From mason@umr.edu Sun Nov 10 21:54:28 1996
Let's see... We're back to the MSR part.  And again, the medical speak is as 
close as I could get it without Kia's help.  My source for small children and 
pregnancy decided to go ahead and give birth again, so if there's any 
not-quite-right statements, I tried.  April can be forgiven because I get to 
be a godmother to Ms. Cara Marie, so it balanced out a little.  I just hope 
this doesn't mean I have to change more diapers than Missy does when one of us 
ends up babysitting.

Disclaimer: I know this will never happen on the TV show.  That's what fanfic 
is all about.  It's also about not owning the characters.  That privilege goes 
to Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox.  No harm intended.  Some mild third season 
spoilers apply.  The thing was too far gone, and I thought it was almost done 
by Oct 4th, so I didn't even THINK about referring to anything in the fourth 
season.  I swear the last few scenes and any similarities to new eps are pure 
cowinkidink.

Again, if parts don't make it to your server, e-mail me.  Responding on the 
newsgroup might not make it to me for four or five days.  The whole series is 
New Beginnings.  The sections will be subtitled but should still be considered 
to be under the main title.

New Beginnings III -- New Fears (1/4)
	II -- Old Issues
	I--Something New

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	Skinner stared at the haggard man across the desk from him.  Mulder 
had been back with the Bureau almost six weeks, ever since the cast had been 
removed and he had taken the required refresher courses.  And already, it 
looked like he had reverted to his old habit of staying the night in his 
office.  Mulder hadn't responded to his inquiries as the AD, so he tried as a 
friend.  "What is it, Fox?"

	Mulder met Skinner's worried eyes in surprise.  He lowered his gaze 
after a moment and stared at the blotter on Skinner's desk.  "Scully's 
pregnant.  Almost three months."

	Skinner now understood the haunted look.  Mulder was still wallowing 
in guilt over what he saw as his inability to protect his child.  "So Josh is 
going to have a half brother or sister?" he asked, remembering the discussion 
on their way back from Chicago.

	Mulder looked at him blankly for a moment and then realized this was 
the perfect way to let Cancerman and his associates know he was Josh's real 
father.  Like that was going to make a difference if this baby died.  
"Actually, sir," Mulder paused.

	Skinner wasn't certain if Mulder's hesitation was staged or if it was 
real.  Hell, he had known since Josh's birth who was the little boy's father 
so it must be for their listeners.

	"I'm Josh's real father," he said finally.

	Skinner knew it was time for his next line as the Confused AD.  "What? 
But Scully told me she had been artificially inseminated."

	He was a little surprised when Mulder stuck with his original story 
and again said, "She was."

	So they hadn't lied to him or just pulled his leg.  It made him feel a 
little better to know that.  "You were the," he paused over the word, "sperm 
donor?"

	"Yes," Mulder said simply without apologizing.

	Skinner smiled genuinely.  "Congratulations, Agent Mulder.  I take it 
this means you'll want to supervise more and let someone else handle the field 
work."  Ever since his return, Mulder had tried to be in the field as often as 
possible.  Skinner saw this as a way to maybe protect the confused man.

	Mulder nodded sadly.  He felt utterly defeated and obligated to say, 
"Whenever possible, sir."

	Skinner then realized that Mulder was terrified about this.  He wanted 
to reassure the other man, but he kept his mouth shut.  The bug in his office 
wouldn't allow him to say anything on that score and he felt a return of the 
tension he had always associated with worrying about Mulder.

	The younger man silently stood up and left without being dismissed.

	Skinner let him go.

		* * * * *

	He had gotten an earlier flight and was home two hours before she was 
expecting him.  But unlike what he expected, the apartment was quiet as he 
unlocked the door and set his bags down.  Her purse and briefcase marked the 
beginning of the clothing trail that headed toward the bedrooms.  He paused at 
the first door and saw Josh quietly playing with his toys in his crib.  The 
little boy's face lit up at the sight of his father and he extended his arms 
to be picked up.  Mulder hugged him close and said, "Hi, guy.  Did ya miss 
me?"

	"Dadda," he said simply and slobbered a kiss on Mulder's cheek.

	"It looks like you did.  Where's Momma?"

	"Sweepin."

	Mulder nodded as his suspicion was confirmed and continued into the 
other bedroom.  Scully was indeed out of it and looked like she had barely 
managed to pull the t-shirt over her head before she fell asleep.  He took the 
sight in for a moment and then quietly closed the door.

	"Are you hungry, guy?"

	Josh shook his head.  "Donawd's."

	That explained her near catatonic state.  McDonald's with Josh on a 
good day was exhausting.  After working for tento twelve hours, most likely 
not sleeping the night before, and ignoring the fact that she was four months 
pregnant, the little trip had worn her out.

	"Did you play on the slide?"

	The baby nodded and said, "Twing, too."

	"The Grimace Swing?"

	"Uh-huh."

	Mulder caught up on the little things that had happened in the past 
couple of days while he had been out of town.  He hadn't really needed to go 
for this case and now he felt guilty because he had.  He was going to have to 
stop running and face some issues he had been avoiding.  And so did Scully.

	As he listened to Josh, he threw together something for dinner for 
himself and Scully.  Mulder doubted that she had eaten anything more than a 
french fry or two, if she had eaten at all.  When dinner was all but ready, he 
went to wake her up so she could eat. But then he changed his mind.

	He watched her for a moment, his heart twisting in his chest.  Out of 
the corner of his eye, he saw that the alarm was already set, so he turned it 
off.  Right now her body was demanding rest more than it was food.  He then 
called the office and told the operator that neither one of them was going to 
be in the next day.  He didn't want to have what he knew was going to turn 
into an argument interrupted by the necessity of work. It would be one more 
thing to add to his growing list of sins, but he really didn't care at that 
moment.

	He spent the next few hours playing with Josh until the little boy's 
bedtime.  Then he dug into the stack of paperwork he still had to finish from 
two cases ago.  He was well and truly tired by the time he finally crawled 
into bed.  He laid down on his side and pulled her up against his chest.  She 
snuggled a little closer and he slowly fell asleep.

		* * * * *

	She awoke to bright sunlight and an empty bed beside her.  The state 
of the covers told her he had made it home last night, but she must have slept 
right through that and the alarm she had set.  Thinking about the alarm, she 
stretched and turned to look at the clock.  She gasped and quickly sat up, 
throwing the covers off of her.  It was after eight o'clock and she had a 
class at nine thirty.  Ignoring the waves of nausea her sudden movements had 
crashing over her, she rushed to the closet and pulled out a suit.

	"Mulder," she called.

	A second later he was in the doorway.  "Yeah?"

