From: marcella schultz <girlie_girl74@yahoo.com>
Date: Fri, 4 Jul 2003 20:01:20 -0700 (PDT)
Subject: New Story: Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Source: direct

Title: Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Author: Girlie_girl7
Email: Girlie_girl74@yahoo.com
Category: MSR, Skinner, bit o'fluff
Date: 04-04-03
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Pusher
Archive: anywhere
Disclaimer: Fox owns 'em 
Summary: Skinner learns a thing or two from Pusher and
so does M&S




                Hair Today Gone Tomorrow


Walter Skinner is laying in bed tossing and turning. 
The day hasn't gone well and he's just beginning to
think things through.

"What a day," Skinner says as he flops onto his back
and pulls the blankets up to his bare chest.  He lets
out a large sigh and stares at the ceiling.  "I know I
should be feeling sorry for Mulder and I do, shit, he
almost killed his partner but my day hasn't been a
walk in the park either."

Skinner runs his hand down his face and drops it to
his side.  "I had to deal with Mulder off on a wild
tangent fired by some theory of his, then the perp has
the nerve to call me 'Mel Cooley'.  Where did he come
up with that!  I know I don't have a thick, full head
of hair like Mulder does but many woman find a. . .oh
what's the politically correct term, folliclly
challenged, yeah that's it; a folliclly challenged guy
desirable.  Although when was the last time someone
called Mulder a soft as sable, full head of hair,
nitwit?  You don't hear that very often.              
                     While I, on the other hand have
heard it all; chrome-dome, skinhead, baldie, even
one-half of Dolly Parton."  

Skinner turns on his side and yanks the blanket up to
his chin.  "Then to top it all off, I'm this
ex-marine, who is FBI trained, still in good shape,
physically fit, with some stature in the Bureau and
some woman kicks my ass. At least I do share that with
Mulder, Scully has done it to him enough times."

He sighs and runs his hand over his head then punches
his pillow.  "Oh how the mighty have fallen," a smile
crosses his lips, "but things are about to change."

--

9:15 Friday, the Hoover Building

Agent's Mulder and Scully approach Walter Skinner's
office.  "Good morning Kim, is he ready for us?"
Mulder asks.

Kim Cook looks up from her filing, "I'm sorry Agents
but AD Skinner has cancelled all his appointments for
the day."

Mulder looks at his partner thinking that this was so
unlike their boss.  "Okay, well will you tell him we
were here."

"Will do." Kim says pushing the hair out of her eyes
and returns to her filing.

The two agents leave the office. "Hum, that was weird.
 You think he's sick?" Scully asks.

"I don't know but while the cats away the mice will
play," Mulder replies. "You want to cut out early for
lunch Scully?"

"Mulder, we still have other paper work that's due by
the end of the week.  For once lets try to get it in
on time."

Mulder sighs, "Kill joy."  Just then his cell phone
rings. "Mulder."

"Oh sir, we were just in your . . .Yes, but can't you
tell . . . okay, we'll be right there."  Mulder closes
his cell phone.  "Looks like we're going to be taking
that early lunch after all."

--

Mulder and Scully make their way across town to a
neighborhood bar called the High and Dry.  Scully
steps from the Taurus, squinting in the sun, "Mulder
are you sure Skinner said to meet him here?" 

"That's what he said," Mulder says as he pockets the
keys.  He holds the door open for Scully; they walk
into the musty smelling, little dive and pause
allowing their eyes to adjust to the darkness as they
look around.  The place only has about twenty
customers in it and none of them look like Skinner.

Scully scans the crowd. "Maybe we're early."

"Maybe."

They walk through the crowd of small tables making
their way to the bar. Mulder stops the bartender,
"Excuse me but we're looking for our friend."  He
feels Scully tugging at his coat sleeve. 

"Mulder."

"What?"

Scully points to the end of the bar to the last stool
that is currently occupied by a man who looks exactly
like Skinner but 
with a full head of hair.  Both agents stare at the
man.

"Agent Scully," the man bids.

The sound of the man calling her name breaks Scully
out of her reverie.  She looks questioningly at him,
"Sir?"

Mulder breaks into a huge grin as Scully instinctively
jabs him in the ribs with a bony elbow.  "Ooof," is
all Mulder can moan as the smile leaves his face. 

Scully approaches her boss.  "Sir, I don't . . .sir,"
is all she gets out.

"You like it?" Skinner asks either seeking or needing
her approval.

"Yes, I ah, do," Scully nervously says.

"We hardly recognized you," Mulder says then adds,
"you look so different."

