From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org
Date: 6 May 2002 18:18:44 -0000
Subject: Impossible Dreams by Agent Spooky
Source: direct

Reply To: msmessina@yahoo.com.br


Title: Impossible Dreams

Author: Agent Spooky

e-mail: msmessina@yahoo.com.br

Category: MSR

Rating: PG

Spoiler: William

Summary: Mulder thinks about Scully's decision.

Feedback: I hear is one of the things that feeds
best :)

Disclaimer: Not mine blah blah blah they belong to CC
and 1013 yadda yadda yadda


Impossible Dreams
by Agent Spooky


I just talked to Skinner. It's been half an hour since
we hung up. Half an hour since he said Scully gave William
for adoption. And I'm still staring at the phone. I feel
too numb to do anything else. 

He told me the reasons why she did it.
I understood every one of them. He just wasn't safe
with her. With us. And he never would be. I know she
loves our little boy very much. I know the family
that adopted him will give Will everything he needs
and more, for I know Scully wouldn't give her -our-
child to some people that didn't deserve him.

But I can't help feeling like someone is squeezing my
heart. I can't help but see all of the dreams I had for
us being shattered. So simple dreams. Coming home from work
and have him running to my arms and telling me all
about his day in childish excitement. Reading bedtime stories.
Teaching him how to play baseball. Taking him to a Yankees 
game. Teaching him how to shave. Giving him date advices.
So simple dreams. Now made impossible. I can't help the tears
that fall from behind closed lids. I think about the tiny cap
I bought for him. A Yankees cap that will never be worn.

I think about Scully and the pain she must be going through.
I wish I was there for her. I wish I could take her in my
arms and tell her that she did the right thing. That even
though it hurts like hell right now, she did the right 
thing. I wouldn't tell her that the pain would go away
as the time passes. For time can heal most wounds. But
not that of loosing a child. But I'd tell her it would
get better.

But I can't do any of these things right now. The only
thing that I can do is to never let go of my impossible
dreams.