	She stared at him in his ratty t-shirt and sweats and Joshua still in 
his "Gargoyles" pj's.  "Why didn't you wake me?  I'm going to be late for my 
class."

	"I called in sick for us."

	She stopped searching for a pair of nylons and straightened to look at 
him.  "You did what?"

	"I called in sick.  For both of us."

	"I'm fine, Mulder," she said stiffly.

	"Yeah.  Right.  That's why you slept for thirteen hours straight.  
Breakfast is ready if you want any," he said and headed back down the hall.

	She sat down heavily on the bed.  He was right.  She had slept for 
over twelve hours.  The last thing she remembered was setting the alarm so she 
would be up by the time he got home.  Obviously that plan had failed.  As she 
sat there, trying to fortify her anger, her stomach let her know that she 
hadn't eaten in almost twenty four hours.

	She stood up, pulled on a pair of sweats, and went into the kitchen as 
well.  Josh had made his normal mess with his cereal and Mulder had made his 
usual, efficient use of the things in the kitchen.  She said good morning to 
the baby and sat to eat her meal in silence.

	Mulder knew he was in for it.  He had crossed the line and taken 
control of her career away from her.  It didn't matter that he had done it 
because he was worried about her.  It didn't matter that he had done it 
because he was worried about the baby she carried.  She was only going to see 
his actions as something negative.

	The silence grew with the things left unsaid until she had finished a 
small portion of the food in front of her.  When she tried to stand up, he 
reached for her wrist and held on.  He almost let go when her eyes blazed, but 
he didn't.  "We're going to talk."  He hid his cringe as she raised her 
eyebrow.

	"About?"

	"About me leaving on cases I don't have to go on and about you not 
taking care of yourself."

	"You mean we're actually going to discuss some important issues?"  She 
looked down at the hand that was still holding onto her.

	This time he did flinch at the sarcasm in her voice and let go of her 
wrist.  He was relieved when she sat back down, instead of leaving like he 
half expected her to do.  "There will be no more out of town cases unless it's 
absolutely necessary," he promised.

	"It's OK, Mulder.  I can take care of Joshua, the apartment, and my 
career by myself.  I wouldn't have wanted him if I had thought otherwise."

	"And what about the new baby?" he asked softly, trying to hide his 
pain at basically being told he wasn't needed.

	"I'm not pregnant, Mulder," she said firmly.

	For the briefest instant, he thought she had had a miscarriage or an 
abortion without telling him.  He had been gone often enough and long enough 
for her to keep it a secret if she wanted to, but he could see the fear in her 
eyes.  She wasn't just ignoring the fact that she was pregnant; she was 
completely denying it, even to herself.  "Oh, I must have misread a few things 
then.  Like the absence of your period, your morning sickness, the tenderness 
in your breasts --"

	"You've been gone so often, I could have my period every week and you 
wouldn't have known it.  And did you ever think about the flu, Mulder?  And 
how the hell would you know whether or not my breasts are tender? You haven't 
touched me in two months."  With that she stood up and left the room.

	He looked at Josh and then at the door she had gone through.  "Stay 
here, kid.  Mommy and Daddy will be right back."  He stood up and went after 
her.  "Dana."  She was already in the bedroom with the door closed.  He didn't 
feel like he could open it and braced his hands against the frame.  "Dana, 
talk to me."

	The door whipped open and she looked at him blankly.  "About what, 
Fox?"  She stressed his first name and he fought not to flinch at her tone.  
"My imaginary pregnancy or your refusal to be a part of this family."  She 
turned around and headed back to the closet to dig for shoes.

	His hands lowered to his sides and he stared at her.  Slowly, he 
stepped into the room.  "Either.  Both.  Just talk to me."

	"Fine.  I.  Am.  Not.  Pregnant.  End of discussion on that topic.  
And the other one?  What can I say about that?  It's your choice, Mulder.  I 
can do nothing about it."  She finished pulling out the necessary 
paraphernalia to get ready for work and started ironing her suit.

	He reflected on her emphatic statements.  Maybe she really wasn't 
pregnant.  And she was right.  He hadn't been home enough to find proof for 
his suspicions.  But he wasn't completely in the wrong.  "I had to leave on 
some of those cases."

	"I know that, Mulder.  But only some.  Not ALL of them.  And don't 
give me any bullshit about making sure the case was handled correctly.  Two of 
your trips weren't even related to the X-Files."

	He couldn't say anything, because she was right.  "I'm not going to be 
doing that any more.  You and Josh are the most important things in my life.  
And when he was taken, the fact was driven home.  It scared me and I was 
running," he confessed.

	"And you always thought I was the Queen of Denial."  She left the 
bedroom and he followed her to the bathroom.  "It took you four months to 
figure that out?  Hell, I had it in two days.  And you're the one with the 
psych degree," she mumbled as she stripped and stepped into the shower.

	He watched her through the frosted glass.  He wasn't the only one that 
was denying things.  They may not have made love for two months, but he hadn't 
forgotten what she looked like.  She had lost weight, but her breasts were 
larger and her normally flat belly had a small convex shape now.  "You're 
right, Scully.  I was running.  I realize it and I'm stopping.  I love you and 
we'll work through this."

	"What THIS, Mulder?"

	"I'm going to go see someone."

	Her hands dropped from massaging the shampoo into her hair and she 
peaked around the door.  "What?"

	"I'm going to go see a shrink."  That was going to be fun.  "I have a 
lot of things to work through about Josh's kidnaping and I can't let that tear 
us apart."  A voice inside his head asked if it wasn't already too late.

	The sound of Josh's bowl hitting the floor and his pleasure in the act 
broke their scrutiny of each other.  Scully closed the shower door and Mulder 
opened the bathroom one.

	She tried to convince herself that the tears forming were due to the 
soap running into her eyes.  She nodded at him through the glass and dunked 
her head under the running water as she tried to compose herself.  She heard 
Mulder leave and her head dropped to the warmed tiles.  Slowly, her hand moved 
to the firm texture of her lower abdomen and the tears fell freely.

	If he could face his feelings about the kidnaping, maybe she could 
face the possibility that she was pregnant.

		* * * * *

	He hated going to the doctor.  He knew everything the man was going to 
say and how he was going to say it before the idiot even opened his mouth.  
But he forced himself to sit through the sessions, just in case the doctor 
actually said something that would help him.  But it wasn't working.  Not 
really.  He still felt like he should have been able to stop the three men 
that had taken his son.  It didn't matter that they got the baby back.  It 
didn't matter that the men had connections that let them disappear.  He should 
have been able to stop them.

	And now they would have another baby to worry about.  If she carried 
to term.

	Scully had finally admitted she was pregnant and had started going to 
the doctor.  But that didn't mean she had moderated her schedule any or that 
she was taking better care of herself.  She was still going at full speed and 
scaring the shit out of him.  And Skinner.

