From: Jewlz! Date: Tue, 23 Feb 1999 03:48:58 -0500 Subject: New!! "I Need To Know" (1/?) I Need To Know (1/4) Author: Jewlz! aka Julie Authors Notes: sorry I've been away for so long. Writers block and all..but this idea kept biting me and I have given in.. :) I'm back! Archive: As long as my name is on it.... Characters: M, Sc, Sk, and others. Classification: M/S UST, Mulder torture, violence, ANGST! Disclaimer: I'm just borrowing them for awhile...I'll won't hurt 'em much :) hehe All XF characters belong to 1013 productions and Chris Carter!! Feedback: I'm always hungry! jewlz@vnet.net Rating: NC-17 for slight sexual situations, R for disturbed thoughts Spoilers: Takes place after One Son Summary: My orders......to kill Special Agent Mulder. X-tra: just a little note: The following is a story about a "me" I often envision..but it is not really me. I have never read any fan-fic like this, so this is a new idea to me. I hope you read it and enjoy. I Need To Know Feb. 22, 1999 11:21 am Bad Rock, North Carolina Wimple's One-Stop Shop I see them. The tall one is flailing his arms in the air, trying to make a point. He is right good-looking, I must add. I watch his trench coat blow wildly in the wind. His face is sweet and fresh. His actions are strange and I *know* that he must *know*. He is talking to another agent. A rather petite red-head. She is very beautiful, of that which I can see from this distance. Her face shows that she is listening to him, yet not agreeing with him. Her face lightens up when he smiles at her. He touches her lightly on the shoulder. Even from my car, I can see the delicate balance between the two. Suddenly the woman becomes enraged at something he says. Now it is *her* turn to flail her arms in the wind. She seems to yell something at him. He sighs and gives up. He looks away from her back down the road. She points the other way and tries to get him to look, but he doesn't look. He continues to stare down the road, as if he could *see* it. She finally sighs and goes back to the car. I watch *him*. He doesn't notice me because of the trees. I wonder if he can feel my presence. Finally he too gives up. He walks back to the car and gets in the driver's seat. The car is set to go. They had fueled when they pulled up. Now they were going to go her way. **************************************************************************** Mulder ran his hand through his hair. "What now?" he muttered to himself. Scully caught his look. "I know how you feel, Mulder, but the store manager said this way. East. As in East. Not west." "And how many times have I been wrong?? Come on, Scully? I have a gut instinct that we are headed the wrong way. What do you hope to find here anyway? We are so far off course.." Mulder's voice was getting raspy from the cold wind. "How do *you* know? How? What makes you so right?" Scully threw the case file down on the seat between them frustrated. "Yes, O wise one you are....you are so wonderful to point that out to me.." Mulder knew he was getting snippy with her, but he couldn't help it. The case file said they needed to go to east along route 7, but he felt deep inside they were wasting their time. "We have to find it, Scully. We have to find it before nightfall or else. We are losing time." Mulder banged his fist on the wheel for effect. Scully winced. She hated when he got like this. Always following the drum beat that she could never hear. Always asking her to *trust* him, to put her faith in him, never knowing where they would end up. "Mulder? This contact of yours....do you have any idea who it could be? I mean all the other contacts were...well..we can say that we never knew *if* we could trust them or not. How can you be sure this time?" "Because this time, we got proof! Scully, this is the first time that we can truly say we are close to this. I need this. We figured this out so far, we only need to find the exact place." Scully sighed again for the umpteenth time that day. Ever since the following morning, they had been tracking a set of clues that supposedly is to lead them to the key. The key to all things. The key to the X-files. First it was just a keyring found on Mulder's desk. A keyring with Gibson Praise's picture on it. So Mulder ran a fingerprint lab test and revealed it had a man named Jim Parson's fingerprints on it. While interviewing Parson, he said he knew about the secret base. A base where the talented ones were tested on. Parson was expecting their visit, and wanted to be safe. He said *they* would be after him because he knew too much. He was too scared to even do more than just simply give the location of the base. After he gave Mulder the location he shot himself in the head. Dead. Suicide. Mulder was intrigued. Now they were trying to find this one