From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org Date: Sat, 15 Jan 2000 23:31:26 -0600 Subject: Contemplation by X-Chica Source: direct Reply To: scullymulder60@hotmail.com Title: Contemplations Author: X-Chic Rating: PG Category: MSR (very) Note: I would like this fan fiction to be posted anywhere, as long as my name, e-mail, and web site stay on here (the header). So feel free to archive wherever you want. Summary: At an important time Mulder and Scully think about some very touchy issues. Feedback: I would love to hear what you have to say. E-mail at scullymulder60@hotmail.com Spoilers: None Web Site: http://members.tripod.com/scully60/ E-Mail: scullymulder60@hotmail.com It was a dark and quite night on the road to Alabama. Mulder sat in the front seat of his SUV and thought. He had been doing this quite often, and had discovered many things. For example he realized the reason he clung to Scully was his need for companionship. Actually he had been thinking about Scully during this mind-numbing drive. He would look over at her time to time and just stare in awe. He wondered. As he kept looking at her he realized even more what she meant to him. The more he stared the more he thought about what they had been through together, and why she did it. He thought was it all for him? Or was it an act of loyalty for the FBI? Maybe it was because she felt bad for him. He really had to stop questioning all this nonsense. Still the question lingered in his mind of whether he needed her or she needed him. Of course there was the one moment in his apartment hallway where the thought there might be a glimmer of hope that their relationship could be more that a partnership. On the other hand now that he had looked back on that moment it did seem that he was trying to seduce her into staying. So it was apparent to him that he needed her, but he hoped she didn't know this. He hoped for this at least not yet, and until the time was right. X x X x X x X x X x X x As she lay scrunched near the window in that stuffy SUV Dana Scully tried to pretend she was asleep. Actually she desperately needed sleep, but it was becoming increasingly hard to achieve this goal with Mulder's eyes boring into her. It was almost as if he was trying to get inside her head. Sitting there made her wonder. She wondered about what went on inside his head. She sat there with her eyes closed wondering if he actually thought about her. Fox Mulder had toyed with her many times before. The embrace in his hallway, and on New Years. She had thought that the hallway incident was a fluke, a desperate plea for companionship. When he acted again on New Years she had thought about it more deeply. Does he even think about these things, or am I reading into this more that I should. Fox Mulder was a hard man. When one tried to pry into his soul you would get many doors that needed to be force open. But when you had that one chance to see what was going on inside his head he would immediately construct a new blockade to prevent you for accessing him. Scully though to her self, " I guess that rigid appearance is what makes him so less vulnerable. I guess I do this too, but only in fear that Mulder will find out and use it against me." X x X x X x X x X x X x All this time the two sat in complete silence not expressing any contemplation about each other. Maybe it was this that kept them separated for each other, keeping that professional distance in their relationship, and stopping the progression of their relationship that has so much potential. X-Chic What do you think? E-Mail me. scullymulder60@hotmail.com