From: ladybug101@att.net
Date: Tue, 01 May 2001 22:00:04 +0000
Subject: New:HoldingFlashback(1/1)RachelFreeman
Source: direct

TITLE: Holding Flashback
AUTHOR: Rachel Freeman 
EMAIL ADDRESS: ladybug101@att.net
DISTRIBUTION STATEMENT: Go ahead, ask, and use my name~ 
RATING: G
CLASSIFICATION: Vinette, MSR, a bit of pain.  
KEYWORDS: "In his arms"
SPOILER WARNING: Anything from FTF to the end of the 
season8, trailers. 
SUMMARY: Interesting Take, Birthing, Dream, Just Read



Held him in my arms, knowing we were now safe. Knowing I 
was safe he could sleep. Undoubtably he'd been running 
non-stop to find me. What did he have to do? 
Sigh...Where was I? I look around, he's still clamped in 
my arms. I know it's cold and icy, I feel it. But God! 
Hills and Mountains of snow, ice, and wind, so immense. 
It's so peaceful, half of me wishes to wake him up, so 
we could enjoy this together...my sensible brain setting 
in...would we ever get out of here? I really don't care, 
just all to perfect running my fingers through Mulder's 
hair. Getting lazy, my brain starts going...what really 
happened to me? I start piecing the fragments together, 
the only thing that isn't hazy is standing in Mulder's 
hallway, we almost kissed...almost.  

I feel him move, realize he's waking up, I know he'll 
tell me what happened, so, I wonder just how much time 
had passed. I whisper, "we better look for some 
shelter," Mulder looks up and over to the closest hill 
of rock and gets up, he pulls me up as well. I guess I'm 
weaker then I think, I teeter under his grasp, or maybe 
it's just looking in those eyes, and through the snow. 
Together we stumble to the rocks, our arms around each 
other holding tight, I guess we just don't want to loose 
each other again. 

He raises his face up into the sun to beckon me to start 
climbing, so I do supported by him. I'm cold without his 
touch but I continue climbing. We get over the rocks, 
and Mulder tells me to stay here, I see there's a snow-
cat thing a bit off, I guess it's got some gear in it, I 
sit down, but impulsively I pull him back, he falls to 
the ground, I fall on his chest. I just want his arms 
around me right now. 
	
"Dana, PUSH," is what I hear, Agent Rheys is screaming 
at me. I wake back to reality,  and the pain comes back 
too. I'm in a cabin, on a bed, giving birth to my child, 
and hopefully Mulder's too. I know he'll accept it 
anyway or how. I don't even know conception, was it a 
miracle?  Now more then ever I wish he could hold me, I 
know he's fighting for me again. I want to be in his 
arms again, to help me quell what's bursting inside, the 
apprehension, what is this child? It is a child? God, 
let it be, let it be Mulder's. The only thing I'm sure, 
I know it's his when I'm in his arms, I know its his. 
Save me again Mulder...save me again.