From: Lola Date: Fri, 28 Aug 2009 16:05:22 -0400 Subject: The First Time--Milagro by Lolabeegood Source: direct Title: The First Time--Milagro Author: Lolabeegood E-mail: lolabeegood@gmail.com Distribution: Archive freely with my name attached Rating: R Categories: S, R Keywords: Mulder/Scully romance, Missing Scene, Post-Episode Spoilers: Milagro Summary: To feel a burning, palpitating heart Author's Notes: There has been a lot of discussion about when Mulder & Scully first slept together and I thought I would explore that through a series of fan fiction. I am going to look at some episodes over season 6 & 7 and fit their first time into or around each one. Ellentalk_uk e-mailed me an idea that started this story--thank you so much for the suggestion and I'm glad I was able to run with it! Also, the song "I'm Running" by Mistress Barbara with Sam Roberts tied in perfectly with my ideas. In my world that would be the song Scully would be listening to on a walkman while she ran (even though it did not exist during the timeline of the story!). I have included the lyrics for anyone who wants to think about the connections. It's an amazing song. I do not own the characters or the song. I do not make any money from this. Enjoy! ************* I'm Running By Mistress Barbara with Sam Roberts I'm running in the rain On a dark and cloudy day Wondering if you'll hear What I have to say I can't seem to slow down when I worry about you And I'm running, I'm running to you I wanna see you fall so I can help you up Catch you at the bottom, push you back to the top I can't seem to slow down when I worry about you And I'm running, I'm running to you I'm running through the music Stepping on each note I'm running through the pictures Playing everyone's role I run to the top I run to the bottom And I'm running, I'm running to you Running from the fear of not knowing where to go From the question I don't ask and the answers I don't know I'm running through myself, and everybody else And I'm running, running to you So I'm running, I'm running to you I'm running 'till this world becomes a better place I'm running not to lose this human race I know I can make it when I'm holding your hand So I'm running, I'm running to you I'm running and I'm breathless but I have to go on These steps are the beat and I'm singing this song I hear you in stereo wherever you are And I'm running, running to you, to you I'm running from the past and from all my mistakes I'm running and I'm sorry if I can't stay in one place Nowhere I can go that can stop me from running And I'm running, running to you, to you I'm running 'till this world becomes a better place I'm running not to lose this human race I know I can make it when I'm holding your hand So I'm running, I'm running to you I'm running and I'm breathless but I have to go on These steps are the beat and I'm singing this song I hear you in stereo wherever you are And I'm running, running to you, to you I'm running from the past and from all my mistakes I'm running and I'm sorry if I can't say in one place Nowhere I can go that can stop me from running And I'm running, running to you, to you ***************************************** Mulder ran to his apartment as soon as he heard the gunshots. He knew at once Scully was in danger and at that moment he wished he could climb 4 flights of stairs in 2 seconds. All that poured through his mind was a chain of recent thoughts 'he couldn't have her heart, Agent Scully is already in love, he wants her palpitating heart to himself, her heart belongs to me' When he found her lying on his floor with blood all over her he felt as if his heart had been ripped from his body. Mulder rushed to her side and held her in his arms. Her reflex action of waking and being horribly frightened made him gloriously happy because it meant she was alive and still fighting. The nail breaking grip that she immediately plunged into his back made him feel undoubtedly scared because although alive, she was unhinged. Mulder remembered back to the Pfaster case and decided that this reaction was worse and he cringed at the pain this woman had been through. "Scully, Scully" he gently caressed her with his hands and his voice "it's okay, it's okay, I'm here" She sobbed loudly into his chest as he tried to wipe the hair from her face. "I need to look at your injury, I'm just going to open your blouse" he said tenderly as a hesitant hand reached to do the work necessary to open the blood-stained garment and undo her bra Her grip around his neck showed no signs of loosening as he attempted to lift her bra to look at her injury. "Scully, if you don't let go" he whispered "I can't see anything" Her sobbing continued and her grip did not waiver. Mulder needed to assess the damage immediately so he blindly felt for her chest. As embarrassed as he was to be feeling up his partner, she left him with no choice. His hand felt the smooth rise of her right breast and ran around the edge to ascertain there were no open wounds. Then he moved his hand to the centre of her chest and felt up and down her sternum. Also, no damage. He moved his hand to her left breast running it around the edge and then toward the centre, expecting to feel an open wound at some point. But there was nothing. Besides the slippery blood covering her chest and the loose lace bra hanging from her shoulders there were no signs of the wound that was causing the staining. "Scully, I can't seem to find