last road. The road that would lead to the secret base. But it was impossible. It was well covered up. Not even all their tracking skills could help this time. Scully asked the man in the store, giving a description of the road. She said east. Mulder was saying west...but science was the voice of reason...for now.. **************************************************************************** I followed them as discreetly as I could. I had hoped they wouldn't notice. Thank god they were headed the wrong direction. After I got *the call* from the boss with the warning of them, it had become *my* freakin' job to get them out of town. Of course I wouldn't have to do anything drastic now. I felt relieved. Boss said I had to kill Mulder *if* he got too close. I smiled to myself. That man sure was good-looking. Damn! I wish he were mine! Enough! I scolded myself. I had to make sure they were on the wrong track. I had to make sure they didn't turn around. If they did....I would have kill them. And I didn't really want to since it was sunny out. I kept the car steady, keeping a close eye on them. Suddenly, the car turned around! Noooo! I moaned to myself and watched as they drove by me in the other direction. NNOOOO! I waited a few minutes, then turned around to go after them. No..NO..NO! I hated myself for this. Why didn't I do something?? I sped up to catch up with them. Did they know? Did he guess?? Boss said that he was a criminal profiler, and one of the best agents ever! He must have guessed about me too! Now it was my fault! I *had* to do something now! They sped up too, so I guess they knew about me. Well, it was bound to happen. They would have seen me anyway. It was all-out war time now!! They could *not* find that base! I couldn't let them! It was either them...or me. And I *knew* I wasn't gonna die that day.... **************************************************************************** "Faster Mulder!! They are gaining on us!" Scully yelled at Mulder. As soon as Mulder noticed the car pulling out at the station, he *knew* they were being followed. Which made his decision to go 'west' overrule Scully's 'east' direction. And when saw the black car coming up fast behind them, they knew it was definitely *not* the welcoming committee! "Scully, put your seat belt on tight....and hold on!" Mulder had done some really weird things with cars before, but this was insane. Scully noticed the speed dial flip over to 90. The black car was gaining fast. "Mulder...hurry..." Scully had turned around and started punching numbers into her cell phone. Mulder watched her out the corner of his eye. She looked cute with that exotic look in her eyes. He made a quick mental note to laugh and tell her this later on. He wouldn't forget. "This is Special Agent Dana Scully requesting immediate back-up..." Crash!! Before she could finish talking, the black car had crashed into the back of their rental car, throwing their heads back in a small whiplash fashion. Mulder felt a slight sting for a second and risked a glance at Scully to see if she was ok. He saw fear reflected in her eyes and he had wanted to say something to comfort her. Then she screamed at him. "Mulder!! Watch out!!" Scully saw the tree coming quickly at them, a silent scream coming out of her mouth before they hit...... **************************************************************************** Wheww! I wiped the sweat off my brow. That was close....I thought I was a goner there for a sec. I had stopped my car in time before it had joined the other helpless car that had made friends with an oak tree. I breathed a sigh of relief. Wow..I couldn't believe I just did that!! I made them crash! I should have been excited, but I wasn't. I felt bad. Suddenly, I wanted to go see if they were alive. I know my boss would have told me too. I would have hated to kill them, but it was the good of humanity. I mean, they were of the government! They could expose the project! And that would mean, I would be exposed. I had to keep myself hidden. I got out anyway, against my wishes. I slowly walked over to the rental car. Checking out the scenery calmed my nerves. Long country road, leading to nowhere. A farm here, a farm there. Here a farm, there a farm, everywhere a farm farm. Ok..I'm getting riduculous. But I wanted to avoid checking them out. I didn't want to know if they were alive.....if they were....well, I put my hand on my pistol. I had to be ready for anything. I saw her first. Blood. OHmyh god!! Blood all over her face. A steady stream pouring down her forehead. I freaked! I can't do it! I wanted to run...run back to my car...and just get out of there...but the blood.. I realized as I neared her side of the car, she had hit her head on the side window. That is where the blood oozed. I