully to the extreme. She put down her magazine and gave him a look that told him to stop or else. He dropped his hands into his lap. "Sorry." She replied by picking up her magazine and continuing to reading. This silence wasn't unusual for them, if there wasn't a case to talk about then there wasn't much else to do. Their drinks came and Mulder greedily drank his. Scully arched an eyebrow when he slammed down the finished beer bottle and indicated to the waitress that he wanted another one. "You better not get drunk; I don't want to have to carry your ass on that plane," Scully informed him. "Don't worry, Mom." She sighed, "I'll be right back." With that, she got up and left. "I was beginning to think you ditched me," Mulder said when she returned 30 minutes later. "I would be so lucky," she threw back in her teasing tone, which wasn't mush different from her serious one. Mulder smiled. Just then, a man sat in the table next to their booth and instantly lit up a cigarette. There was something about beer and the smoke that made Mulder crave a cigarette. He must of had a look on his face that betrayed his thoughts because Scully asked, "Mulder, did you used to smoke?" "Yes. I picked up the habit in High School and I quit right before you were assigned to work with me, as a matter of fact. You?" She smiled and let out a little laugh, "When I was in Junior High, just to rebel, I used to sneak some of my mother's when she used to smoke and smoke them on the back porch late at night. I also did in college, just because I was away from home and I could without getting caught." He smiled at her memory. "I have to see a man about a mule; I'll be right back." When he came back, Scully heard him drop something on the table. She peered over her magazine to find a pack of Morley Lights and book of matches. "Join me?" he asked. She simply nodded, though she wasn't sure why. After packing the cigarettes, he opened them and handed one to her. He struck a match and held it to the cigarette; she lightly held his hand to steady the flame. Once she got it going, he lit himself one. Immediately, he felt the nicotine and tar flood his body. It had been a while, but it felt good. "Can you make rings?" he asked his smoking buddy. She nodded, inhaled and blew out little rings. "Cool. How do you do that? I've always wanted to do that." "You just inhale and when you exhale you make an "O" sound in your throat." "Really?" She nodded and took another drag. He tired it and it worked, except he had to make loud "O" sounds, whereas Scully's were silent. "See?" He nodded, "Thanks Scully. Now all of life's mysteries have been solved for me." She smiled, she actually smiled, then reached over and took a sip of his beer. "You want one?" he asked. She pondered it then nodded. 3 Hours Later The waitress came over and emptied their almost full ashtray and removed several beer bottles, handing them each a fresh one. She couldn't figure out if they were in some kind of competition to see who could drink and smoke the most; she was just hoping for a big tip. "Scully, when was the last time you were really drunk? Like sick in the morning, headache, full nine yards?" She thought for a second, then answered, "My brother's wedding." "Bill?" She nodded. "I bet your family loved that." "That's why it was the last time." "Give me a mental image of a drunk Dana Scully." "Let's see, where to start. It might have been the fact that I was making out with my equally drunk date at the table in front of the family priest and my parents or maybe standing on the buffet table to give my brother a drunk good luck toast." He laughed at the thought of Scully making an ass out of herself at Bill's wedding. "I would've paid money to see that." "Oh, believe me, there's video of it." "I know whose mom I'm calling when we get back. I think the Gunman might want to put some of the images in their next newsletter." "Just try it Mulder." He gave her a wicked smile in return. Delta Airlines Somewhere over Wisconsin The Stewardess pushed the cart passed the sleeping couple. She thought they looked so peaceful. The redhead's head was on her boyfriend's (?) shoulder and his head was resting on top of hers. Needless to say, their position was due to the fact that they were drunk on beer and nicotine. It was severe turbulence ten minutes later that brought Scully out of her coma. In the process of jerking her head up, she collided skulls with Mulder causing a pounding pain. "Ouch, Scully," Mulder complained while rubbing his head. "Sorry," she mumbled, while gripping the arm rests as the plane rocked and rolled a little more. This, of course, had no effect on Mulder. The turbulence went on for another ten minutes, but to Scully it felt like an eternity and the fact that she had put away several beers and cigarettes that her body wasn't used to wasn't helping. So, as soon as the rocking stopped, she bolted to the bathroom leaving a very dazed Mulder behind. When she returned from emptying her stomach, Mulder was already passed out again. `That boy could sleep through the Second Coming,' she thought. Feeling a lot better, she asked for a Coke from the stewardess and plugged in the airline headphones to listen to some music. Washington, DC After reclaiming their bags from Baggage Claim, they both made their way to the parking lot. Mulder had picked her up, so he had to take her home. Lucky from them, it was 11 pm on a Friday so they didn't