Hope this works, it's my first time sending out a story...

This is my first X-Files Fanfic. I wrote it after reading a
challenge at a.t.x.c that had to do with the pictures of M & S
in TV Guide. On page 20 there is a shot of David Duchovny holding
Gillian Anderson while they are looking off in the distance and she
is wearing his jacket. It's a beautiful shot, and my favorite. When
I read the challenge I was suddenly struck with the idea for this story.

Summary:
Mulder decides to take Scully to a concert "as a friend".

Spoilers:
A slight allusion to "Hell Money" (very slight). And this takes
place before Quagmire. (I did name the dog Clyde at one point,
but I changed it after this episode.)

It's not an x-file and it does have relationship stuff. So Beware!!

Disclaimer:
The two songs used in this story are:
"Loving You" from the Steven Sondheim musical "Passion" &
"If I Loved You" from the Rodgers & Hammerstein musical "Carousel"
They are both on the latest Mandy Patinkin CD, and since Mandy
is busy touring right now, I came up with this idea.

This story is based on the characters and situations created by
Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen Productions, and Fox Broadcasting. Used
without permission (but lovingly) and no infringement is intended.
So please don't sue me, I can hardly afford the phone bill already!

This work is not to be forwarded or distributed to any newsgroup,
FTP, or WWW site without my name and e-mail addy on it!

I do give permission for it to be put on atxc.


If I Loved You...
by rumpltzr@mindspring.com (Kelli)
04/07/96

March 29th, 1996
7:45 PM

Fox Mulder was late.  He was aware of this fact and he was not happy
about it. It wasn't the fact he was late that made him nervous, it
was the fact that he was late picking up his partner... and she had a gun.

'She wouldn't shoot me,' he thought with a certain uneasiness. 'After all,
I got her the tickets in the first place.'

Still, he decided that a little excessive speeding would be required if
he wanted to escape Scully's wrath. Putting those thoughts from his mind,
he inched the speedometer up another 10 mph and prayed that she was still
in a good mood.

*****

7:50 PM

Fox Mulder was late. Scully briefly thought of pulling out her gun and
shooting him when he arrived, but that wouldn't help matters any. Pacing
the length of her bedroom, she went through the same ritual she had been
performing for the last twenty minutes... Hair? Fine. Ok, it was better
then *fine*, it was perfect. She wasn't certain if this style was
appropriate for an evening with her *partner*, but she so rarely got
to "play dress up."  Makeup? Flawless, for once. Though maybe the eye
were too overdone? No! They were perfect, she was just nervous.

Nervous? Where the hell did that come from?  Just because she was attending
a performance at the Kennedy Center and her favorite artist was performing
and she was going with Mulder...

'Ok... whoa... put a stop to that thought Dana!  After all it's *just* Mulder.'
she told herself as she gazed in the mirror.

All right, what's left?  Dress? Beautiful! It cost way too much on her meager
government salary, but the deep blue of the floor-length gown brought out
the matching blue in her eyes. And the color contrasted with her hair like
fire and ice. Maybe it was too much? "Stop it Dana!" she told herself out
loud. "You are so critical."

As she took a deep breath and decided to check her hair again, she
heard a knock at her apartment door. "Thank God! He's here."

Queequag, the puffy pomeranian that shared her residence, went into a frenzy.
It had to be Mulder, only his presence could send that dog into such an
extreme orbit. Pushing the yapping dog into her bedroom and shutting
it in, Dana stepped quickly to the front door and prepared to open it.

"Mulder?"

"Scully? Don't shoot, I know I'm late."

Dana laughed at the all too accurate comment and opened the door to allow
Mulder's entrance. She thought briefly to herself, 'He looks like he came
from the office.' and realized that the thought was accurate. He was still
wearing the suit he had arrived at work in earlier that morning. He had
managed to find time to shave at some point, and considering the lingering
speck of shaving cream at the bottom of his left ear, it must have been
very recently.

"I thought this was a black-tie affair Mulder?" Dana asked with just a
touch of exasperation in her voice.

"I got caught at the bureau, Agent Scarpelli wanted my opinion on a case
that's been dragging through V.C. and I lost track... of the... time..."
Mulder's eyes had been pointed at the floor during the first part of his
prepared speech, but as he looked up to meet her gaze, his voice faltered,
then quit altogether.