couldn't tell if she were alive or not. I quickly put on my gloves and reached to check her pulse. Whew! She was alive! Oh no....If she were alive.... I went to the other side and checked the man. Special Agent Fox Mulder. What a Fox! He was also unconscious. No blood, but a large bruise on his forehead as well. His head had hit the steering wheel. No bag?? O well. I checked his breathing and pulse. Pulse...weak..but there anyway. A small part of me was happy they weren't dead. Another part of me...well....I did have my orders. I was the highest in the specially trained group. Boss respected me the most. He always teased my hair and style of dresses. And he looooved my black cat suit I used in B and R. He was boss. He said he would protect me and keep me safe. Just like the others. He had told me that one day......he would help me find my parents. He told me that he loved me... I had to do it. They had to die. No more choices. They had to die right now... The project had to be protected. There was no other way. I took out the pistol and clicked off the safety. I pointed it at his head. He groaned. I shivered. I couldn't do it. I chickened out! He was *alive*. I wasn't a murderer!! He groaned again. My hand shook violently. He groaned more. He moved a little. He opened his eyes. And looked at me. He looked into my soul. I waited. Suddenly...I heard sirens! NOOOOOO!! Not now!! Here I was making the biggest decision of my lifetime, and now the cops were here! My eyes flicked over to her. And that's when I saw it. Her cell phone. Damn!! I looked back at him. His eyes seemed to gulp me up. He saw the gun. He *knew*. And now the sirens were getting louder. I had to make a choice. I raised the gun. Turned it around. those eyes.... I slammed the butt of the gun on his head. He was out. Again. End part One. Disclaimer and other things in Part 1. I Need To Know (2/4) by Jewlz! Feb. 23, 1999 8:16 am Hot Springs, North Carolina Cool Breeze Motel: Room 22 I watched him breathe. I had hoped the ropes weren't too tight on his arms. I hated rope burns myself. After I put him in my car, I ran. Luckily the police didn't arrive in time to view my get-a-way. I mean *our* get-a-way. I smiled as he groaned awake. "Where am I?" He slurred at me. I watched him struggle a bit with his ropes. His eyes held confusion. I tenderly let my hand slide down the side of his cheek. This finally got his attention. *Now* he was alert. "You." That was all he said. His eyes bored down deep in my soul. It was if he could see my emotions, my feelings, my innermost thoughts. His voice was raspy and soon he was coughing. I jumped up from the bed and went to stand behind him. I pounded a little on his back until he was through. I let my hands drift casually down his back. He felt so strong, and I could feel the tension in him as he winced under my soft touch. "Yes, me. I knew you had figured me out." I turned around to sit back on the edge of the bed. Mulder was tied to the motel chair. It was soft, yet I knew he was still uncomfortable. "Why? Why did you run us off the road? Why didn't you kill me when you had the chance?" Mulder's eyes glared at me so riveting, I had to look away. I got up again and started pacing. "Agent Mulder...I can call you Mulder, right?" I risked a smile at him to gauge his reaction. He didn't smile. I ran a hand through my light brown hair. I had a sudden desire to seduce this man. YYeess..I wanted him. "Where's my partner? Why didn't you get her too?" "She's dead. I left her body in the car." I had lied, and now I felt even worse. There was a brief painful look in his eyes for a second, now it was gone. "I don't believe you. You're a liar," he stated simply. Now he owned a defiant glare to add to the other hard-core glares he was sending me. "where is she??" I faced the wall. There was no way I could let him know otherwise. That I was in such a hurry I couldn't kill her. Or maybe it was an excuse. "I need to know." Mulder just sat there quietly. Staring. Staring at me. Oh god...was i gonna have to get him a blindfold? "No Mulder. I won't tell you until you tell me something. I need to know what you know." I got close to him again. I got up in his face. My lips grazed his ear. I whispered in his ear, "What do you know about it?" Mulder was silent and held his ground. I had a theory forming in my mind. If I could prove that he didn't know about the project, then I could let him go. That way I wouldn't have to kill him. Or her. Or either. "Tell me, Special Agent Fox....tell me and you live. It's very simple, I just need to know." I sat back down on the bed facing him. Feeling a hot flush crossing my face, I undid one of my buttons on my black shirt. I watched his eyes follow my fingers. At least I knew he was watching me. "My hands hurt." Mulder said in a monotone voice. "Well? I suppose you want me to undo the ropes?" I chided him. "that would be mighty kind of you madam," he chided back at me. I smiled and replied, "Nope." ************************************************************************ Feb. 23. 