Disclaimer:  These characters belong to Chris Carter and Fox TV.  No 
copyright infringement is intended, although I didn't ask first.  

Summary:  This vignette would have taken place after Mulder's New Mexico 
experience. His mother comes to visit to see how he is, and one day they 
have a heart-to-heart.

Mother and Son
  by Pamela Olumoya (polumoya@umd5.umd.edu)


"Maybe we can talk it over."  There was no raised inflection at the end 
of her sentence.  She had an all-business demeanor that turned most of 
her questions into statements.

Her son, sitting across from her in the living room of his apartment, 
kept his face expressionless, not ready to commit any emotion until he 
was sure of the topic. He waited.

"I need to know it's okay...that we're okay." Her gaze was unwavering.  
"If I could have, you know I would have protected Samantha, you *know* I 
would have.  There was nothing I could do. Absolutely nothing."

The topic known, the emotions hit the son like a punch from Muhammad Ali. 
He sifted through them to see if compassion was among them.  It  wasn't.

"Mom, when you didn't say anything you became part of it."

"Don't...don't attempt to take the higher moral ground here. It's not 
fair. You didn't live it, not from my perspective. I did what I thought I 
had to do." When the mother blinked, two fat tears escaped from her blue 
eyes.

"Oh, don't fall apart on me, not now!  Just, please, keep on doing 
whatever the hell it was that got you through the past 24 years.  Call on 
that inner strength that gave you those stoic qualities that saw me 
through my formative years!" The son was on his feet now, the anger could 
not be contained in a body at rest.

"I knew you were a man in possession of a solitary quest and a 
particularly sarcastic wit, but I didn't know you were capable of such 
cruelty."

"Cruelty? Try honesty." 

"Forgive me if losing my daughter proved to be just a bit more than I 
could handle rationally.  It's been 24 years and I could swear it 
happened yesterday.  I will never get over it and I won't apologize to 
you or anyone else--"

"What about Samantha?  I don't want an apology, but I can't speak for my 
sister."

The mother closed her eyes. The hurt was actually tangible.  She frowned 
painfully and shook her head. It was a victory the son thought he would 
enjoy, but he didn't.

He said, "I completely understand about never getting over it.  But, you 
*knew*--

"Fox, I didn't know all of it--"

"You knew enough. And what you didn't know, Dad certainly did!  Can you 
imagine how that makes me feel?  I know why I'm apparently so comfortable 
being up to my eyeballs in this cesspool of lies and deceit I call my 
life. I'm in my native habitat.  It's second nature to me."

"What would have been the point in telling you, Fox?" The mother sighed. 
"We wanted to protect you...to shield you.  Not to expose you to it and 
make your whole life..."

"...into what? One long solitary quest?  I think Alanis Morissette has 
this situation covered."

"What?"  The mother wanted to know.

"Nothing." The son had nothing else to say.  He didn't leave, though.  
That would have been the easiest thing for him to do, but he stayed in 
the room with the mother. The silence was deafening, but at least it 
wasn't lonely.  They had each other, they were together.

The mother breathed the silence deep into her soul. She didn't really 
know him anymore.  How could he be so unforgiving she thought, but then 
she immediately knew the answer.  No doubt he'd acquired that trait from 
her.  She said, "Fox, I love you.  I don't want to think that I have lost 
both of my children." 

Before the words were out she had flashed back to the night Bill had 
expressed exactly the same sentiment to her-he hadn't wanted to lose what 
was remaining of his family. She recalled being unable to stomach being 
in the same room with him, though, and telling him exactly that. The fact 
that Fox was still there gave her hope. 

"You haven't lost me.  I'm here." The son could not remember the last 
time anyone had told him they loved him. That gave him even more to think 
about.
 
He couldn't come to her, she knew that, so she went to him.  She touched 
his shoulder, unsure of herself, afraid he would move away.  When he 
didn't, she touched his hair and wanted to wish away all the years that 
had passed since the last time she had done that one simple act.  God, 
where had the time gone?  She looked at him and smiled. 

He managed to return a smile because she was his mother and, when all was 
said and done, that had to count for something. Besides, there had been 
enough pain and separation in this family.  He would not be responsible 
for one iota more. "We're going to be okay, Mom." the son said. He hugged 
his mother.

 
The End
(comments appreciated)