From: Roy & Vered Friedman Date: Tue, 09 May 2000 19:56:08 +0200 Subject: xfc: NEW: "Free?" (1 of 1) Source: xfc Title: Free? Author: Vered Gilad-Friedman (royvered@netvision.net.il) Category: V Spoilers: "Closure" Summary: Scully's reaction to Mulder's words: "I'm free." Disclaimer: All characters are not mine, but belong to FOX & 1013. I intended no copyright infringement and will not earn any money from this story. Feedback: Please send all feedback you can. I, like all authors, I truly need it. You don't know how much. --------------------------------------------------------- FREE? ~~~~~ by: Vered Gilad-Friedman I look at the guy sitting beside me. I'm not sure he's the same guy I've known for the last six or so years. This guy who would drive mountains insane, is suddenly content? He's... free? I don't even know how to take this. It's as if all of a sudden not only his life had been turned around, but mine as well. I was sucked into his quest for his sister. It had changed my life completely, and now, with him content, should I feel content too? I know that the right thing to do is to accept what had just happened. At least I suppose it's the right thing. I have longed for the day when I would see Mulder so calm and at peace with his feelings, and yet, somehow I feel it is wrong. I know it's the skeptic in me feeling this way. I try to shoo her away. To explain to myself that as long as he's happy, then that's how things should be. How many more years should he suffer while searching endlessly for his sister? If there's one thing that should finally rest in peace, it's Mulder's soul. It's obvious that Samantha is not coming back. A man should not put his life on hold for so many years like Mulder had done. It's better that he find satisfaction now than never. But I can't let go of that nagging feeling that this is just not right. And why is it not right? The irony of things is that by now I guess I can accept alien abduction as a far more plausible explanation than... walk-ins. I know it's because I did not see what Mulder had seen. But somehow I feel that he was deceived. I don't know by what, but it's the fact that he accepted Samantha as dead without so much as a shred of tangible proof that bothers me a great deal. It's almost as if he'd given up before it was truly time to do so. But do I voice these feelings of mine and take the chance that I would destroy the calm that had finally come to rest on my partner's face? Do I risk falling into an argument over this? Is this a tremendously important issue I should not let go of? I know it's important, but is this worth ruining Mulder's soul? I look at him again. He hasn't spoken much since we'd left the scene. But I can tell that he's happy. The stiffness in his shoulders, which had been following him on so many of the cases we'd worked on, is gone. There's no tension to be found in his body. If only I could feel the same. I'm all aches and cramps and discomfort. No. I cannot do this to him. Even if it may sound right. It's only something I want to do for my own sake. But for Mulder's sake, for his soul's sake, I will keep my quiet, and keep him free. ****** THE END ****** >-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-< Directory to all my sites (backgrounds, fanfic, XF gallery) http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Set/2571/director.htm >-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-< "If you want to know who you are, it's important to know who you've been" - Jadzia Dax, "Equilibrium" "I was just here. Where did I go?" - Fox Mulder "Small Potatoes" "There's no other thing unnerving for men than talking about feelings" - Benton Fraser "Due South" "I always wanted breakfast in boot" - Hawkeye Pierce, MASH