1999 10:13 am Bad Rock, North Carolina C. Dawson Memorial Hospital Special Agent Dana Scully moved her hand up to touch her head. Her hair was awful looking, and now she had a headache to end all other headaches ever! She glanced over at the window and noticed how bright the morning seemed. "Agent Scully!" Scully looked up to see her boss standing at the door. She watched him make his way in the room and took her hand in his. "I just heard a couple of hours ago. I jumped the first flight I could." He seemed to stumble on his next words a little. "There's been no sign of him, although they still are checking the car out for prints." She saw his eyes glaze for a brief moment. He added, "We'll find him Scully. It's only a matter of time." Scully nodded her appreciation at him, for fear of crying if she tried to speak. The thought of Mulder alone was almost enough to kill her. She could almost feel his pain. Her lips and chin trembled just thinking he might be dead. She felt Skinner's reassuring squeeze on her fingers. "I'm going to help." Scully started to rise out of the bed, but Skinner stopped her. He gently, but firmly, made her lie back down. "I've got to help look for him sir!! You don't understand....." "No...I will *not* let you out of here. You have been in a serious car wreck. Besides...you're to close to this. Another agent has been assigned to this. We are going to find him, Scully. Trust me.." Scully watched her boss leave the room, no doubt giving orders for someone to watch her that she doesn't try to leave. Yet, thought's of Mulder's abduction erupted her soul. He was her partner. He *had* to be ok. He just *had* to. Or else.... ********************************************************************** The cool smoothness and the hard sharpness of the gun gave him nightmares. At least she had let him go to the bathroom. He splashed cold water on his face. He let the riverlets run down his chest and bent over to swallow some more water. He thought he may be getting a cold, since the weather was freezing. Cold air, yet a sunshiny day. How odd? he thought. And how the hell do I get away from psycho chick?? That girl had some nerve!! Pulling a gun on *him*! He shook his head, relishing the new feeling in his arms. Those ropes had hurt! Mulder stood against the wall and sighed. He closed to eyes and tried to remain calm. He let his breathing take over his body and started thinking. First of all, she wasn't going to kill him. Of that he was relieved. If she had wanted them dead, she would have killed them when she had the chance. But now, for some reason, she only took him. Why? Does this have to do with Gibson Praise? What does *she* know about the consortium? Is she in with them? I need to figure her out, I need to know. There was a knock on the door signaling his time up. He opted to make a run for it, but she had the gun. She seemed rather experienced with it too. No, I can't leave when I don't know if she knows what happened to Scully. If Scully was somewhere, she would know. I *had* to find out. Mulder let the girl lead him back to the chair. "NO! No chair..please." He gave her a glance of unwanting and she seemed to reason with it. Finally she led him to the bed instead. Ropes gone from sight, she took his hands and held them to the head of the bed. When he heard a click sound, he realized she used his handcuffs. At least now I'm comfortable. He had slept many a night on his couch in his own apartment, always lying on his back. Now he felt maybe he could persuade other things from her. The old trick, "I must get her to trust me so she will let me go" floated in his mind. Right now, it was the only choice he had. ************************************************************************* Assistant Director Walter Skinner met the detective at the scene. The two seemed to both be interested in the case. Skinner made it known that *all* precautions be taken and *all* officers are to stay on top of this until the missing agent was found. Skinner sighed at the report so far. Blood of Agents Scully and Mulder found only. No prints other than the agents. Tire tracks on driver's side of car. A few loose brown hair strands, could be Mulder's. Lastly, unidentified black paint scratches on back bumper. No clues as to which direction the black car would have gone, or how many people involved in the abduction. There had to more to this. Skinner ordered a test to be done on the hair. It was the only clue they