'My God! She's beautiful.' Her hair was piled on top of her head in a sexy
mess, and her makeup only emphasized her smoldering blue eyes and perfect
red mouth. And that dress! It must have cost her two weeks... no, a month's
salary! But Mulder would gladly reimburse her for every penny, if she would
agree to wear that to the office once in awhile, instead of her conventional
suits. He realized that Scully was waiting for him to continue so he attempted
to cover his surprise by switching tactics.

"Anyway, I'm here, we're going to be late, let's go." With that said, he
grabbed Scully's arm and hustled her out the door.

"Mulder, my coat!" She was too surprised by his abrupt statement to put up much
of an argument, and soon found herself being led out of the building to his
waiting car.

"Don't worry it's not that cold out." Mulder answered as he ushered her down
the front stairs.

*****

8:00 PM

The drive to the Kennedy Center took less time then they had thought, and
they just managed to arrive before the 8:00 o'clock performance began.

'I can't believe he got tickets to this.' Dana mused as she took her
seat next to her partner.

If she had known what Mulder was thinking when he got these tickets, she
might not have been so surprised.

*****

March 14, 1996
2:16 PM

"Frohike, I need a favor." Mulder was trying to speak as low as possible.
It wouldn't do any good if Scully came in and overheard him.

"Sure thing, mi muchacho. What can we do for you today?" Frohike's voice was
full of merriment as he imagined what Mulder could be asking them to do.
Information on an alien abduction? Top-secret plans to a military installation?
Pictures of the lovely Agent Scully while she slept? Frohike would obtain
those personally if necessary!

"I need tickets to the Mandy Patinkin performance at the Kennedy Center."

"What?! This is a joke right?"

Mulder sighed, he knew to expect this, but it didn't make it easier. "No,
I'm not. I need them... for a friend... hell I owe them to a friend, and
everyone else in town is sold out."

"Sooo, the beautiful Agent Scully is a fan of Patinkin... well, I'll have
to file that for future use." Frohike was practically beaming.

"I never said it was Scully,"

"You didn't need to, besides us, what other friends do you have?" Mulder
couldn't deny that. "Ok, Kennedy Center huh? That's going to be a tough one.
Give me a couple of days and I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks Frohike, say hello to the boys for me."

"Sure thing Mulder. Oh and one other thing."

"Yes?"

"I want pictures, lots and lots of pictures."

"You're a sick man Frohike."

Frohike couldn't deny that.

*****

March 29
8:30 PM

"Ladies and Gentleman the Kennedy Center is Proud to present... MANDY PATINKIN!"

The applause was deafening and Mulder allowed Scully's sudden attention
towards the stage to give him the excuse he needed to look at her. 'Look
at her. Jesus, I can hardly keep my eyes off her!'

Since they had left her apartment, Mulder had tried to avoid staring openly
at her like a junior-high boy with a crush on a senior-high cheerleader.
He concentrated on getting them to the center in one piece, before the
performance. Scully's questions about the Violent Crimes case were answered
automatically, as if someone else were speaking for him. If she noticed his
odd behavior, she didn't mention it. Still when he had asked her to go, she
had been so surprised...

*****

March 26
3:45 pm

"Scully?"

"Hmm?" Dana answered, as she continued to work on her report. This last case
had been a tough one, the man in charge of "The Game" had reminded her too
much of another shady character that she and Mulder had crossed on occasion.
Right now all she wanted was to go home, soak in a hot tub and listen to her
latest CD.

"Do you have plans for Friday evening?" Mulder had approached Scully's desk
in the basement office and was hovering there, waiting for her answer.

"Friday night? Why? Do we have another case?" She groaned inwardly, not
another x-file. She had wanted to relax this weekend, maybe do some reading.
Queequag could certainly use a bath.

"No, it's not a case, I just... " Mulder stopped, unsure of how to continue.

"Yes?"

"A friend of mine... he got these tickets, but he can't use them..." Again
Mulder faltered.

"And?"

"He gave them to me, and I was wondering if you would like to go."

