From: miranda119@juno.com
Date: Tue, 7 Jan 2003 02:55:43 GMT
Subject: Lost and Found    by Miranda
Source: direct

Title:  Lost and Found
Author:  Miranda
Category:  SR, possible second movie scenario
Rating:  G
Summary:  My take on where Mulder and Scully might be when (and if)
the next movie comes out. 
Disclaimer:  They are Chris Carter's characters, and he's welcome to
my ideas if he hasn't thought of any of his own and that's why we have
no movie.


It is a horribly dismal night.  Freezing rain and howling wind.  I
hate being out in this.  The weather makes me long for my nice warm
apartment with a favorite old book and a cup of something hot and
soothing.  But Dicken's "Christmas Carol" and chamomile in Grandma's
antique rosebud teacup will have to wait tonight.  I'm on a mission. 

John gave me the call an hour ago.  He just got a call from Skinner,
who gave him some startling news.  John informed me that there's a
little boy sleeping in DC children's services tonight.  He's got brown
hair and bright blue eyes and a wide, trusting smile.  His little
three-year-old heart doesn't understand what's going on this Christmas
Eve, all he knows is that everything's changing.  He is quiet and
pensive.  But friendly.  Such a friendly child.  They let me say hi to
him over the phone.  He said hi back.  I told him I would find his
parents.  He didn't answer.  But I think he was smiling.

I'm knocking on a door.  It's a door I have never knocked on before. 
I double check the address on the crumpled and smeared piece of paper
in my palm.  It's the right place.  A dingy dilapidated old trailer
home.  There is no response to my first knock, so I knock again. 
Insistently.  The kind of knock that lets a person know there is
important news.

Finally, a face appears at the window, and then a series of unlocking
noises occur.  The door eventually opens a crack.

"What do you want, Monica?"  The voice is tired.  Defeated.  I can't
see him for the shadows but I know that he is not what he was once.

"I have some news for you.  Can I come in?"  I take a step toward the
door.  He chuckles humorlessly.  

"I wouldn't suggest it.  Why don't you just tell me."

"All right.  It's about your son.  He's been found."
	
There is a long silence in the doorway.  I hear him breathing. 
Finally he responds.

"Where are his parents?"  He asks through narrowed eyes.

"Dead.  They've been dead for a year already.  He's been passed around
until someone finally noticed him.  He's in DC.  And they want to talk
to you and Dana."

"I don't know the first thing about being a father, Monica."  His
voice is troubled and hesitant, but I imagine I can hear the first
twinge of hope I have heard the entire conversation.

"Well, you're not alone.  Where's Dana?"  My eyes strain to see past
him into the dark trailer.  The silence is deafening.  When he speaks,
it is with a broken voice.

"I don't know." 

"What do you mean, you don't know?"  I respond quickly in surprise. 
He sighs.

"I don't know.  I haven't seen her in over a year.  She left."

It takes me a moment to process his statement.  I guess my overly
optimistic view of life had assumed that they would be living in love
somewhere together, blissfully replacing all the years of turmoil with
happiness and life.  I guess my shock registers on my face, because I
see his look of shame.

"Mulder, why?"  I ask, not even stopping to think that it is none of
my business.  His pause is insufferably long.

"Monica, you don't realize what I do to people."  He finally meets my
gaze and says in a mournful tone.

"I realize that I have never seen such devotion and such love like the
kind that Dana Scully had on reserve for you, Mulder!  What in the
world could have happened to change that?"  

"Reality."  He murmurs bitterly.  I sigh.

"Well, your son needs you." I remind him impatiently.

"I can't, Monica."  He shakes his head stubbornly, wrapping his arms
across his old sweater.  I notice as well that his hair is scraggly
and his beard has been growing for a few days.  This man is a mess
without her.  What could they have been thinking to part like this?  

"You have to, he's your son!"  I reply hotly.  He shakes his head
again.

"I don't want him to see me like this."  He tries to make excuses.  

"He's three, Mulder.  He's not going to care what you look like."  I
retort.

"Monica, I don't want to see him.  I don't want to look in his eyes
and see her..." His words break off, and he fights the emotions that
are threatening his composure.  

I am out of patience.  I take two steps toward him, and stick my
finger in his face.

"Fox Mulder, you will go in that house and take a shower and shave and
put on some fresh clothes.  Then you will get your rear end out here
in the car and we will go retrieve your son from the very dangerous
and vulnerable position he is in at the moment.  Got it?"  