had. ************************************************************************** "What's your name?" Mulder asked. Why the hell should I tell you? "You think I'm that gullible? Aren't you afraid I still might kill you?" I shuffled around in my bag. Where is it?? "I think that a young girl like you, running scared, you should trust me. I can help you." Mulder let the words come out like a steady stream of water. Cool...easy....carefree. Yeah right! Where was it?? I know I put it in here... "Scared?? Me?? You got me all wrong!" I continued to search, feeling those eyes on me again. Damn those eyes! I looked up. I couldn't resist. I felt a connection to him. He was drawing me in. His eyes talked to me. Pleading with me. Let me help you...I can help you.....I wanted to reach out to him. I wanted to run my fingers through his hair. I wanted to taste his body. I wanted to let him hold me. To comfort me. To tell me it was ok. To warm my body. To seek out my hidden places, places that have remained untouched by anyone but me. He could soothe me, soothe my soul.... NOOO!! I screamed at myself! I couldn't let him do this. I tore my eyes away from him and tried to search my bag again. My fingers found what they needed. It was a long, sharp instrument. It would inject the truth serum in him. It would make him talk to me, and tell me what I needed to know. I found the bottle and put the fluid in the needle. I saw Mulder's eyes as I went over to him. Now they scared. Now they pleaded me to let him go. But he was too valuable. "I need to know what you know," I told him as I injected the serum in his neck. I heard his scream and covered it up. His eyes glazed. Now.....there was no stopping it. And he began to talk. End part 2....part 3 coming soon... Disclaimer and other stuff in Part one. I Need To Know (3/4) by Jewlz! Feb. 23, 1999 1:23 pm Hot Springs, North Carolina Cool Breeze Motel: Room 22 I stuck the needle hard in his neck. Poor thing! I saw a few tears straggle down his face. I hurt him!! "Oowwww!" Mulder yelled at me. I didn't mean to hurt him!! I only wanted him to cooperate with me. Instead of apologizing to him, I let the hot liquid fire run through his veins. After an hour went by, I knew he was ready. I sat with him face to face. "What do you know about the project?" I asked him. "Whaaaa...whoo.." Mulder looked dazed, just right in my opinion. "What do you know?? Tell me everything," I whispered to him. "Jim Parson...he told us..." "What???? What did he tell you??" The lying back-stabbing freak! I *knew* Jim couldn't be trusted, I knew it! "he told us the location of the facil..facili..facilwity..." Mulder's speech was waving for a bit. He was totally in dreamland now, and he spilling his guts.. "i knew it! Well, what else?" "nothing....where's Sculleeeeeee?" Scully? So that was her name, the red-head. I knew he wanted to know about her but still.. "Scullleeeee.." Mulder moaned again and his eyes rolled back into his head. I started to feel weird again. I felt that I hated to do this. Yet, my boss was stronger than he was. I wondered if they found it. "Noo..." he answered, and then he was out like a baby. Soundly sleeping. At least I had the decency to cover him up. He had chill bumps on his arms, poor thing. I watched him breath for a few minutes and then turned the curtains in so the light wouldn't wake him. Was I becoming attached to him? What was it about *this* man that attracted me so? Those eyes of course, and his cute nose. His hard body, yeah I felt that when I carried him to my car. His eyebrows. I giggled at this thought. His hands....ooooohhhh yeeess..those hands..I felt a blush creep up my face. I smiled and laid down on my bed to watch some tv. Maybe when he woke up we could have some fun! ************************************************************************** Feb. 24, 1999 11:21 am FBI District Field Office in Bad Rock Scully frowned at the DNA report. The document stated that the hair fiber didn't belong to Mulder. It belonged to a young woman named Julie Brennen, who had a file available from a background check. She had worked as a secretary in DC's Headquarters almost 4 yrs ago. It was so easy to connect it all now. Obviously, she must have stalked Mulder at one point. Maybe that's why she kidnapped him. She worked there the time right before and during the period when Scully was abducted. She disappeared one day, never to return. The only thing else in the file was that she also had a criminal record since then. Robbery, larceny, trespassing on private property, and aiding and abetting in kidnapping several men in various cities for no seemingly reasonable answer. Why? "Agent Scully? I thought I told you to stay...." Skinner found her in one of the offices and interrupted her thoughts. "No sir, I can't stay out of this. No more than you