From: mimic117@yahoo.com
Date: Tue, 30 Nov 2004 16:07:23 -0500
Subject: NEW:  Gender Bent  1/1
Source: direct

Title: Gender Bent

Author:  mimic117

Email:  mimic117@yahoo.com

Rating:  NC-17

Spoilers:  Mid-Gender Bender - written for the Fandomonium 
Virtual Season of Smut Challenge

Setting:  Between the time they're run off the Kindred farm until 
the next scene where they're sitting in the car, drinking coffee.

Summary:  Brother Andrew's touch lingers on.

Archive:  I'll do Gossamer and Ephemeral myself.  Anyone else 
who wants it is free to filch at will.

Disclaimer:  Not mine, never will be, but I wish I'd had them 
back in the day.  The series would have been a lot different.

Thanks:  To Cin for snake-strike-quick beta, a discerning eye 
and laughter in all the right places.  You're very good for my 
ego.

Feedback is printed out, fawned over and stroked to tatters at
mimic117@yahoo.com

Visit all my fics at the little home that XochiLuvr built.
http://www.mimicsmusings.com
Your depravity levels may vary.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gender Bent
by mimic117


Kindred farm
Steveston, Masschusetts

Mulder stumbled over a tree root and nearly fell -- again.  It 
took every bit of dexterity he possessed to remain upright on 
the rain-slick leaves.  If Scully hadn't been tucked under his 
arm, helping him to balance, they'd both have ended up on the 
ground a long time ago.  

He shifted his arm around her shoulders and got a better grip.  
She was still pretty out of it after being sick and he was 
hoping to see the car soon.  Half-dragging his partner through 
the dark, wet forest hadn't exactly been on his schedule for the 
evening.

The Kindred had made their feelings very clear back at the 
farmhouse.  It was a good thing they were a non-violent cult.  
Mulder still wanted to know what Brother Andrew had done to 
Scully, but he figured it wasn't worth the potential 
unpleasantness to stick around and demand answers.  He 
would get her to a hospital as soon as possible and have her 
checked out.  

"Mmmm..."  Scully pulled away from his support.  It was the 
first response she'd shown since he'd gathered her up in his 
arms and hustled her down the path.

Was she going to be sick again?  

Her eyes still looked glazed over, but she was glancing around, 
taking in their surroundings.  

"You feeling better now?" he asked.  

It took a moment, but her eyes finally tracked upward to his 
face.  It looked like she was staring at his lips, but maybe she 
was just too tired to tilt her head back farther.

"Mmmmm..." 

He waited, but she didn't say anything else.  Her gaze was 
locked so intently on his mouth, Mulder wondered if he had 
mud on his skin.  He nonchalantly swiped his hand across his 
lips, but there was nothing unusual there.  

He was just about to start walking again when Scully's fingers 
began burrowing between the buttons on his shirt.  She popped 
the button above her hand and reached inside farther.  She 
didn't seem to still be shaken after her mauling, but maybe she 
needed his warmth as reassurance.  

He could give her this.  They were friends.  They supported and 
comforted each other.  He wouldn't let himself get turned on by 
the scratch of her nails around his navel.  He wasn't going to 
think about her hand caressing hot circles on his abdomen.  
Keeping a lookout for possible danger would take his mind off 
the fact that her fingers were digging under his waistband.

What the hell?

Scully was not only headed where no one had been in a long 
time, but he suddenly realized that she was rubbing against 
him in a very suggestive manner.  Apparently she was looking 
for something more than a little comfort.

He tried to pull away but her hand was firmly wedged under his 
belt.  "Whoa, Scully!  Isn't that getting a bit personal?"

"Mmmmmm...."  Her other hand reached for his zipper.  He 
grabbed it and held on, trying to regain some control of the 
situation.

