From: Jacinta Cross Date: Tue, 23 Apr 2002 8:12:12 +0100 Subject: Perplexity (submission) Source: direct Title- Perplexity (sequel to "Teach me something I want to learn") Author- Jaci C. Email Adress- jacinta.cross@start.com.au Rating- About PG-13 Classification- SA- Story/Angst Spoilers- None Keywords- Mulder/Scully friendship, Scully/Other friendship Summary- Sequel to Teach me something I want to learn. Tori is faced with a new dilemma the results in her finding out the truth about her father, and why she felt she was missing something. Mulder and Scully admit their undying love for each other! :D Disclaimer- Mulder, Scully and any other x-files characters that may have slipped in aren't mine. I forgot to mention in "teach me something I want to learn" that Tori belongs to me, and that the lyrics from the songs belong to their respective artists. Feedback- Very good things come from feedback, and I love it, treasure it and NEED IT so please help me out here people :) I gasp. Everything is sucked out of me as I fall to the ground. I am so wretched; my hair is drenched from the rain and is over my face; my skin is cut; blood covers my body; I am barely breathing; my face is the color of freshly fallen snow. I tried to hard and they took advantage. The men- them- with silver tattoos on their foreheads were our demons. Now they're everyone's. Dana and I are tuned and we were trying to fight them. It's not possible; they weren't real. But now they are; I can feel it. I screwed up. I should fight them but I'm broken. Dana is running towards me, but all I see is the devastation I will cause. All I feel is the pain of others. All I sense are the lives I have destroyed. 'Tori!' Dana shouts as soon as she's in earshot. I wait until she comes over. 'I'm so sorry.' I whisper. The life has been sucked out of me. The sparkle from my eyes has gone. Everything is so wrong. 'I- I unleashed them. They're real.' I pause, letting my words sink in. 'They're no longer in our heads. We can't fight them.' There's a long pause, and then Dana speaks words with hesitation. 'No, Tori, no. We can fight them; you know we can. You have to believe. I know you can do that.' Dana has knelt down beside me; I am now sitting up. Her voice matches mine, a whisper. But hers is stronger; hers has hope. 'It's all my fault.' I whisper. 'No, it's not. You can't blame yourself for this. If not you, then somebody else. There was nothing anyone could do to stop it. It was inevitable. Damn it Tori, you have to understand that.' I look up at her. She just won't give in. All I can do is bite my lip and nod. That's all that was needed. ~ 'Yeah, love you too. Night dad.' 'Night Ash.' Dad replies as he leaves my room and softly shuts the door. I pull my covers further around me and roll over. As you may have already gathered, I'm Ash. I'm turned eight last month. Dad and I live alone. My mother died soon after I was born. I never knew her. I have one photo of her... I look at it when I'm alone. Sometimes this... emptiness comes over me. I miss what I never had, what could have been. Mum, Dad and I, together, happy. But even that seems like there's something missing. I don't know. Now is one of those times. I feel alone, even though dad is in the room next to me. I open my eyes to look at my mother's photo. I'm somewhere far away when suddenly the music comes again... ~I'm so lonely I don't even want to be with myself anymore~ I feel that way sometimes. But it's not true; I have dad. We're happy. There won't ever be anymore. I snap myself out of my dreams, and look out my window. I love looking at the stars. Dad gave me a telescope for my birthday and ever since I've been looking at the sky at night. There was nothing to see tonight; the sky was clouded over. Now, however, as I look out I am surprised to discover a bright light shining through- no, in front of- the cloud. I pull myself from my bed and walk over to the window. It's there, and it seems to be getting brighter. I have absolutely no idea what it is. I make my way over to my telescope and focus it. What I see scares me more than anything has ever scared me before. There is a dark figure in the light. I can sense evil everywhere. This is what I meant when I said that I'm not scared of the darkness, I'm scared of the things in it. I pull the blinds shut, climb back into bed and pull the blankets around me tighter than ever as though they alone will protect me from whatever evil lies out there. I can't help stealing a glance at the window. It's bright, as though the sun is shining through the blinds. But it's not. The fast approaching light out there is completely unnatural. I should run for help, call, scream, get out of here... but I can't. I'm frozen. My whole body is useless. Everything moves in slow motion from here on in. The glass breaks, the