From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org
Date: 13 Jun 2001 23:31:19 -0000
Subject: Heart Turned Inwards 4 : The Lonely Gunman (1/1) by Shoshana
Source: direct

Reply To: shoshana1013@excite.com


Heart Turned Inwards: The Lonely Gunman
(1/1)
By Keleka & Shoshana
Email: keleka@keleka.net & shoshana1013@excite.com
Distribution: Gossamer okay.  Anywhere else, please ask.
Rating: PG 
Spoiler Warning: Requiem
Content Statement: MSR
Classification: VR
Keywords:  MSR

Summary: The Lone Gunman comes to dinner.

Fourth in the 'Heart Turned Inwards' series.  This
one really won't make any sense if you haven't
read the first three.  They're all available on
Ephemeral/Gossamer and at http://www.keleka.net/keleka/

Disclaimer: Get real!  If we owned this cash cow,
do you really think we'd be writing fanfic?  
Feedback: Always welcome in our houses!
Author's Note: Huge steaming piles of
thanks to our beta, Fabulous Monster, and the
gang at the I Want to Believe mailing list
for their group beta and advice. 
All our fanfic can be found at our websites:
http://www.keleka.net/keleka/
and
http://members.tripod.com/shoshana1013/



Heart Turned Inwards 4: The Lonely Gunman
by Keleka & Shoshana


As he pulled his vehicle up to the curb in front of Dana
Scully's house, John Byers wondered how often it had been
said that 'one is the loneliest number'?  More times than
he cared to count, that's for sure.   For over a decade, he
had perceived himself as one of three.  'The Lone Gunmen.' 
Or, 'The Three Stooges,' as Dana Scully had always been
fond of calling him, Frohike, and Langly.   Raised to be a
corporate man, he had never chafed at losing his
individuality to the group.  It had given him comfort to
know that he belonged to a larger whole.  He hadn't known
that comfort for a long time.

This morning, when Byers's phone had rung for the first
time in days, he felt, finally, that the 'oneness' of his
life might finally be over.  Mulder was back.  Mulder and
Scully were together again.  Mulder and Scully and Andrew
made three.  Byers liked things that came in threes.  The
thought made him smile as he stepped out of his car and
looked up at Dana Scully's townhouse.   He opened the trunk
and then flipped a switch on a small remote control he
carried in his pocket.  A steamer trunk levitated smoothly
out of the trunk and moved to the sidewalk where it hovered
patiently, waiting for him to tell it where to go next.  Of
all the technological advances he'd witnessed in the last
thirty years, the 'Anti-Grav Porter' was far and away his
favorite. 

The steamer trunk floated calmly behind him as he slowly
climbed the steps to Scully's front door.  He was spry for
his age, but his eyesight left something to be desired, and
he was extra cautious on steps.  It had been months since
he had visited Scully's home and weeks since he had heard
from her.  Andrew called once a week like clockwork though,
and occasionally he dropped by to visit.  Other than Scully
and Andrew, Byers really had no friends.  He was truly the
'Lone Gunman' now.  It made his heart sing to know that his
old friend Mulder was back.

When the door opened, Scully greeted him with a smile and
a hug.  She was dressed attractively in an amethyst dress
which cascaded around her ankles.  Her trim figure still
looked marvelous for her sixty-six years of age.  Thrice
weekly trips to the gym guaranteed she looked lovely still.
She'd even had to refuse a few propositions from younger
men at the health club. It seemed to Byers that he'd known
Scully forever, but it wasn't until after Mulder
disappeared that he had really gotten to know Dana Scully. 
He had quickly grown to understand how Mulder had fallen so
head-over-heels in love with her, and why he had taken so
long to tell her.  She was one formidable woman.

"Where's the guest of honor?" Byers asked as he steered
his levitating package into the house and into a corner of
the living room.

"He went for a run.  He'll be back shortly."  Scully
motioned him to join her into the kitchen while she
finished preparing dinner.

"A run?  Alone?"  Byers was surprised.  "Is that wise, at
his age?"

Scully came to a quick stop and turned around.  "I forgot
to tell you, John.  Remember what I told you once about
Einstein's theory?"  Byers nodded.  "I was right."

Byers felt as though the wind had been knocked out of him.
"Oh my God," he said.  "Then...."