My words seem to knock some sense into his brain.  He slowly nods and
then closes the door.  I return to the car to wait.  Fifteen minutes
later he joins me, his appearance much improved, but the empty, hollow
look in his eyes still evident, perhaps even more obvious now.  

I turn the ignition and begin to drive back to the city.  We ride in
silence for a long time.  He seems to be in another world.  He stares
off into the distance as if he is a million miles away.

"Mulder, what happened?"  I ask again eventually, unable to bear my
itching curiosity any longer.

"Monica, you are the nosiest person I have ever met."  He says
humorlessly.  I smile.

"I know, it's my greatest fault."  I admit freely.  "So what made her
leave?"

"I did."  

I steal a glance at him and return my eyes to the road.  "Why would
you do that?"

"Because I didn't want her to have to go through what she'd been going
through for ten years before that.  I didn't want her to hurt anymore
because of me.  I didn't want to watch her lose anything else.  Most
of all her life."

"And she agreed with you?"  I question doubtfully.  He sighs, staring
straight ahead.

"I didn't tell her the truth."  

"What did you tell her?"  I press him.  

"I told her that I wasn't ready to make the kind of commitment to her
that she deserved."

"Oh, brother!"  I interject with disgust.  He shrugs.

"She fell for it.  She left the next morning and I haven't seen or
heard from her since."

"Do you miss her?"  I ask the question, more to increase his misery
level than to receive an answer.  I do not expect him to answer, but
he does.

"Yes."   

* * * * * * * *

The rest of the trip remained pretty much silent until we reached
children's services in D.C.  I remembered that I didn't know what name
he was going by.

"What name are you using now?"  I asked him as we got out of the car
and went to the door.  His features were still unreadable, vacant.

"Fox Mulder."  He said simply, not looking at me.

"But isn't that dangerous?  Don't they believe you're dead?"  I was
surprised by his answer.

"What does it matter anymore, Monica?  I think they've pretty much
figured out I'm not a threat anymore.  I haven't seen any sign of them
since that day."

I shook my head as I opened the door and went inside.  A cheery
secretary asked if she could help us.  I was about to speak for him,
but Mulder surprised me by answering  her.

"I'm Fox Mulder, I'm here to pick up my son."

The secretary nodded and reached for a file folder behind her.  "Yes,
I spoke with Walter Skinner this morning about you.  Now you do
understand that we will need to do a paternity test to make sure that
William is your son."

For a moment he looked worried, then he simply nodded.  "Sure."  

As the woman left the room, I turned to him.  "Are you at all worried
about how the test will turn out?"  He shrugged.

"Monica, I'm about 99% sure that William is Scully's and my son.  No,
I'm not worried about it.  What will be will be."

I shook my head at his flippant attitude as a nurse walked into the
room.  "Mr. Mulder, please come with me."  

Although Mulder would not be allowed to leave with his son until the
results came back the next day, they brought William in with me so
that Mulder could see him when he was done.  I smiled at the cheerful
little boy.  There really was no doubt who he belonged to.  He had a
great mass of dark hair and a rather large nose for his face.  His
eyes were unmistakably Scully's.  They were large and shiny and the
purest shade of blue.

"Hi, William."  I spoke in a friendly voice to him.  He smiled
immediately, and came and sat next to me.   I put my arm around him.

"William, do you know what's going on?"  I asked him curiously.  He
smiled at me again.

"See Dadda."  He explained to me, almost as if I was the child and he
were the adult.  "See Dadda today."

"Yes."  I agreed, amazed at his comprehension.  "You're going to meet
your daddy today."

It was not long before Mulder came into the room, somewhat hesitantly.
 As soon as William caught sight of him, his face lit up.  

"Dadda!"  He stood up and beamed.  Mulder looked at me with wonder in
his eyes.  He kneeled to be on the same level as the three year old.

"William, do you know who I am?"  

The child nodded, and reached out his childish arms to hug his father
around the neck.

"You're my Dadda."

I watched with my own eyes as the life began to flow in Mulder's face
again.  Tears filled his eyes as he put his arms around his little
boy.  Suddenly, Fox Mulder had a reason to live again.

"I'm so glad to see you, William.  So glad."  He whispered into the
child's soft hair.  He looked up at me.  

"He looks so much like her."  

I nodded, smiling through my own tears.  He stood, picking William up
as he did.

"I have to find Scully."  He told me with renewed determination.  "She
needs to be with William."

"And you need to be with Scully." I added.

