****************************************************************************** This author's email address has changed. Please use: ****************************************************************************** Subject: I Lost My Heart In A Darkened Room (1/1) Date sent: Mon, 17 Nov 1997 19:17:23 -0000 Title: I Lost My Heart In A Darkened Room Author: Alisha Rating: R Classification: VRH Spoilers: Various third and fourth season Keywords: Mulder/Scully Summary: Scully has claustrophobia, Mulder has big hands, and all the lights ha ve gone out. xoxox Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully and Skinner and everyone else belong to Chris Carter etc. No infringement intended. Rating: I planned to write NC17. I *tried* to write NC17. But the format of the story was really difficult to write graphically with, so it's just R. Dedication: This is to everyone who finishes this story. Please finish this story - pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease? It's not a lot to ask - it's not a long story or anything. Feedback: Think of all the times you've written a story and had zip feedback, and how bad you feel about it. Now click on your 'send mail', cut and paste, and tell me something nice. xoxox I Lost My Heart In A Darkened Room By Alisha xoxox "It's really dark in here." "I think the bulb's gone." "Fuck." "Stop leaning on me, you're really heavy." "I can't move anywhere else - I'm right up against the wall." "This is the most stupid situation I've ever been in - in my *entire* life, Mulder." "What about the time I caught you about to do the wild thing with Van Blundht. That was a bit more stupid." "Maybe - - - but you can understand how I got into that situation. This.... this... this is just *ridiculous*. *This* is stupider." "*Stupider*? Scully, are you drunk?" "No.... no I just get a little claustrophobic. I'll end up saying something stupid.... It's horrible." "Really?" "Uh huh." "I never knew that. What about the time you crawled through that vent to save me from that spooky guy?" "Well, I'm okay if I keep moving or keep talking. Oh Mulder..... this is horrible. I mean, how did we end up locked in the stationery cupboard - wedged between the jumbo glue sticks and the Xerox paper? It's stupid." "Well, I'll keep you talking." "Okay." "Truth or dare?" "I'm not playing truth or dare. It's too dangerous." "Well, I'd suggest spin the bottle but there's really not enough room in this corner. So do you want a truth or a dare?" " I guess I have to pick truth." "Oooookaaay..... How many men have you slept with in the last year?" "I decline." "You can't." "I can. I can decline and take a dare instead." "Okay - I dare you to tell me how many men you have slept with in the last year." "I still decline." "Double dare, then. I double dare you to tell me how many men you have slept with in the last year." "Give up Mulder." "Treble dare?" "No. Ask me another truth." "I don't want to." "Don't be such a baby." "*I'm* not the one being the baby, Scully." "Fine." "....................-" "....................-" "Hey, don't you need to keep talking?" "Kind of, yeah." "Okay. So how do you propose we get out of here?" "Well Mulder, I guess we just have to wait until somebody needs the paper replacing in the Xerox machine." "That machine's been out of order for nearly a year now, Scully." "Then we wait until somebody needs a jumbo glue stick." "If I could just move around slightly..... like this.... maybe I can get us out of here..." "It's no good, Mulder, I've got my foot stuck behind the shelving unit. It's caught on my stockings." "Scully - you're wearing stockings?" "Well... yeah, Mulder. Why?" "Stockings with suspenders?" " Is that a jumbo glue stick in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?" " Truth or dare, Scully?" "Oh.... truth." "Very good choice. Have you ever considered having sex with Skinner?" "Never in my whole career have I encountered such a *stupid* question before. The answer is no. Truth or dare?" "Hmm.... truth, I think." "Have you ever considered having sex with Marita?" "Marita Covarrubias? Didn't you know, Scully? She's gay." "Really?" "Really." "Nobody ever tells me these things." "I thought you knew." "Well, I didn't. So what else have I been kept in the dark about?" "Nothing - - as far as I know." "Well, tell me everything you know, and there's bound to be something I didn't know." "Well, Skinner's sleeping with his secretary, who is also sleeping with the guy who services the chicken soup machines." "Naughty!" "I know. There's not really much else I don't think." "Who's Pendrell sleeping with?" "Well, nobody. I should have thought that was obvious." "Why? Is he gay too?" "No, Scully! He's carrying a torch for you the size of.... the size of... of..." "Of a jumbo glue stick?" "Yeah." "Weird. I never knew." "Well now you do, are you gonna ask him out?" "Mulder, what would Skinner say if he found out I was seeing somebody I work with." "He'd be a jealous hypocrite." "True. Let's play I Spy." "Scully, we're in a pitch black stationery cupboard." "I'll go first. I spy with my little eye, something beginning with.... D." "......Darkness?" "No." "Scully, there's nothing else to see in the room." "Sure there is. I'll give you a clue. I spy with