Date: Thu, 09 Oct 1997 09:28:40 -0400 From: Technogirl Subject: **NEW** One Sweet Day 1/2 by Technogirl Title: One Sweet Day Author: Technogirl E-Mail: janflynn@mail.snip.net Spoiler Warning: Anasazi, Memento Mori, Gethsemane Rating: PG Content Warning: Romance M&S. Classification: SRA(Story/Romance/Angst/) Summary: Scully grieves over Mulder's death, and tries to imagine life without him when she gets an unexpected visitor.... Disclaimer: As always, I don't own them. The creative Chris Carter does. Also, the song "One Sweet Day" belongs to Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men so I don't own that either. Any comments can be sent to me at janflynn@mail.snip.net Thanks and enjoy!! *G* XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx One Sweet Day Fox Mulder's Apartment 3:30 P.M. Tears threatened as she stood outside the door. What was she doing? Why was she back here? * Because I need to feel him. I need to be close to him * She unlocked the door and stepped inside the room closing the door behind her. She took off her coat and put it and her purse on the couch. * HIS * couch. The couch where he had spent so many sleepless and restless nights fighting with the demons that had plagued his dreams. But no more. He wouldn't have to fight off the demons anymore. She slowly walked around the room, looking at everything as if it was her first visit to his apartment. She took in everything, engraving it into her memory. His couch, the coffee table, books, his computer, his fish, magazines, videos.... she smiled as she remembered how he had some in his desk drawer in his office. * Whatever tape you found in the VCR isn't mine. Good because I put it back in that drawer- with all those other videos that aren't yours. * She continued to look around the room finally resting her eyes on his desk by the window. On the desk, sat a role of masking tape which Mulder had used to get in touch with his contacts. The woman shivered as she remembered how a bullet had grazed her head, embedding itself in the wall while she was looking for clues to find out where Mulder was when he had ditched her once. The silence was beginning to get to her, so she went to his stereo and turned it on. As she moved away from it, she heard the first strains of a song. Sorry I never told you All I wanted to say Now it's too late to hold you 'Cause you've flown away So far away * Maybe the silence would have been better * she thought to herself. As tears threatened once again, she moved to the couch and lowered herself onto it. Never had I imagined Living without your smile Feeling and knowing you hear me It keeps me alive Alive She put her head in her hands and started thinking. "They gave me this disease to make you believe." * GOD HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO INSENSITIVE? If only I could tell him I was sorry. Sorry for hurting him. But I can't because he's not here anymore. He killed himself. No....... I killed him. I killed him. * And I know you're shining down on me from heaven Like so many friends we've lost along the way And I know eventually we'll be together One sweet day "Oh Mulder. I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. If only you were here now so I could tell you. So many things were left unsaid." She emitted a sob and blinked rapidly to keep the tears from falling, but to no avail, the tears slowly made their way down her cheeks. Darling I never showed you Assumed you'd always be there Took your presence for granted But I always cared And I miss the love we shared As the song played on, the woman's tears fell faster and the sobs racked their way through her body. She took her gun out of her hip holster and released the safety. Through her blurred vision, she looked at the gun. * Was it easy for you Mulder? Was it easy for you to sit here with a gun to your head and pull the trigger? Did you even think about the people you would hurt with your....with your......death* She still got choked up when she thought about it. * How did you do it ? Like this....* she put the gun to her head and closed her eyes. * Now I know how easy it was for you. You had a lot of guts Mulder, but I don't have near as many. I can't pull the trigger to kill myself. Yet I can't live without you. * And I know you're shining down on me from heaven Like so many friends we've lost along the way And I know eventually we'll be together One sweet day The woman raised her head to the ceiling, her auburn hair catching the sunlight that streamed through the window. "I can't do it Mulder. I can't live without you. DO YOU HEAR ME?? I CAN'T DO IT!!!" The words echoed throughout the empty apartment. She laid the gun on the table in front of her, and turned away, disgusted at the sight of it. She put her head back in her hands as her sobs and tears continued. After what seemed like hours, her sobs subsided, but her tears were relentless. Although the sun will shine the same I'll always look to a brighter day Lord knows when I lay me down to sleep You will always listen as I pray * Why am I crying like this? I didn't even cry this much when Ahab or Missy died. * She stifled a gasp when she realized the reason. * Because when they died, I had Mulder. He was there for me and with him I could get through anything. Now he's gone and....and I'm alone. I'm all alone. * And I know you're shining down on me from heaven Like so many friends we've lost along the way And I know eventually we'll be together One sweet day The woman laid back on the couch, turning on her side and curled up into a fetal position. Her tears were still flowing freely down her face as she drifted off to sleep. The last things that Dana Scully remembered as she drifted off to sleep on Fox Mulder's couch were the last strains of the song and the feeling of guilt. And I know you're shining down on me from heaven Like so many friends we've lost along the way And I know eventually we'll be together One sweet day Sorry I never told you All I wanted to say..... XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx 5:02 P.M. The man entered the apartment, knowing he'd find her there. He walked over to where she was laying on the couch and sat down on the edge of the coffee table closest to her head. He looked at her and etched the sight of her sleeping in his memory. He closed his eyes and tried to picture her. He smiled as he saw that the picture of her was permanently imprinted in his memory: how the light played on her auburn hair, how her full, red lips were slightly parted as she breathed in and out, and how her long, dark eyelashes contrasted against her pale face. He stopped smiling when he saw something he didn't expect. He opened his eyes and looked at her face and he saw them. It was faint, but he could still see tracks that tears had left along her face and when he reached over and touched one of the tracks on her cheek, he found that her cheek was still damp. He pulled his hand back and noticed for the first time since he had walked in, that the radio was on. He walked over to it, turned it off, and went back to sit on the coffee table. As he watched her, he started thinking, but he was pulled out of his thought-pattern when he heard her first anguished sob. He reached over to wake her up. "Scully? Scully wake up." She didn't wake up so he rubbed her cheek with his thumb. "Come on Scully, wake up." Still she didn't wake up and he saw tears start to fall from her tightly closed eyelids. He sat next to her on the couch and pulled her to him so her head was on his chest. "Mulder.....Mulder please don't go. I'm sorry Mulder, I didn't mean to say it, please don't leave...." The man stroked her hair and pulled her even closer as she talked in her sleep. "Shhh. It's all right Scully. I'm not going anywhere, I'm right here.....Shhh....Shhh" He continued to stroke her hair and whisper to her. He kissed the top of her head, then rested his head on hers quickly falling asleep. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx Continued in Part 2 XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx 6:43 P.M. It was night when Scully slowly opened her eyes and she realized that something under her head was rising and falling. Without moving her head, she looked down to see two strong arms wrapped lightly around her waist. " What the...." she stopped when she realized that the person holding her was asleep and she spotted her gun on the coffee table. * If only I could just....* Scully decided that the only way that she would be able to get her gun, was to break out of the arms that surrounded her. Suddenly, the person holding her, shifted on the couch consequently loosening his grip on her waist. Scully broke free of the arms circling her, grabbed her gun and turned around. She saw someone sitting on the couch, but his face was hidden in shadow. "Who are you?" she demanded, but the figure remained silent. She was about to ask again, when the figure stood. He started walking towards her but she wasn't having any of that. He was going to stay right where he was. "Stop right there. Now, I'm gonna ask you for the last time, WHO ARE YOU?" Scully watched as the figure retreated towards the door and she thought he was leaving when suddenly, he flicked the light switch on, bathing everything in light. The light hurt Scully's eyes and she shielded them, blinking rapidly waiting for them to adjust to the light. When she was able to see again, she raised her eyes to the figure who, by now was only a few feet away from her. She gasped and dropped her gun, bringing both hands to cover her mouth. The man took a step forward and realizing that he might be the bounty hunter, Scully quickly swooped down and grabbed her gun aiming at him once more. "Scully, what are you doing? It's me Mulder." "How do I know it's really you and not that bounty hunter?" " Well, let's see. There's nobody down in the basement but the FBI's most unwanted, I still can't explain the scientific nature of the whammy to you, I'm still amazed that you ran that stop sign and I forgot to ask you how you liked Superstars of the Superbowl, but of course, I'm no Eddie Van Blundht am I?" Scully lowered her gun and Mulder stepped towards her. "Mulder?" "It's really me Scully. It's OK." Mulder stepped up to her, took her gun and placed it back on the coffee table. He turned back to her and she reached up to touch his cheek. "It really is you." Then suddenly, she pulled her hand back and slapped him across the face. "Scully, what the-" "Don't speak to me you INSENSITIVE JERK! How could you do that to everyone? Do you realize what you did to everyone who loves you, especially me?" Mulder shook his head while holding his cheek where she'd slapped him. "No! Well let me tell you Mulder. Your mother's in a state of shock, my mother feels like she's lost a son because that's how she thought of you, and less than 4 hours ago, I sat on your couch with my gun to my head trying to work up enough guts to pull the trigger because I kept telling myself that I killed you!" Scully turned around before he could see the tears that had started to gather. She started shaking violently and she hugged herself to try and stop the shaking. "Scully, you're shaking." She didn't say anything and he went to stand behind her. "Scully I'm sorry. I never meant to put anyone through this, especially you. I only did it because I hoped that if CancerMan thought I was dead, then maybe he would give you a cure.....for your cancer." Scully whirled around to face him. "It worked, didn't it Scully? You don't have the cancer anymore, do you?" Scully dropped her head, shaking it. "No I don't. I.....I just found out today." "Scully....why would you think that you killed me?" She raised her head and Mulder saw her anger had vanished but sadness now replaced it. "Because of what I said to you in the warehouse. I'm sorry Mulder. It wasn't your fault and I don't blame you at all....." Suddenly Scully launched herself at Mulder, throwing her arms around his waist and hugging him fiercely. Her action caught Mulder off guard, and it took him a