"He thinks he was gone only two days."

"Then he's...."

"Not much older than Andrew," Scully said, finishing his
sentence and moving to the counter where she resumed making
three salads.  She hoped her own ambivalence toward the
situation wasn't apparent.

"Jesus, Dana.  Have they met yet?"

Scully laughed and threw a glance at Byers.  "Andrew met
him first.  He was returned to the emergency room at
Andrew's hospital.  My theory is that they returned him
there on purpose...because of Andrew.  Very considerate of
them, don't you think?"

Byers moved to the counter and stood beside Scully.  He
swiped a carrot stick from the pile she had cut and turned,
leaning against the counter.  He munched on the carrot
stick absentmindedly.

"Does he remember anything?" he asked after a moment.

Scully put down her knife and wiped her hands.  She look
at Byers thoughtfully for a moment.  "You know, I really
don't know.  I didn't want to press him.  I didn't know
what they'd done to him or whether he'd want to talk about
it.  So far...so far he hasn't said anything.  He's been
more concerned with learning what he's missed here on
Earth."

"How's he taking it?"

Scully smiled and carried the three salads to the
refrigerator.  She stopped at the oven for a moment to
check on the beef pot pie she was baking.  When she opened
the door, the escaping aroma made Byers's mouth water.  He
always was a sucker for Skinner's beef pot pie, and he knew
Scully always used Skinner's recipe.

"So far...with a sense of humor," she said after she was
satisfied with the pie's progress.  "I think he has his
moments of melancholy, but he's holding up well.  He's
actually quite psyched about meeting his grandchildren
tomorrow."

Byers couldn't suppress a laugh.  "Mulder a grandfather. 
That had to be a shock for him."

"I think he was more shocked by the names Andrew and Becky
gave his grandsons."

Byers smiled, but then his eyes turned serious.  "Does he
know about...you and Walter?"

Scully looked away for a moment.  "Yes.  He knows."

"And?"

"He knows what?" came Mulder's voice from the door.  Sweat
trickled down his broad chest, weaving through his sparse,
mahogany-colored hair, as he wiped himself down with a
towel.  He still had the same healthy color he'd had the
day he disappeared, and the sight of him perspiring and
breathing heavily from his run was enough to bring a blush
to Scully's cheeks.  Seeing him like this brought to the
surface some long-buried memories and desires.

"Mulder...."  Before Byers could continue, he felt the
long nurtured sadness bubble up inside him.  He felt his
throat clench and the tears begin as he was helpless to
stop them.  Scully tenderly patted him on the back and made
soothing noises.  Mulder hesitated for a moment, briefly
overwhelmed by his friend's outpouring of emotion.

Mulder took tentative steps toward Byers.  He looked just
as Mulder imagined he would look.  The same, just older. 
Frailer, perhaps, but with the same perfect posture; his
hair and beard now turned a distinguished gray.  Scully
smiled at Mulder and stepped away.  Mulder slipped his arms
around Byers and pulled him close.

"It's okay, John.  I'm back now."

Byers struggled for a moment to control himself.  "It's
been so long, Mulder," he blurted out.  "So much has
happened."

"I know, John.  It's okay."  Mulder glanced at Scully who
looked like she was about to cry herself.  He was just
beginning to realize how much the last thirty years had
affected the people who were closest to him.  Byers was one
of the strongest, most determined people Mulder'd ever
known, and yet somehow he seemed so much more vulnerable
now, just as Scully had earlier.

After a few moments, Mulder could feel Byers calming.  He
pulled back and smiled.  "Better now?" he asked.

Byers nodded.  "I'm sorry.  I'm just so glad to see you,
Mulder."

"Let me go catch a shower and I'll be right back," Mulder
said.  He gave Scully a quick kiss on the cheek and left to
go upstairs.

"Andrew's the spitting image of him," Byers said after a
moment.

"I know.  They look like they could be brothers.  Doesn't
say much for Scully genes, does it?  The only thing Andrew
got from me was blue eyes."

Byers put his arms around Scully and hugged her tightly. 
"Don't underestimate your contribution, Dana," he said
softly.  "Andrew may look like Mulder, but he's got your
personality and temperament."

Scully pulled away, laughing.  "My temperament?  Is that
your way of saying he's a hot-headed Irishman?"

Byers chuckled softly.  He pulled back, looking at her
intently.  "Are you....is he...going to live here with
you?"  

Scully averted her eyes and turned back to the counter. 
She smiled at Byers's tactful question as cleaned up the
discarded carrot skins on the counter.  After a moment she
nodded.  "He says he is," she said softly.

Byers studied her for a moment.  "Do you want him to?"
Byers prodded gently.

Scully carefully wiped her hands dry on her apron before
removing it.  She looked at Byers briefly, her expression
blank, her eyes betraying nothing.  She lifted a pile of
dinner plates and silverware and turned to carry them to
the dining room.  Gently, Byers placed his hand on her arm,
stopping her.

"He's been gone a long time, Dana," he said, barely above
a whisper.  "It's understandable to be confused."  She
smiled and nodded her head toward some glasses and coffee
cups.

"Help me set the table, John."

                                                *


"Damn, Scully.  When did you learn to cook like this?" 
Mulder wiped his mouth with his napkin before helping
himself to a second serving of pot pie.

Scully glanced briefly at Byers with a wry smile.  "Walter
taught me," she said softly.  "He was an excellent cook. 
This was his recipe."

Mulder snorted.  "The Big Guy could cook?  You've got to
be kidding."

"There were a lot of things we didn't know about him," she
said.  "He was full of surprises."

Mulder looked thoughtfully at Scully for a moment, sensing
that she'd like to tell him more about the man who helped
her raise his son.  He glanced quickly at Byers.  "Surprise
me," he said after a moment.  

Mulder listened quietly as Scully told him some of the 
things Skinner had done for her and Andrew over the years.  
He lowered his eyes and felt his throat constrict.  He was 
quiet a moment, then cleared his throat before looking up.  
"He took good care of my family for me," he said softly.

Scully reached for Mulder's hand and squeezed it gently. 
"He loved us, Mulder.  You, me, and Andrew.  We were his
family too."

When they finished eating, Scully scooted the two men into
the living room while she cleared the dishes.  Byers
laughed at Mulder's expression when he saw the box Byers
had brought with him rise from the floor, float gently over
to the sofa, and set itself down quietly at their feet. 
For several minutes Mulder amused himself by using the
remote control to levitate the box around the living room. 
Scully came in carrying a tray with three mugs of hot
coffee.

"You knock anything over with that, Mulder, and you're in
big trouble," she said when she saw the box floating
perilously close to an antique lamp.  She set the tray on
the coffee table and took a seat on Byers's other side.

"You never let me have any fun, Scully" he whined,
sticking out his lower lip in an exaggerated pout.  He
handed the remote control back to Byers who returned the
box to the floor at his feet.  "So what'd you bring, John?"
Mulder asked, taking a mug from the tray and sitting back
on the sofa.

Slowly Byers pulled open the box, pulling things out and
stacking them on the coffee table.  There were several
thick albums, and a smaller box containing several dozen
computer disks.

"Frohike left this box for you, Mulder," Byers said when
he was finished, his voice breaking slightly when he spoke.
"He wanted me to give these to you if you ever came back."

Mulder looked thoughtfully at the books and disks but
didn't reach for them.  "Tell me what happened to Frohike,
John."

Byers leaned back in the sofa, his hands clasped tightly
in his lap.  He lifted his eyes to look at Scully.  She
smiled encouragingly.

"He took his own life three years ago, Mulder," Byers said
in a low, composed voice.  "He was dying from heart
disease.  He couldn't stand it anymore...the pain, the
helplessness.  I came home one night and found him.  He 
had shot--"  he stopped, unable to say the words outloud.  
He shook his head regretfully.  Scully reached for Byers's 
hand and squeezed it gently.

"I'm so sorry, John," Mulder said, his voice a velvety
mumble, his eyes darkening with pain.  He imagined how
horrible it must have been like for Byers to come home and
find Frohike like that.  He knew it would have shaken him,
and he was far more inured to violent death.  "What about
Langly?" he asked after a moment.

"Oh, God, Mulder...." Byers blurted, his voice aching with
grief. Byers didn't continue and Mulder looked to Scully.