This wasn't like Scully at all.  The woman he'd been working 
with all year wouldn't allow herself this kind of familiarity 
unless she wasn't in her right mind.  She was alive because 
he'd rescued her from Brother Andrew before they did the 
mattress mambo.  But what were the residual effects of the 
Kindred's touch?  So far, everybody who might have come in 
contact with one of their people had died.  Did breaking the 
connection leave residual pheromones in the system?   Was Scully 
still under the influence of the Kindred aphrodisiac?  

It looked like the answer to that question was "yes."  The 
fingers inside his shirt wriggled under his belt, trying to 
reach lower.

She licked her lips and Mulder noticed that she was panting.  
Well, so was he for that matter.  He was male, and in the hands 
of a beautiful woman who appeared to have carnal designs on 
his body.  Gentlemanly intentions weren't going to be enough 
to keep the south from rising anymore.  The best he could do 
was to get them back to the car and out of the elements.  
Maybe he could figure out a way to deal with the situation once 
they weren't in the open, being drenched by the dripping trees.

He directed her captive hand to the outside of his shirt and got 
them started walking again.  She struggled for a moment until 
she found that she could still touch him and move.  It was 
awkward, but at least they were in motion.  

"Come on, Scully.  The car can't be far away now."  

Mulder hoped he was telling the truth.  He wasn't completely 
sure they were on the right path, but it was the only one he 
could see in the watery light under the trees.  

Since he was now occupied by trying to keep them moving, 
Scully was having more success evading his hands.  When he 
stumbled and let her go, she managed to get his belt unbuckled 
and the zipper lowered.  He pulled her other hand out of his 
shirt before she could take advantage of the looser fit.  She 
mewled in protest, let go of his zipper, and switched hands so 
she could jam one down the back of his pants.

Great.  She was groping his ass.  He might as well stop 
pretending that this wasn't turning him on.

Thank goodness the waistband of his pants was still fastened 
or they'd be down around his knees.  He prayed he could find 
the car before she managed to get a hand inside his fly.  The 
fact that he was walking faster had deflected her attempts so 
far, but she still seemed pretty determined to feel him up.  

Those Kindred cooties really packed a wallop.

After a few more minutes of skidding on the leaf-strewn ground, 
Mulder saw light glinting off metal up ahead.

Hallelujah!  The car at last.  He breathed a sigh of relief only 
to suck it back in again as Scully dove for his pants button.  
He headed her off just in time.  

"Look, Scully," he said in the kind of voice parents use to 
distract unruly toddlers.  "There's the car.  Let's get inside 
where it's dry.  Okay?"

She hummed in reply but didn't stop kneading his ass while he 
hustled her over to the waiting vehicle.  He debated between 
putting her in the front or rear seat while he tried to fish the 
keys from his pocket without giving her another shot at his fly.  
By the time he had the keys in his hand, he'd decided on the 
front seat because he could not only use the seat belt to strap 
her in place, he could keep an eye on her.  He wouldn't be able 
to see what she was doing in the back and he didn't need the 
added suspense of waiting for her to break free and jump him.  
Granted, lashing her to the front seat might not stop her, either, 
but it offered better odds.  He only knew there was no way he 
could drive back to town if she kept trying to palm his package.

It wasn't easy to get the car door open with Scully clinging to 
him like a wet leaf, but he managed.  She whimpered in protest 
again when he pulled her hand out of the back of his pants and 
pushed her away.  She kept trying to grab his crotch as he 
steered her into the passenger seat and sat her down.  The 
next part was going to be a little tricky.  He either had to lean 
over her and lock the seatbelt in, or get in himself and then 
lean across her to snag the belt from inside the car.  He opted 
to pull the strap all the way out with one hand and hook it over 
the gear shift while swatting her marauding fingers away with the 
other.  He'd belt her in as soon as he tucked all her limbs into 
the car and shut the door.

It only took him a moment to run around to the driver's side and 
climb in.  She was already straining toward him and managed 
to get one hand beneath his butt as he sat down.  He pulled it 
out from under him and pushed her upright with his shoulder.  
Then he used the other hand to snap the seatbelt into the lock.  