"You really think I do?" Skinner beams.

"Absolutely." Mulder nods. "You look years younger and
virile . . ."

Scully jumps in before Mulder can dig himself in
deeper.

"Sir, may I ask what brought about this sudden
change?" she motions to Skinner's head and takes the
seat next to him as Mulder sits down next to her.

Skinner fingers the bar straw that sits in his drink
and looks down at the counter.  "I realized my hair
was getting a bit thin and I wanted to do something
about it."

Scully looks over at her boss.  "Well you certainly
have done that."

"So what do you really think?" Skinner asks with a
pensive look on his face.

Scully elbows Mulder again.  "I like it sir but I
don't think you need it.  You have charm and
sophistication with an air of authority with which you
carry yourself.  Do you really think this, this. . ."
Scully motions to the hairpiece, "adds to your
persona?"

"Agent Scully would you have given Agent Mulder a
second glance if he were folliclly challenged?"
Skinner pointedly asks her.

Scully is taken back by this line of thought while
Mulder moves just a little closer to her.  "I beg your
pardon sir, I don't understand?"

"Would you find Mulder as attractive as you do if he
didn't have that thick head of hair?  And there is no
use in denying you two aren't drawn to one another."

"Are you in the pool too?" Mulder quips.

Scully's jaw drops.

Mulder looks past his stunned little partner. 
"Personally sir, I would find it a little off-putting
if Agent Scully were bald or folliclly challenged as
you put it."

Scully's blue eyes snap at her partner giving him a
testicular shriveling stare, she then looks at
Skinner, "All I am saying 
sir is that you are an attractive man with or without.
. .follicles.

Just then a tall brunette, all eyes and boobs walks up
to Skinner.   "Is this seat taken?"  She asks pointing
to the stool Scully is currently occupying.

"Actually it is," Skinner replies while Scully does a
slow burn.

"Well then," the brunette purrs, "I see your lap is
available."

Skinner's face brightens up.

The brunette thrusts out her carefully manicured hand.
 "Hi, my name is Kelly with one 'l'.

Scully turns toward Mulder "Wouldn't that be Kee-ly
then?"

"Shh." Mulder frowns.

"Hello, I'm Walter," Skinner says, adding, "and these
two are just leaving."

"Oh right," Mulder jumps in, "busy day at the office,
got to get back."  He takes Scully by the elbow and
ushers her off the stool.

The two agents make their way to the front door and
pause long enough to see their boss ordering Kely a
drink. 

As they step out into the bright sunlight, Mulder
pulls out his sunglasses and puts them on.  He looks
down at Scully with a laugh and says, "A bit thin!"

"Mulder," Scully warns.
 
"Scully what has Skinner been thinking all these
years; that his part is just getting 'a bit' wider?"

Scully grins then turns serious.  "Stop it Mulder,
this is obviously bothering Skinner."

"Aww Scully, this will pass."

Scully looks up at her partner. "How do you know?"

"Because all men go through this stage in life."

Scully looks suspiciously at him, "Oh so you've been
there too?"  She turns and steps on her tiptoes to
ruffle his hair.

Mulder blushes, "No, not in regards to my hair."

"In regards to what then?"  Scully isn't going to let
this rest.

Mulder chews on his bottom lip then runs his tongue
over his teeth.

"Mulder?" Scully ducks her head and looks up into his
sunglasses.

Mulder opens his jacket and puts his hands on his
hips, looking over Scully's head he says, "My nose."

"Your . . . nose?" Scully softly questions.

Mulder takes Scully by the elbow and leads her to the
car.  Once inside she turns toward him, "Your nose? 
What about it?"

Mulder turns on the car but doesn't engage the gears. 
"It's rather large, don't you think?"

Scully studies his face and smiles, "No not at all, it
fits your face."

Mulder stares at her, "Great! Now you're saying my
entire face is too big?"

Scully can't help but laugh, "Mulder you have a
perfect face, nose and all.  Besides some people think
a large nose is an indication of other . . .large . .
. things."  Now Scully is blushing.

"Well then," Mulder says as he puts the car into gear,
"it's a wonder I can zip my pants."

Scully goes from a slight blush to beet red in a
matter of seconds.

--

Saturday morning finds Dana Scully up to her elbows in
last weeks and this weeks laundry; remembering she
hates back-to-back road trips.  Just as she closes the
washer lid for the third time today she hears her
doorbell ring.  She walks to the front door just in
time to hear that all too familiar voice yelling,
"Scully, it's me."