She took a deep breath and looked to Byers before she
began.  He nodded slightly, letting her know she could go
on.  "About ten years ago Langly was diagnosed as
schizophrenic.  The decline was so gradual...I should have
realized sooner...maybe we could have helped him if I had."
She blinked back tears, remembering how clear Langly's
symptoms had seemed in retrospect, yet how blind she had
been to them until it was too late.  "His paranoia grew so
strong that eventually he didn't even trust us.  One day he
disappeared and we've never been able to find him.  It's
been nearly six years."

The silence weighed heavily on Mulder.  The years had
taken their toll on his friends, and he regretted not being
there for them.  He once believed the world would be a
better place without him; that his friends wouldn't have
suffered the indignities they had if not for him and his
quest.  Now, though, after seeing what had happened to so
many of his friends, he couldn't help but think he might
have helped make their lives better had he been here.  
He reached for one of the albums Byers had removed from 
the box.

"What are these, John?" he asked.

The change of subject helped Byers regain control of his
emotions.  "Photo albums," he said after a moment. 
"Frohike made it his mission to document Andrew's life in 
case you ever returned."

Mulder opened one of the albums and began to flip through
it.  There were several hundred pictures in each album,
pictures of Andrew as an infant, toddler, and young boy. 
There were pictures of Andrew in a Boy Scout uniform,
playing baseball, at high school graduation.  Frohike had
truly documented the young man's life in glorious detail. 
As he paged through the albums, he occasionally asked
questions and enjoyed listening to Scully and Byers tell
him about Andrew's exploits.  Mulder felt himself rise and
fall on waves of emotions as Scully and Byers told him
about events in Andrew's life.  His son's life.  At times
it seemed surreal and he had to remind himself that he had
missed out on thirty years of life with Scully and Andrew. 
Scully seemed atuned to his emotional rollercoaster and
knew just when to squeeze his hand supportively.

Finally, he spotted a group picture of Andrew, Scully,
Skinner, the Gunmen, and a woman he didn't recognize. 
"What's this?" he asked, carefully removing the picture
from the album and handing it to Scully.

Scully smiled gently.  "That was at Andrew and Becky's
wedding.  It was just two years before Walter died.  It's
probably the only picture we have of the entire 'family.'" 
She handed the picture back to Mulder who studied it for
several moments.  For just an instant, he felt his
emotions overwhelming him.  Scully had used the word
'family,' and that felt so right.  The only person missing
was him.  He set the picture aside.  He would have it
enlarged and framed.

"What about these?" he asked, pointing to the video disks
Byers held.

"Video disks," Byers said.  "Frohike video-taped several
events and converted them to disks."  He handed the small
box to Mulder.

"Events?"  Mulder asked.  He pulled out the first disk and
looked at the label.  "'Andrew's birth,'" he read.  It
took a moment for it to sink in.  He looked at Scully, his
eyes wide.  "You let Frohike videotape you giving birth?!"

Scully blushed and ducked her head.  "Walter talked me
into it," she said.  "They both knew you'd want to see the
big event if you ever came back."

"Let's watch it!" Mulder said enthusiastically.  Now it
was John Byers's turn to blush.

Scully snatched the disk out of Mulder's hands.  "No way,"
she said, emphatically.  "I've watched it with Walter, but
no way is John seeing it."

Mulder laughed.  "Okay, we'll save it for later."  He
handed the disk to Scully who set it aside for safe
keeping.  "What else you got?"

"How about little league games and Boy Scout events?" Byers 
asked, holding up a disk.

"That'll do," said Mulder.

Byers crossed to a panel in the wall and slid the disk
into an open slot.  Mulder marveled as a three dimensional
picture appeared on the wall.  

An hour later, Mulder nudged Scully and pointed to Byers
who had fallen asleep.

"I think it's time for the old folk to turn in, Mulder,"
Scully said softly, standing and stretching.  "Why don't
you help John get to the guest room?  You can stay up if you
want, but I'm ready to turn in."

Mulder grinned.  "I'll be right up."

                                        *


Mulder washed his face, brushed his teeth and changed into
the pajama bottoms Scully had left out for him.  He turned
off the bathroom light before leaving the room, stepping
gingerly across Scully's bedroom to the edge of her bed. 
The only source of light now was the full moon outside the
window, broken into one-inch slats by the venetian blinds.

