From: FirePhile@aol.com Date: Mon, 27 Sep 1999 22:37:04 EDT Subject: New: Decline and Fall (1/1) by FirePhile Source: xff Title: Decline and Fall Author: FirePhile (FirePhile@aol.com) Rating: PG-13 Classification: VA Spoilers: Biogenesis Summary: Someone's reached their breaking point. Set three months after the events of Biogenesis. Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully, Skinner, are not mine they belong to 1013, CC&Co and FOX. I'm sure they're very grateful for that fact. Anything else I mention isn't mine either. Author's notes at end. Dana Scully was out of patience and out of money, not necessarily in that order. They were in some godforsaken place and had been for the past, well, at her last count, two months. Today, her credit card was rejected by the young woman sitting behind the counter, who cut it without even looking up from her "Mademoiselle" magazine. The snap of plastic made her feel an almost physical pain, and Scully chided herself for feeling even a smidge of embarassment. Two months ago, Mulder pulled out a file on some ghost or mythical creature and decided that they would investigate. The Bureau only gave them two weeks on their corporate card, so they had to foot the rest of the bill themselves. Mulder had offered to pay for her but she rejected that quickly, not wanting to let him feel like she needed his care. However, looking down at the two forlorn pieces of plastic on the counter, she almost wished she had accepted his offer. Well, this was it, she either had to admit to him that she was broke, or go home abruptly. Her boots crunched on the fallen leaves as she stepped out of the truck and walked towards him. He sat on a large rock, staring across the lake with binoculars. "I thought you said it came out only at night," she said, sitting down near him, shivering slightly at the changing temperatures. "Shhh, you'll frighten it away," Mulder whispered, not turning to look at her. "It's an apparition, not a wild animal. And I'm seriously beginning to wonder if I shouldn't reclassify it as a hallucination." "It exists, Scully. Twenty eyewitnesses saw the same figure..." "Mulder, I might have believed that two months ago, but we've been here for so long and nothing has turned up. It's been two months, I've had jobs that haven't lasted this long. I haven't seen my apartment in two months, two months, Mulder, and for what? A..." she trailed off, unable to put into words the anger she was feeling. "You could leave anytime," he said, in such an offhanded way that she actually blinked in surprise. "That's not the point." "You said this is a waste of time, go back to DC if you want, I'm not leaving until I see this thing." "But, that might never happen. Do you want to spend your life...like the guy searching for Big Blue?" She realized what she said and wanted to take it back, but couldn't. "I already do, at least this way I won't have to travel." She resisted the urge to push him off the rock and into the fast moving current. Her mouth opened slightly and then closed: she was speechless. "Don't you even care about what's happening?" "What's happening?" "The artifact, the ship, the plans being made while you're staring across a lake looking for Lady...Godiva." "It's Lady Asrea, who came over..." "I know the story, I've had two months to read and research the file. You didn't answer my question." "No." "No?" "I don't care." Unconsciously she took a step back, "I don't believe you." "Scully, I was hearing voices, they had me to a point where I was literally insane and I don't want that to happen again." "What do you mean?" "For every conspiracy I undercover there are thirty more waiting at the door, for every person I expose there are more in the wings, every time I fight them, I lose, every single fucking time. Tell me why I should care." He looked straight at her and she didn't blink. Her reaction surprised both of them, "I can't tell you how exhausting it's been to pull you back into the fray, I can't explain to you how tired I am of fighting. I'm sick of this. My patience is gone. If you want to be here searching for Lady Asrea for the rest of your life, go right ahead, but I'm not going to stand by and watch the world fall apart. Before, you dragged me into it, but now that I finally believe you, finally know what's going to happen, you back out. I never thought you would quit. But you have, and you let them win." "More importantly, this," she pointed at him and then herself, "is not a partnership and hasn't been for months. And this," she indicated the lake, "is certainly not an X-File, more like a two month vacation in the middle of nowhere. I hope you enjoyed your rest, because while you're staring at the damn Lake Woman, the smoking man and his friends are planning colonization." "But you said so yourself, Scully, we've won." She remembered her words and mentally cursed herself, she had said that, God, how could she have ever believed it? There was enough room on the rock for two people and she sat down next to him. "Do you want me to admit that I was wrong?" "It doesn't matter anymore. Nothing does." She blinked slowly and they sat in silence for a few moments, then she leaned towards him. "Mulder, what is the real reason why we've been here for two months?" He didn't answer for a few minutes, and when he did he spoke to the ground. "I have been trying to get up the courage..." She felt her heart try to escape her chest and forced herself to stay calm. "Courage to do what?" "Leave," he whispered. She gasped softly, hearing the unspoken 'you' in his voice. "Leave? Where would you go?" "Anywhere, maybe I'll stay here and become the town recluse, or go back to school and finish getting my doctorate, or start another subject...anywhere, anything, but this." "But you've devoted your life to the X-Files, to the FBI, you said so yourself, our destiny is to stop this thing." He stood abruptly and walked over to the car, "Maybe, it's only your destiny." Don't let this happen, don't let it end this way, her thoughts screamed as he reached for the car door. Temporary paralysis vanished as she ran towards him and blocked his escape. "Scully, this isn't working, you can't change my mind," he said, but he couldn't look at her. "You can't leave, not now." "Why not?" Just tell him, tell him, tell him, her thoughts chanted and she ignored them. "Because you're stronger than this, you've been through worse -- we've been through worse," she reached up a hand to his face, gently caressing his cheek. "You're important to me." He reacted as if she'd slapped him and he blinked quickly, close to tears. "I can't stay, I can't keep fighting them. There's too much at stake, they'll destroy me and I'll wind up...back in that place." He shivered slightly. Scully dropped her hand, "Our lives have always been at risk." Mulder shook his head, "It doesn't matter anymore. You've always been the stronger one." She reached out and held his hand, "No, you have and I know you can get beyond this." "I no longer want to." He looked down at her and his expression made her chest hurt. She wanted to reach out to him, hold him tightly, kiss him roughly, force him to stay with her, to keep fighting, but she wasn't that type of woman. Scully nodded numbly and moved out of the way, letting go of his hand, "I can't believe you're leaving." But he was climbing into the car and the engine rumbled to life. Mulder's last words broke though her walls, "You'll get over it, you always do." Then he drove off, leaving her frozen in place, she'd let him go and now she felt lost and confused. He rejected their partnership and everything he stood for, but she couldn't tell him how she felt, because she knew that kind of rejection would be too painful for her to handle. Scully stumbled over to the rock and covered her face with her hands. Silent tears blurred her vision and she sat for a long time, trying to replan her future. After a while, she looked up and out into the woods, wiping away tears with her palms and smoothing down her hair. Through the trees Scully saw a flash of luminescent light in the shape of a woman and heard her cell phone ringing. END Author's Notes: I'm incapable of writing happy stories. I started this a while ago and my muse let me finish it today. It's sort of my take on an alterate result of Biogenesis. Anyway, please send all feedback to FirePhile@aol.com and thanks to my betas, Ali and Danielle, for their great suggestions on the ending. Also, thanks to Amanda, Ash, and Anna for their constant support in everything I do. The title of this story is from an Evelyn Waugh novel. Thanks for reading!