She pulls open the door to see two large laundry
baskets plus a duffel bag piled on top being carried
by her partner.  "Mulder, what do you think you're
doing?"  She says a bit peeved but moving aside to let
him in.

Mulder looks around the huge pile he is carrying, "The
laundry room is out of commission in my building so I
thought I'd slip over here and use yours."

Scully stands with her hands on her hips and frowns,
"Haven't you ever heard of a Laundromat?"

"Yes but I don't have any quarters."

She pushes the door shut and leans against it. "They
have change machines you know."

Mulder carries his baskets into her kitchen and plops
them onto her table.  "Don't you want me here?"  He
asks in a hurt tone.

"Yes of course I do," Scully says feeling a bit guilty
but knowing full well Mulder is taking advantage of
the hold that he has on her emotions and certain
someday that she will probably kill him over that
hold.  She rolls her eyes and grabs another bottle of
detergent from under the counter.  "Come on," she
smiles at him.

Once Scully has shown Mulder how to sort clothes and
select the proper machine settings and how not to over
load the washer they sit down to lunch.

Mulder takes a large bite of his sandwich and
swallows, "I wonder how Walter did last night.  You
think he got lucky?"

 Scully eyes Mulder over her own sandwich.  "I don't
know."

"Scully would you have taken a second look at me if I
had been bald?"

"Who says I've taken a second look at you Mulder,"
Scully teases.

"I've caught you checking out my ass," he teases back.

"Mulder! I have not," Scully protests, adding, "well
maybe just a little."

Mulder has this large testosterone induced grin across
his face.

"Mulder once I got to know the real you I'm sure it
wouldn't have made any difference."

"But what if we weren't partnered, what if we had just
passed in the hall or we were both just agents working
in the bull pen would it have made a difference?"

"That's hard to say. I think woman look at men
differently then men look at women."

"How so?"

"Women will accept men with what society deems as
flaws easier than men will accept women."

"So you think men are looking for a trophy wife and
woman are looking for good breeding stock?"

"That's putting it rather bluntly but yes I do."

"I think you're being unfair Scully."

"Face it Mulder if we had just met you would
immediately think I'm too short."

"No I wouldn't and I didn't."  

Scully is aware she's about to tread on dangerous
territory, "So what did you think of me?"

Mulder takes a bite out of his sandwich.  "I'm not
sure you want to know what I thought."

Scully shifts in her chair, "That bad?"

"No not at all; of course being the good investigator
I am I checked you out before we met."

Scully suddenly finds her sandwich very interesting. 
Mulder grabs her hand and pulls the sandwich down from
her face.  "Scully, you blew me away.  You had this
chip on your shoulder, a sharp mind and a
self-confident attitude that I found exciting and
challenging."

Scully glances up at Mulder and softly says, "What
about my appearance?"

Mulder mulls over the question making Scully extremely
nervous.  "You could be my trophy wife, a little
trophy but a trophy non the  less."

This brings a smile to Scullys face.  "Thank you
Mulder," she softly says.

"And that shapely little ass of yours."

"Mulder."

"And those huge . . ."

"Mulder!"

"Blue eyes."  He grins at her.

"Okay, that's enough," Scully snickers.  "Let's get
back to the laundry."

Mulder dumps his glass into the sink then grabs Scully
around the waist pulling her close enough so that he
can rest his chin on her head.   Scully laughs but
doesn't pull away.  "Besides Scully, you are the exact
height for a chin rest."

Scully turns around in his arms and pats his biceps,
"I'm glad I'm good for something."

Mulder releases her and trails along to the laundry
room. "Scully have I ever told you what a superb
laundress you are?"

"Save it Mulder, you are doing your own shorts."

--

Mulder finishes his laundry but doesn't go home.  He
works on Scully's computer while she runs some
errands.  He glances over to see his favorite pair of
jeans on top of the pile of clean clothes.  Figuring
it wouldn't hurt he grabs the jeans and heads for the
bathroom intent on taking a shower.

Scully comes home to find her PC running, laundry
baskets sitting on her coffee table and a trail of
Mulder's clothing leading to her bathroom.  She knocks
on the bathroom door, "Mulder, I'm home."

"Okay Scully, be out soon." She picks up Mulder's
castoffs and heads toward the kitchen.  

The doorbell rings and she answers it to find Skinner
standing before her while she stands before him
holding Mulder's shoes, shirt, shorts and jeans. 
"Sir," she nervously says, "how nice to see you."  She
immediately notices he is back to being folliclly
challenged.