'Great, tickets. Probably to a basketball game.' Scully thought. 'Well,
it's better then bathing the dog.'

"Sure Mulder, who's playing?" she said.

Mulder let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding, "Oh, some
guy name Patinkin. I think he used to be on that doctor show."

"Patinkin? Mandy Patinkin!? Mulder I adore him! I've been trying to get
tickets for months, but everyone was sold out. And the scalpers are asking
outrageous prices! What did your friend have to do to get these tickets?
Sleep with the President?"

Mulder just chuckled, "I don't think he would enjoy that, he's definitely not
a Democrat!" Whatever Frohike had done to get the tickets, it was worth the
cost. The look on Scully's face was exactly what he had been wanting to see
when he sprang this on her.

True... things between them had been stressed lately. Working day in and day
out with someone, relying on that person in times of need would do that to you.
But it looked like finally their relationship was getting back on track. The
old Scully was coming back, and the old Mulder was meeting her half-way. He
just hoped that he wasn't pushing things too much by getting those tickets.

Mulder lowered his voice to a sensual level and leaning across her desk teased
her with his eyes, "So does this mean you'll go?"

Scully's grin was equally enthusiastic. "Try and stop me."

*****

March 29
9:45 PM

As the last strains from "Bali Hai" spread across the audience, Mulder shifted
in his seat. He was more of a rock-n-roll kind of guy, but this wasn't too bad.
It was actually kind of nice. The guy did have a fantastic voice, and Scully
was breathless, hanging on every word that he sang.

The next song up was a slow ballad from another musical, he wasn't sure of the
title but it was Loving... something. Maybe he could catch the title in the
song...

   Loving you is not a choice;
   it's who I am.
   Loving you is not a choice;
   and not much reason to rejoice.
   But it gives me purpose, gives me voice
   to say to the world;
   this is why I live
   You are why I live.

   Loving you is why I do the things I do.
   Loving you is not in my control.
   But loving you, I have a goal
   for what's left of my life.
   I will live, and I would die for you.

'Loving You, that's the title. Something inside of Mulder shifted as he listened
to the words. They spoke more then he could ever express. Then he *would*
ever express.

The song kept it's slow, soft rythym and segued into the next selection. Mulder
knew this one, he had seen the movie on the AMC channel several weeks ago, and
this song had brought to him then, the same emotions it was bringing to him now.

   Oh, you can't hear a sound
   not the turn of a leaf,
   nor the fall of the wave hittin' the sand.
   The tide's creepin' up
   on the beach like a thief,
   afraid to be caught stealin' the land.

   There's a helluva lot of stars in the sky.
   The sky's so big, the sea looks small.
   And two little people,
   you and I,
   we don't count at all.

   If I loved you,
   time and again I would try to say
   all I'd want you to know.
   If I loved you,
   words wouldn't come in an easy way;
   'round in circles I'd go!

Mulder heard Scully's sharp intake of breath and glanced at her. He was
slightly
shocked at what he saw... one lone tear, sliding slowly down her cheek.

   Longing to tell you, but afraid and shy,
   I'd let my golden chances pass me by.
   Soon you'd leave me;
   off you would go in the mist of day,
   never, never to know
   how I loved you,
   if I loved you.

Mulder started to lift his hand to wipe the tear from her face when he felt
Scully slide her hand in his. The music swelled as the last refrain was
repeated...

   Longing to tell you, but afraid and shy,
   I'd let my golden chances pass me by!
   Soon you'd leave me;
   off you would go in the mist of the day,
   never, never to know
   how I loved you,
   if I love you.

Applause swept over the crowd as Mulder stared at the hand he held in his. Dana
made no move to remove her hand, and Mulder didn't want her to. For the rest
of the performance they remained with fingers entwined, listening to the
beautiful
music that spoke volumes about how they felt.

*****

12:10 AM

After the performance, Mulder was reluctant to drive Scully home. It was late,
four curtain calls and five standing ovations had extended the performance
until well after 11:00 pm.

Scully was silent as he led her to his car and held her door open. Mulder
wasn't sure what she was thinking, and wasn't sure if he wanted to know.
Just as he was about to start the car, he felt Scully's hand on his arm.