"Awwww."  Her face crumpled into a frown and her chin 
quivered as if she were going to cry.  

He leaned away from her as she tried in vain to touch him.  The 
belt kept locking up every time she lunged against it and there 
wasn't enough slack to let her do more than scrabble at his 
shoulder or leg.  He wasn't fooled by her inability to reach him, 
though.  She was evidently still so befuddled by whatever was 
in her bloodstream that it hadn't dawned on her to simply 
unlock the seatbelt.  She wasn't capable of thinking beyond her 
own pressing need at the moment.  But he had every 
confidence in her ability to work through any puzzle, even when 
tanked up on super-strength pheromones.  She'd figure it out 
eventually.

It wasn't long before she stopped struggling and flopped back 
into her seat.  The sound of fabric against fabric was loud in 
the car as she rubbed her legs together and twisted fitfully.  
"MmmmmMulder..."  It was half moan, half sigh and the sexiest 
thing he'd ever heard her say.

Had she been trying to say his name all this time?  The 
possibility made his dick jump.  He adjusted his crotch as 
unobtrusively as possible but her eyes still followed the 
movement of his fingers.  She licked her lips and he had to 
stifle the urge to readjust.

What should he do?  *Should* he do anything?  Her condition 
was obviously a result of the Kindred's touch, but how long 
would it last?  Did she just need to wait it out?  From the look 
of things, she'd have a long wait.  Did she *need* to have sex to 
clear it out of her system?  That made sense based on what 
they knew of the previous victims, but he couldn't even 
consider it.  They were partners, not lovers, no matter how 
often the thought had crossed his mind recently.  He respected 
Scully too much to take advantage of her in this condition.  

And what if he didn't?  Would she continue to grope him all the 
way back to their motel?  Would she jump the first pimply kid 
she saw on the street?  

It seemed like a good bet considering the fact that she hadn't 
stopped writhing and moaning since he'd put her in the car.  
She kept rubbing her hands over her own body but couldn't 
seem to attain any relief.  If he took her back to town like this, 
he had a pretty good idea what would happen the minute the 
car door opened.

He needed to do *something*.  Since they couldn't have regular 
sex, then he'd have to be creative.  

Oral sex?  Too intimate.  If she remembered anything about 
this, she'd be mortified to know his face had been between her 
legs.  

What else?  Since flat-out sex wasn't a consideration, that only 
left his -- his hands.

Yeah.  He could jack her off.  

Mulder felt his cock swell from the mental image that conjured 
up -- his hands down her pants, her sweet face twisted in 
ecstasy, his name rasping from her lips as she came.  

No!  This wasn't going to work if he let his fantasies run 
rampant.  He needed to distance himself.  He couldn't be 
permitted to derive any personal gratification from the situation.  
This wasn't for his own perverted pleasure.  He was simply 
giving a friend a hand.  

Shit.  Bad choice of words.  Manual stimulation.  That's what 
Scully would call it.  She'd do the same thing for him if their 
positions were reversed.  Wouldn't she?

The thought of her sliding his hard dick between her soft hands 
was almost too much for him.  He didn't know if he'd be able to 
do this without coming in his pants.  That would take care of his 
rapidly-increasing problem, but still....

Distance.  Distance.  Focus on creating distance.  He wasn't 
making love to her, he was helping out.  It was no different than 
holding her hair back when she was being sick outside the 
farmhouse.  Well, maybe a *little* different.  Maybe a lot 
different, actually, but if he could think of it as a medical 
procedure, he'd be okay.  Concentrate on providing effective 
treatment in order to promote a proper cure.  

Mulder sighed.  The cure going to hurt him more than it did her.

His mind made up, he would approach the task with a 
dispassionate eye, like any new case.  Study the situation, 
identify the most critical elements and determine a plan of 
action.  

First element -- Scully was sitting on the area he needed to 
access.  Well, that was easy enough to fix.  