few seconds before he hugged her back with just as much force. "Geez. First you slap me, then you hug me. You never fail to amaze me Scully." Scully looked up at him and smiled. "Yeah well YOU never fail to amaze ME either Mulder. Especially with your disappearing acts but I guess we're even now huh?" Mulder thought about it for a minute and he smiled down at her. "Almost Scully....." He leaned down and gently touched his lips to hers. The kiss was soft, and undemanding and he felt her respond almost immediately. His hands sought out and found her hair and he ran his fingers through the silky strands while she ran her hands up and down his back. After a few minutes, they broke off the kiss, looking into each other's eyes for signs of regret. Finding none, they both kissed again before Mulder pulled away. "That was for the slap. NOW we're even!" "Hmm. I'd have slapped you more often if I had known the consequences!" Mulder laughed but then remembered something that Scully had said earlier that had unnerved him. "Scully, did you really try to kill yourself earlier?" Scully nodded and laid her head on his chest. "But why?" "Because I....I couldn't live without you and I couldn't live with myself knowing that the last thing I had said to you may have caused your death. Whenever something happened to me, you were always there for me and all of a sudden I found myself alone." Scully raised her head and looked at Mulder. "I couldn't do it Mulder. I couldn't pull the trigger but I couldn't think of living without you." He saw that her eyes were filled with tears and he embraced her tightly. "Oh Scully, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I made you think I was dead. I should have told you but I wanted to make sure that you were cured. Don't ever think of killing yourself over me again. I'm not worth it Scully believe me, I-" "Yes you are Mulder. You're worth it to me. Please don't think you're not. I love you so much....Please...." She looked up at him and her tears were flowing freely now, but they weren't tears of grief or pain. They were tears of joy, love, and compassion for the man standing before her. "I love you too Scully. You'll never know how much. I promise I'll never leave you again, and you'll never be alone. I'll always be here for you." "I'm glad Mulder." Mulder chuckled. "And can you believe that when we first started working together I thought that you had been sent to spy on me?" Scully pulled out of his embrace and turned around, bowing her head. "What...what's wrong? Scully, tell me. What is it?" "I....I can't Mulder. You'll hate me if I tell you." "Scully, I could never hate you. Please tell me." He took hold of her shoulders and turned her around to face him. She sighed and raised her head, looking straight into his eyes. He released her shoulders and she sidestepped him, going over to sit on the couch. Mulder stood there looking at her but all of a sudden, she found her hands very interesting and wouldn't meet his eyes. He knew that this must be hard for her and he could almost see her trying to get all of her thoughts together. "I told them everything." she whispered. He walked over and sat down next to her. "What did you say?" "I said I told them everything Mulder." This time she said it in a louder voice, and she knew that he was waiting for her to clarify things. "I...I told *THEM* about your work, about your theories, our different cases, about everything. I wouldn't have told them, but I thought you were dead." She put her head in her hands. "I'm sorry Mulder." Mulder put his arm around Scully's shoulder's. "I don't care Scully." Mulder watched as Scully's head shot up and she looked at him, her blue eyes questioning. "Mulder, did you hear what I said? I said that I told them all about your work, your theories, about your-" "Scully, I heard what you said, and I said I didn't care." Mulder put his hand up as Scully went to interrupt him. "Scully I realized that I was searching too hard for Samantha and the truth. If I want to find the answers, I have to stop searching so hard. I know I'll find the answers one day and as long as I'm with you, I can wait forever." Mulder watched with amusement as Scully's mouth dropped open. He closed her mouth with his fingers, and his lips descended onto hers. Mulder pulled back and looked at her. "Mulder. I can't believe you just said that! Are you sure? I mean about finding Samantha and all?" "I'm sure Scully. I want to spend he rest of my life with you." He smiled at her and noticed how her eyes were twinkling. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you too Mulder. I wouldn't want it any other way." She snuggled up to him and put her arms around his waist. "Thank you Mulder." "What for Scully?" "For everything. For being there for me, for caring, for believing in me, and most of all, for loving me." "Anytime Scully. Just remember that." He kissed her forehead, and rested his head on hers. As Scully drifted off to sleep, she realized that her one sweet day had come and that there would be many more to look forward to. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx Authors Note: Before anyone asks, I KNOW that I didn't say who was on Mulder's floor or where Mulder had been. So for the sake of M&S romance, just go along with it OK? *G* -- Sheena Flynn janflynn@mail.snip.net http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Meadows/7377/welcome.html Favorite Sayings from: ****** Happy Days ****** ~*~* Fonzie: "Alright. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, hey. Where's Thursday? Oh yeah, today's Thursday." (Takes out Thursday from back pocket) "Hey Thursday!" ~*~* Howard: "Richard, I want you to go to the field...." Richard: "Uh-huh." Howard: "And sit on it!" ****** I Love Lucy ****** ~*~* Lucy: "Do you pop out at parties? Are you unpoopular?" ****** The X-Files ****** ~*~* Mulder: "Nobody down here but the FBI's most unwanted!" ~*~* Scully: "I'm not going to ask if you just said what I think you just said because I know it's what you just said."