	Skinner had noticed his still frazzled state after Mulder had reduced 
his own workload to a normal level and had demanded to know what was wrong.  
Mulder had shared his concerns over a beer after work and Skinner had quietly 
checked into it and only told Mulder afterwards.  Scully was taking on twice, 
occasionally three times, the normal workload at Quantico in addition to 
unofficially helping on the X-Files.  And Mulder didn't know how to get her to 
slow down.  He had tried to limit her assistance on his cases, but that had 
caused a misunderstanding that he didn't want repeated in the next several 
lifetimes.

	The inevitable finally happened, but he didn't feel any better for 
being right.

		* * end * *

End New Beginnings III -- New Fears (1/4)

From mason@umr.edu Sun Nov 10 21:55:52 1996
Let's see... We're back to the MSR part.  And again, the medical speak is as 
close as I could get it without Kia's help.  My source for small children and 
pregnancy decided to go ahead and give birth again, so if there's any 
not-quite-right statements, I tried.  April can be forgiven because I get to 
be a godmother to Ms. Cara Marie, so it balanced out a little.  I just hope 
this doesn't mean I have to change more diapers than Missy does when one of us 
ends up babysitting.

Disclaimer: I know this will never happen on the TV show.  That's what fanfic 
is all about.  It's also about not owning the characters.  That privilege goes 
to Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox.  No harm intended.  Some mild third season 
spoilers apply.  The thing was too far gone, and I thought it was almost done 
by Oct 4th, so I didn't even THINK about referring to anything in the fourth 
season.  I swear the last few scenes and any similarities to new eps are pure 
cowinkidink.

Again, if parts don't make it to your server, e-mail me.  Responding on the 
newsgroup might not make it to me for four or five days.  The whole series is 
New Beginnings.  The sections will be subtitled but should still be considered 
to be under the main title.

New Beginnings III -- New Fears (2/4)
	II -- Old Issues
	I--Something New

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	Mulder held onto the armrests with everything in him and silently 
urged the engines into high gear.

	This was it.

	No more.

	He would sit in the basement and do paperwork until the kids were in 
college, if that's what it would take, because there was no way he was leaving 
town again without her.  Ever.  He would rather feel powerless and ineffective 
at her side than be drowning in those particular feelings while he was two 
hundred miles away and no way to control how fast he was going to get home.

	The short commuter flight took an eternity and the cab ride wasn't any 
quicker.  He rushed through the corridors of the all too familiar place and 
found what he was looking for without a problem.  It was a little 
disconcerting to see the AD holding his son, but Mulder wasn't too surprised. 
After all, Skinner was the one that had called him as he was stepping off the 
plane and Skinner was the one that had called again while he was waiting for 
the next plane back, twenty minutes after he had arrived.

	"Hey, guy," he said and pulled the quiet baby into his arms.  
"Skinner?"

	"Maggie is in there now.  I thought it was best not to leave Josh at 
the daycare."

	"Thanks."  He turned and started for the door a few feet away.  He 
paused in utter terror.  "What..." He couldn't even form the question.

	"All I know is what I told you.  She collapsed during her lecture and 
was rushed here."  Skinner stood and slowly approached.

	Mulder nodded and held the little boy a little tighter against him.  
He stepped into the room, not having a clue as to what to expect.

	Maggie was sitting in the chair nearest the bed and was holding onto 
her daughter's hand.  Dana was lying still and pale with an IV and other 
various instruments hooked up to her.  The only things different about this 
scene from so long ago was the lack of respirator and the small, distended 
mound of her stomach.  Almost six months along and it was hard to tell she was 
even pregnant.  Josh had been twice as big by this point.

	He shot panicked eyes to his mother-in-law and felt Skinner's hand 
settle on his shoulder.  "Maggie?"

	"She went into labor, Fox.  But they managed to stop it."

	Mulder felt his chest constrict and his knees wobble.  He tried to 
pass the baby to Skinner, but Josh had a strangle hold around his neck.  He 
raised a shaking hand to smooth down the baby's fine brown hair and took a 
deep breath.  Slowly he covered the rest of the distance to her side.

	"Momma?"

	"She's just sleeping, Josh."  The baby nodded at his father's words 
and Mulder looked at Maggie for reassurance.  She nodded as well, and Mulder 
sat on the edge of the other chair.  He carefully gathered her hand that had 
the IV attached to it in his own and silently thanked a few entities that she 
was alright.

	"I don't give a shit if aliens land on the White House lawn, Skinner. 
I'm not leaving again."  He knew this was his fault.  If he hadn't rejoined 
the Bureau, he would have been home and made sure she had gotten more rest.  
Then he thought about who he was dealing with and knew that he would not have 
been able to do a damn thing about it.

	"You are so stubborn," he whispered bitterly as all of his muscles 
relaxed at once and he sank back in the chair bonelessly.  Her hand was so 
small and fragile in his and he watched her breathe for several minutes.  "But 
I love you, anyway."

	"Wuv Momma," Josh repeated and shifted in his father's arms to sit in 
his lap.

	"Yes, we love your stubborn momma."

	"Wuv tub-urn Momma," Josh said with a decisive nod and touched his 
parents' hands.

	Mulder wanted to crush the baby to him, but he held back.  He didn't 
want to scare the little guy any more than he already was, so he just sat 
there.  Eventually, Josh started getting restless and began playing with 
Mulder's tie and ID.

	He had been there almost an hour before a nurse came in to check on 
her.  He was a little amazed at his patience, but then he realized it was 
shock rather than acceptance that had kept him still for so long.  The nurse 
informed him that Scully had been given a mild sedative to make sure she 
rested and that she and the baby were doing fine.  When he demanded more 
details, he was told the doctor would be up to speak with him in a little 
while.

	Maggie stood up and held her arms out for Josh.  "Are you hungry, my 
little man?"  The baby nodded eagerly and waited to be picked up.  "Would you 
care to join us, Walter?"

	He nodded absently and held the door open for her to proceed him out 
of the room.  "We'll be in the cafeteria, Mulder, if you want anything."

	Mulder nodded but didn't answer.  He was too busy fighting the urge to 
wake Scully up and the equally large urge to let her catch up on some of her 
rest.

	It wasn't too long, though, before she woke up on her own.  "Mulder?"

	"I'm here, Dana," he said and tightened his grip on her hand.

	She turned her head toward him and groggily asked, "What happened?"

	"They said you collapsed during your lecture and went into labor," he 
said softly.

	With her free hand, she frantically felt her stomach.  "Oh, god.  The 
baby?"

	"They managed to stop it.  Your doctor should be here soon."  He 
brushed her hair away from her face and frowned when her eyes filled with 
tears.

	"I'm sorry, Mulder."