Scully wasn't asleep yet--he could tell by the soft
susurrous breaths she took as he climbed into bed beside
her.  Her heart rate seemed to increase in little
increments the closer he got to her, the more thoroughly he
wrapped his legs and arms around her.  She didn't pull
away, nor did she completely relax into his embrace.

Mulder gently pushed the collar of her silk pajamas aside
with his lips, then paved a trail of sweet caresses from
the nape of her neck to the tender spot just below her
delicate ear.  Her body tensed against his briefly, then
relaxed with a soft satisfied sigh.  She moved her neck a
fraction of inch, allowing him better access to that spot
he remembered so well.

"It's been so long, Mulder," she murmured.

"No more waiting, Scully.  Well, at least to have you in
my arms again, that is."

She pressed back against his strong, hard torso, telling
him he could go further if he liked.  Mulder tightened his
grip around her, smoothing his hands over the curve of her
hips, the softness of her belly.  He pressed his nose into
her silky hair, breathing deeply of her distinct, familiar
perfume.

Mulder wedged his chin against her shoulder, leaning
toward her ear so she could hear every word distinctly, "I
want to make love to you, Scully.  But not tonight. 
Tonight I just want us to enjoy the anticipation, to feel
our bodies respond anew.  I want to be unsated for just
one more night, knowing what's in store for me tomorrow
night."

"Are you sure?" Scully purred softly, arching her back
against his chest.

She could feel him smile against her shoulder when he
replied, "Very sure.  Besides, when I make love to you I
want us completely alone. I don't to share you with anyone
else.  I want to hear those noises you used to make--"

"Mulder!" she said, in mock disapproval.

"Byers is here tonight, Scully.  But tomorrow night
belongs to us--I'm going to make you come all night--"

She couldn't suppress schoolgirlish giggling as he
continued with his lustful promises, "I'm going to pay
heed to every square inch of your beautiful body, Scully. 
You deserve to be loved and loved well."

Mulder grabbed her shoulder and turned her around so he
could see her ageless face in the moonlight.  His tone was
dead serious now as he told her what he'd been thinking
all day, "I don't ever want you to suffer again, Scully.  I
won't let you be lonely again."

Tears slipped down her cheeks as she brought her hands to
his beloved face.  She hadn't gone a day for over thirty
years without his face before her.  She hadn't fallen
asleep for one night since he disappeared without wondering
where he was or what had been his ultimate fate.

"I'm so glad you're here.  I'm so glad you weren't the one
left behind, Mulder--because I don't know if you would have
taken it well."  She sniffled, wiping the moisture from
under her eyes.  "If it had been you--in my place--"

Mulder swooped in to kiss her soundly, then pulled back to
meet her liquid eyes.  "I would have waited for you.  I
wouldn't have given up hope."

"Yet I did," she answered shamefacedly, her voice cracked
and worn.

Mulder shook his head emphatically, denying her these words.

"No, no.  You didn't give up.  You did the best you could.
You waited so long, Scully.  I love you so much for that. 
I'm so sorry you had to raise Andrew without me.  I'm so
sorry I wasn't around for your pregnancy, for all those
moments when our boy was growing up."

Scully caressed his cheek tenderly, then wove her hand
through his thick, dark hair.  "I had help.  I had Walter.
I had our wonderful friends, all of them."

"And you still have Byers, Scully.  I'm so happy he's
still alive for me.  I'm so happy you had a family,
friends, to keep you from leading a lonely, isolated life.
And now, now I can get to know my son, get to play with my
grandchildren.  I'm so excited about that--I don't know
how I'll be able to sleep tonight.  I always wanted
children, you know that. But only if they were your
children, Scully.  Only you."

Mulder gathered her close to him again before she could
say another word.  He laid flat on his back, then pulled
her light weight over him like a warm blanket of
Scullyflesh.  She nuzzled her face down into his Ivory
scented skin.

She hummed a tuneless song against him, exhausted beyond
words by the events of the last few days, the passion of
the last few moments.  He stroked her satiny hair,
muttering soft words of comfort and love until he knew she
was truly at rest.

Mulder smiled in the darkness, listening to her even
respirations against his chest.  Tomorrow there was
something important he needed to do.  And, he would 
meet his grandchildren.  He couldn't wait.



*end*
*to be continued in Heart Turned Inwards 5*