my little eye, something beginning with D.K.S." "Dana Katherine Scully?" "Yeah, you win. Your turn!" "Scully, how can you see yourself? I'm standing right in front of you and I can't even see you." "Well, if I close my eyes I can see the inside of my eyelids." "Then you should have said T.I.O.M.E-L." "Well, you'd never have got that." "Scully, are you okay? The claustrophobia kicking in?" " A little. Keep talking." "Okay - tell me about when you lost your virginity." "I was sixteen - his name was Ken." " No kidding?" "What's in a name, *Fox*?" "Never mind that. Where did you do it?" "On my parents' bed. It's a bit of a clich that, isn't it?" "A bit." "How about you?" "I'm not telling." "Fair enough." "Hey! You're supposed to argue with me." "Sorry. Oh please tell me Mulder, please!" "I'm not going to now. Hey, you're breathing fine!" " Don't remind me of that, Mulder. Talk to me." "Talk dirty?" "Mulder, your idea of dirty is far beyond me." "Have you ever wondered what might have happened if we'd just had sex, out there on the office floor, the first time we met?" "Is that your idea of dirty?" "No, seriously Scully." "Well - - - not exactly. I mean, sure I've thought about what might happen - - - It's really weird telling you this." "Well, if we're going to die here in this cupboard, we might as well confess now before it's too late." " In that case, I'd like to confess that back when we first started to work together, I sort of had a crush on you. " "Any fantasies?" "Mulder, I'm not that honest - even on my so-called deathbed." "What would you do if I kissed you right now?" "Well, assessing the situation - there's not much I could do. It's not like I could run away or anything." "I'd stop if you told me to." "That's highly unlikely. Are you going to kiss me or not?" "Oh, okay." ".................." ".................." "Mulder....." "Do you want me to take your skirt off, or just pull it up?" "Off." "Where's the zipper?" "It's buttons.... At the side..... This is no good, I can't see a fucking thing." "Okay... I'll tell you what's going on." " Oh, okay." " I'm.... I'm taking your skirt off. And your stockings... Hey! You're not wearing suspenders!" "I never said I was. Get on with it." "All right... I'm pulling your stockings down... it's *not* easy.... What are these, Barbie doll size?" "Okay so they're a bit small. All the others were laddered. Hurry up." "Calm down! This isn't easy, you know. We have very limited space." "The moment is slipping away...." "Okay, but you don't have to just stand there." "Fine. I can't find your zipper." " When *was* the last time you had sex, Scully?" " I got it. Why is it so damn *dark* in here?" "We already established that, Sculleeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" "That's good, huh?" "Oh... yeah." "" "Are you ready?" "Mmm hmm... you have really big hands, Mulder." "Well you know what they say." "I'm not sure I want to..... ." "" "Mulder...." "................." "................." "................." "................." "Scully!" "...................erk.." "SCULLEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "Oh..." "*SCUUUUU - - - LLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*." "Ahh..." "" "" "I only came in here... looking for a red biro..." "Well... aren't you glad I came with you?" "Whoo, yeah." "So, erm... what.... do we do...... now?" "You mean in life, or in this stock cupboard?" "Both. I'm dying for a cigarette." "I can give you a jumbo glue stick, if that's any good." "Mulder, you can give me a hell of a lot more than a glue stick. But I don't think any blood is getting to my toes." "Have you tried taking your shoe off?" "I can't." "Why?" "My feet might smell. " "You're getting claustrophobia again." "What... what if I get pregnant? What if I get fired....? What if... what if nobody comes to get stationery ever again?????" "Calm down and put your underwear back on." "YOU STUPID SONOFABITCH!!!!! I'M FUCKING CLAUSTROPHOBIC AND YOU'RE JUST ALL 'Oooh, Sculleee, put your underwear on'... MEN - YOU'RE ALL THE SAME! I'M COMMITTING SUICIDE.... " " Ssssh, Scully, You need to take deep breaths, and... *and* put your underwear back on." "Ahem" "" "" "Who's there?" "It's... it's me, Agent Pendrell." " The bulb's gone, Pendrell." "No it hasn't - AAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH." "OHMYGOD!" "Run, Scully, run!!!!!" xoxox One Week Later xoxox "Scully?" "Hi, Mulder, come in. How is he?" "Well, they say he'll never be able to work in the bureau again. The stress of seeing... that.... was just too much for him." "Well, maybe we should send him a card at the mental institute or something." "Maybe. Poor Pendrell." "Speaking of gifts though... I got you one." "For me??!?!!?" "It's nothing big." " Oh, Scully! A red biro! You realise this means we don't have to go into the stock cupboard for some time, don't you ?" " Well, Mulder, you'll be pleased to know that I've hidden all your paperclips." "That's my girl." xoxox The End xoxox Well, that's the whole all! I didn't know how to end it, so I ended it crappily and sappily. The perfect mixture. Sorry it was a bit cruel to Pendrell. I really don't hate him quite as much as it might seem. Feedback, flames, marriage proposals, and cash donations to xoxox