figure has smashed through. My blinds and window are shattered on the floor along with any strength or courage I ever had. I can feel a great evil descending upon me... like it's entering my soul. I was rendered useless from the moment I saw the light. My whole body, all of me; my soul, is being taken. Dad, help me... I only wanted to be happy. I never wanted this. We don't deserve this... there's nothing we can do. No, this cannot be. But... it is. I am engulfed in a darkness so cold and hopeless it feels like it has the power to destroy our world. ~ I awake from sleep as though I've been pulled out of water; I take a breath quickly and thrust my eyes open. I don't know what time it is; it must be about 2am. I've been staying with Dana for 21 days now. Mulder comes over often and the three of us are pretty close now. But I can't stay here forever. We all know that. Dana and Mulder have to work some of the time but Skinner's going a little easy on them. I've met Skinner too. Dana and Mulder have a lot of respect for him, as I do. He's a good man. We've been trying to figure out how to stop these demons... and I was so sure. The three of us went to a field- it made a good battleground, as all we had to do was summon them- and fought. I thought we could do it. I poured all my strength into fighting leaving me weak, and they escaped. With a great flash of light that gave me several injuries I watched them escape. Then Dana came running over. After the event Mulder carried me to her car and Dana took me back to her apartment. Mulder came too. Dana patched me up, Mulder talked and then I just cried. And they held me. The next few days were hard. Dana tried to make me rest, but there were always images in my head- visions of them growing stronger. Like the nights before, I could barely sleep last night. When I did, I saw the worst thing yet. A young boy was taken over... by the leader of them all. That was breaking point. As soon as my brain registered what happened I was thrust awake. I force myself out of bed; I'm still exhausted. I pull my hair out of my face and head for Dana's room. I'm a little ashamed at waking her but I can't take it anymore. But before I reach her bedroom I notice a light on in the kitchen. Dana's up too. 'Tori.' She says. 'Morning.' There's sarcasm in her voice. I manage a weak smile and walk over. 'Couldn't sleep?' She asks. I shake my head. There's a pause. 'You okay?' She asks as she puts an arm around my shoulder. 'Yeah, yeah I'm fine. I've never been better. Dana, you know, we have to go. Soon. Now would be preferable except I don't know where we're going.' 'Tori...' 'I'm going to find out.' I didn't have to read her for that one. I take a seat and send out messages to try and find out where they are. An old warehouse. They have a hideout in an old warehouse south of here. It's definitely not very original. I give Dana the address. 'I could give you directions-' I begin, but Dana cuts me off. 'Tori, don't read anymore. You're exhausted. I'll find the way there.' I nod slowly. 'Dana... we have to go now. I... had another vision. The worst one yet. The head demon... the head demon took over a little boy's body. If we don't find him soon it'll be too late.' She nods and says 'I'll go get dressed.' I'm dressed already but I go to tie my hair back. Maybe I should get it cut off- it's so annoying. Then I think the better of it when I remember how much my father used to love my hair. It's in a high ponytail now and I walk out to meet Dana at the door. She's on the phone with Mulder. '...meet us there?' 'No, this is something we have to do. There's never been so much at stake Mulder.' 'Yeah, okay. Just be there.' 'Sure.' She listens to the last words he says and then hangs up. 'Let's go. Mulder's going to meet us there.' ~ I'm so worried about her. She's young, vulnerable. We need to defeat these demons but I don't want her to get hurt anymore than she already is. I glance across at her. She's staring ahead with a lost look in her eyes. I can see anger in her. She knows what she has to do and nothing is going to stop her. I take out a map and find the way there. Thirty minutes later we pull up outside an ordinary looking abandoned warehouse. It's about ten seconds before Mulder pulls up behind us. We exit our cars and stand in a semi circle facing the building. There's silence and then quietly Mulder says, 'I guess we go in.' I am about to agree when Tori says, 'No, they're behind it. He's... collecting power.' With that she begins to walk around the side of the building. Mulder and I draw our weapons and follow. She senses us and doesn't turn around but says, 'You won't need those; you'll just cause more harm.' She keeps walking and comes to a halt at the edge of the building, peering around the corner. She looks, turns slightly pale and backs away. 