From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org
Date: Wed, 27 Dec 2000 12:05:33 -0600
Subject: Music and Passion Part 1 by Dana E. Vassy
Source: direct

Reply To: scullys_no_slut@viceprez.fsnet.co.uk


Title: Music and Passion (1/4)
Author: Dana E. Vassy
Rating: G
Category: Mulder angst, M/F marriage (references) MSR
Spoilers: Um, Je Souhaite?  Not much really..
Disclaimer: Sometimes, I take musicals and songs and mix 
them up with the X-Files.  My therapist says it helps, so 
Chris, Fox, 1013 don't deny me.  You'll have them back 
intact (unless you make a hash of season 8) The rights of 
Rodgers & Hammerstein, and Barry Manilow are noted and 
shamelessly monopolised.  But don't make me set Hillary on 
you...
Feedback: She sits there so refined, and drinks herself 
half blind.  Send thoughts to 
scullys_no_slut@viceprez.fsnet.co.uk while I can still read 
em..
Summary: Mulder needs a favour, which results in a theme 
wedding, dancing and a realisation.  Inpsired by the Barry
Manilow songs 'Copacbana' and 'Ready To Take A Chance Again'
Distribution: Yes to Gossamer/Legacy.  Anyone else, please 
ask first.  I'll say yes, in all likelihood..


***Thursday evening, 6:10pm***

Mulder stared blankly at the card in front of him.  Why had 
he left it so damn late?  It was typical of his slapdash 
lifestyle: something he had tried to rectify, without 
success, for many years.  And now he was left rather 
foolishly with egg on his face.

He had one last hope - a saviour so many times in his past.  
Something he took for granted, but valued more than life 
itself.  He hoped this occasion wouldn't be the exception 
that proved the rule.

Ten past six.  Scully was late.  The realisation of this 
fact hardly inspired him with confidence. She would refuse, 
laugh in his face and make him feel guilty.  But for the 
sake of pride, he had to ask.

Five minutes passed, and Scully breezed in the front door.  
Laden with Chinese food and videos, she was puzzled by the  
look of relief on Mulder's face.  Surely he wasn't that 
hungry for Thursday night take out?

Making a beeline for the kitchen, she awaited Mulder's 
inevitable interference.  Given that some of his cupboards 
hadn't been opened in ten years for health reasons, he 
seemed pretty intent on dishing up the flavoured meats and 
rice.  Small talk ensued over the latest case, baseball and 
who was dating whom in the Bureau.  Mulder winced as his 
subconscious brutally reminded him of the redhead he wasn't 
dating.  The same redhead who stood in front of him, 
wielding a barbecue rib like a deadly weapon.  He tried to 
console himself with the fact that he was following at 
least one protocol.  It nearly worked.

Having negotiated the food onto plates, and after having 
demolished half the starter before leaving the kitchen, 
Mulder and Scully perched on opposite ends of the well-worn 
sofa.   The plates made warm indentations on their laps, 
until Scully rose to insert a tape into the VCR.  Mulder 
winced as the opening titles rolled onto the screen.  Dirty 
Dancing.  The thought of Jennifer Grey and Patrick Swayze 
almost put him off his Peking duck.

But Scully's face was animated, chewing happily in time to 
the music.  She was an entirely different person when it 
came to movies.  The strict, meticulous Dana Scully became 
girly and even childish over a stomach-churning romance.  
Mulder suspected she probably owned them all: Casablanca, 
The Way We Were, Sleepless In Seattle, and so on.  Maybe it 
was her escape, her release.  Similar to himself - the 
contradiction of the sporty intellectual, who could be 
easily contented in either a library or a gym.  And if he 
knew anything about Scully, it was that she was rarely one-
dimensional. There was far more to her essence than what he 
had gleaned, and he only hoped to learn more through 
additional years together.

Like this Thursday night routine.  A while back, it would 
have seemed preposterous.  Socialising so intentionally 
might have appeared dependent or needy.  But now there was 
no pretence, they were life to each other.  The need for 
personal space was respected; they went home alone to bed.  
Mulder knew this close friendship was more than he 
deserved, and could never surrender to his carnal desires 
for something more.  To have lived just knowing Dana Scully 
would let him die happy, and he knew she was grateful of 
his presence at least some of the time.  

The food disposed of, they settled back in their respective 
corners of the couch.  Catching Scully's eye, Mulder began 
to make mock choking sounds.

    "Please...Scully...the sappiness is killing me..."

She simply glared at him, and began to tap her small feet 
in time to the dance scene now playing out on the video.

    "How many other people would you subject to this, huh? 
Is it your preferred mode of torture?"

His sarcastic tone and calculated pout got a proper 
reaction.

    "Mulder, you're my friend.  It's part of the job 
description.  I still haven't forgiven you for the 
Caddyshack incident."

There it was, the perfect cue for his invitation.  The 
chance he had needed, and Scully had gifted it to him.  
With that as an omen, there was no way she could refuse.

   "Scully, since friends do these favours..."

She burst out laughing at that point, leaving a bewildered 
Mulder to gape at her.  Then he realised what he had just 
said.  Joining in her raucous laughter, he was glad of the 
break in his personal tension.

    "I didn't intend to proposition you for sexual favours.  
Unless you're offering?"

Before she could suppress her giggles and answer, he 
plunged on.

    "The favour I need is fairly innocent.  An old friend 
of mine is getting married on Saturday.  She was my 
girlfriend for a very brief time..."

Scully's expression changed momentarily. If he hadn't been 
focused so intently on her, he might have missed the 
flicker.  But surely it wasn't jealousy?

    "The thing is, a lot of people I used to know will be 
there.  I can't get out of it, and it would be open season 
on me if I were to show up without a date.  I'd be 
avalanched with mockery from all the arrogant ones, and 
pity from all the 'smug marrieds'.  So could you possibly 
accompany me, if it's not any inconvenience?  I'll let you 
choose the movie for the next month if you do..."

Scully seemed lost in thought, like someone trying to 
recall a fragment of a long-forgotten song.  She let him 
hang on a little while longer.

    "I'll help you out just this once.  But you'll have to 
cover for me tomorrow, while I pick out an outfit."

Success!  Just one last hurdle to overcome.  His zany 
friends would take a little explaining.

   "Well, that's dealt with.  You see, it's a civil 
ceremony, and these people have sort of strange ideas.  A 
lot of them went to university with me in England.  There's 
a theme."

    "If it's Star Trek, I revoke my acceptance."

Mulder almost laughed aloud at the mix of sarcasm and panic 
in Scully's voice.  He could have so much fun with this.

    "Nope, these are pretentious literary types, Scully.  
We've been asked to dress as a romantic couple from the 
theatre - Anna and the King of Siam to be precise."

Her face contorted, at first appearance, in rage.  But as 
Scully dissolved into another fit of laughter, Mulder knew 
he was home safe.  He had solved his crisis, and would show 
up with a beautiful date to this crazy wedding.  All that 
remained was to make arrangements for the coming Saturday.



Title: Music and Passion (2/4)
Author: Dana E. Vassy


Saturday AM

Mulder knocked sharply on Scully's door to no response.  
She was probably drying her hair, or something else that 
made females dally for hours.  He felt more than 
stupid in his rich red costume, only just concealed by his 
navy trenchcoat.  The idiotic slippers were in his 
overnight bag, replaced temporarily by his black high tops.  
He was a fashion disaster and he knew it.

Growing impatient, he used his key to access Scully's 
immaculate apartment.  Only today, the floor was littered 
with emptied bags and cosmetics.  Picking up a discarded 
tin of mousse, he followed the sounds of dance music 
emanating from Scully's bedroom.

Finding the door ajar, he was greeted by a rather 
incredible sight.  There was Scully, dressed in jeans and 
blouse, dancing discreetly to a familiar song.  He coughed 
politely, leaving her to be mortified upon discovering his 
presence.

It took a moment before she sauntered over to stop the CD 
in a nonchalant fashion.  Turning on him, she had fully 
recovered.

    "You didn't get the hairstyle then?"

    "What?  No. It may have suited Yul Brynner, but not me. 
You're not dressed."

    "Mulder, I will not be driven 40 miles in a skirt that 
big.  I would suffocate in such a small space.  I've done 
my hair and make-up, I'll change when we get there."

Mulder cast an appreciative glance at her handiwork.  
Scully could look beautiful covered in slime, but when she 
made this effort, she was breathtaking.  Her hair was swept 
up in the style Mulder could never work out.  It didn't 
seem possible for hair to be twisted so differently, but it 
was stunning.  The little curls on the crown of her head 
sparkled with tiny adornments, catching the light each time 
she moved.  Her make-up seemed darker, more pronounced.  
His colour blindness made it difficult to be accurate, but 
her face shone with a healthy glow.  He could take her 
dressed like that and she's still be the most looked at 
woman in the room.

Putting impure thoughts aside, he lifted Scully's covered 
dress and overnight case.  The accommodation meant they 
could relax and have a drink, without worrying about the 
journey home.  Separate rooms were compulsory, emphasising 
the loneliness of Mulder's life.  He was closing in on 
forty, going to his old friend's wedding.  	He was taking 
his colleague as his date, but who else was there to ask?

He hadn't had an actual girlfriend since is divorce in 
1991.  Nine long years, he had filled the gaps with one-
night stands and his work.  She had broken his heart all 
those years ago.  He had forgiven her infidelity with one 
of his co-workers, blamed himself for being engrossed in 
his quest.  Then she had ended it without warning, leaving 
for Berlin.  She had written just once, a month later, to 
tell him she had aborted their baby.  It was the first time 
he had known she was pregnant.

For years, he had shut himself off.  It was easier to play 
the joker.  A flippant remark and casual flirting meant no 
one got close enough to hurt you.  Sex was available, if 
the sacrifice was the lack of love involved.  Drunken 
flings interspersed freely with a porn obsession for a 
while.  Then, even that got too heavy, when he started to 
care for one of the many women.  He wasn't prepared to take 
the chance again.   So he had been practically celibate for 
eight years, purposefully after Scully had been assigned.  
Romance in the workplace was a personal taboo; the FBI 
standpoint hardly mattered.

Everyone assumed Mulder's misanthropy stemmed from the 
covert disappearance of his sister.  Scully and others 
added the shadowy government forces to his reasoning.   But 
none of them knew his agony, why he couldn't physically 
endure a repeat of the pain Diana had caused him.  And no 
one could appreciate the anguish that accompanied his 
feelings for Scully.  He had learned long ago that assuming 
too much could only cause pain.



Title: Music and Passion (3/4)
Author: Dana E. Vassy


Little was said on the drive there.  Inane chatter about 
the type of people who would be there - the bride and 
groom, and other such people from Mulder's past.  Scully 
made a casual comment about how everyone seemed to be 
married now; they were the odd ones out.  Mulder cringed 
inwardly, and acknowledged her comment quietly.  It would 
be a long day.

Mulder waited anxiously in his room.  Had Scully forgotten 
to call for him, and headed downstairs alone?  He fidgeted 
with the soft material of his slippers, and cast another 
glance at the adjoining door.  Its closed nature seemed to 
be mocking him.

But before he could consider barging in on Scully, the door 
slid back to reveal a vision.  In the doorway stood an 
apprehensive yet beautiful woman, swathed in an exquisite 
ball gown.  Her pale shoulders looked softer than silk 
above the ivory satin of her gown.  For a moment, Mulder 
forgot his pain and mistrust; he was captivated.  She moved 
towards him, as though in a dream.  Instinctively, he 
reached for her hand. In a second of madness, he nearly 
swept her in for a kiss, but caught himself in time.  
Instead, he gave her a patented Mulder smile.

    "Mrs Anna."

    "Your Majesty.  Don't let your ego get overrun with 
this royalty idea though.."

Smiling fondly, Mulder ushered them through the external 
door, locking it behind him.  They hurried downstairs for 
the service.

Mulder survived the service, silently acknowledging waves 
and smiles from his friends.  There had been no time to 
talk, but Mulder knew they could catch up at the reception.   
Plenty of appreciative looks were thrown Scully's way, 
though she seemed oblivious.

He was surprised to see her cry at the vows.  He felt a 
different emotion welling up inside him.   Unconsciously, 
he draped a supportive arm across her slim shoulders.  
Scully made no move to dismiss him, rather she settled 
against the support he gave, welcoming it.

Soon, the formalities were dispensed with.  Claire and 
Robert were legally married, and the guests filtered out 
into the garden with the marquee.

Mulder had barely stepped inside the tent, when a quite 
overbearing female accosted him.

    "Fooox!  How are you?  It's been so long.."

    "Good to see you, too Elizabeth.  I'm doing just 
great."

    "It must be hard to see your ex-girlfriend married off.  
At least you have a date, if only for appearance and all 
that.  Are you going to introduce us?"

Mulder was taken aback at her perception.  He licked his 
dry lips in preparation, ready to admit that this was in 
fact a sympathy date.  But the warm arm slipping 
possessively around his waist interrupted him.

