From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org
Date: Tue, 16 May 2000 14:34:58 -0500
Subject: Of All the Stars In Heaven by Alexis Stephens
Source: direct

Reply To: alexis_stephens@hotmail.com


WARNING: This story is based on the very few spoilers I've
read for 'Requiem' and is therefore probably based on
nothing more than vapor.  However, if you've remained
spoiler-free, you might want to wait on this one until after
the episode airs.




Title: Of All the Stars in Heaven
Author: Alexis Stephens
E-mail: alexis_stephens@hotmail.com
Rating: G
Summary:  Pondering life and destiny and the night sky
Archive: Sure

*****


Of All the Stars in Heaven
by Alexis Stephens


We've waited so long.

All the years I've loved you, all the times I've been afraid
to speak...all the hugs, drawn back from just in the nick of
time.  The caresses, never allowed to linger for too long.
The quick kisses, chaste, sisterly, holding back the passion
that I've denied even to myself, even to this day.

No more.

Tonight is just the same as last night and the night before
and a thousand and one nights before that, but tonight it
all has changed.  Tonight you walked away, brave, strong,
determined to do what was right at any cost.

And the cost was so high.

Why are we the ones who have to sacrifice it all?  Who
touched us, fingered us, marked us with the mark of Cain,
sending us into an eternity of hell over which we had no
control and no choice?  Like One before us, I plead for the
cup to be taken away, but not you--you stand there like a
knight, a soldier, a warrior, a god, and I know that all my
pleading will fall on deaf ears.  God's ears and yours are
closed to my cries for mercy now.

Those who loved the Savior shed tears at His demise,
watching His suffering, knowing He sacrificed for them, and
I watch you now with the same desolation mixed with fierce
pride.  I know you must do what you must do, but how I wish
we could have lived our lives anonymously, never touching
conspiracies or secrets or lies.  Were you sent specifically
at this time, for this purpose, or was it simply an accident
of birth and nothing more?

No matter now.  What's done is done, and all I can do is
wish upon all the stars in heaven that you will return to me
one day, safe and sound and whole and loving me as you have
always loved me.  Pray God I will have the courage to wait,
and be strong and constant.  People cast wishes upon multitudes
of stars every night, and some come true and some can never be
realized, and I would give the rest of my life to know--

Of all the stars in heaven, which star belongs to us?

And how long can it burn?

*****