the wound" he said exasperated "is there somewhere else I should check?" She shook her head violently 'no' and lay back down against the floor with a 'thump' as her body started to shiver. "Oh, shit" Mulder said as he reached to feel her head. She was running a temperature, her teeth were chattering, and her eyes were rolling back. Mulder grabbed for the nearest blanket and wrapped her in a tight cocoon and ran his hands up and down her body in an attempt to stop the shivering. Luckily, his neighbors had called the police when the shots were fired and the medics arrived quickly and swooped her off to the hospital with him trailing next to her relaying medical history. The medics managed to control her shivering in the ambulance and the doctors brought down her fever quickly at the hospital. As far as any tests, scans, or x-rays showed she had no visible injuries. The blood on her blouse was tested and found to be hers but how it got there no one could explain. The next day she was released from the hospital and she went to stay with her mom for a few days to rest. Mulder called everyday and was shocked when on the second day, her mother said she had gone for a run. He knew she was in perfect health physically but mentally, he thought she would take some more time to rest. He figured it was a good sign. When she returned to work she was distant, a little short with him, and she always seemed tired. For days their office existence went on with her coming in a little later than usual, going off by herself at lunch, and leaving exactly at 5 pm with nary a goodbye to him. Mulder was concerned that his examination of her after the attack had embarrassed her and made her want to avoid him. He was also concerned she wasn't sleeping which was why she always seemed to be dragging herself around. One day at lunch, as she was preparing to escape again he decided to address the issue. "Hey Scully, how about you let me treat you to lunch today?" "Thanks Mulder, but I'm good" she said as she reached for her bag "Come on, I miss you chastising my lunch choices" he smirked "Well, maybe if you ate a little healthier, I wouldn't have a reason to be critical. You know your heart," she started "So lunch?" he interrupted, hopeful "Sorry, Mulder. I have plans" she countered as she started to walk from the room "If this is about feeling you up," he started "I only did it to make sure you didn't have any major injuries" "What?" she asked confused "Feeling your breasts" he said as he motioned with his two hands fingers outstretched palms facing her making huge dial turning motions "Oh, god Mulder" she laughed "I haven't even thought about that" "Are you sure? Because you've been acting really distant" "No Mulder, I've been acting normal. Maybe you are projecting a whole uncomfortable situation onto this" she said as she reached the door "Are we done now?" "Yeah, I guess we are" he said as he watched her walk from the office Mulder knew there was more to this then she was letting on. He decided after work tonight he'd do some surveillance work. She'd kill him if she knew, but he had to see what was going on. She left work at 5pm and was nice enough to wish him a good evening as she scurried out. He waited a minute and then followed her from the building back to her apartment. She went inside and Mulder settled in for a long evening in a cramped car. He was surprised when she reappeared thirty minutes later dressed for exercise. She stretched outside her building and then took off for a run. He cautiously followed her to the park and then turned back to wait for her return. She was gone about 40 minutes and on her return run he noticed her muscles slogging and her chest heaving. She was spent; she must have done a flat out run. She did some stretches and again went inside. Lights flicked on in her apartment as she cleaned up and had supper. Mulder was immersed in an article on apparitions when he noticed she appeared again at about 9pm, dressed in sweats, with her walkman, and stretching for a run. Two runs in one night seemed a little excessive but maybe she was on some sort of training regime he didn't know about. She was headed for the park again and he didn't even bother to follow her knowing she'd be back in a half hour or so. She returned almost an hour later just as Mulder was starting to chastise himself for not following her. She was sweaty and obviously wiped out. She sat on her front porch for a good 10 minutes just breathing and gulping back water. Mulder was tempted to get out of the car and say he had stopped by for some reason but he was sure he wasn't ready to give up his surveillance. She went inside and within 20 minutes the lights were out for the night. Mulder went back to his article and when he tried to read he had trouble focusing. What if she was part of some running group and had met someone? Maybe that was why she was so focused on fitness? Maybe she was meeting him in the park for a nightly run? Maybe running man was the person Scully was in love with? Mulder chastised himself for the audacity of thinking it was him she was in love with. Maybe there was someone else in the picture? He couldn't sleep that night. Not only because of the uncomfortable situation in the car but because thoughts of a possible love affair with running man kept him awake. Maybe she was meeting him for lunch as well? Maybe there was more than one man? At 7 am when Scully's lights went on again he had already worked out a possible scenario. Scully was meeting running man for nightly jog-dates and either spending her lunch hours with him, or using the time to make clandestine phone calls to him out of Mulder's earshot. He was at least glad that Scully didn't have running man sleep over after their dates. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat when she appeared fifteen minutes later in running gear and stretching in front of her building. Mulder was shocked at her stamina and a little freaked out by the relentless nature of her running. He ran regularly and knew of the 'high' one received but Scully seemed a little like an addict. Either that, or someone with a body image obsession. When she took off down the street he started his car and went home to shower and change. That morning she beat him to the office for the first time in over a week. He had a plan to follow her this lunch hour and find out what was really going on. Lunch came and she left quickly with her bag in hand. Mulder followed her at a safe distance through the halls of the Hoover to the ladies washroom just outside the parking garage. She emerged five minutes later in jogging gear and placed her bag in the trunk of her car before leaving for her run. Mulder was not prepared for this scenario and lost her one block from the Hoover building. He watched as her sleek form ran down the street dodging walkers and buggies and disappeared around a corner. That night after work he stopped off at home to change into his running gear before heading to her apartment. He was late to catch her after work jog because she ran back from it about 10 minutes after he got there. The late evening one was the run he was most interested in because, he believed, there was a man involved. Just before 9 pm she appeared again and Mulder was sure she was wearing more revealing jogging clothing than for the earlier run. She stretched and took off toward the park. When Mulder started his run he didn't have time to stretch. As a result, his muscles screamed as he hit the hill at the edge of the park as she rounded over the top of it. He was keeping a safe distance to ensure she wasn't spotting him. She ran for a good 60 minutes and did about 10 miles by his estimation. There was no man, there was no stopping, and there was no slowing. She went all out. Mulder's mind reeled. Why was she doing this to herself? Was she training for a marathon? Her methods would only lead to physical exhaustion. Did she have a disorder-- anorexia, bulimia? Was she obsessed with body image and he hadn't noticed? No. He was sure these changes were recent. Mulder was so engrossed in his thoughts that he almost ran past her building as she stood there stretching. "Mulder" she said perplexed "what the hell are you doing here?" He stopped quickly and pivoted on his heel looking at her dead on and not saying anything. "Are you, are you following me?" she asked between pants He walked towards her "Scully, what the hell are you doing to yourself?" "What?" "You know what I'm saying. All this, this,running. What's going on?" "You're following me?" she shouted "Why the hell are you following me Mulder?" "Because I was concerned. Now, answer my question." "I don't owe you any answers" she said as she placed a foot on a stair to go inside "Yes, yes you do. Is it an eating disorder? We can get help Scully" he said as he held her in place by grasping her arm "I do not have an eating disorder!" she said indignantly facing him directly from one step up"Then what the fuck is all this?" he shouted She pulled her arm away from his grasp "Go home Mulder" "Scully!" he exclaimed "this is not normal" "Nothing in my life is normal Mulder, why should this surprise you!" she shouted, leaning into his space "Why are you running four times a day, all out, and exhausting yourself?" he asked sharply "Because of this" she said as she grasped his hand and held it to her chest with her palm on top of his He could feel her heart racing beneath her sweaty skin and his equally sweaty palm. He gasped at her with an open mouth, unsure of what to say. "Because I need to feel it beat in my chest, my chest Mulder." She emphasized "Because he tried to take it from me and,and it's mine Mulder. And I need to feel alive again. Running reminds me I still have a heart beating inside of me no matter how much I shut it down everyday" They stood there for a moment with his hand still clasped to her chest starring at one another. "How do you shut it down everyday?" he asked softly She swallowed hard and looked at her feet for a moment before raising her eyes to meet his again. "I promised myself I would be thankful everyday that I was still alive from now on." She started self-consciously "That I would decide to live instead of hiding from things all the time." He nodded at her words. "I hide from my feelings for you Mulder. I bury them deep inside of me so I don't have to deal with them. I'm sick of hiding from myself Mulder" she said with teary eyes "Then don't" he said with tenderness "How? I've gotten really good at it" she chastised herself as she wiped a tear that fell He leaned forward and tenderly kissed her lips, still feeling her heart race under his palm. His other arm grasped around her waist and pulled her toward him so she was pressed up against his sweaty body. He kissed her as their bodies reflexively and subtly rubbed back and forth against each other. He pulled back from