can. He is my frie...I mean partner," Scully added while blushing a tad. Skinner just looked at her and gave a tiny understanding nod. He leaned over her shoulder to see the reports. "Well? What do you say about that?" "I don't know. At least there is no mention of murder. What is with this girl? Only 28 yrs old?? And to do the things she has done? And to think she used to work in the FBI..." "Only as a secretary, which means she had access to files..." "Lots and lots of files," Scully finished his thought. She glanced up at him and said tenderly, "We have her picture now. We can find her.....and Mulder..if it isn't too late..." Skinner nodded his agreement and glanced at his watch. "Time is ticking..let's do it!" ************************************************************************** Yummy. Delicious. I imagined him covered in chocolate and he wanted me to lick it off him. *Me*. My dreams swirled around as he yelled for me to take him. To touch him....to feel him...to let go into him...ooohh..yeeesss.. My eyes opened. I was dreaming. He was screaming. For help. Now fully awake, I turned my body to face him. He *was* yelling. Damn him!! I jump up and slap him! POW! hard! Three times!! "How dare you???? Someone could hear you, you idiot!!!" I was so mad!! Mad at him for yelling, mad at me for falling asleep on the job. What if someone heard?? Someone was knocking on the door. The housekeeper lady? I fumbled in my bag and found the tape. I ripped off a strip of duct tape and placed it over his mouth. *Now* he would shut up!! I covered the blanket over him and his arms and went to the door. "Buenos Dias Senorita! No hablo ingles..." a little old lady spoke to me. It was evident that she was the cleaning lady. I made motions with my hands that I had a very clean room. That it was no need for her to be there. She nodded and seemed to accept my answer. Then she went on to the next room. Whew! That was close, but she saw what I looked like. I was getting antsy now. What if someone recognized me? Naww, no one knew who I was. I turned back to my victim. After I pulled the covers back, I glared at him. "why did you yell? You want me to kill you??" Those eyes looked back at me. Damned eyes!! "Mmummmuuuummmmmmuumm," he mumbled. I peeled off his tape while saying, "If you scream again...I'm gonna kill you...." He just looked at me. He must have known how uncomfortable I was at looking at him. It was like staring right through me. Like he was trying to get in my head. "What?? Stop staring at me!!" I raised my hand to belt him another one. He winced. "You won't kill me. You don't have the guts..." I just looked at him. "You are just a tiny person who wants to be big. You drag me out to nowhere's ville, yelling at me, trying to give you information that I don't have. You try to kill me and my partner but you wimp out. You think I know things, but I don't. You need help. Serious help." His voice began to soothe my emotions again. Luring me into a sleepy trance. "I can help you. If you let me go, I promise I'll protect you. I won't let any harm come to you. You need me. Please let me help you...." He was so sweet to think of me. Awww... His eyes were pleading and begging me to agree with him. All he knew was the location, but that changed every so often. He really didn't know anything of use to him. It must have been luck to get where he was so far. My mind reeled with possibilities of letting him go. I think that maybe..I can. ************************************************************************* She's falling for it! Oh yeah.....I'm like..outta here in a few minutes!! Mulder tried to keep his soft gaze on this lady for a few more minutes. In a way, he thought maybe it was truth to what he was saying to her. Maybe she just worked for the wrong people and needs to get back on track. Well, maybe i *can* help her after all! He watched a tear fall from her eyes. She needs to be loved. She said she didn't have any parents, so maybe she is just confused. If she had someone to care for her.....what am I thinking??? Oh god! I can't sympathize with her?? That's wrong!! I'm trying to fool her..not me! She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. Aww...she's crying... Mulder closed his eyes and wondered what it was like to be her. He felt her hand on his chest. Her small movements made him feel close to her. She was rubbing his chest and his arms. Her long fingers gently caressing his neck and starting on his back. He felt her move on top of him and warning bells went off. He reopened his eyes to find her lifting his shirt and fondling his chest hairs. Noooo..he screamed to himself. Not that!! "No..you can't.." he whispered to her. He tried to stop her but he was handcuffed to the headboard. Her fingers glided down his chest