	"Hey, you're OK.  It's OK.  Ssshhhh."  He wanted to gather her into 
his arms, but until he knew how much danger she was still in, he wasn't going 
to chance anything.  He settled for leaning over her and softly kissed the 
tears away.

	"Josh?  Where's Josh?"

	"With your mom and Skinner.  They just left."

	She nodded weakly and then asked, "What happened in New York?"

	"Don't know.  Skinner called as I was getting off the plane.  I was 
back on it twenty minutes later."

	"Mulder.  What about the case?"

	"Somebody else can handle it," he said with a shrug.

	"But that's why you went in the first place.  They weren't making any 
progress."

	"They managed to catch criminals while I wasn't there before.  They 
can do it again."

	"Mulder --"

	"Dana.  I see you're awake."

	Mulder sat down, but kept a hold of her hand at the sound of Dr. 
Howard's voice.

	"Lisa?"  Scully asked in a soft voice.

	"It was close there, Dr. Scully.  If the response time of your 
students had been any slower, we wouldn't have been able to stop labor."  The 
soft features hardened.  "It was too damn close.  And you're not helping by 
not taking care of yourself.  You've lost weight since your last visit.  Your 
blood pressure is too high.  You're not getting enough rest.  The baby's 
weight is too low.  And this incident may have weakened the placenta's 
attachment to the uterus.  We'll need to keep a close eye out for spotting or 
any cramping at all."

	With each sentence, Scully retreated further into herself.  Mulder's 
ears hurt from the silence.  Finally, she asked, "How long will I be 
bedridden?"

	"I want you to stay here for another twenty-four hours.  And then you 
can go home."

	"Lisa, how long?"

	"Two weeks.  At least.  That means no work, Dana.  None.  I want you 
to rest and eat and then we'll do an ultrasound to make sure everything's 
alright.  If things have improved, I MIGHT give the OK for half days at work."

	She nodded in defeat.  "Fine."

	"I hate to say this, Dana, but you won't be able to take care of Josh 
for awhile either.  I don't want you exerting yourself in any way."

	She looked at Mulder.  "I'm sure Mulder is going to make sure I follow 
your instructions to the letter."

	"If you let me," he answered softly.

	Scully nodded and waited for Lisa to finish her list of demands.  She 
listened to every one and knew Mulder was memorizing them all.  She felt a 
flash of resentment work its way underneath the waves of love.  He meant well, 
but his protectiveness was often stifling.  She could deal with it before, but 
now... 

	Now he would be justified in thinking she couldn't take care of 
herself or her children.  The little trip to the hospital had proven that.

		* * * * *

	Mulder tucked Josh in and went to see if Scully needed anything.  He 
was worried when he received the same dejected response that had been a part 
of her since her release from the hospital three days ago.  He knew he was 
part of the reason she was depressed and he hoped his idea would work.

	"I need to go into the office for a couple of hours tomorrow," he said 
as he sat down on the bed.  He had stayed home the last few days to make sure 
she was alright.  He realized that they both needed a little time away from 
each other.

	She said, "Fine," but wouldn't look at him.  She just kept her eyes 
glued to the TV silently playing across the room.

	He moved and sat back against the headboard.  It was a while before he 
said, "I'll take Josh with me so you can have a few hours to yourself."  He 
was happy to note that she actually looked at him.  She didn't say anything, 
but her eyes weren't as vacant as they had been.  He watched the flickering 
images on the TV for a moment and then said, "I didn't know you liked Beavis 
and Butt-head, Scully."

	She reached for the remote and flipped the channel.  "You know I 
don't.  Josh must have hit one of the buttons."  They watched the news in 
silence for a few moments.  Then she said, "Mulder, could you bring him in 
here to sleep tonight?"

	"Dana, I don't think --"

	"Please.  I just need you both nearby."

	He smiled softly and leaned over to kiss her.  "OK.  I'll be right 
back."

	She nodded and watched as he got up.  Seconds later, he returned and 
laid Josh down in the middle of the bed.  The baby opened his eyes for a 
moment, smiled and then closed them again.  Tears stung her eyes as she kissed 
his forehead and pulled the covers up around him.  "I love you, Munchkin."

	Mulder took in the scene with a lighter heart.  He quickly undressed 
and joined his family under the covers.  "I love you, you know," he said as he 
tucked her hair behind her ear.

	"Yeah.  I know.  And I love you, too."  She was quiet for a moment and 
then, "The baby's moving again."

	His eyes closed in relief.  The baby had been way too quiet the last 
couple of days.  "No pain?"

	"No pain," she affirmed.

	"Good."

	"Mulder, I'm sorry," she said again.

	"I understand.  You know that, don't you?  I have the same fears as 
you do."

	"Yeah.  But your running didn't almost kill the baby."

	"Yes, it did.  Because I wasn't here for you."

	"Yes, you were.  I was just too scared to notice.  And when I did, I 
became even more afraid.  It's hard needing someone the way I need you."

	"I need you too, Dana.  I need you more than I need my next breath."

	She smiled weakly at his earnest confession and closed her eyes.  "I 
wasn't half as afraid on most of the X-Files as I am of having this baby," she 
finally said.

	"The baby's going to be fine.  It's going to be healthy just like Josh 
is, Dana," he said softly but forcefully.

	"And if it isn't?"

	"Then we deal with it together."  It was his turn to make an internal 
decision.  "And we get the bastards.  No holds barred."

	She voiced the question that had haunted her for years.  "Even if it 
means losing the answer to Samantha's whereabouts?"

	His eyes clouded with pain, but he nodded.  "They can't keep getting 
away with this, Scully, and we're the only ones with any idea of what they've 
been up to for the past fifty years."  His hand covered hers as it rested on 
the child lying between them.

	She turned hers over and laced their fingers together.  "Have you 
thought about any names for the baby?"

	He shook his head and grinned.  She had avoided that particular topic 
for months.  "It's about time we did, though.  The li'l whippersnapper will be 
here before we know it."

	Her lips twitched and she closed her eyes.  "Think about it, and we'll 
shoot down your choices after you get back from the office tomorrow."

	He flopped back on the pillows and reached for the remote.  "Hey it 
wasn't my fault you didn't like Ralph or Rudolph, and that was as close as you 
were going to get to naming the kid Fox."  He turned off the TV and waited for 
her reply.

	"Yeah, naming Josh Rudolph or Ralph would have basically given the OK 
for another generation to hate his first name.  His life at Christmas would 
have been hell for Rudolph and not much better the rest of the year for 
Ralph," she argued.

	"You know, I still can't believe I gave into such a religious name," 
he said in awe.

	"There's still Gabriel and Peter and Ignatius," she offered.