He exited the car, leaving the door ajar, and hurried around to 
the passenger side.  She was staring at his vacant spot when 
he opened her door and hit the level to recline the seat 
cushion.  Scully flopped flat on her back with a startled "Oops!"  
Mulder was already climbing into the driver's side by the time 
she'd caught on to his actions and turned to her closed door.

Okay.  Plan of action -- get the best angle to do the job.  

He thought about it for a moment, trying to visualize how his 
fingers would be positioned, considering the possibility of 
muscle cramp if it took a while to flush all the sexed-up bugs 
from her system.  He finally settled on reclining his own seat 
slightly so he could watch her face for clues to guide him 
without having to bend backwards.  Using his right hand would 
probably be most comfortable.  The angle would allow him to 
slide his palm flat on her abdomen while affording his fingers 
the best position for maximum contact.  The left hand would 
venture nowhere near his crotch, or any parts adjacent thereto, 
I solemnly swear, never happen, no way, no how.  

And why did all this calm, cool deliberation make him feel like a 
slobbering, trench-coat-wearing flasher?

"Mmm.  MmmmmMulder..."  

Because he was going to manually stimulate his lovely, 
intelligent, sexy partner until she either recovered from 
whatever was ailing her, or until his arm fell off.  And the 
longer he sat, trying to pretend he wasn't going to do what he 
was going to do, the longer she continued to suffer from the 
effects of the ailment.  

Just get on with it.

He popped the side lever on his seat and tilted back three 
clicks.  He leaned toward the middle of the car and reached for 
the waistband of her pants.  He opened the button and gingerly 
slid the zipper down, teasing the sides of her slacks apart as 
much as he could and pulling her blouse out of the way.  When 
his fingers brushed the bare skin of her stomach, Scully arched 
high out of her seat, crying a startled "AH!" into the humid air 
of the car.

God!  Mulder jumped back and banged his elbow on the door 
handle.  His heart pounded in his throat as she slowly settled 
down again.  

Apparently she was hyper-sensitive.  Maybe that wasn't a 
completely bad thing.  She might be able to rid herself of the 
Kindred toxin more easily once he was able to touch her in the 
right place.  But he would have to stop trying to be gentle.  Any 
touch at all was going to set her off, so he might as well move 
quickly and get it over with.  He'd prefer not to grope around 
inside her pants, though.  Having the sights and sounds of this 
night locked in his head was going to be bad enough without 
the sense memory of her curls against his fingers, too.  
Between the slacks and the panties -- that was as far as he'd 
go.  Lord forgive him for even doing that.  

He extended his hand over her body again, hovering close but 
taking care not to touch her.  A deep, steadying breath and he 
was as ready as he was going to be.  

It was now or never.  

Fast as a striking snake, he plunged his hand inside her pants, 
skirting over the elastic of her underwear and down between 
her legs.  He cupped his fingers around her as she reared up in 
the seat, mouth open on a silent scream, eyes huge, shocked, 
breath coming in gulping gasps.  There was a strange sound in 
the air, a sibilant "shhh, shhh" that appeared to calm her.  She 
laid back down, accepting the touch of his hand in her most 
intimate place.  It took Mulder a moment to realize the noise he 
heard was coming from him.  In spite of his desperate search 
for clinical detachment, his brain still sought to provide 
comfort.

Her trust could catch him unaware at the strangest times.  Even 
after succumbing to who-knows-what kind of chemical reaction, 
she continued to count on him to watch out for her.

He'd try to make sure she never regretted it.