and found his zipper on his pants. "NOO! Don't do this! This isn't right! This isn't what you want!!" The urgency in his voice sounded loud and clear, but it only seemed to make her move faster. She unzipped him and reached for his manliness. Instead of touching him right away, she moved back up at him. Her lips started tingling on his neck as a warm moistness devoured him. She seemed pleased to tease him and quietly moaned his name in his ear. He could feel her move her still-clothed body against his. Swirling thoughts clouded over his mind. She was letting him know that she wanted him. Really bad. End Part 3...Part 4 coming soon! jewlz@vnet.net FEED ME!! I Need To Know (4/4) by Jewlz! Author's notes: Thanks for the feedback I have received so far. I hope to get much more! Disclaimer and other stuff in part one. And without furthur ado...the conclusion.... *********************************************************************** Feb. 24, 1999 12:34 pm Hot Springs, North Carolina Cool Breeze Motel: Room 22 I gnawed on his neck a little. Yum! So tasty! I let my tongue tickle his ear and was pleased when he groaned with secret pleasure. I could always turn men on like a switch! I let my hands wander into nether regions and felt his muscles tighten up. He wants me! He really does! I looked down on him and saw how his face was turned to the side. Time for the holy grail... I put my lips on his ever so gently, letting his sweetness and his smell seep into me. I started to make circles with our lips and was ready to join our tongues when I heard it. "Scuuulllleee..." It was soft, yet I heard it just the same. He didn't want me!! He wanted her!!!!! I jerked up and off him. It was my turn to stare at him now. "What?? Isn't this what you wanted?? You want to rape me? Isn't that it?" Mulder accused me. I was unsure of what to say to him. "No," I stated simply. "I don't want to anymore. You don't care about me. You don't even know me." I started pacing the floor and waited for him to say more. He didn't. RRRiiiiinnnnngggggg.... I glanced at the phone. I knew who it was. It was BOSS. I saw Mulder's fear gathering in his eyes. I *knew* he was afraid. I picked up the phone. "Yes?" "Well, what did he tell you?" "How did you find me?" "I was watching the whole time." "So you know that Agent Mulder is still alive?" "Yes." "and you're not mad?" Silence. "Sir? Alex?" Alex answered and said, "No. You were doing the right thing." Whew! I wiped the sweat off my brow with a happy sigh. I was so worried he would find out, when he knew all along. I caught Mulder's eyes with mine and he seemed to relax a bit. "Well, sir, why are you calling?" "To know what Mulder knows." "Well.....ummm..." I was still playing hooky with Mulder's eyes. He would look up at me, I would look away, but I would catch him stealing glances and he caught me too. "Yes? I believe you have interrogated him?? What does he know?" I felt awful. I knew that if I told on Mulder, he would have to die. On the other hand, Boss would kill me if he uncovered the project and destroyed it all. I was simply torn in two. Mulder.....me....Mulder....me....Mulder.....me... It was the hardest thing in my life to say but I said it. "He doesn't know anything....the things he found out were false. He is still in the dark." There. I said it. I couldn't even look back at Mulder, knowing he would be relieved. I nearly choked when I told Boss goodbye. I hung the phone up. Boss wanted me to let him go. He was free. *************************************************************************** Feb. 25, 1999 7:11 pm Somewhere on Route 77 I risked a glance at him. He was sleeping peacefully in the back seat. We hadn't talked since the phone call, but I made sure he knew I was letting him go. He had so many questions in his eyes as I told him he would sleep for awhile before I took him to Scully. Yes, I had told him. Scully *was* alive. He looked as if he *could* kiss me. He was still bound and gagged in the backseat, my heart reaching out for him. Did we have a connection? He certainly seemed to follow what was going on. Now my heart was breaking, wondering if he would tell the others what i had told him. I had told him about the project. I had told of the experiments the government were conducting on innocent civilians. His eyes told me he already knew these things. He had nodded agreement with everything I told him. The location, the names associated with the project, and some names of victims that were abducted. Victims that were chosen a long time ago. Victims that had many tests and were solely for those purposes. It was all for the better of humanity. It was against the colonists who wanted to take over earth. It was against the rebels. It was a complex system in between the two opposing forces that