Suddenly the bathroom door is flung open. Mulder is
standing there covered only by a small towel.  "Hey
Scully can you toss me a pair of shorts?"

Scully looks from Mulder to Skinner and back to
Mulder.  She practically leaps across the room to
gather up a pair of under shorts before tossing them
to Mulder who is dripping on her living room carpet. 
He raises his right hand to catch the shorts while
Scaly is silently praying that his left hand has a
firm grip on the towel.

Mulder spots Skinner.  "Sir! I didn't know you where
here."  Scully gives him a little shove; muttering,
"Put some clothes on," as she pulls the bathroom door
shut.

She straightens her shirt and pushes back her hair
then squares her shoulders and marches back to face
Skinner.  Wringing her hands she begins, "I'm sorry
sir, you see Mulder's laundry room was out of order
and he just . . ."

Skinner breezes past her tossing one hand into the
air, "Save it Agent Scully, what you and Agent Mulder
do in your free time is none of my business so if you
two want to do each others unmentionables please don't
mention it." 

Scully is totally confused now, "So why are you here?"

Skinner smiles down at his Agent. "I've met a woman."

"Not Kelly with one 'l'," Scully winces.

"No," Skinner says taking a seat on her couch, "I knew
right away she was a flake.  I was finally able to
brush her off so I went back to the office and Kim
Cook; my assistant was still there.  It was after 6pm
and there she was toiling away.  I know she could have
cut out for the day but she was there, doing work,
making things easier for me."

Scully nods her head, she can relate to that.

"Anyway, she took in my new look and laughed out
loud."  Skinner grins, somewhat embarrassed. "One
thing lead to another and soon we were both laughing."

Scully silently takes in what Skinner is saying as
Mulder pads out of the bathroom with a wet head and
bare feet.  He sits down in an armchair across from
Skinner and Scully.

"Agent Scully, Miss Cook. . . Kim said the same things
that you said to me, then we went out to dinner and
had a nice time."  Skinner pauses and studies Scully. 
"Kim reminds me a lot of you."

Scully looks over at Mulder unsure of what to say.

"She's fiercely loyal and protective, she covers my
ass when I get it too close to the grinder," Skinner
says then raising his voice adding, "I hope you're
listening to this Agent Mulder." 

Mulder smiles a lop-sided grin and nods his head in
the affirmative.

"I was so used to her just being there that I never
really took the time to look at her."  Skinner sighs
and softly says, "She's quite pretty."

Mulder finally speaks up, "So being folliclly
challenged doesn't bother you anymore?"

Skinner adjusts his glasses. "If it doesn't bother
woman like Agent Scully or Miss Cook then why should
it bother me?"

He rises from the sofa and walks toward the door. "Kim
and I have a date this Friday night."

Scully follows behind Skinner. "That's great sir, I'm
very happy for the two of you."

Mulder hangs back while Scully opens the door to let
Skinner out. He looks back at Scully and softly says,
"Agent, he's hard-headed," Skinner nods toward Mulder,
"but he's worth it."

Scully smiles, "I know."

Skinner pulls the door shut leaving Scully staring at
it while Mulder looks down at the floor and clears his
throat.

"So," Mulder finally says.

"So," Scully repeats but doesn't turn around.

Mulder finally makes the first move and walks over to
stand behind Scully while she fiddles with a loose
chip of paint on her door.  Once again Mulder uses
Scully's head as a chin rest and wraps his arms around
her.  She smiles and leans back into his embrace. 
"Scully, I think it's about time we stop using the
bureau as an excuse."

Scully continues to worry the paint chipping off her
door.  "Mulder, I don't know what you mean?"

Mulder spins her around.  "Sure you do." He grins down
at her as he lifts her chin with his finger and softly
says, "Look Scully if Skinner and Kim can breech
protocol. . ." He doesn't need to finish. Scully is
looking up at him with large, wet, blue eyes.  He
lowers his lips to hers as she runs her fingers
through his hair.  The kiss is long and lingering.  As
they part Scully breathlessly says, "Your head is
wet."

Mulder lets a smirk cross his face.  Scully realizes
the innuendo behind the smile and grabs Mulder by the
belt loops drawing him closer to her.  He locks his
arms around her back but just a bit lower than his
usual spot.  Both Agents let shy smiles cross their
faces.

Scully steps up on tiptoes to brush her nose against
his.  "So Mulder what do you say we go see if what
they say about a man with a large nose is true."

Mulder chuckles and kisses her nose. "Agent Scully I
thought you would never ask."



                            ~ The End ~