From: "Amanda Shedden" Date: Wed, 13 Feb 2002 21:50:56 +0000 Subject: story Source: direct Title: Fun With Super Glue Author: Bonkers Bostonian Rating: PG-13 Category: Mulder/Scully friendship Spoilers: None, I think... Distribution: Anywhere and Everywhere, just let me know. Disclaimer: They'd be having A LOT more fun if they were mine. AND I'd be living on some tropical island sipping one of those Hawaiian drinks with the umbrella in it. Feedback: If you feel the need to e-mail me, feel free. I will only answer it, however, if it says nice things. Thanks: To ME, MYSELF, and I. (Thought I was gonna write Irene didn't ya?) Just kidding. Thanks to Maya and Leslie for giving me SOMETHING to keep me out of trouble. And To Jenna who sadly couldn't come up this weekend cause my mother's being a B*$#%. WE LOVE YOU JENNA!!! Summary: I think the title says it all. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~HERE WE GO~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Scully sat at her kitchen table staring off into space. It had been 2 hours and she still couldn't think of a thing to write to her brother Charlie in Florida. I'm fine, works ok, and no I don't have a boyfriend had been used to many times before. About all she had written was "Dear Charlie." Oh well, she thought, might as well get it over with so I can mail it. 5 minutes later she was done and writing his address on the front of the envelope. That's when she noticed she was out of stamps. "Damnit" she said, and headed for the door. On the way she picked up her car keys, and sunglasses. "You've got mail" the computer stated mater of factly. So, being the extremely pissed off person she was, she quickly walked up to the computer and shut it off. Then stormed out of her apartment. She didn't know why she was so aggravated. It was probably because she had to drive all the way to the other end of the city to the post office just to buy the stamps that she should have had the sense to buy in the grocery store last Saturday. And, it was rush hour. How fun. A half an hour later she was parking in the parking lot. The whole way here she had to drive behind a car filled with overexcited N'Sync fans, who were obviously on their way to the concert because they had the music up so loud it was giving her a headache. Even with her windows up. Personally she was a Backstreet Boys fan. But that was her little secret. She walked briskly into the Post office and got in line for stamps. 10 minutes later she had reached the counter. "Can I have a roll of stamps please." She asked politely. "Hey sweetheart, are you sure there isn't anything else I could do for you?" The guy asked practically drooling at her. "Yeah, you can give me my friggan stamps. Now." She demanded. "Come on baby, why don't I pick you up at your place, say around 7:00pm. We could..." She cut him off abruptly. "Baby me and you'll be peeing through a catheter. I'm a federal agent and if you even look at me the wrong way I will throw your ass in prison for attempted assault." "Ye...ye...yes ma'am" he stuttered and handed her the stamps. She paid him and stepped out of line. To her surprise she was being applauded by the people in line behind her. She smiled and walked towards the mail drop off slot. She attached a stamp to the letter and dropped it in. That finally done she headed out to her car and drove home. Later that night, after she had finished dinner, she received a very odd phone call from Mulder. All he would say was that he needed her help desperately. And he sounded drunk to boot. So being the dutiful partner and friend she raced over to his place to see what he had gotten himself into this time. Course, with Mulder, things always seemed to be worse then they appeared. When she arrived at his door she raised her hand to knock but instead was dragged into the apartment and sat on the couch. All in the space of about 5 seconds. "Mulder what the..." she was silenced by the look on his face. It was that "just let me explain before you yell at me and threaten to shoot me in the head" look he adopted when about to approach her with a perspective x-file. He was dressed in his black drawstring pants and that gray T-shirt he always wears. He had one hand at his side and one on the side of his face. Like he had rested his head on it, yet forgot to take it away when he got up. "Ssscully, I did sometin stubid." He said in a drunkin haze. "I...I...I was sittin on da toiwet twying to superglue..." "Oh no." "...my toohbrush holder back on da wall, and I...um...spilled some glue on da sink..." "Please tell me your not going say what I think your going say." "...and I twied to wipe it up with my hand...and den I rewised dat dat wuz really subid and I hit myself on the face wit da hand an it stuck." He stumbled forward and landed on his knees on the floor with a loud thump. He stared up