the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers "You better either invite me in or send me packing because we're giving your neighbors quite a show" "Come on in, Mulder" she grinned as she turned to walk up more stairs He followed her inside and found himself getting more and more nervous with each step. He knew he needed a shower before he was putting any body part closer to her but, he didn't want to kill the mood with a need for a shower. He would let Scully take the lead and decide how they were going to do things tonight. As she unlocked her door Mulder found himself leaning into her and kissing the back of her exposed neck as he ran a hand up and down the side of her torso. Scully leaned into the kisses and seemed to take longer than usual to unlatch the door. Once inside she started to kiss him back maneuvering her hands precisely over his torso and ridding him of his sweaty tank top. He followed her lead, and removed her tank top bra to expose her moist, glistening breasts. Immediately, his hands went to them like Velcro and stayed in massaging position for quite some time as they made out against her kitchen counter."We need to get clean Mulder" she said between kisses "we're both covered in sweat" "You go first, I can wait" he said gallantly "Huh?" she asked confused "It's okay Scully, you go first and I'll wait" he murmured as he planted soft kisses on her salty collarbone "Uh, there's room for two" she said as a blush ran up her chest and onto her face Mulder smiled from ear to ear, "what are we waiting for?" He walked her quickly to her washroom and proceeded to run the shower water searching for the right temperature as she undressed behind him. When he turned she was standing with a bright blue towel around her and a red color to her skin. He pulled free his running shorts, socks and shoes and approached her slowly grabbing the knot of the towel with his hands. "We can loose this" he said as he undid the knot and let her towel fall to the floor She shifted uncomfortably on her feet as his eyes never wavered from hers. Their naked bodies were mere inches apart and one part of Mulder's body was trying to bridge the gap. "Come on Scully, let me soap you up" he said as he nodded his head toward the running shower She walked in front of him and he admired the view of her perfect white ass as it stepped into the shower stall. He followed her quickly and immediately liked the close quarters of the shower. They were forced to rub up against each other while the water made their bodies' slicker. Mulder took the time to put some fruity shampoo in the palm of his hand and massage it slowly into her scalp. She seemed to relish in the massage and he loved the sensual look that accompanied it. He followed the rinse with a lingering cleaning of all the major parts of her body. When he got to her vagina he spent several minutes drawing tight circles within her folds and putting pressure on her clit with his thumb. "Ohhh, Mulder" she moaned as her ass rubbed up against him "You like that huh?" He whispered "Too much" she snickered "get inside of me" With that request Mulder hunched down and she pushed her ass out to get the perfect angle. When he entered her it was smooth and slick. Her vaginal walls were tight, yet accepting. She braced her arms against the shower wall as Mulder ploughed into her time and time again. Although they were both exhausted from the run and the steam was starting to make him feel light-headed Mulder persisted in taking her to orgasm. "Ohhh, god Mulder, yes!" she cried as she came and shuddered around him He smiled at the result and continued to plunge into her and smack his balls up against her tight ass until he exploded within her and gasped "Scully, you feel soo amazing" as he held her around the waist to keep them both from falling over. He released her waist and stepped back from her grabbing the shower wall for support. She stood with her back still to him and her arms still leaning against the wall for s upport. "Scully, are you okay?" he asked concerned "Just a little, a little dizzy that's all" she gasped "Come with me" he said grabbing her hand and walking her out of the shower stall. He wrapped her in the discarded blue towel that was lying on the floor and quickly grabbed another towel to wrap around his waist. He walked her to her bed and helped her lay down under the covers. "I'm getting you some water and something to eat" he said as she walked out of the room "Mulder, I'm fine. It's just with all the running," she began "You've exhausted yourself" he said as he returned with her water and some crackers "you can't keep running like his Scully, it's not good for you" "I know" she agreed "But do you understand why I did it?" "Yeah, I do. But, running isn't the only way to feel alive. You know that" he said sitting next to her "I do" she murmured as her hand came to rest over his knee "Back to one run a day?" he asked as she sipped her water "I know, one run a day" "And I promise to help you feel alive in other ways" he said as he waggled his eyebrows at her Scully laughed loudly. "You know, I love you Scully" he chuckled "Yeah, I know, Mulder." She smiled "I was just too scared to admit it" Mulder climbed into bed next to her and got under the covers. He sat with her as she ate her crackers and drank her water. They fell asleep quickly afterwards and the next morning, there was no 7 am run. *************************************** The End