From: Ten Date: Sat, 08 Apr 2000 21:42:22 +1000 Subject: "Hestia's Awakening" (1/1) by Ten Source: xff I'd better post this now, just in case GA's ep contradicts! TITLE: "Hestia's Awakening" (1/1) BY: Ten E-MAIL ADDRESS: kristena@ocean.com.au CATEGORY: V; MSR; Fluff RATING: R for adult situations and talk (I think this deserves an R rating, but FYI the scenes do 'fade to black' - do I hear the click of heaps of delete keys at that? LOL. This is what the Muse and I came up with anyway and were happy with. Opinions are welcomed.) SUMMARY: It is time for Mulder and Scully to move their relationship to a more intimate level, but there's one last barrier in the way. TIMESPAN/SPOILER WARNING: Sometime in season seven after "First Person Shooter". Also minor references to: "Lazarus", "Momento Mori", "Emily", "Pusher", "Redux trilogy", FTF, and "Millennium". ARCHIVE INFO: It goes to Gossamer through xff. Can be archived anywhere as long as my name, addy and disclaimer stay intact. FEEDBACK: I love it just as much as seeing M&S kiss. THANKS TO: Debbie, Suzanne, Gerry, Mac and Lisa. My website for all my X-Files fanfiction, thanks to the wonderful Skyfox, is now at http://tenxffic.iwarp.com DISCLAIMER: The X-Files, the episodes referred to, Mulder and Scully and all other characters from the show belong to Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen Productions and Fox Broadcasting, and are used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended, no profit will be gained. Characters not recognised from the show are mine. The X-Files: "Hestia's Awakening" (1/1) By Ten, March 3 - 14th, posted April 2000 xXx There was no single, simple catalyst responsible for the turn the evening took. While watching a video, their light conversation had become unexpectedly deeper. Mulder and Scully had finally and properly TALKED, and without one partner joking or deflecting or running away. They had cleared up so many misunderstandings. Broken down so many barriers. Made pledges. Declared their mutual love. Kissed. Kissed again. Then they were necking like they were in the back seat of a car or the back row of a movie theatre instead of on Scully's couch. Mulder sucked on the skin at the junction of Scully's neck and shoulder. She made a mental note to wear a shirt with a high collar to work on Monday. She pressed herself against his lips and body. When he raised his head, she pushed him down so that he was half- lying on the couch. She got off it and motioned for him to put his sock feet up on the couch too. He did so, then she climbed up on top of him. They kissed again. Mulder's hands were running along her back and occasionally stopping to cup her buttocks, but he was letting her set the boundaries. Now, that was the quandary - what boundaries did she want to set tonight? Stick to kissing, or to hell with the limits and strike out into the unknown instead? She lifted off him enough to pull his t-shirt out of his jeans and pull it up. He stripped it off. She settled back against his now- bare chest and inhaled his scent. She watched her fingers trace over his muscles. They had explored their feelings in words. Now it was time to explore them by touch. Mulder fingered her blouse gently. "Can I return the favour?" No hesitation. "Yes." They both took that item of clothing off her. Mulder stared at her satin-covered breasts, but he didn't reach out. She touched his face. "You have a beautiful mind, Mulder. I've loved experiencing it for years now. You also have beautiful hands and a beautiful mouth. I want to experience them too." She lifted his hand to the front of her bra. With that permission, he unhooked it, revealed her breasts, and moved forwards with reverence. xXx She was down to her panties and he was down to his boxer shorts. Their legs were tangled together, his right leg rubbing back and forth high up, tantalising her thighs and the juncture of her legs. One hand was at her breast, wonderfully manipulating a nipple, the other hand was tracing the elastic of her panties. She wanted them off, she wanted him on and in her. It was going to happen. It was going to happen soon, though perhaps slightly delayed if he first decided to pleasure her solely. That was fine. She wanted that. She wanted it all. But... There was one thing she hadn't told him. She had to tell him now, before her ability to deliver a decent sentence went any futher south. Speaking of south... Down south, Mulder's leg was driving her crazy. She wanted to take his hand and... No, she had to tell him this first. Now. Otherwise he would feel awful, even though it wasn't his fault. A secret she had kept for so long, that would have an impact on what they were about to do. "Mulder... Mulder, um, I have to tell you something..." His movements slowed to a degree, but didn't stop. "What?" he asked softly, partly distracted. "Well, um... It's..." Her nervousness broke through his happy hormone haze and he stopped, and looked worried. She swallowed. This was simple to say, so why couldn't she say it? "Mulder, I'm... You see..." She could see his vivid imagination coming up with all sorts of potential possibilities for her sudden hesitancy. "I'm..." Having my period? Uncertain? Uncomfortable? Having second thoughts? Thinking we should take things more slowly? Frigid? She tried again. "I've..." Changed my mind? Decided we should discuss contraception, protection, STDs, etc? He shifted his leg from between hers and lifted his hand off her breast. This was not going well. She had to put them both out of their panic. "I'm a virgin," she blurted out. Mulder's jaw dropped. After a very long silence, he stammered out, "But - Jack. You did a year with Jack Willis..." She felt herself going red, and mentally told herself off. Virginity was NOT a disease nor was it something to be ashamed of, not that Mulder was staring at her like she was a leper, but she had given him a shock. "I've only ever had outercourse, Mulder. And not until I knew my boyfriend well, so that I wasn't making any hasty, rash decisions." She paused for a moment. "Not that I've even had outercourse for centuries. When you and I both stepped into that basement office, we became like an order of monks." She smiled. "Oh." There was astonishment on her partner's face, but also a kind of relief in his eyes. She knew what he was thinking (and, knowing Mulder, then feeling guilty about thinking it), that some events he had feared in the past had not come to pass. He looked like he was absorbing what she had said. He nodded. "Scully, that's fine. Outercourse is fine with me, if that's what you want, and when you're ready." He touched her face. "It's just as good. It can be better. Good way to get to know each other too." She nodded in agreement, relieved that he understood. "I made my decision before I went to college. I want you to know why." He shook his head. "You don't have to explain your reasonings. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable." "But I WANT you to know." "Okay." He sat up and they seated themselves for the discussion. They were still panting a bit from their exertions. She smiled and blushed about them having this conversation under such circumstances and while topless, no less. "Sorry, Mulder. I guess this brought things to a grinding halt," Scully said wryly. She willed herself not to cross her arms over her breasts. There was nothing to hide anymore. Though it could be a distraction. He just chuckled and without a word reached down to the floor and handed her his t-shirt. She kissed him and put it on. Mulder beat her to speaking, saying, "I'm glad that you told me. I was going to take things slowly when we got to, you know, because I thought it had been a while, but still... I would have hated to have rushed in the heat of the moment and inadvertently hurt you." She nodded. "But it wouldn't have been your fault. It's not like we've ever said to each other on a stakeout: 'So, when did you lose your virginity?'" They chuckled. "I guess that my choice was partly a mix of my Catholic upbringing and my own degree of comfortableness until marriage. Also, as a medical student I was more aware than most women about the risks and that they were associated with both types of lovemaking. There were a few boyfriends that weren't happy with my stance and my insistence on protection if things reached certain stages." Mulder grinned. "So they quickly got shown the door?" "Or showed themselves out when they realised over time that I wouldn't be persuaded. And some of the patients I saw on my internship strengthed my resolve: people dealing with pregnancies, STDs and such." They both looked wistful when she mentioned the word 'pregnancy'. She was barren, a mother, and a virgin all in one. It was unlikely she could become pregnant in the natural way, but she did have her ova back - albeit that they were stored in two safe storage locations by friends of the Gunmen. This had happened several months ago - she and Mulder had been contacted by a small group of surviving Kurts (Mulder said they were clones. They looked like quads to her). The Kurts had been in hiding, but after the deaths of the inner ring of the Consortium there had been temporary chaos, giving them the opportunity to steal her stored ova - the 'control vials', ones that had not been tampered with. Only recently had the Kurts been able to risk contacting Mulder and Scully and make their surprise delivery. But the issue of children was something that had to be put aside for now, like the returned genetic material. It wasn't the time or place. Mulder got them back on track about her decision to stay a virgin. "I understand. That's fine with me. Really." Scully said, "I had to grow a lot as a person too. To reach the point where I could love someone without being closed off or guarding my emotions. I think that I've also been waiting for the right man to come along. I guess I knew somehow that Jack and the others weren't that man. They weren't you." He stared at her. When he finally did blink, his eyes were brighter. /Hope, tears, or both?/ She reached out for him. "I know you're the right one. That this is right. And I love you unconditionally. I'm ready now." He took her hand and kissed it. "As much as I have dreamed of hearing you say those words, I don't think we should rush into this. It's a big decision for you -" "Mulder, I'm sure!" "Let's get to know each other first, one stair at a time. Admitting that we love each other is a big enough step for the moment anyway. It took us three years to hold hands, four to hug and forehead kiss, five to plant a kiss lower than the forehead, six to try for a lip kiss, seven to actually GET the lip kiss... This courtship is pacing itself out. I can wait for the denouement!" "I don't think I can!" She tried to imitate his classic sulky pout. "Well, then let's concentrate on outercourse first, for several weeks at least, because I want you to be sure about going one step further. And it's a good idea for us to ease into this. Give us time to talk. Gives me time to romance you. And I can learn all about the outside first." He waggled his eyebrows, then sucked on the fingers he was still holding. She was somewhat mollified, and very touched. "And you probably prefer blow jobs anyway. No work and all play." He nearly choked on her index finger. Upon recovery, he said, "Really, Agent Scully? Well, let's put that theory to rest." He slid the t-shirt up and his mouth swooped down like an eagle to settle on a peak. His tongue lathed over a breast and she fell back against the couch cushions. "Let's push a few buttons on the outside, shall we...?" xXx A few weeks later: Dana Scully was not getting laid in the 'conventional' sense, but she was having (and giving) a fine time. She and her partner were stimulating each other's brain and body. Mulder had learned to play her like an instrument. He made her breasts sing and beg for his touch, whether it be of hand, mouth or just the feel of his bare chest. And what he did to her 'down below' made her body melt. "I want to know your body like you're a much loved and memorised book." And he was a voracious reader, a blind man reading Braille. Hands and tongue moving, always moving. Even his voice... One of their favourite things was to lie or sit holding each other and whispering in each other's ear. Tender. Hot. Memories. Jokes. Observations. Fantasies. Wishes. Pledges. Promises. All in all, aural sex. She was no slouch either. She may not have liked First Person Shooter games, but she had instinct when it came to handling a joystick. And his body... The muscles rippled like sand dunes, the plain of his stomach, a desert she was at last allowed to explore as a woman instead of as a doctor. And she brought growth to that desert. Mulder had even said that intercourse could wait until they were married, but as much as they did want to get married, that was far off. It was best to keep their relationship a secret for as long as they possibly could. Today they were dozing in each other's arms. Well, Mulder was dozing. Scully was awake and thinking. Very hard. Her vibes must have woken Mulder, because he opened his eyes and said, "Penny for 'em." /He asked for them.../ "Well, Mulder, the last weeks have been nothing if not wonderful. But more and more when we're making love, I want to feel you in me. I'm sure. This is what I want. I won't regret it." Mulder shifted on the bed. He looked somewhat miserable, which was not the expression she had exactly hoped for. What could be wrong? "Mulder?" He said, "It's just that... to do this I'm going to have to..." He sighed. "Once again I'm going to be the one who hurts you." "Mulder..." She sighed gently, and felt a little frustrated even as she was touched by his concern. "We've discussed these feelings of guilt before," Scully pointed out. /Though with Mulder's damaged psyche it looks like we're going to have to go through them again and again. And this is an area of guilt that we haven't exactly gone through. It doesn't quite compare to the conspiracy, but it is still personal pain, no matter how I absolve or convince him./ "Mulder, when it comes to losing virginity, pain is highly individual. For some it hurts a lot, some a little, some in between. Some not at all, because a woman can even break her hymen while exercising." He raised his eyebrows. "With WHAT? A carrot or a cucumber?" She folded her arms. "Mulder, we've gotten through so many barriers over the years, and especially in the last few weeks. This is another. We can do it. We can do 'me'." He lay there, considering, then rose up and moved towards her with definite intent and giving a look that made her bedroom curtains start to smoulder. Then, naturally, the phone rang. Duty called. And so for the next nine days, they were tied to an out of town case. Then when that was over, other work and various other delays cropped up, some social and biological in nature. xXx Eleven days after that Mulder's apartment: Scully was determined that tonight would be the night. No more cases, no more 'I want you to be SURE', no more female biological cycle getting in the way, no more family stuff... Yes, she would accept more joys of outer loving, sure, that was a great state to be in. But it was time. Mulder was in the kitchen. Scully shifted some books so that she could sit down, saw the titles, and found to her surprise that Mulder had been doing some research on what they were planning to do, highlighting a section in a book that suggested a 'slow penetration' method of entry as the most painless. She wondered, not for the first time, whether Mulder's uncertainty about taking this next step had origins in his own sexual past. Had one of his previous lovers been one of the percentage of women who unfortunately found the first time unbearably painful? Mulder came in and saw what she was looking at. He had a sheepish expression. "Just wanted to make sure my knowledge was up to date. Research the best way to go about it." She put the book down, stood up and crossed over to him. She took his hand. "I'll show you the best way. Right now." There was still a degree of hesitancy in his eyes. "Scully, this is something that once it's done..." "Mulder, do it. Less talk, more action." She led him into his bedroom. And, together, they found their way. xXx Half an hour later: "Scully?" Mulder's voice came softly, tentatively, in her ear as he held her. She opened her