"Scuwy?"  William repeated, looking at his father.  Mulder looked back
at him.

"Your mommy. We need to find your mommy."

"Mommy go bye-bye."  He said sadly, for the first time his little
smile fading.  "Mommy and Papa go bye-bye to God."

The grief of a three year old was enough to send the tears spilling
down my face.  Mulder took a deep breath, unused to explaining such
weighty issues to a child.

"Yes, you're right.  Your mommy and Papa did go to Heaven.  But you
are going to be with us now.  Your new mother and father."

William looked at me, as if trying to ascertain whether I were this
new replacement mother.  I shook my head.

"No, William, not me. Someone else."  

Mulder set little William down and pulled out his wallet.  Buried deep
in papers and bills was an old and crumpled picture of Scully, smiling
demurely in her softspoken way.  He showed the picture to the boy.

"This is your mother, William. You and I have to find her."

"Find Pretty Mama."  He agreed wholeheartedly, taking the picture in
his still awkward fingers and giving the photograph of Scully a
welcoming kiss.  His little eyes sparkled, almost as if he recognized
the mother who had given him birth and loved him so completely for
every day he'd been alive.

* * * * * * * * 

*I can't believe I'm a father.  I can't believe it.*

*I never would have guessed that my life would suddenly have become so
meaningful after so much heartache.*

The thoughts of Fox Mulder rested on his three year old the entire
night he spent in the hotel across the street.  He was up at dawn,
pacing the floor and willing the time away until it was 8:30 and he
could return to the children's services building.  Finally the time
arrived.  He took a deep breath and headed down the stairs and out
into the street.  The sun was shining brightly.  More brightly than
he'd remembered it shining in over a year.  He drew strength from its
encouraging rays and was confident as he opened the door and went to
the desk.  The secretary was just taking off her jacket.

"Good morning, Mr. Mulder.  I expected you to be here early."  She
smiled, looking around for the file folder.  As she picked it up and
opened it, she frowned.

"What is it?"  Mulder asked breathlessly.  She shook her head.

"It looks like there was a problem...."  She spoke in a distracted
tone as she read.  Mulder's heart began to beat very fast.  He felt
his throat constricting and his skin went very cold.

"What?"  He managed to squeak.  She twisted her mouth in thought and
asked for his driver's license.  She compared the license to the
paperwork.

"Okay, no problem.  Just a mix-up with your social security number. 
Your test came back fine.  I'll have them bring William and his things
right out for you."

Ten minutes later a little boy was running from the hallway.  Running
into his arms.  He had been a father for over three years.  But not
until this moment had he ever really been a daddy.  Suddenly visions
came rushing through his mind.  He would not make one mistake with
this child.  He would raise him to be the best man possible.  There
would be no secrets or conspiracies or hurtful words or broken
promises.  William would grow up with the security and the power that
love brings.  

"Where we go, Dadda?"  William took his hand and grabbed his oversized
teddy bear with the other.  Mulder picked up his little suitcase and
smiled at him.

"We gotta go find your Mama."

* * * * * * * * 

That night Mulder and William walked up the steps of a familiar home. 
 William paused at the door and looked up at his father.

"This where Mama lives, Dadda?"  He asked hopefully.  Mulder shook his
head.

"No, Will.  This is where Grandma lives.  Grandma used to take care of
you all the time when you were just a little baby."

"I like Grandma."  Will's eyes shone as he tried to express his heart
with a three year old's vocabulary.

"She likes you too.  She will be so happy to see you."

The door opened a few moments after he rang the doorbell.  Margaret
Scully's eyes grew large as she recognized him.

"Fox!  Fox, come in!  It's been so long since I've seen you."  She
enveloped him in a big hug.  Then she noticed the little boy standing
next to him.  She looked at Mulder in hopeful surprise.

"Is it..."  Her voice trailed off as she gazed at the child with the
enormous grin on his face.

"Hi, Grandma.  I like you. My name is Will-em."  

She burst into joyful tears as she kneeled and pulled the boy into her
arms and hugged him.  Mulder gave her a lopsided grin.

"Can we come in?"  He asked sheepishly.  She laughed and pulled them
both inside.  

"I'll go get some cookies and milk.  Does that sound good, William?" 
She kissed his cheek and ran to the kitchen.  

"Oh, Grandma, I just love cookies!"  He cried in delight.

Fifteen minutes later as William busily worked his way through a giant
chocolate chip cookie, Mulder took a deep breath.