	"And Bathsheba and Ruth and the ever popular Mary," he countered.  He 
smiled at the husky chuckle he heard in the darkness.

	"Go to sleep, Mulder."

	"Night, Scully," he said and moved to kiss her.

	"Goodnight," she said against his lips.

		* * end* *

End New Beginnings III -- New Fears (2/4)

From mason@umr.edu Sun Nov 10 21:57:13 1996
Let's see... We're back to the MSR part.  And again, the medical speak is as 
close as I could get it without Kia's help.  My source for small children and 
pregnancy decided to go ahead and give birth again, so if there's any 
not-quite-right statements, I tried.  April can be forgiven because I get to 
be a godmother to Ms. Cara Marie, so it balanced out a little.  I just hope 
this doesn't mean I have to change more diapers than Missy does when one of us 
ends up babysitting.

Disclaimer: I know this will never happen on the TV show.  That's what fanfic 
is all about.  It's also about not owning the characters.  That privilege goes 
to Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox.  No harm intended.  Some mild third season 
spoilers apply.  The thing was too far gone, and I thought it was almost done 
by Oct 4th, so I didn't even THINK about referring to anything in the fourth 
season.  I swear the last few scenes and any similarities to new eps are pure 
cowinkidink.

Again, if parts don't make it to your server, e-mail me.  Responding on the 
newsgroup might not make it to me for four or five days.  The whole series is 
New Beginnings.  The sections will be subtitled but should still be considered 
to be under the main title.

New Beginnings III -- New Fears (3/4)
	II -- Old Issues
	I--Something New

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	It was Saturday and no one had given him any grief about bringing the 
baby into the office.  Mainly because Josh didn't cause a fuss any other time 
Mulder would bring him to work and take him downstairs instead of to the 
daycare.  Being back in the basement kept the happy baby shrieks from 
distracting the other agents.

	Mulder set him on the floor and the little boy headed right toward the 
box full of what he considered his toys.  He watched his son for a moment and 
then he started gathering some of the files he wanted to bring home to help 
keep Scully busy.  Lisa had given the OK for her to do light work, as long as 
she stayed off of her feet for another week.  She had gained a couple of 
pounds and her blood pressure wasn't nearly as high, but the ultrasound had 
indeed shown a possible weak area where the placenta was attached as well as 
the sex of the baby.  Scully was still nervous about the possibility of early 
labor and was following orders to the letter for once, but she was also going 
stir crazy.

	So here he was, gathering things that he had wanted to ask her about 
for almost three weeks and praying it was enough to distract her from 
atrocious baby names.  He knew she was doing it on purpose, that she wanted 
him to name the baby this time.  But he didn't care what they named him.  He 
was so relieved that the baby was healthy so far that he was even willing to 
name the new kid Fox.  But there was no way he was going to tell her that.

	The phone rang and distracted him from his thoughts.  "Mulder."

	"Mulder, it's me."

	"What do you want now?"  He grinned at her snort.

	"Could you run by my office and pick up a few things?"

	"Scully, Lisa said LIGHT work."

	"I know, but I still have to finish grading the last exam.  They need 
the results before their graduations.  That's it.  I swear."

	He could see the fingers she had crossed behind her back.  "That's 
all, Scully.  I'm bringing a few files for you to look at, so you'll quit 
bugging me."

	"Oh, you want me to use my sick leave to work on your cases.  I see.  
Your performance goes through the roof, and I look like I'm slacking."

	"You have uncovered my nefarious plot.  I'm going to have to keep you 
as a prisoner now."

	"Sure.  Fine.  Whatever.  And what do you think about Cedric?"

	"The same think I thought about Bjorn.  Fine, if we were Vikings or 
lived in Iceland.  But I'm sure he would make us call him Mulder, living in 
DC."

	"Hmm.  You're right.  I'll have to think of something else.  Unless of 
course, you have an idea?"

	"I'm working on it, Scully.  I have an appointment with a psychic at 
three.  She's going to see what his name was in his previous life."

	"Don't I have to be with you to do that?"

	"Uhm... you're right."  He paused again, like he was reconsidering the 
idea.  "So you wanna go?"

	"And if she says Cephas?"

	"Well, we wouldn't want to name the kid the same thing twice."   
/Cephas?  Where the hell did that one come from?/

	"You're going to miss "Freakazoid" if you don't hurry," she warned.

	"We can't let that happen.  Tell me where you put the tests and we'll 
be home right after that."

	He hung up shortly after and picked up the protesting baby for the 
trip to the car.  Josh wasn't ready to stop investigating the monkey-mermaid 
and put up his usual stink about being pulled away from a case.

		* * * * *

	It felt weird walking down the hall toward her office.  But then 
again, it was the first time in almost a month that she had been back at work. 
And it was only going to be for a couple of hours at a time.  By her own 
choice and by doctor's orders.  There was no way she was going to let her fear 
endanger the baby again.  She would focus her denial capabilities on ignoring 
possible ill health of the baby instead of the baby itself.  Besides with the 
way the kid had grown in the past couple of weeks it was going to be 
impossible to convince anyone she wasn't pregnant.

	The first encounter proved that.  "Dana, I didn't know you were 
pregnant."  It was one of her fellow instructors and his eyes were nearly 
bugging out of his head.

	"Yes," was all she said.

	"Didn't you just have a baby?"

	Boy, sometimes her coworkers were quick.  "Our son just turned two."  
She really didn't want to speak with Dr. Harris, but she wasn't sure she could 
find a graceful way out of it.  She started walking again and he followed.

	"So you're feeling better?"

	/No subtlety at all./   "Yes, thank you, Mitch.  And how have things 
been here?"

	"I think we have another Spooky in this next batch."

	Scully raised her eyebrow and pursed her lips.  She and Mulder joking 
about his nickname was one thing.  Someone else doing it was entirely 
different.  "Really?"

	"Sorry, I forgot.  Anyway..."

	His voice droned on as they continued down the corridors and she made 
the appropriate responses at the appropriate times.  He even followed her into 
her office and sat down as she started sorting through the papers on her desk. 
Even with Mulder bringing the paperwork home every other day, the piles were 
impressive.  He finally left after an hour and she breathed a large sigh of 
relief.

	Her reprieve didn't last long.  Several other of her coworkers dropped 
by to see how she was doing and offered their congratulations and concerns.  
She responded politely but wished they would all just disappear and let her 
get some work done.  She had another hour before she was going to leave, and 
she had barely made a dent in the things she had wanted to get done today.

	She knew who was on the phone when it rang two minutes before she was 
scheduled to walk out the door.  "How about Huard?  It means mind-guardian."

	"How the hell do you spell that?"

	"What do you want, Mulder?  I'm getting ready to leave," she said 
around a grin.

	"Already?  What time is it?"

	"I've been a good girl, Mom, and haven't moved from my desk all day."

	"Ah.  That means everybody came to you to get the scoop.  Has anyone 
started calling him Spooky Junior?"

	"Not to my face," she said menacingly.

	"So... are you going to pick Josh up or do you want me to do it?"

	"You are unbelievable sometimes, Mulder."  She didn't know if she was 
angry or if she was touched by his continued concern.  "Since he's at the 
daycare over by you, you can do it, and I'll see the two of you at home."

	"I guess that wasn't too subtle."

	"Nope.  Not at all," she agreed.

	"I just worry."

	"I know.  Now I'm going to hang up.  I want to get out of the building 
before my husband sends an armed guard to make sure I get home and rest."

	"OK.  I'll be home early."

	"Mulder, you don't have to."

	"Of course I don't.  But that's one of the advantages to being the 
head of your own division.  I can tell the boss I'll finish the paperwork at 
home, and he'll believe me."

	She heard the smile in his voice, and she let a small one form.  "Bye, 
Mulder."

	"Later, Scully."

	She hung up the phone and quickly finished packing her briefcase.  She 
wouldn't put it past him to make sure she got home when she said she would.

		* * * * * 

	He felt naked as he walked from the car to the apartment a couple of 
weeks later.  He only had his briefcase and his trenchcoat to juggle instead 
of Josh and all of his paraphernalia as well.  But Josh was at his 
grandmother's for the weekend.

	The whole weekend.

	It would be just him and Scully and the apartment all to themselves.

	He smiled slightly in anticipation as he unlocked the door and stepped 
inside.

	She was in the doorway to the kitchen, wiping her hands on a 
dishcloth.  "Hi.  You're early."

	"Yeah," he agreed as he slowly approached her.

	"Where's Josh?" she asked when she didn't see or hear the baby.

	"At your mother's."

	"Why?"

	"Don't tell me you've forgotten what today is."

	"Today?" she asked against his lips as he pulled her into his arms.  
"There's nothing special about today."

	"What about tomorrow?"

	"Now tomorrow is a different story."

	"Tell me about it," he urged into her neck.

	"Later," she said as she stepped back.  "Dinner's almost ready.  I 
don't want it to burn."

	He hung his head in defeat.  "Ah.  The life of a married man.  "Later, 
dear" or  "Not tonight, dear" or "I have a headache, dear."  Is there no end 
to the excuses?"

	"How about let me turn the stove off and you can eat your words, 
dear," she suggested with a saucy grin.

	"Lisa gave the OK?"

	She turned back toward him and reached for his tie.  "Lisa gave the 
OK."

	"Finally.  What an anniversary present." 

	"You ain't seen nothing yet, Fox."

		* * * * *

	"Just in time for us to stop again," he said sadly and nuzzled his 
chin against her damp hair.

	"Mulder, you are sooooo romantic," she said and pulled his hand from 
her thigh to her lips.

	"Isn't that why you married me?"

	"You bet your spooky sense it was."

	"Yeah, well, my spooky sense is telling me that this one is going to 
be early," he said into her hair.

	"Are you saying that because Josh was on time?"

	"No.  I'm saying it because the kid knows if he's early, he's going to 
scare the shit out of his old man."

	"Let's see... He's your son, so the odds of him doing something just 
to see what kind of trouble he can cause are very high.  I'll sign us up for 
the three day Lamaze class next week."

	"No need.  I remember the last one perfectly," he said with an 
exaggerated shudder.

	"Good.  I wasn't really in the mood to go through another one either."

	She was almost asleep when he said, "Scully, what do you think about 
Nicholas?"

	"Nicholas what?"

	"Andrew."

	"It's about time, Mulder."

	"Well, you sure as hell weren't helping.  I think the worst one you 
came up with was Walter."

	"Got you to take me seriously, didn't it?"

	He just nodded and pulled her even closer.

		* * * * *

	She wasn't really surprised when she felt the first contraction a 
month early.  Between her borderline health, despite her efforts, and Mulder's 
feeling, she was more than ready for it and didn't panic at the thought.  
Calmly, she packed up her briefcase and reached for the phone.

	"Mulder."

	"Hi.  It's me."

	"What's up?"

	"I'm feeling tired, so I'm going to go on home."

	"Scully?"

	"I'm just tired.  Everything's OK," she lied.

	"OK," he said in relief.  "We'll be home around six."

	"See you then."  She said a quick prayer that the five hours until 
then didn't last an eternity.

	It wasn't too bad.  The contractions weren't as fast as they had been 
with Josh and she had plenty of time to get the house ready and call her 
doctor.  Lisa wanted her to go to the hospital sooner than the five minutes 
apart suggestion and she reluctantly agreed.  They would be better able to 
monitor the baby's condition and take faster action if something was wrong and 
she was already there.

	She was calmly pacing through the next contraction when Mulder came in 
with Josh.

	"Hi.  I thought you were going to rest," he said as he looked around 
the room.

	"I have," she lied again and greeted her son.

	Mulder watched as she sat down and Josh twisted to put his ear to her 
stomach.  "It looks like you did an overhaul in here.  You didn't do too much, 
did you?"

	Amazing what just picking up baby toys could do to a room.  "No, 
Mulder.  I didn't overexert myself."

	She eyed him as he shucked his coat and put away his gun.  Almost as 
an afterthought, he leaned down to kiss her hello and said, "How does takeout 
sound tonight?  I'm kinda restless and don't really feel like cooking or 
cleaning up afterwards."

	"Why don't you go running?"

	He thought about it but shook his head.  "Nah.  It looked like it was 
going to rain."  He headed towards the bathroom and said, "I'm going to change 
clothes.  You decide what you want to eat."

	She shrugged and waited for him to notice her bag in the bedroom.  It 
didn't take him long.

	"Scully, what is this?"

	"My bag for the hospital."

	"Why is it already packed?"

	"Because my contractions have started," she said simply.

	He took a deep breath and calmly walked to the front door with the 
bag.  Slowly he set it down and just as slowly he stood back up.  "Notice I'm 
not panicking."

	"I noticed, Mulder.  I already called Lisa.  She wants us to head 
toward the hospital when they're close to fifteen minutes apart."

	"And you're at...?"

	"Almost forty."

	He nodded once and sat down next to her.  "So are we going to order 
dinner?"

	"I'm not really hungry.  But you go ahead," she offered.

	"Should we call your mother?"

	"I think we should wait until we're on our way to the hospital.  
She'll just worry otherwise."

	"They started at work, didn't they?  That's why you left early."

	"I wonder what's on TV?" she said, hoping to change the subject.

	"Don't worry.  I'm not going to go ballistic.  I'm just asking a 
question."

	"Hmm," she said and laid her head on his shoulder.