    "My name is Dana.  Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not 
a pity date.  Fox and I have been together for about a year 
now. We're very happy, as you can imagine.  I tell you, 
Claire must have been crazy to let him go.  But obviously, 
I'm glad she did."

Mulder was astounded. Had he heard correctly?  Elizabeth 
seemed firmly put in her place.  And he wasn't sure who was 
most surprised when Scully stood on tiptoe to plant a firm 
kiss on his lips.  She met his eyes fiercely as their lips 
parted, giving him an intense stare before turning fully 
back to his old friend.

   "It was lovely to have met you.  Sorry if I ruined any 
preconceptions."

With that, she grabbed Mulder's arm and dragged him deeper 
into the throng of people.  He muttered a quick goodbye to 
Elizabeth, and followed Scully in a semi-daze.

   "Uh, Scully? What was that?" he ventured as they stopped 
on the edge of the dance floor.

    "Mulder, you're only single because of the work we do.  
I get that patronising crap from my own friends.  So why 
don't we just stop them, if only for today?  Give them 
something to talk about, instead of letting them pity us?"

   "I have to admit, it's appealing."

    "Then we're agreed.  But I'm not your colleague today.  
I'm the rich and successful Dr Dana Scully MD.  I'm a 
cardiovascular surgeon, just transferred here from San 
Diego to be with you.  We met at a Knicks game last year, 
and went on holiday to Europe over Christmas.  We have lots 
of fun, and interesting, though busy lives.  Okay?"

Mulder accepted the barrage of information with a good-
natured grin.  He saw the frustration in Scully's eyes, and 
decided that they could break the mould for just one day.

   "I should be worried about how easily you concocted 
that, Dana"

    "Don't be Fox.  It's how I pictured my life when I was 
at med school."

Before he could reply, he was merrily greeted by his friend 
Robert, the happy bridegroom.  Claire stood close by, then 
echoed Robert's greeting.  Thus, hours of introductions and 
reunions ensued, with Mulder and Scully playing the love 
struck couple.  Some guests even asked when their own 
wedding was likely to be.  Mulder surprised himself by 
commenting that it would be "hopefully soon".



Title: Music and Passion (4/4)
Author: Dana E. Vassy


The band had played enough popular tunes to keep the dance 
floor busy all night.  Through all the reunions, Mulder had 
been dragged off by various friends to dance.  In four 
hours, he hadn't managed to dance with Scully, since just 
about every man in the place had asked for her company on 
the floor.  Mulder supposed it for the best, dancing wasn't 
his favourite sport.  Scully seemed distracted, talking 
politely to her partner, but holding back somehow. Probably 
due to the unfamiliarity of everyone, he mused.

He met her eyes as the cheesy tune ended.  Crossing the 
dance floor, Scully met him at the buffet table.  She was 
flushed with the exertion of dancing, dragging the weight 
of her huge dress all the while.

    "Enjoying yourself Scully?"

    "Ssh, it's Dana.  And yes, your friends are charming 
people."

He paused for a moment, toying with the rim of his 
champagne flute.

    "You're holding back on something.  It's got me 
intrigued."

It was Scully's turn to fidget, playing the naive card as 
her trumps.

   "There's nothing really, Mulder.  It's just tempting to 
go a little mad with all the alcohol and music."

Mulder considered her words carefully.  It made sense, who 
wouldn't want to let loose whilst living such a restricted 
life?  He knew the urge to lose himself in something, 
forget about life, even for five minutes.  And as he saw 
Scully's eyes light up when the band began their next 
number, there was no doubt as to what he ought to do.

   "May I have this dance?"

Scully smiled almost shyly, and offered her hand to be led 
into the crowd.

They began to move discreetly, touching each other lightly 
as their bodies swayed with the rhythm.  Mulder almost 
laughed aloud as the lyric began; it was the song Scully 
had been dancing to in her bedroom.

****Her name was Lola
    She was a showgirl
    With yellow feathers in her hair...***

He had known a few 'Lola' dancers in his time.  Funny, but 
with Scully in such close proximity, he couldn't quite call 
these other women to mind.  But he could notice the 
suppressed smile on Scully's face.  Well, she wasn't going 
to hold back anymore.  He leaned in to whisper in her ear.

    "Let go Scully.  Just for today, don't be your usual 
self.  Be the wild Dana who dances like a dervish.  Enjoy 
yourself."

She looked surprised by his intimation.  But her reply 
wasn't quite what he expected.

    "Only if you do."

    "What?"

    "Diana.  Work.  Samantha.  Let it cease to exist.  Just 
feel the music.  Live it, Mulder..."

He was taken aback, but closed his eyes and let the Latino 
rhythms pound through him.  The music was in him, under his 
skin.  Working in and out like probing fingers, deeper with 
every note.  He began to understand, to feel.  And he let 
go.

Later, he was aware of the twirling, the jumping, the 
gyrating of his body.  The twisting and gesturing she used 
to keep in perfect time wit the music.  She was the most 
beautiful and passionate dancer he had ever seen.  How he 
had spun Scully, clearing the dance floor for only them.  
Every time they moved apart, she would come back, pressing 
tighter and tighter against his pulsating body.  He was 
only conscious of the music, and of her.  He could close 
out everything but her.  And suddenly, he felt his 
resistance vanish.

It was wonderful, to be so dizzy, so close to the edge.  
Here there was no pain, only sound and colour.  It felt 
good to lose control; problems weren't his to deal with.  
What felt even better was the pressure of Scully's body on 
his.  The heat she radiated, some sort of protective force.  
She was telling him she wouldn't hurt him.  Emotion like 
this could save him.  Love, lust and most of all trust.  He 
was complete.

The song ended, to rapturous applause from the gathered 
dancers.  Most hadn't known Mulder could even dance, never 
mind upstage John Travolta.  But the people paled, they 
meant nothing.

All that mattered was Scully.  Flushed and excited, 
standing before him, trying to deflect the attention.  She 
looked up expectantly.  He seized the moment.

It was impossible, even with hindsight, to separate the 
next few minutes.  How the kiss had begun was a mystery, he 
just knew their lips had met and the world had stopped.  
Cliched perhaps, but all that he could conceive of was the 
taste and feel of her mouth - warm, moist and insistent.  
Maybe it should have been a chaste kiss, a prelude. But it 
was too late, seven years too late, for that.  They were 
devouring each other, lost in the passionate haze the music 
had created.

Sometime afterwards, the music had started again, and they 
had separated their lips.  Physically at least.  Mulder was 
on fire, the sensation of the kiss still reverberating 
through his nervous system.  He pulled her closer, wrapping 
his arms around her for the slow dance.  She melted against 
his chest, moulding to him instantly.  It all felt so 
right.

Eventually, they left the floor. Time to talk. 

   "I think they might believe you're a real date now, 
Scully."  Mulder found it difficult to breathe calmly, 
blurting the words out like a startled teenager.

   "I'm glad I could help.  Seems we both needed that."

She met his inquisitive gaze with one of her own.  Scully 
was obviously searching for the right words, and for the 
first time it occurred to Mulder that it might not have 
meant as much for her.  Blind panic set in, as he waited 
for her speech.

   "Are you willing to take the chance Mulder?  Did that 
mean as much as it felt like?  Tell me it was temporary 
insanity, and I can walk away from it.  I won't pretend 
that's what I want to hear though."

Amazing.  Scully wanted him, despite all the flaws and 
unresolved issues.  She was reaching out, and he was only 
too glad to grab on.  It wouldn't be plain sailing; he 
wasn't so naive. But it was worth a try.

And unlike Diana, Scully could never hurt him.  She wasn't 
capable of it.  He only hoped he was enough to satisfy her, 
and more.  If not, he would happily die trying.

   "I'm ready and willing Scully, if you're sure."

   "As sure as I've ever been.  I want to help you heal, 
Mulder, it's been too long with you in pain. I love you."

Startled, Mulder let his own reply stumble out naturally.  
It was exactly what she had wanted to hear.

She gave him a coy smile.

   "Would it be rushing things to disappear up to my room, 
Mulder?"

He just grinned in answer.  Seven years was a respectable 
courting period.  Leading her by the hand, he tossed out 
goodbyes to anyone and everyone on the way.  But he didn't 
stop once.  He had an appointment for some long overdue 
therapy.

This story, unlike that of their 'characters' Anna and the 
King, wouldn't end in tragedy.  Now they realised the 
love they had, both would do anything to preserve it.  

And it gave him a damn good excuse to get out of this 
hideous costume.

"You remind me I live in a shell
Safe from the past
And doing okay
But not very well...

...When she left me in all my despair
I just held on
My hopes were all gone
Then I found you there

...And I'm ready to take a chance again
Ready to put my love on the line with you
Been living with nothing to show for it
You get what you get when you go for it
And I'm ready to take a chance again with you"

READY TO TAKE A CHANCE AGAIN, Barry Manilow