"Mrs. Scully, please tell me that you know where Dana is."  His voice
was pleading.  She looked at him for a long moment.

"Fox, you know that she is hurting right now?  You just about
destroyed her when you sent her away.  I've never seen her so
miserable as she has been this past year."  Her tone held
admonishment, and Mulder nodded meekly.

"I was wrong.  I've been miserable as well.  It's just that I need her
back.  And William needs to be with her."  

There was a long silence following his emotional statement.

"Fox, she's moved on with her life.  I think she even has a new friend
she's been seeing.  A man.  I agree that William belongs with her. 
But I don't know if she has room for you in her life anymore.  You are
going to have to let her take the time and make that decision for
herself."

Her motherly tone was gentle, but firm.  "I won't let you do any more
harm to my daughter, Fox."

He nodded.  "I know.  I'm so sorry."  He whispered.  "I caused her so
much while we were working together.  She gave up so much for me."

"That's not what I'm talking about, Fox.  I'm talking about when you
made her leave."

His eyes met hers.  Slowly he nodded.  "I was trying to protect her."
He softly pleaded with her to understand.  "But I just can't function
without her."

She said no more, but took the pad of paper and the pencil by the
phone.  She wrote down a number, and handed it to him.

"William and I are going to go in the other room and look at some of
his baby pictures while you make your phone call."

Mulder was left alone with the phone and the number.  He took a deep
breath, trying to imagine what he could possibly say to her.  He
dialed the number, thinking of the irony.  How many times had he
called her over the ten years they were together, and now he could
hardly press the buttons. 

After three excruciatingly long rings, she answered.

"Scully."  Her heard the familiar greeting.  He couldn't speak for a
long moment.

"Hello?"  

"Scully, it's me."  He finally spoke.  Now it was her turn for
silence.

"Mulder."

"Scully, I know at this point that you are moving on with your life. 
I don't mean to interrupt your plans or....."

"What do you want, Mulder?" He heard the edge in her voice.  

"I have someone here.  Someone who would like very much to see you
again."  Mulder sighed.  He could almost see her face tense, her mouth
pressed together tightly in anger.

"No, Mulder.  I won't let you do this to me again.  You said you
wanted me out of your life and now I don't need you anymore.  I will
not let you do this to me."  Her words cut him just like a razor.  He
cringed.

"Scully, I understand that you are angry at me.  But this has nothing
to do with you and I.  Well, it does, but not in the way you are
thinking.  I'm at your mother's house, and so is the other person I
mentioned.  I don't want to tell you over the phone.  Please come."

"Mulder, who is it?"  She asked in a tired voice.  

"Not over the phone."  He hated to do it, but he hung up the phone
quickly.  She would be curious.  She would have to come and see who it
was, just with the remote chance that it was William.

* * * * * * * *

His suspicions proved correct.  At 2:30 in the morning, he heard a car
pull up in the driveway.  Mrs. Scully and William had long since gone
to bed, and were sleeping soundly.  Mulder had been dozing on the
couch.  He ran to the window, and saw the familiar head of red hair in
the front seat.  She didn't come to the door right away.  He stayed
where he was by the window, watching her, willing her to come.  About
ten minutes later, she finally opened the door and walked slowly up
the path to the porch stairs.

He gulped as he heard the sound of the key in the lock.  Seconds
later, he was staring into her beautiful blue eyes for the first time
in what seemed like an eternity.

Neither spoke for a long moment.  Eventually she looked away.

"Mulder."  She greeted coldly.
 
"Hi, Scully."

"So where is this mystery person that couldn't wait to see me?"  She
asked disparagingly.

"He's sleeping right now."  Mulder smiled.  Scully's eyes narrowed.

"Mulder, if you called me over here to try and talk me into some crazy
scheme of yours I will take out my gun and shoot you."  

It was hard to ascertain whether she was exaggerating or not.

"I'm sorry, Scully, it's just that he had a busy day and I would hate
to wake him at this late hour.  You can see him in the morning.  Your
mom made a bed for you in the spare room."

Scully stared at him suspiciously.  Then without a word she picked up
her bag and icily walked past him to the back hallway where the spare
room was.  What he didn't know is that the minute she closed the door
behind her she burst into tears.

* * * * * * 

William turned out to be very much a chip off the old block, in that
he didn't require much sleep.  When Mulder opened his eyes around six
in the morning, William was leaning on the couch next to him, watching
him intently.

"Dadda woked up."  He smiled.  Mulder smiled and grabbed him, pulling
him up on the couch with him.

"Will 'woked' up as well I guess."

"Dadda?"  Will patted his hand.  

"What is it, son?"  

"Will-em very hungry."

"Of course you are - you're my son!"  Mulder laughed and swung him up
in his arms and went to the kitchen.  "What do you want me to make
you?"  

"I want scambled edds."  William tried to form the words of his
favorite breakfast.  Mulder scrunched up his nose.

"I was afraid you'd say that.  Daddy doesn't know how to make
'scambled edds'."

"Mama know?"  He asked innocently.  Mulder chuckled.  

"Yes, Will.  Mama knows how."

"I saw the Pretty Mama."

"Where did you see her?"  Mulder questioned as he put a couple of
pieces of bread in the toaster.

"In that room."  He pointed.  "I woked up and watched her sleeping."

Mulder nodded and went to the fridge for some butter and OJ.  Suddenly
a voice from behind him startled him.

"Mulder?"  Scully was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, staring
at the little boy as if she'd seen a ghost.

"Hi, Mama!"  William called cheerfully.  Mulder smiled.

"Scully, I believe you've met William."

For a moment she couldn't move, then she descended upon the child with
unintelligible sobs.  He wrapped his arms around her neck and squeezed
with all the power his little arms could muster.

"Pretty Mama."  He nodded at Mulder.  "Pretty Mama woked up."

"Oh, William!"  She was still crying when she let him go to look at
him.  "You're such a big boy.  You were so little when I saw you
last."

"I growed up Mama."   He explained matter-of-factedly.  "Mama make
Will-em some scambled edds?  Dadda not know how to make scambled
edds."

"Yes, baby,"  she laughed through her tears.  "Mama will make you some
eggs!"

Mulder sighed with relief to see Scully's smile.  He was glad that he
could at least finally bring her some kind of happiness.  They enjoyed
breakfast with the little boy and then he announced that he would be
right back as he needed to use the bathroom.

"Will-em go baf-room."  He called as he ran down the hall.  Mulder and
Scully turned to one another.

"Mulder, where did you find him? And where are his parents?"  She
looked at him desperately.

"They're dead, Scully."  He answered her.  "Died a year ago."

"Did *they* kill them?"  She referred to the anonymous people they
might expect to do so.  He shook his head.

"They died in a car crash.  No family.  He was sent here and there and
everywhere until he finally ended up back here in DC in the hopes that
his real parents might come to claim him.  Monica came and got me."

"How did they know you were his father?"  She asked pointedly.  Mulder
gazed at her for a moment, almost breathless at the sight of her
beautiful features.

"Scully, you look so beautiful."  He breathed.  "Have I ever told you
that?"  

"Not that I can remember." She crossed her arms in front of her, not
to be easily taken in.   "Mulder, answer the question."

"How did they know I was his father?  Scully, do you have any
doubts?"

"Yes."  She answered simply, raising her eyebrows in warning.

"They did a paternity test.  William is my son."

She visibly relaxed.  "Then he's normal?  He's human?"  She looked as
if she might faint.  His arm instinctively went to her waist.  She did
not jerk away, but allowed him to support her.

"He's human.  But I wouldn't say normal.  After all, he is MY son."

She shot him a look.  He smiled in return.

"He's remarkable."

"So what now?"  She spoke after a moment.  He gave her a tentative
look.

"Your mother said that you'd...moved on.  That you were seeing
someone."

"I told my mother that to alleviate her fears and get her off my
back."  She admitted.

"There's no one?"  He asked hopefully.  Her eyes traveled to the
ceiling.

"Mulder, there's never been anyone but you."

In two seconds he had her in his arms, and his lips on hers.  She
tasted so good after so much time away from her.  He made a mental
note never to let her go.

"Scully, would you mind very much if we stay together from now on?" 
He spoke against her mouth.  She chuckled through tears.

"Mulder, if you ever, ever let me go again I WILL shoot you!"  She
announced and grabbed his face between her hands, kissing him soundly
once again.  

From behind them, a childish voice called in excitement.  "Oh, Mama
and Dadda love each other?"

They turned and welcomed him into the circle of their embrace.  

"Yes, Will.  Dadda thinks Mama is the prettiest, smartest, most
wonderful person in the whole world, and Dadda is going to marry Mama
if she lets him."  

"I think Mama just might do that."  Scully answered as tears rolled
down her cheeks.  Mulder's face suddenly turned serious.

"Scully, I love you.  So much it hurts."

She was breathless.  "I love you, too."

The End