From: Gillian Scully Date: Thu, 18 Jul 2002 15:46:09 -0400 (EDT) Subject: Fanfic Source: direct Title: Mulder is that you? Author: Starbuckmsr Rating: PG Keywords: Mulder/ Scully/ Romance Feedback: It is welcomed, I don't mind @ ahabs_lil_girl@hotmail.com Disclaimer: I'm pretty sure you know whom they belong to!!!!! If not there is something really wrong with you. Summary: Mulder has to go away but then he comes back. The only thing different is that, no one knows if it's really Mulder. ______________________________________________________________________ __ Mulder is that you? "Do you have to go?" "Yes, but I'll only be gone for 2 months then I'll be back. I promise." "What if something happens I mean, I'm not there, no one is?" "I'll be safe okay?" "Okay. I love you." "I love you to." ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^ 2 years and 4 days later I walk into the exam room next to his only to see them standing around him, I watched as they do an exam of him, take his blood, his dental records, everything. I stare at him wondering if it is really him or some man trapped in his body, they ask him questions but he can't answer them because he doesn't know any them. I can't stand it anymore I walk out of the room into the hallway. Skinner follows me. I know he's concerned about me right know, I lost him before and know I lost him again only this time I don't think I'll get him back. "Are you okay? You would like to get some coffee?" "No I'm fine and no think you I don't want to leave, I'll be fine." "You know who he is, but he doesn't understand who he is, he doesn't recognize anyone not even you." "I told him 2 years ago not to go, or that I'll go with him or someone will but just not alone. He didn't listen to me, he never really does, he thought he knew the best for both of us but he was wrong and now look what happen." "It's not your fault, and it isn't his either. Scully listen to me, he will get better all we have to do is bring him around stuff that he can remember, maybe that will help him a little or maybe not at all. No one knows for sure, we'll just have to wait and see." "WE don't have time, my son is at home with no father, he is 5 years old, the last time he saw him was when he was 3 years old, I kept pictures of him around the house to remind David of his father but he doesn't even recognize him anymore, when Dave was 1 he said his first word, dada, and he pointed to Mulder, but now when I show him pictures of him, he asked 'Who is that man mommy?'. Do you know how hard it is for me when our son asks that? But you see you wouldn't because you don't have any children and you probably never will, so when you become a father then you can tell how much time we have, until then don't even try." I turned before Skinner could say anything more, I didn't need this right know all I wanted was my lover back with his family where he belongs, not here. ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~ I walk into the exam room that he is in, he's sleeping, all I want to do is grab him and never let him go again, not for anyone. I put my hand on his hand, its warm it feels the same way it did before he left. My mind takes be back to 2001 when I got him back the first time he felt the same way as he does know, I hear on the radio Ready for Love by India Arie, I've never hear of it before but it's a lovely song. I am ready for love Why are you hiding from me I'd quickly give my freedom To be held in your captivity I am ready for love All of the joy and the pain And all the time that it takes Just to stay in your good grace Lately I've been thinking Maybe you're not ready for me Maybe you think I need to learn maturity They say watch what you ask for Cause you might receive But if you ask me tomorrow I'll say the same thing I am ready for love Would you please lend me your ear? I promise I won't complain I just need you to acknowledge I am here If you give me half a chance I'll prove this to you I will be patience, kind, faithful and true To a man who loves music A man who loves art Respect's the spirit world And thinks with his heart I am ready for love If you'll take me in your hands I will learn what you teach And do the best that I can I am ready for love Here with a offering of My voice My Eyes My soul My mind Tell me what is enough To prove I am ready for love I am ready I fall sleep next to him my head on his chest, it feels good like it always does but he also feels weird, when he wakes all he is going to know this that some women is laying on his chest, a women he doesn't recognize. I wake up before he does my mother must have come over during the night to see how I was, for know she is sleeping out in the hall with David in the chair next to her. I walk out of the room to lay beside Dave. I take him hand into mine, he's so young he doesn't know what's going on, he could think I'm hurt or his grandmother is. I must have fallen asleep again, because the next thing I know Mulder puts his hand on my shoulder. "Can I talk to you miss?" He helps me up and we stand together in the hall way, I stare in his eyes, their so deep I can't even see myself. We continue to his room, he sits on his bed, I take the chair. "I had a dream last night, its nothing like I dreamt before, you were in it and some little boy was in it, there was also another person who looked like me noise and everything. They said that their names were Scally." "Scully, David and Mulder?" "Yes how did you know?" "My name is Scully, your name is Mulder and we have a little boy together his name is David." "Oh, why am I here?" "It's a long story, but 2 years ago, you had to go away for 2 months well when the 2 months were up you didn't come back, the FBI looked every where for you, for almost half a year, the never did find you, until now." "So your telling me that my name is Mulder and you I mean we have a little boy together?" "Yes." "This all is really weird for me right know." "It is for me too, I have a 5 year old son wanting to know why he doesn't have a father like all the other little boys and I don't have a answer for him because I don't know where he's father is or went." We talked for hours he wanted to know more about this person he was supposed to be. "I'm sorry for not being the person you want me to be." What could I say to a man who doesn't know who he is? That everything is going to be okay and that he will remember who he is one day? He probably wont ever remember him self or anyone that loves him again. How could I live with my self when my baby's daddy is some where that he will never see him again? "I have to go." "Do you have to I mean can't you stay for a little bit longer please?" "I'm sorry I can't." I run out of the room before he say anything more. What have I done to deceiver this? Have I don't been a good enough mother to my child? What? What is it? I walk out of the hospital I see my son in his car seat wanting out to come to me. My mother lets him out and he runs to me, I take him in my arms glad that I still have a part of Mulder with me even though he is now where to be found. I can still feel him hand reach away. He's trying to get back to me I know it, but he's somewhere, where people take other persons life just for the fun of it, they think it will make then happy to know that someone else is sad. "Mommy is my daddy coming home?" "No David he's not coming home. But we are." I turn, not wanting ever to come back to this place; I take my son's hand and walk to my car. "You ready Dana?" "Yeah mom I'm ready let's go home." ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~ The end Author's not: Near the end of written this story I found out that my cousin was killed in a car accident, he was only 27 years old, had a 1 year old son. Thanks I hope you enjoy.