threatened all humanity. And Mulder knew every bit of it. I noticed he was awake when I heard a muffled noise. I reached back and took off the tape from his mouth. He looked around and saw that we were stopped by the side of the road. "Where are we?" Mulder sighed as he sat up. "Somewhere. I was just going to say good-bye. I want you to know...I'm leaving the project." "What about your boss? Alex Krycek?" I nearly blanched on that one. How did he know??? How did he guess it was Krycek?? I coughed a little and replied, "You're something else, Special Agent Mulder. Is there anything you *don't* know??" I gave him a tight smile. Mulder slyly grinned. "I got in your head." Hehehe. Mulder looked around again and asked, "Where will you go? You can't run from them. They will find you and kill you. Krycek is a man who won't let anything..I mean anything...get in his way. If you came under police custody with your testimony, I'll make sure you're protected. You can help put these men away for good!" I was silent. I couldn't do it. I would be out in the open, too easy to find and kill. No, I would go my own way..lurk in the shadows... "Talk to meee!" he seemed adamant. This was the most talking we had done over the few couple of days we had met. "I can't! I've told you too much already. You..you can take the information with you and expose them! But, I can't! I just can't!" I turned to face the front of the car again. I picked up the cell phone I had carried with me in my bag. "What's her number?" "Who's number?" Mulder asked impatiently. "Hers. The red-head. Your partner." Mulder calmed down at the thought of Scully. I knew deep down they were 'connected'. It was the only thing running through his mind! He gave me the number and I dialed it carefully. "Scully." A voice stated, sounding very dismayed. "Ms. Scully? I have your partner." "What??? Where is he?? Let me speak to him!!" Her voice came alive at the mention of him. I turned around and put the phone up to his ear. "Scully?? I'm fine....please....don't say that.....I said I'm fine.........I said.... Scully?? I don't know.......she's letting me....she's letting me go....." I listened to his side of the conversation. She seemed to be very upset..and rightly so.. "Skinner?? I'm fine......yes.......no........yes.......no........" He winked at me and smiled for a bit. I was happy for him deep down. I really was.... When they hung up, after they had traced the call, he leaned back and closed his eyes. "Thank you," he muttered. "For what?? I almost killed you!" I gave him a mocking grin. "For not doing it. For stopping." I knew what he was talking about. He must want to save himself for her. "Yeah? well, Krycek and I had some good times, before he became my boss. I used to work with him ya know. At the Headquarters?? You know....when he was your partner?? I was a ..." "Secretary....you were the secretary at the time...I remember now," Mulder finished my thoughts. I heard sirens in the distance. They were coming to get him. I had to hurry. "I'm surprised at you! Alex always boasted of your terrific memory," We gaffawed in unison. I grabbed the door handle and my bag at the same time. "Well? it's been real..." Mulder took on a sad expression. I wanted to hug him goodbye but, they were closing in fast... Mulder blurted out, "Will I see you again??" He had popped his head out the side window. The cool night air ruffling in the breeze. I wondered to myself how much he would miss me. I *knew* I would miss him... I turned to leave him there, the side bushes and trees were calling my name...I would slink away unnoticed in the night... "I need to know...." I risked one more glance at the object of my obsession for the past few days. Red and blue flashed in the night. Hooboy..he loooked so good in the light!! He repeated his question. "I need to know....will you be ok? Will I see you again??" I gave him a quick kiss on the forehead. "Maybe....." I answered and dove out of sight just as the police cars drove up. From my little hiding space, I could see everything. Mulder was helped out of the car......Scully ran to him and helped him out of his bonds....then she hugged him like she would never let go.....another tall man with a bald head and glasses came up and patted Mulder on the back. All three seemed to blend together perfectly. I saw them question him about me. He denied I was there somewhere, saying I was long gone. But as he was helped into the car with Scully, I could have swore that he looked *right* at me. It was just for a second, but I could feel our 'connection'. It made me happy. It was all I needed to know.......... THE END FEED meee please!!!! I need feedback!!!!!! jewlz@vnet.net -- Jewlz! "I'm gonna take a wild stab here and guess this is a clue." --Mulder: Kitsunegari