Slowly, carefully, Mulder began to move his hand, allowing her 
to adjust to the sensations.  He didn't want to drag it out any 
longer than needed, but he also didn't want to seem indifferent 
to her sensitivity.  Gradually, he increased the movement of his 
fingers, pressing down with the heel of his hand, crooking his 
palm and scratching with his nails.  He watched as she 
shuddered through one orgasm after another.  Her mouth 
pursed into a strained circle, soft, high-pitched "Oh"s of 
delighted surprise wavered into the air around them.  He 
couldn't help drinking in her wide, dilated eyes; her head, 
thrashing back and forth in sensual abandon; her fists, 
clenched around the seat cushion, nails digging into the foam 
cover.  This was what Scully looked like in the throes of 
passion.  This is what he would see if he were inside her, 
stroking them both to ecstatic heights of bliss.  He suddenly 
felt an overwhelming urge to kiss her, but that probably wasn't 
a good idea.  For one thing, it would make what he was doing so 
much more personal.  He needed to keep his perspective.  
Trying to make this about love would make things messy later 
on.  He was just there to help.  A special kind of service, as it 
were.  Besides, the Kindred might spread their poison as much 
through saliva as through touch.  He really had no way of 
knowing for sure, and if he caught this nookie disease, too, 
they'd be in seriously deep shit.  He was having enough trouble 
denying himself release without the help of hyper-charged 
hormones.

After fifteen minutes, he started to wonder how much longer 
she could stand the stimulation.  She definitely seemed to be 
getting some relief, but it didn't look like there was any 
diminishing of her need.  In fact, the increasing volume of her 
cries seemed to indicate that she was building toward some 
kind of major event.  

He seriously considered stopping what he was doing and 
hauling her off to the nearest hospital.  Before he could make 
up his mind, Scully's wildly darting eyes suddenly locked with 
his and Mulder knew a moment of panic.  He'd never seen her 
look at him that way before.  Feral.  Ravenous.  Like a starving 
person gazing at the only speck of food available.  

Before he could process what was happening, she'd unlatched 
her seatbelt and leaned sideways into his lap.  He looked down 
and realized that she'd capitalized on a major strategical error 
on his part.  He'd been so busy getting her into the car and 
deciding what to do next that he'd forgotten to zip up again.  
His belt was hanging open, the sides of his fly gaping in 
invitation.  

Dammit dammit, STUPID!

Scully didn't seem to be as worried as he'd been about taking 
advantage.  She was already dragging his steel-hard cock out 
of his pants while he was still trying to sort out the sequence 
of events.  He hissed as she gripped the base of his dick, leaned 
over and engulfed him with her hot, wet mouth.

"Nuh -- No, Scu -- No, no, stop -- Scul --"

Godgodgodgodgodgoodgoodsogoodsogood it felt so good so 
perfect so Scully please make it last make it last make it last 
not gonna last can't last no no nononononono....

He wasn't supposed to get pleasure from this he wasn't he 
shouldn't but he couldn't help it he just couldn't help it not 
with her hot mouth sliding and her strong tongue flicking and 
her lips stretched so wide over him and the noises she was making 
the humming and moaning and wet wet sounds of sex of sex of sex 
with Scully Scully Scully...

His hand was still inside her pants, trapped by her bent hips as 
she slurped up and down, up and down his painfully hard 
length.  He didn't want to come he didn't he didn't but he knew 
he couldn't hold on.  He tried but it was hopeless.  And Scully 
obviously hadn't had enough yet, needed more, so much more, 
from him.  All he could give her was his touch.  He wasn't 
allowed to give her anything else, not yet.  So he did what he 
could, grinding the heel of his hand against her pubic bone, 
hoping he could hit the right spot, jamming his fingers as far as 
he could reach between her legs, pressing the swollen flesh 
under her soggy panties.  He reached around with his other 
hand and palmed her breast, squeezing the firm mound, feeling 
the hard peak inside her bra as he pinched it between his 
thumb and forefinger.  

He hoped it would be enough.  It was all he had to give.

Her shriek of release was muffled by his cock, but she didn't let 
go of him.  Instead, she sucked harder as she cried out her 
pleasure, coming around him, under him, against his fingers, 
shaking and keening, her moans and screams vibrating against 
his engorged penis until he couldn't hold back any longer.  