eyes and smiled reassuringly at him. She felt sore, but glad. And touched at how gentle Mulder had been with her, successfully battling his body's wish to surrender to baser instincts and self-absorption. "Mulder, I don't regret it." He looked relieved, but still worried. "Yes, it did hurt, but it certainly wasn't painful enough to have me stop what we were doing! Or not to want to do it again. Or to rush to church and repent." He kissed her mouth. "Good." "Now we have an expanded sexual repertoire at our disposal," she said, tracing his lips. "In a few hours, after some rest, I want to pull out an old favourite." "Looking forward to it." xXx Scully's apartment Ten days later Morning: Scully got out of bed, and wobbled slightly as she stood. Her legs felt like those of a new-born fawn. She steadied herself carefully and put on her robe, fumbling with the cord. She looked across at her partner, who was sprawled, indolently asleep, along the mattress, hogging two pillows but not a scrap of sheet. In a daze, Scully wandered out into the living room and stood near the couch, as if deciding what to do. Aimlessly, she turned on the TV, then headed in the direction of the refrigerator. Water. Water was good. She poured then swallowed a large glass. Behind her a cartoon character announced loudly, "Whoah! What a humdinger!" "I know the feeling..." Scully breathed. No, that wasn't true. She had NEVER known the feeling she had experienced in that last session with Mulder. Their third time together in that way. Back from a successfully completed case, they had rushed to the bedroom, dropping their FBI personas but not their joy at a job well done. The 'job well done' had continued into their session. In unexpected ways. Still trying to regain her sense of equilibrium, Scully turned the TV off and drifted to the picture window. She opened the curtains, filling the living room with light. A jogger was running by. She wanted to yell out to him triumphantly, "Hey! I have a G- spot!" but she could just imagine how he would react. She blushed. She still felt the need to say it though, to announce it to the world. Dana was still in shock. She knew that a G-spot was a very individual thing. In some women, it was no trick at all to find it, in others they (or their partner) might never find it. Debate raged in academic circles (and around tables in cafes) about whether this sexual Holy Grail actually existed, or was simply part of clitoral stimulation. All Scully knew was that SOMETHING had gone 'kapow' when Mulder was thrusting into her, and in a way that was more enhanced than her other orgasms. Clitoral orgasms had been like ringing the doorbell. This was like striking a gong. Or to go back to the melt analogy, the former was like her body was melting into pure pleasure, but the latter made the stars melt too. Such pleasure wasn't like that for everyone, and for some the clitoral orgasm was the stronger one. Just like the variance of first-time pain. But Scully was glad that she had drawn this particular card in her cosmic deck. A G-spot. They hadn't even been looking for the little bugger. Serendipity. An X-File. Whatever. Not that clitoral orgasms were anything to sneeze at. /I certainly don't sneeze at them! Moan, gasp or yelp, yes! I wonder if what I felt last night was enhanced because it was another level in expressing our intimacy and love, or the wait, or because he's 'the one', or because everything was 'just right', or what? Who knows?/ And she knew they would find that spot again. Perhaps not every time, but frequently. She heard Mulder padding across the hardwood floor on his bare feet. He enfolded her in his arms from behind. She leaned back against him. "I have a G-spot." "So I found out." His lips were in her ear. "Anyway, of course you have one - you're a G-woman." He turned her around and regarded her thoughtfully. "Why is it called a 'G' spot anyway? Is it because when it gets hit right, you scream 'Oh geeeee!'?" He adopted a high falsetto. She adopted a mock right hook. "For your information, it is named after the gynaecologist who discovered it, Ernst Graffenburg." "Trust you to know that. I bet he enjoyed his research." "Shut up and enjoy this, Mulder." She pulled his face down and kissed the playful leer away. When their lips finally unlocked, she said, "Well, if mine is the 'geeee' spot, then what's yours? The 'ohgodsculleeyes' spot?" He clamped his mouth over his retort (and laughter) and instead maintained great decorum to enquire, "Do I get finder's rights to yours?" "You get twenty-four hour a day access, when convenient, or at least frequent visiting rights." "Are those rights claimable at this moment? Not that doing things on the outer isn't still great fun." "Well, I was going to have a shower and then fix breakfast..." "We can have the shower together, then I'll fix breakfast." /Hmmm, I get the shower, more sex, and food cooked for me. I win on all sides./ "Deal." Soon they were in the shower. "I want to try out your B-spot," Mulder announced. "What's that...?" "Like your G-spot, only higher up." And with that he affixed his mouth to her left breast. His action helped stifle her laugh. "I like your thinking... And your doing..." "Likewise, Agent Scully. Likewise." Then for a moment his seductive intent was gone and he rose up to gently brush her wet hair off her face. "I'm glad I was your first man." "First, last and only." With that complete truth, she drew his lips down to hers. THE END.