From: Vbjess@aol.com Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 20:46:09 EDT Subject: fanfic......a christmas carol Source: direct Here's a sappy little thing I wrote one nite after some company left.....I had a killer headache at the time, and it was very warm in my room, which probably explains this new concept/style of writing for me. Please excuse any typos or spelling errors. Shipper warning. Language Warning. Hallway Scene Warning Sappy/corny/cheesy fanfic warning. Spoilers: Paper Hearts (btw....I changed the dates around a little bit....paper hearts now occurs at Christmastime) Rated: PG-13 POV: Alternates between Mulder and Scully....sorry if that confuses you at all! And a special thanx to Katy, who has listened to me read this, and helped me to edit it! ---================X================--- "A Christmas Carol" I walked into my apartment,tired and hungry, and to tell the truth, really disturbed by our last case. Something in me said that the holiday season would not be real great. I fell onto the couch, and flipped the t.v. on out of habit. My stomach demanded food. I got up, and raided the kitchen. Great. A can of soup, about a year old. I put it in a pan, and once again fell on the couch. My mind wouldn't leave the sight of that girl. She was so cold. That freezing water...it's a miracle she survived the cold, let alone the freezing water, and the cold. When we pulled her out, I just saw Samantha. I saw her when we were kids, climbing the big tree in our backyard. I felt tears falling out of my eyes. I quickly brushed them away. I got up, and opened a beer, hoping to get somewhat drunk. I looked around, feeling so lonely, and truthfully, afraid. Afraid of being alone forever. I threw the beer back in the fridge, and turned the stove off. I had to get out of here. I quickly changed into my jeans and a t-shirt, grabbing my leather jacket as I left my apartment. The pale, cold, clammy face of that young girl flooded back into my mind as the snow hit me in the parking lot. I had just climbed into bed when I heard someone knocking at my door. I sighed, got up, and answered it. "Scully?" "Mulder, what's wrong?" He looked at me, just looking so haggard, and pathetic. He walked in, turned around, and looked at me. "I'm sorry, I just had to get out of my apartment. It was just so," He searched for the word. "Lonely?" I suggested. He nodded. I slowly put my arms around him, and laid my head on his chest. I felt his arms go around me. His head went to it's spot on the top of my head, and I relaxed, feeling safe and comfortable. "I know what you mean. I can't seem to get those images out of my head. Is that what's bothering you? Is it Samantha?" "Yeah." He whispered, slowly answering. "Let's sit down." We reluctantly left each other's arms, and moved over to the couch. I moved close to him, and tried not to think about how sexy he always looked in those jeans and jacket. "Tell me Mulder. Tell me what's bothering you." I looked into her eyes, and saw that she was sincere as always. I tried not to think about the fact that she was in only a thin nightgown, and how much I wanted her. I felt my eyes roam over her as she prompted me to answer. "Mulder?" I sighed. "Every time I think about what happened out there, I start thinking about Samantha, and how many times I've so close, just to have it snatched away. Scully, I don't know how much more of this I can take by myself. But, if I quit searching, I know that I would have just been so close, and have never found her, and..." I heard her sigh. "I know Mulder. I know." "Scully, because of you I have kept myself going. I do it because I know I can. I know that if I'm looking in the wrong place, you'll steer me in the right direction. You help make me a better person. I know that I can trust you, and if I need help, you'll be there. I just...can't think of any other way to say it. I guess that's why I came here tonight.It's the only place I really can feel safe in. Even my own apartment doesn't feel safe to me half the time. There's almost always someone either watching it, or waiting in it. I guess what I'm trying to say is...." She leaned closer, and pulled me close. "I know Mulder, I know." Suddenly, I felt a tear on my face, but it wasn't my own. I pulled away, to see Mulder's face wet with tears. I carefully wiped them away with my hand. "Mulder, you'll find her. I'm sure of it. I've never seen your dedication in anyone before. I know how much you love her, and I'm sure that someday, you will find her, and she will have been wanting to see you just as much as you want to see her. And I hope I'll be there, right by your side, there for you if you need me. I can't remember a time when I haven't had you crashed on my couch, bleeding, or tripping over your shoes in the hallway, or getting a call from you at two am, wanting me to meet you somewhere on some crazy hunch." I smiled, and continued. "There's no one else I would rather be sitting here with right now, trying to make the hurt a little less." I suddenly had a vision of us, old and world-worn, with him dying in my arms. The thought was almost too much to bear. I thought about all the times he had saved me, and I found myself wishing that I could be there for him whenever he needed...even if we were ever re-assigned. I saw us living our lives together, at Mom's for Christmas, watching Bill's kids every once in a while, Mulder finally getting to meet Charlie....And I saw all of that being taken away by him dying too soon. I saw him gasping for breath, trying tot ell me something. And I found I hadn't been listening to him. I felt tears fall down the side of my own face. "Scully, I can't tell you enough how much you mean to me. There just aren't words to describe it." Suddenly, I knew what I had to say. "I love you." 'There. I said it. Fox William Mulder, you have been a fool not to say it sooner. Wait a minute, did she just say what I think she said?' Now it was my turn to wipe her eyes. But why was she crying? "I love you." I laughed, and watched him try to figure out what just happened. I was a little unbelieving myself. Did we both just say 'I love you' at the same time?!? "Scully, I-" She cut me short by pressing her lips to mine. A long, full kiss that we both had needed for a long time. I replied hungrily. I let my tongue slip into her mouth, carefully exploring. I heard a soft moan escape from her. She was enjoying this as much as I was. I heard someone moan, and was surprised that it was coming from me. I had felt his tongue enter my mouth and slowly explore. I didn't argue. Oh he just felt so good with his arms around me like that! All I could think of was the two of us, and never going out of each other's sight for more than a few minutes. Finally we broke contact. I smiled, and watched a playful grin spread over his face. I could still see the hurt in his eyes, but it has lessened considerably. "Feel better?" I playfully asked. "Much." I smiled, hinting that I wouldn't mind if he stayed here tonight. He took the hint. "Mulder, do me a favor." "Anything." "Take off your jacket." He sheepishly smiled, having forgotten about it. I pushed it off his shoulders, and he shrugged it off. I put my arms arousing his neck, ready for more. I smiled widely at him. He returned the smile. I pulled her close, ready to finish what we started. I closed my eys, and buried my face in her hair, which smelled so good, as always. I would always associate Scully with that smell. It was absolute heaven. A small part of me told me that we would never finish this. We had started a relationship that would last a lifetime. I put my mouth to hers, feeling her move closer. I didn't think that was possible at all, but apparently so. Suddenly, I felt her pulling away from me. I let go. I searched her eyes, trying to find what was wrong. She smiled, and I knew that everything was fine. Better than fine. *Wonderful*. "Merry Christmas Mulder." "Merry Christmas to you too Scully. Do me a favor?" She nodded. "Anything." "Call me Fox." "Sure Fox. But if I call you Fox, you have to call me Dana." I smiled. "Anything." Something in me said that this would be the best holiday I had ever had. ---================X================--- I would really appreciate some feedback. Tell me if I should fuel the computer viruses, or keep going. This is one of my first attempts at publishable fanfic, so please help me out here! E-mail me at either: vbjess@aol.com techie_girl4@yahoo.com If you have any questions/comments/ responses, feel free to send them! Thankee!!