He let go of her breast and tried to push her head away, but 
she wouldn't move.  He'd never yet forced a woman to swallow 
while giving head, but it looked like he wouldn't have any 
choice.  There was no way he could stop it.  He could feel 
every one of her teeth on his skin, her soft lips, the swirl of 
her tongue as it ran over the veins, her mouth pulling at the 
head of his prick, sucking and sucking and driving him mad.  His 
fingers and toes tingled.  Sweat rolled down the side of his face 
as he gasped each breath.  His gut clenched in readiness.  He 
closed his eyes, the better to experience every wonderfully 
painful second.  

She cupped his balls through his slacks and stars exploded 
behind his eyes.  It was like free falling.  Like sky diving.  
Like rocketing into the stratosphere without breath enough to 
shout.  It was the most fantastic feeling in the world.  

And it was over far too soon.  

When he could breathe again, Mulder opened his eyes and 
looked down.  Scully was lying quietly with her head in his lap, 
nuzzling his softening penis and apparently no longer under the 
Kindred's spell.  The close proximity of her face to his cock 
jolted him to his senses like a deluge of icy rain water down the 
back of his neck.  

He gently helped her back into her seat.  Straightening her 
body out relieved the stranglehold on his other hand, so he was 
able to remove it from her pants and shake the circulation back 
into it.  Then he pulled his slacks outward at the zipper until 
his flaccid penis slipped back inside the fly.  For some reason, 
being covered again made him feel more in control.  It probably 
involved some Freudian shit about sexual vulnerability, but he 
didn't care about that at the moment.  All he knew was that he 
needed to get out of the car -- right NOW.

Mulder opened the door, clambered awkwardly into the damp 
night on rubbery legs, then slammed it shut again.  He checked 
to make sure he was securely tucked out of the way before 
zipping shut.  The unbuckled belt clanked as he paced beside 
the car, three steps forward, three steps back along the side of 
the door.  He ran his fingers through his hair and looked down 
at his disheveled clothes.

What the hell had just happened here?

A bark of laughter burst from his mouth, cracking off the 
surrounding trees. 

He knew what had happened.  It hadn't been *that* long.  But 
what had just HAPPENED?  This wasn't supposed to be about 
his pleasures, his needs and desires.  He'd made a conscious 
decision to help out a friend in unusual circumstances.  Had 
Scully also made a conscious choice when she'd --

Nope.  Best not to go there, really.  But he couldn't stop 
thinking about it.  Not yet.  The sensations were too new, too 
raw, too wonderful to be put aside so easily.  He wanted the 
chance to savor every detail, lock it into his memory in a 
special place so he could take it out from time to time and revel 
in it again.  

But he didn't have that option right now.  He didn't even know 
what condition she was in -- whether his "help" had rid her 
system of the Kindred toxin or made matters worse.

He bent down and looked inside the car.  She seemed to be 
asleep, leaning against the passenger door.  For all he knew, 
she could be unconscious, but she looked okay.  Her breathing 
was even and deep, like she had just dozed off.  

This was good.  Right?  She was probably sleeping off the after 
effects of the... thing they just did.  He didn't want to name it 
for fear his body would spring into action again.  

Mulder stood and tucked his shirt back into his pants.  He 
buckled his belt, pleased to note that his legs felt solid again 
and his heart had stopped racing.  All systems seemed to be in 
stand-down mode.  It was probably safe for him to get back in 
the car and get them the hell out of Dodge.

At least he wouldn't be driving all the way back to town with his 
boner bumping against the steering wheel.

He scrubbed his hands over his face and froze.  

Jesus!  The smell of her was still on his fingers.  

An involuntary inhale was underway before he could stop it.  
He held his breath as soon as he realized what he was doing, 
but it was too late.  Scully's scent was now swirling through his 
nasal passages and into his lungs.  It prickled in his sinuses 
and exploded into his brain.  This was *Scully*!  He'd never be 
able to forget her fragrance no matter how hard he tried.  

So what was the point in trying?  