'What is it?' I whisper, coming up to comfort her and peer around the corner myself. What I see is devastating. There is a boy of about eight... but his eyes are red and he seems to be... emitting a dark, evil glow. This must be what Tori told me about. Mulder is standing perplexed beside me. 'Tori told me she saw a boy... he was taken over by the head demon. I don't know what we can do.' I whisper to him, but Tori, of course knows what I'm saying. 'I do. Stay here, and call for back up. This is the being responsible for everything I've been seeing.' She says. There is an alarming authority in her voice that prevents us from arguing. We don't really know what else to do but obey. 'Be careful.' Mulder says. I just stand there. ~ I glance behind me one more time; Mulder and Dana are holding each other. There's no turning back; this is something I have to do. I walk over and call the demon to face me. 'Elexir!' I read his name. It's painfully similar to the word elixir, a substance believed to cure all ills. He is far from that. 'I am here to destroy you. You cannot prevail for I bring the power of this world and you are not of it. I banish you Elexir, to a place where you cannot exist. You will be nothing.' I say to him, and my voice is icy cold and calm when I thought it would be screaming. My words came from nowhere and filled me with strength. I descend upon him, tearing him apart. My soul rips his. But something's not right. I feel a cold darkness come over me. I hear Dana scream my name, and suddenly she's beside me. We cower beneath him, the cause of our pain. I believe it is all going to end. The worse will happen. But Dana saves me, with one simple word. 'No.' She's right. It can't end like this, it was never meant to be. Somehow I find the strength to pull my soul from my body to fight his. He leaves the body of the boy and matches me, floating. 'By the power of the earth, the fire, the wind, the rain and the blood of the people, I banish you!' I feel a strange yet incredible power surge through me and I realize I have Dana and Mulder's strength as well. The force leaves me, and although I am left with no strength, it works against him. I watch in wonder and satisfaction as he feels the pain that he caused. He is destroyed, leaving me to reenter my body and find myself beside Dana. Mulder is here now too. 'Don't help us; help him.' I say, referring to the boy, who is lying on the ground holding onto life by a thread. I know Dana and I are fine. Suddenly I read a piece of information that shocks me and yet makes me feel complete. I look at the boy. He has my black hair, and I'm sure his eyes are green. 'Take good care of him... he's my brother.' I tell Mulder weakly before passing out. ~ I watch Tori as she walks off towards the demon. I take Scully into my arms for both our comfort. Tori looks back one last time before making her final decision and proceeding. She approaches the demon and yells something that seems to be in another language. We watch in wonder as she coldly delivers words that mean nothing to us, but make perfect sense to her. She wildly attacks the demon, willing it to die. It seems to be working- but then she realizes something isn't right at the same time Scully does. In a second Scully's beside her, holding her hand. At this point I know there's nothing more I can do so I call for help. When Tori said backup she didn't mean a squat team, she meant ambulances. There's nothing else that can stop this other than her, and she intends to stop them. It's inevitable that she's going to take some damage. I watch in horror as the woman I love most and a friend who has been like a daughter to me cower in horror beneath the cause of their pain. There's nothing I can do. Then Scully whispers a word to Tori that has an immediate effect. It gives them both hope and lets me know how I can help. Tori needs our strength, and with that, she's going to fight and win. Tori yells more words that I can't understand, but she has so much more hope this time. I watch in amazement as a power surges through her. It helps her before leaving her soul, but when it reaches the demon's it causes it excruciating pain. The demon is destroyed. I am drained but I run over to them. I lean of Tori and Dana when Tori mutters 'Don't help us; help him.' Referring to the young boy lying several feet away. I get up immediately and go over to him when I hear Tori say, 'Take good care of him; he's my brother.' She passes out but I know she's going to be fine. So is Dana. I hear approaching sirens in the background as I tend to the boy. With a sister like that, he's going to be fine too. ~ I guess I can see a pattern emerging here. But the best thing is, it feels so right. I was admitted to hospital overnight for observation. They checked Mulder out and gave him the okay, