From: "The Fox" Date: Wed, 06 Mar 2002 01:10:21 +1100 Subject: xfc: Matters of The Mind by The Fox Source: xfc TITLE: Matters of the Mind AUTHOR: The Fox E-MAIL: xmarksthespot8@hotmail.com SPOILERS: None RATING: G CLASSIFICATION: M/S DISCLAIMER: My name isn't Chris! It's not even Frank! SUMMARY: Why are appearances so important? AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story was gathering dust in my hard drive and thought I'd take it out and see if it needed a shine over. Thanks Kimpa for the beta work and for your website! www.kimpart.com where my stories have been archived. (www.kimpart.com/foxden.html) XXXXXXX "Love looks not with the eyes, But with the mind..." William Shakespeare XXXXX Matters of the Mind by The Fox My mind can't seem to focus on the task at hand. These past couple of days have been strange, to say the least. Scully's been acting distant towards me and I'm not sure why. It's pissing me off to no end, but if I confront her it may distance her even more. Shit! Sometimes it can be so damned difficult to interpret her moods! I usually pride myself on being able to discern these things, but on occasion... I stare at the report I've half-written on the screen in front of me, not really seeing it and not able to finish as my eyes wander back to where Scully sits, tapping out her own report, her glasses perched perfectly on the bridge of her nose. As if she can feel eyes upon her, she shifts in her seat and turns her head in my direction. I quickly focus back on the screen and tap out a few nonsensical letters just to feign that I'm writing something. I delete the hieroglyphics and struggle to concentrate. Dammit! I can't and have to lean back in my chair, removing my glasses and stretch my legs out on the desk before me. I'm looking up at the ceiling and notice that there are still two pencils embedded in the ridges up there that haven't managed to defy gravity and fall back down to earth. I can hear Scully shifting in her seat again. She clears her throat and I take that as an indication she requires my attention. She's removed her own glasses and is staring at me with a touch of coldness in those intense blue eyes of hers. One eyebrow is arched. Shit! Translation: she's not happy with something in the report she's verifying or I have totally pissed her off. I raise my own eyebrows as best as I can to mirror her look, though there is no one I know that can pull off such a look of irritation as this petite woman can. She's not buying this, as she hasn't uttered a word, just staring at me coldly. I give in. "What?" "Mulder..." "What have I done, Scully?" Her eyes soften slightly at this comment and her posture relaxes. "What makes you think you've done anything?" "I don't know... You seem kind of... off color lately." "Off color?" "Yeah, not your usual jovial self." "Mulder, I'm hardly considered jovial on the best of days." "Well, you know what I mean." I receive another raised eyebrow. Fuck! Maybe I should've just kept quiet. I look back at my computer screen, trying to avoid those eyes. "Mulder?" Shit! "Yeah?" "Would you consider me attractive?" Whoa! This was something I was definitely not expecting! I feel my throat constrict and find it hard to swallow. My mouth has also gone dry. "Scully, what...?" "I'm sorry if that sounded very direct but I..." She looks down at her lap. "I overheard a conversation the other day..." "I didn't think you were the type to eavesdrop, Scully." I try to make light of this situation but she only looks up at me with a saddened expression. The smile that I was trying for crumbles. "Sorry Scully. What did you overhear?" She's wringing her hands in her lap, lowering her head again. Got to be either juicy or totally hurtful. "It was a comment about my appearance... about how I wasn't attractive -- couldn't attract -- and it was only the fact that I was good at my job that anyone paid attention to me..." Obviously hurtful. Her voice peters off and I wait to see if she's going to continue. She doesn't and I guess I'm left to give my opinion. Whatever anyone says, psychologists do not have all the answers and I'm out of practice! I realize now that this comment was the reason for her recent distance. You would think remarks like that would've been left in the schoolyard but unfortunately the human race has faults that continue on until they die. I pop the last sunflower seed on the desk in my mouth, exhale the breath I'd been holding and move toward Scully. I take her delicate hand in both of mine. It's cold. I just want to take her in my arms and comfort her right now but I somehow think this would be more threatening so I squat beside her, still holding her hand. "Scully, whoever said that is obviously jealous and you shouldn't bother your intellect with those kinds of comments anyway." "So you agree?" She looks up at me and I can see her eyes are damp with unshed tears. Oh shit! How can she turn what I've said into a negative statement? "Scully, you're not listening to me." "You think that my intelligence is far greater than my appearance." "I didn't say that! Scully..." She starts to pull her hand away and shift slightly towards her computer. I don't allow her to do so and keep her hand firmly in mine. "Scully..." I continue on, slowly and calculate my thoughts as precisely as I can so I don't fuck up the whole situation. "You are very attractive but to only see your outer beauty is a waste. You have an extremely intelligent and beautiful mind and to actually see that beyond your totally sexy outer self, is something to be treasured, honored in fact." Her eyes are still lowered so I can't surmise if this has worked. I feel moisture on the back of my hand. A teardrop. Aww fuck! I thought I had this situation under control. What makes me think that Scully would want to hear these things from me anyway! Scully tilts her head up and I can see a tear track on her left cheek but she's smiling. Be still my beating heart! "Thank you, Mulder." With those words I know that everything's now okay again. This time I don't hesitate and fold her into my arms, kissing the crown of her head as she wraps her arms around my neck. XXXXX