"Mulder."

"Yeah, Scully?" Mulder answered, trying to keep his tone light.

"I don't..." She hesitated. "I don't want to go home."

Mulder's mind raced, 'Where did she want to go? Where was there to go at
this hour?'

"Could we go get some coffee?"

'Coffee, I can manage coffee.' Mulder thought quickly.

"Sure Scully, coffee I can do." he said has started driving.

Her smile didn't escape him, "I'm sure there are lot's of things you can do
Mulder. But coffee would be a good start."

Mulder nearly lost control of the car, 'What the hell did that mean?'

*****

12:35 AM

After driving silently for thirty minutes, they found an all-night diner that
specialized in "Pies, Pies and MORE PIES!!"

Scully laughed at the inventive sign that graced the entrance.

"I guess their specialty is pies." Mulder replied when he saw what caught her
attention. Holding open the door for her, she entered the greasy diner and
located a table towards the back of the room. Mulder followed, sliding into
the booth opposite her.

A surprisingly bubbly waitress bounced over to take their order. "Evenin'
folks,
my that is a beautiful dress honey! Did ya'll go to a dance or somethin'?"

"Something like that," Scully replied glancing a Mulder with a smile.

"Well you two are prettier then a picture. What can I get for ya'?"

"Coffee will be fine," Mulder said quickly, he was a little flustered at
being called "pretty".

"Sure thing. Be right back."

Scully just grinned at Mulder. "You do look 'pretty' Mulder."

"Oh, thanks Scully, I definitely feel 'pretty'." His look was one of extreme
discomfort.

"It's ok, I won't tell anyone at the Bureau, " at this, Mulder had to laugh.
"Spooky" Mulder had been called a lot of things at the bureau, but 'pretty' was
not one of them.

Dana continued before Mulder could reply, "Thank you Mulder."

"For what?" he asked, though he was sure he knew.

"For the tickets, for tonight," Scully's voice dropped to a whisper. "For
everything."

"Everything? That's a lot Scully."

"But it's true, I... I couldn't have made it through the last couple of years
without your help."

Mulder knew how hard this was for Scully, she was a strong person who only
wanted
to rely on herself. She wasn't used to relying on others.

"Scully, you wouldn't have been through the things you went through if it
weren't for..."

"Mulder, don't." Dana cut him short. "Don't blame yourself. I made a choice to
join the FBI, and I made a choice to stay with the x-files. I don't... I've
never regretted that decision."

"Never?" Mulder reached across the table and captured her hand in his.
"Never Scully?"

Dana looked her partner in the eye and smiled, "Never Mulder. I've never
regretted
my decision to work... to stay... with you."

*****

5:25 AM

After several cups of coffee were served and consumed, both Mulder and
Scully were
hardly in the mood to sleep. Instead, Mulder drove around for hours showing
various
sights to Scully that she already knew, but pretended that she didn't so he
would
continue. Before long they could see the sky getting lighter and they
realized that
dawn was upon them.

Mulder parked the car near Dana's building and walked around to open her
door. She
was allowing him this one time to play the 'manly' man, while she smiled and
played
the 'demure' lady. He almost laughed out loud at the thought.

He had long ago given up his jacket as the morning had become cooler, and it
swallowed her tiny frame. Walking slowly up to her building, Mulder stopped her
before she had a chance to go any further.

Without saying a word, he slowly pulled her into his arms and rested his
head on
top of hers. He wanted to stay like this forever. But he would settle for
just a
few minutes more. After they parted, things would be back to 'normal'. The
x-files
would consume most of their time, and his search for the truth would
continue. But at
least now he was positive that he would never have to search alone. And
perhaps one day...

As they both looked at the sun that was rising in the east, Mulder realized he
had given up much more then his just his jacket that evening.

*****

Thanks for reading. Comments are welcome. Flames will be ignored.
Please keep in mind that I don't normally write fiction and this is my *first*!!

rumpltzr@mindspring.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Agent Dennis/Denise Bryson]: Coop... I may be
wearing a dress, but I still pull my panties on
one leg at a time... if you know what I mean.

[Special Agent Dale Cooper]: Not really.

David Duchovny - Twin Peaks
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~