He took another healthy whiff, then yanked open the car door 
and climbed into the seat.  They really needed to get out of 
there.  He had to wash his hands before he sniffed all the skin 
off his fingers.  

If he was really lucky, he might get a chance to experience that 
scent again sometime, a little closer and in more detail.  Until 
then, memory would have to be enough.

Mulder started the car and looked over at his oblivious partner.  
She didn't move when he gently zipped up her slacks and 
belted her back in, but she didn't feel cold or clammy either.  
It looked like she was down for the count, sleeping off the 
endorphin rush.  He put the car in reverse and backed around 
until they were pointed toward town again.  

Scully slept beside him all the way back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Steveston Kafe
 

Mulder shook the water from his hands and stared at himself in 
the men's room mirror. 

She didn't remember.  She said she was fine, not sick or 
feeling ill at all, didn't want to go to the hospital, but she 
couldn't remember a thing.  

As they headed back into town, he'd decided that some coffee 
was in order if for no other reason than he needed a different 
aroma in his nose.  The one currently residing there was 
making him crazy.  When he'd pulled up at the Steveston Kafe 
("Koffee, Kakes and Pies to Go"), Scully jerked awake as the 
car came to a stop.

"Where are we?" she'd asked with a touch of panic in her voice.

"We're back in town," he'd answered, not willing to commit 
beyond the obvious yet.

"What are we doing?  How did we get here?  Where are the 
Kindred?"

So many questions.  He was completely thrown off by the 
implications and wasn't entirely sure how to answer any of 
them.  So he asked one of his own.

"What's the last thing you remember?"

Splitting up at the barn and Brother Andrew asking to speak to 
her -- that's as far back as her memories went.  She didn't 
remember going up to the man's room or being mauled by him.  
She didn't remember anything he might have told her about 
who the murderer was.  

He thought Scully would be embarrassed by her lack of self 
control, so he'd been ready with soothing reassurances and 
platitudes as needed.  He never expected her to be totally 
blank on the whole event.  She'd been pretty out of it ever 
since they left the farmhouse but he was sure she'd at least 
remember enough to know what her own partner had done to 
her.  For her.  

Now he wasn't sure if he wanted her to remember or not.

He'd enjoyed giving her pleasure in the car, watching her face, 
hearing her cries.  Really enjoyed it, even before she'd 
reciprocated and he'd nearly lost his mind.  Maybe he'd 
enjoyed it too much.  Being involved with Scully would not only 
complicate their partnership, it would take time away from other 
things.  Important things.  Like finding his sister and exposing 
the alien conspiracy.  He wanted to be closer to her.  He did.  
But now might not be the best time.  All things considered, it 
was just as well that she didn't remember.

Still, there was a part of him that wanted to throw itself on the 
floor and pitch a tantrum over what couldn't be.

Well, now was not the time for that either.  

Mulder dried his hands and straightened his tie.  He pulled his 
shoulders back, looked himself in the eye and nodded.  Much 
better.  Just get on with the investigation and put this incident 
out of mind -- at least until he was home alone.  No one could 
hold him accountable for the things that happened in his 
imagination as long as they didn't know about it.  And he'd 
make damned sure no one found out -- especially Scully.

He exited the restroom, brushing past the man waiting to enter 
with a murmured "Excuse me."  Glancing out the front window 
of the shop, he located the car parked at the curb.  Scully sat 
motionless in the passenger seat, staring at the people passing 
with blank eyes.  He watched her for a moment and then 
walked to the counter next to the cash register.

"Two coffees to go, please."

What happened out in the woods would be his secret for now.  
There was no other choice.  Maybe, someday, he'd be able to 
share it with Scully, sometime in the future when they could be 
together as more than partners.  But not now.  Not for a long 
time, perhaps.

"Here you go, sir."  The perky little blonde smiled as she 
handed over the Styrofoam cups and he smiled back 
automatically as he took them.  

Then he walked out the door and back to the car.  Back to his 
partner.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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