	His hand came up and he started to stroke her hair.  "You are going to 
drive me crazy."

	She smiled as Josh became bored with the calm atmosphere and went in 
search for his toys.  "Too late, Mulder.  You're already there."

	"I have to be," he said with a nod and reached for the phone to order 
dinner.  It was going to be a long night, and he was going to need the energy.

		* * end * *

End New Beginnings III -- New Fears (3/4)

From mason@umr.edu Sun Nov 10 21:59:12 1996
Let's see... We're back to the MSR part.  And again, the medical speak is as 
close as I could get it without Kia's help.  My source for small children and 
pregnancy decided to go ahead and give birth again, so if there's any 
not-quite-right statements, I tried.  April can be forgiven because I get to 
be a godmother to Ms. Cara Marie, so it balanced out a little.  I just hope 
this doesn't mean I have to change more diapers than Missy does when one of us 
ends up babysitting.

Disclaimer: I know this will never happen on the TV show.  That's what fanfic 
is all about.  It's also about not owning the characters.  That privilege goes 
to Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox.  No harm intended.  Some mild third season 
spoilers apply.  The thing was too far gone, and I thought it was almost done 
by Oct 4th, so I didn't even THINK about referring to anything in the fourth 
season.  I swear the last few scenes and any similarities to new eps are pure 
cowinkidink.

Again, if parts don't make it to your server, e-mail me.  Responding on the 
newsgroup might not make it to me for four or five days.  The whole series is 
New Beginnings.  The sections will be subtitled but should still be considered 
to be under the main title.

New Beginnings III -- New Fears (4/4)
	II -- Old Issues
	I--Something New

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	Mulder slowly paced with her down the corridors of the hospital.  This 
was their fifth trip through the halls since they arrived and Mulder's nerves 
were frayed.  Things were progressing much too slowly, but at the same time 
too quickly, for his peace of mind.

	"How long?" she asked when it was over.

	"Nine minutes."

	"Well they're getting closer together."  But after fifteen hours, she 
was starting to lose track of her sense of timing.

	Mulder gritted his teeth as they completed their circuit and arrived 
back at her room.  They would stay in there for the next two contractions 
before she would want to walk again.  The ones in the room were worse on him 
because there was less to distract him from her pain.  He was tense and 
getting more tense by the minute.  Seeing a nurse waiting for them didn't 
help.

	"OK, Mrs. Mulder.  Let's see how you're doing."

	He ignored Scully's start of surprise and helped her up onto the bed. 
He too found it strange when someone called her that (she was Scully), but he 
smiled inwardly as they waited for the verdict.

	"Five centimeters.  You're halfway there," she said just a bit too 
cheerfully for five o'clock in the morning.

	They both smiled tightly and Scully waited until the nurse was gone 
before she said anything.

	"Shoot her the next time you see her.  Will you, Mulder?"

	"Sure.  I thought about doing it now, but decided to wait for the 
shift change.  That way no one will notice she's gone right away."

	She smiled faintly and waited for the next waves of pain to hit.  One 
of those weird time lapses occurred again where everything seemed to stand 
still and speed up all at once.  She was a little relieved when Mulder said 
that there had only been eight and a half minutes from the last contraction.  
What a difference thirty seconds made.

	Lisa came back from another delivery and checked Scully's progress.  
She smiled in relief as she told them that Scully and the baby's heartrates 
and blood pressure were OK.  Scully and Mulder shared a look that was both 
disappointed and relieved.  With everything progressing normally, and neither 
Scully or the baby under a lot of stress, that meant there wouldn't be a 
C-section in the works and they would have to wait out the stubborn pace of 
the baby.

	"This one takes after you, Scully."

	"What do you mean?" she asked warily.

	"Stubborn, methodical, making sure everything is just right, before 
going ahead with the plan that has already been proven to work."

	"Ah, you mean unlike Josh that when he decided he wanted out and had 
to get out in that instant?" she offered in understanding.

	"Exactly.  That kid knew what he wanted and went after it."

	"Catching us both off guard and almost making you faint in the 
process."

	"If I remember correctly..."  And his tone said he did.  "That was 
because of you.  Not Josh."

	"Oh, yeah," she said in acknowledgment.  "Wanna try it again?"

	His smile was wicked.  "If you're up to it.  Sure."

	She shook her head in defeat.  "Sorry.  I don't think I could 
concentrate on dirty limericks right now."

	"You're only saying that because you lost the last time."

	"I didn't consider that a loss, Mul....der."  His name was drawn out 
on another contraction.

	"Eight and a half, again," he answered without being asked.

	They both silently groaned and accepted that it was going to be a long 
day.

		* * * * *

	She was stalled at nine centimeters with two minutes between 
contractions and had been that way for the past hour.  They were way too close 
together for her to relax any and her hand hurt now from holding onto Mulder's 
so tightly.  The only upside she could find was that she wasn't have to fight 
the urge to push.  Yet.

	Her mother had brought Josh up to the hospital around ten o'clock and 
that had offered a small distraction.  But the baby had become scared when he 
had seen his mother in pain, even though she had tried to hide it, so Mulder 
had taken him to see the babies in the nursery, while Maggie walked the halls 
with her.  Mulder was back now though and Maggie had taken Josh on another 
tour of the hospital.

	She smiled weakly as Mulder gently wiped the sweat off of her face.  
"You know, this is your fault," he said softly.

	"My fault?" she joked back.  They had had this particular discussion a 
lot in the past twenty two hours.

	"Yeah.  You took advantage of me in my weakened condition.  I couldn't 
fight you off with a broken arm and broken ribs."

	"You were totally in my power."

	"You know, Skinner heard us."

	She fought a blush and lost.  She still tried to brazen it out, 
though.  "Us?  I wasn't the one that was shouting."

	"At the end there, you did," he argued.

	"Shut up, Mulder."  That probably explained why Skinner hadn't looked 
her in the eye for several hours the next day.  She had thought it was because 
of their illegal search in Barnett's house.  She lost her train of thought as 
the next contraction hit.

	"A minute forty-five."

	"Thank god."

	Mulder silently agreed.

	Another hour passed and she was wheeled into the delivery room.  
Things went very quickly from there and somehow or another at quarter after 
two Nicholas Andrew was born.  The end was really fuzzy for her, and Mulder 
couldn't give her any great insights either.

	She carefully held the baby and said a thousand "Thank you's" that he 
was OK.  "He's so small," she whispered.  Mulder nodded his agreement.

	One of the nurses piped up, "Right at five pounds."

	Scully passed the baby to Mulder and he grinned at the calm features. 
 "This one is going to take things in stride," he said.

	She smiled weakly and closed her eyes in relief.  When she opened them 
again, she was in a normal room with Mulder, Josh, and her mom talking softly 
in the corner.  "Hi," she said to gain their attention.

