From: Amatia Date: Sat, 6 Mar 1999 17:48:11 -0600 (CST) Subject: "Desert and Rain" (1/1) by Amatia Title: Desert and Rain Author: Amatia Email: violinst@pitnet.net Disclaimer: "Blah, blah, blah..." Mulder, "Monday" Category: V, A, slash Rating: PG-13 for swearing, sexual themes, and dark thoughts. Spoilers: "SR819" Summary: Set immediately after "Dark Frontier"...Krycek finds out that Mulder isn't as blind to desire as he thought. Note: This is the ninth and final piece in the "Hawk and a Handsaw" series. In order (by episode, not written) they are: "1969", "Fly", "Approaching Armageddon", "One Hand", "Nice Work If You Can Get It", "Crater", "Satellite", "Dark Frontier", and this one. You can find them on my webpage at: http://personal.pitnet.net/london/fic/fanfic.html *** "Desert and Rain" by Amatia Mulder was moving closer to me, and there was no way to get around him. I'd tried. "Mulder, let me go, before Scully comes in here and shoots me..." "You haven't answered my question," he growled. "And I can't answer it," I replied harshly. He was now less than a foot away from me. I jerked my gun from my waistband. "Let me go." "You won't shoot me." I released the safety. "You think I won't?" "I think you won't," he said in reply, moving back a step and crossing his arms over his chest. His calmness infuriated me. "Mulder. Let me leave." "I want to know why every time things are getting bad with the Syndicate, you appear and give me some information, or you save my ass, or you infect my boss with some weird disease!" "Me giving Skinner the technology has nothing to do with the Syndicate." "Then why'd you infect him with it?" "Power." I raised the gun so that it was pointed at his forehead. "Now let me leave." "Keep talking," was his reply. "Damnit, Mulder, I'll shoot you." I felt utterly helpless, even with the gun in my hand. All Mulder had to do was raise his hand, and I'd let him have the gun. "You won't. Keep talking." "It was a project of mine, and I now control the men who want it. Senator Matheson, for example. By infecting Skinner with the nanoprobe technology, I made it impossible for SR819 to pass in the Senate. Now, whomever wants the technology has to go through me. And this time I will not hand it over like I did with the vaccine for the black cancer!" "You know the minute they pull a gun on you, you'll hand it over, Krycek." "I won't." "That's about as likely as you pulling the trigger right now," he replied, reaching up, and taking the gun from my unresisting hand. "You're nothing, tovorish." I'd hit him in the face before I realized what I was doing. He stumbled backwards, then dropped the gun, and came at me full force, landing a hard punch to my stomach. I doubled over, then hit him with an uppercut to the jaw when he straightened from the punch. When he crashed into the desk, I dove for the gun. It was in my grasp when his body landed on top of mine, and he knocked the gun away, sending it spinning into the door. He was heavy enough that I couldn't wriggle out from underneath him. "Damn you, Mulder, let me go!" "You punched me first," he said, his breath hot on my ear. I tried to twist away, but he held me firmly. "I think this is what you've wanted all along, Alex." "Get off me, Mulder!" I growled, but my fighting instinct was weakening, my blood rushing to my groin. "I don't think so." His voice had dropped to a whisper. "How do I know you're not going to go for that gun?" "You know I'm not," I replied, helplessly, utterly embarassed. He'd won once again. "Dammit, let go!" I cried, but my voice was weak, and I cursed myself. His voice was silky in my ear. "When I've got you in a position such as this?" He chuckled. "All I have to do, Krycek, is move an inch and you'll tell me anything I want to know." And to prove his point, he ground his hips against my ass, and a groan escaped my lips before I could swallow it. "I'm right, aren't I?" He pressed harder, demanding an answer. "Aren't I?" "You're not getting anything out of me," I snapped. "This is what you've wanted from the beginning, isn't it? From the very first day you introduced yourself to me, looking like you were fresh out of the Academy. I saw the look in your eyes, Krycek. Didn't they teach you that you should never fall in love with a profiler? We can see things in people, things other agents miss." I didn't answer. Mulder ripped my shirt away partway off, tearing the white cotton. "Not your color, is it?" he asked, sarcasm dripping in his voice. "You don't look quite as sinister when you're not wearing black. Now tell me. This is what you've wanted, isn't it?" I wanted to scream out, yes, yes, it's what I've wanted from the beginning, this roughness, your hands on me, your voice harsh in my ear, demanding what I never wanted to give, but what I would only give to you. But I didn't say a word. I felt his breath on my skin a second before I felt his teeth sink into my shoulder, hard enough to draw blood. Passion tore through me, and I pressed my mouth to the floor to keep from screaming as my body tightened underneath his. Then his weight was gone, and I was laying helpless on the floor, panting. "Get out," he said harshly. "Leave. And if I see you again, it will be worse, I promise you. We've had this date for a long time, you and I, and you're not going to escape me so easily next time." I fled. Terrified, ashamed, weak, and trying to calm the storm inside of myself. For the first time, I felt as if I was no longer in control of my life, but that Fox Mulder held the reins. I bought a train ticket, my mind barely registering where it was for, and rode the train all night, trying to clear my head of images of Mulder, of the sound of his voice. Of his promise... I needed him like the desert needs water. Surviving without him for a long time, and being flooded by him when we met, but needing him nonetheless. I knew I'd go back to him, that where was no way I could stay away from him... And the train continued its journey to nowhere. I think this is the end of the series :-) Please let me know what you thought! violinst@pitnet.net - and I have some chocolate marshmallow Kryceks left... violinst@pitnet.net Site X - http://personal.pitnet.net/london