have to worry about making it into work. "Want to get a drink, Scully?" Mulder teased. "Just take me home." She was dead tired now. "Your wish is my command." Mulder carried her bag up to her apartment once they arrived, said goodnight, apologized again and left. Scully went straight to her bathroom to wash up for bed. Her teeth felt like they were wearing sweaters. Just as she was spitting out a glob of toothpaste, she heard someone knocking on her door. She rinsed and went to the door only to find Mulder. Surprise, surprise. "My car won't start," he grumbled. "Come in. You can sleep on the couch." She held the door open for him as he shuffled into her living room, plopping down on the sofa. "Thanks, Scully." "No problem. You know where everything is; I'm going to bed. Good night." "Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite." 3:00 am "Scully?" "This better be good," she mumbled into her pillow. "I'm too big for your couch and it's uncomfortable." "Shit Mulder . . ." "I swear I tried, but . . ." "Fine. Just be quiet." She shifted over on the bed so that he could climb in on the other side. "I should have made you call a cab . . ." she trailed off as she fell back to sleep. Mulder lay on his back and was asleep in seconds. 9:30 am Scully awoke to find herself wrapped in Mulder's arms. `Perfect,' she thought sarcastically to herself. She really needed to pee. Screw him. She got up and of course he didn't even stir. After taking a shower, having breakfast and reading the paper, Scully went back to her room to find Mulder still asleep. It was now close to Eleven o'clock. She walked over and gently began to shake his arm. Then in a matter of a second, he grabbed her arms and flipped her on to the bed, pinning her beneath him. "Jesus, Mulder!" She now knew what it was like to have a heart attack. He looked down at her, letting his eyes and mind adjust. "Sorry, Scully, you scared me. I lost my bearings for a second," he replied while keeping her pinned beneath him. "I must say you do look kind of sexy lying prone under me." "Why don't you let go of my wrists and I'll show you what it's really like to have me beneath you," she told him in a deep, sexy voice he had never heard from her. He slowly let her go. Immediately, she violently shoved him back so that he fell off the end of her bed. "Get you car fixed, Mulder," she said as she stepped over his body on the way out of her room. "You're no fun, Scully." "That's not what my date to my brother's wedding said." "Did you push him off your bed?" he complained. "Just the opposite, Mulder," she retorted. `I set myself up for that one,' he thought. The tow truck finally came taking Mulder and his car away from Scully for the rest of the weekend. Monday Morning Scully made her way down to their office; she opened the door to find Mulder engrossed in something on the TV. Quietly making her way around him, she was shocked to find what he was watching. "Mulder!" He spun around with a grin on his face. "This is great stuff, Scully. I think we should show this at the next FBI Christmas Party." "Mulder, where did you get that." She moved to turn off the TV, but he swatted her hand away. "You're mother, who else. Paid her a little visit after my car was fixed. She was all too eager to share this little gem with me. Here, let me show you my favorite part." He reran the tape a few frames back and pressed play. In the background of the video you could clearly make out Scully and her date in a fierce lip lock while she was sitting in his lap. "Figures you'd like that part, you voyeur," she replied while crossing her arms across her chest, trying not to die of embarrassment. "Oh, it gets better." Soon you could see Scully's dates hand working his way up her dress. "Jeez, it's been a long time since I've gotten that much action," she mused. He just gapped at her. She figured she might as well not act upset then he might lose interest in that tape. "God, look at how young a was." She continued to watch the video; then there was a clip of her and her father dancing. Scully felt tears well up in her eyes and then the screen went blank. Turning around, she saw that Mulder turned it off because he could see how it was making her feel. "You really loved him." "Yes, I did." "I envy that." She tried to smile at him, but a tear ended up sliding down her cheek instead. He took a step forward and held her in his arms. In turn, she wrapped her arms around him and leaned her head on his chest. He kissed the top of her head, then rested his cheek there. "I'm sorry about the video; I was being immature." "It's okay. She could have shown you the one of me running around the house nude as a little girl." He laughed, "That's okay, I'd rather see a full grown, naked Dana Scully than a 3 year old naked one." She leaned back from his embrace to give him the arched eyebrow look. He became bold, leaned down and kissed the eyebrow causing her eyes to flutter shut. Mulder kept his lips there for a couple of seconds then gathered her into another hug. They stayed like that until the phone rang. He moved to pick it up. "Mulder." He responded to the caller with an "okay" and "yes". "Who was that?" she asked when he hung up. "Skinner's admin. He wants to see us A.S.A.P." "You can explain the expense report for that useless trip," she informed him as she made her way to the door. "I already told you I was sorry." "Uh huh." THE END Feedback: Eyegypt@aol.com