at her with pleading eyes. "Mulder, why are you drunk?" She said slowly, letting him comprehend each word as she said it. "We...we...well I called u allll aftanoon an you weren't dare. So I...I..." He trailed off, forgetting what he was going to say. "Well, it's off to the hospital for you." She stated firmly. Leaving no room for arguing. Some time later Scully was sitting in the waiting room waiting for the doctor to emerge with Mulder's prognosis. Next to her was a Mother and daughter. The Mother was reading a "Better Homes and Gardens" magazine. While the daughter, who looked to be only 5 years old, was coloring a "Winnie the Pooh" coloring book. Scully smiled sadly to herself, and looked back down at the magazine she was flipping through. It was a "Rollingstones" magazine. With a picture of a band called "Hanson" on the cover. Scully had never heard of them, but immediately disliked them. For they looked like girls. Though it said they were brothers. Frustrated at how long it was taking Mulder to comeout of the doctors' office, she closed the magazine and tossed it onto the table beside her. She looked up and, of course, Mulder was standing there with an odd expression on his face. Wait, backtrack, his face looked completely normal. Damn those doctors were good. "Mulder you look much better." "Yeah, my face still kinda stings but at least I can move that part of it now." "And you sound somewhat sober. What kind of treatment did you receive?" "The doctor gave me some kind of special cream that he rubbed over the glue. In no time it was all gone. Off my face that is. I still have to put some on my hand for the next day or so." "Can I see your hand?" "I guess." He pulled his right hand out from behind his back and turned it palm up. The skin was red and aggravated, and there were patches of glue still stuck fast. "It doesn't look that bad Mulder. Oh well at least now you know better. Come on I'll take you home." The drive home was comfortably quiet. When they had reached his apartment Scully remembered that she had left her sunglasses on his desk. So she accompanied him upstairs. Once the sunglasses were acquired, and she was on her way out, she thought to herself, what the hell might as well see where this entire incident occurred. "Where are you going Scully?" Mulder asked a little nervous. "I'm going to look at your handy work." She stated with a smile. "Ha ha" Scully headed through Mulder's bedroom and arrived at the doorway to his bathroom. "Good work Agent Mulder" "This is just SO funny to you isn't it?" "Yes, yes it is." Scully scanned the inside of the bathroom with a practiced eye. Leaving no detail uncatalouged. The super glue container was lying on its side; glue had oozed out of it and was now stuck to the sink top. The cabinet door was ajar, and its contents were strewn about the room. "You know Mulder, except for the glue, this room looks pretty much the same as it always does." "Gee Scully," he said standing in the doorway, "You're getting wittier in your old age." Scully gave him 'the look' and started to walk out when she realized that, while surveying the room she had put her hand down on a sticky patch of glue. "Oh for Christ's sake." She spat out. "Kodak moment." "Thank god you haven't been able to find your camera in 2 years." "Well, Ms. Scully if your gonna be like that you don't get to use my medication." He stated and pulled it from the pocket of his jeans. "Come on Mulder." She pleaded reaching for the tube in his hand. He put on his sly fox grin, "Why should I?" "Because if you don't I'll show the entire bureau the picture of you dressed up as Barney the dinosaur." "SCULLY!" He yelled. "You wouldn't!" "Oh wouldn't I?" "Scully please don't." He pleaded "It's not MY fault you lost at the racing game at Funspot with the Gunmen. But..." "What? I'll do anything." "If you give me the cream I might just forget I have that picture..." "Might?" "Mulder" "Ok, ok, here." He handed her the cream. She looked at him and took it out of his hand and used it on herself. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~THE END~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Leslie made me write this. She gave me a list of requirements that HAD to be in the story. AND I had to make it a drama. Well this is as dramatic as it gets for me. Here's the list. 1. Hanson 2. Backstreet Boys 3. N'Sync 4. Winnie the Pooh 5. E-mail 6. Barney the dinosour 7. Man hitting on Scully in post office 8. Mulder has to end up glued to himself 9. Toilet 10. One has to be drunk 11. And it must end with this sentence: "And she looked at him and took it out of his hands and used it herself." Don't worry; I got her back for this. I gave HER a list. I thought up a word for every letter of the alphabet. And ALL of the words HAVE to be in the fanfic. AND it also has to be a drama. Hee hee. Have fun Lez!!