	Three smiles answered her.

	She looked around the room again and frowned.  "Where's Nick?"

	"In the nursery," Mulder said as he approached.

	"Oh, god, what's wrong?"

	"Nothing, Dana.  They just want to make sure his lungs are doing OK.  
May, the head nurse, said she would bring him in when you woke up."  He 
smoothed her hair back and softly kissed her.

	Josh was holding onto the side of the bed, tiptoeing to see what was 
going on.  "Momma?"

	"Hey, Munchkin, how ya doin'?"

	Mulder lifted him so he could sit next to her on the bed.  "Fine.  
Tank you," he answered, almost roguishly.

	She grinned and pulled him down so that he was snuggled up next to 
her.  "That's good to hear.  Are you being good for Grandma?"

	"Nope."

	"Well, you'll just have to stay with her until you do."

	"OK."

	"Just like your Daddy," she said and rubbed her nose against his.

	"Tub-urn Momma?"

	It was Mulder that answered him.  "Yes, Momma is stubborn."

	She raised her eyebrow but otherwise ignored him and continued to talk 
with her son.  Mulder grinned in triumph and then left to go get the baby.  He 
wanted to grab him and hold him close, but he let the nurse lead the way back 
to Scully's room.  Once there, he didn't waste any time in picking him up.

	Nick was so tiny.  He was only two and a half pounds lighter than Josh 
had been, but it seemed to make all the difference in the world.  Mulder knew 
it was going to be hard not to overprotect this child, and he could see the 
same emotions in Scully's eyes.  He passed her the baby so she could see for 
herself that he was alright.

	Josh watched the inspection of fingers and toes with a large amount of 
curiosity.  He even helped with the counting and declared his conclusions on 
his findings.  "Baby."

	"Yes.  This is Nicholas, your brother," Scully said to introduce the 
two.

	Josh held out his arms and said, "Boo-boo?"

	Mulder sat down near her hip and pulled Josh onto his lap.  As he 
extended his hands, he said, "Brother."

	"Bru-der," he repeated as his mother moved to set the baby in his 
father's and his arms.  He stared in awe at the tiny creature.  "Baby."  The 
little thing started squirming lightly in the hands that held him.  "Hun-gy," 
Josh said.

	"Grandma can take you to get some food, guy," Mulder said softly.

	"Not me.  Baby hun-gy."

	At the second pronouncement, the baby opened his mouth and started 
making frustrated sounds.  The little fist batted at the air and Mulder looked 
at Scully.  She reached for the baby again and brought him close to her chest. 
His head turned immediately into the soft haven and she felt an instinctive 
tingle start in her breasts.  Adjusting her hospital gown, she led his mouth 
to her nipple, teaching him what he needed to learn.

	Mulder swallowed around the lump in his throat and hugged Josh close 
for a second before setting him down on the floor.  His eyes followed as the 
little boy rounded the bed and went to stand by his grandmother.

	Mrs. Scully picked him up and said, "Let's go see what we can find to 
eat."  Josh nodded and she bent to kiss her daughter's cheek.  "We'll be back 
in awhile, Dana."

	She smiled and reached up to touch Josh's cheek with her free hand.  
"See you in a little bit, Munchkin."

	"OK, Momma.  Bye, Dadda," he said and waved from his perch.

	"Later, kiddo."

	They were silent for a few moments and just watched the baby as he 
suckled, urging her milk to come.  She moved him to her other breast after 
awhile and said, "He's really OK."

	"Yeah.  Lisa had the head pediatrician check him out thoroughly while 
you were sleeping.  Except for being a tad on the small side, he's fine."  The 
sucking slowed and eventually trailed off as the baby's mouth went slack.  He 
held the baby while she readjusted the gown and placed a gentle kiss on his 
head.

	"His weight is probably going to drop and we won't be able to take him 
home tomorrow," she said.

	"Hmm?"

	"They'll want to keep him here until his weight is above five pounds."

	"Well then maybe you should feed him again," he suggested as he placed 
the baby in the nursery cradle.

	"If he's like Josh at all, that will be in about two hours," she said 
in remembrance.

	"Dana, you're OK, aren't you?  I mean no more guilt?"

	She laughed softly, without any humor.  "I've been with you too long, 
Mulder.  I'll probably still be feeling some remnants of this until he's old 
enough to have grandkids."

	"Grandkids?"  He gave an exaggerated, horrified shutter which prompted 
another soft smile.  "So you're going to stay home a year or two with this 
one?"

	She shook her head.  "Not that long, Mulder.  But I probably will take 
a longer maternity leave."

	He was quiet for a moment.  "How long?"  He tried to hide how much he 
was worrying about her, but he must have failed.

	"Don't worry.  I'm not going to get obsessive about the baby.  No more 
than three months."

	He grinned in relief.  "Whatever suits you."

	"You know, I really love it when you get all mushy like that."

	He snorted in disbelief.  "I believe that one, Scully.  You hate the 
mere thought of me worrying about you in any way."

	"Yeah, but you do it anyway.  Just to tick me off."

	"I do it because you're beautiful when you're angry."

	"You better be glad I'm too tired to hurt you for thinking that, let 
alone saying it."

	"I will be forever grateful," he said and leaned in to kiss her.

	A discrete cough from the doorway prevented them from deepening the 
kiss.  Mulder leaned his forehead against hers and whispered, "Please tell me 
that isn't Skinner."

	"I could never keep the truth from you, Mulder."

	He groaned as he pulled back and turned to greet his boss.  "Who told 
you?"

	Skinner shook his head but kept his smile to himself.  "I didn't 
become AD based on my looks alone, Mulder."

	"Hell, if that were the case, you would be in the basement with me."

	The big man shuddered.  "A fate worse than death."

	"An honor you can never hope to achieve."

	"A horror so unspeakable --"  Scully's laughter stopped him and he let 
a small smile be seen.  "How are you, Dana?"

	She was more relaxed than she had been in a very long time.  "Fine, 
sir.  We're both fine."

	"Good.  Does that mean I can send Mulder on a case again without 
having to worry he'll be called back before he even lands?"

	"Indeed it does.  And now would be a good time, I think.  I've been 
seeing way too much of him recently and he's getting on my nerves."

	Mulder glared at the two of them and stood up.  "I'll leave so you can 
talk about me behind my back," he offered with his hang-dog expression.

	"Bye, Mulder.  See you later," she said with a wave.

	He had backed himself into a corner with that one, so he went ahead 
and left the room.  He grinned as he heard Scully's husky chuckle.  Walking to 
the window at the end of the hall, he took several deep breaths and said a 
small thank you to whomever might be listening.

		* * end * *

End New Beginnings III -- New Fears (4/4)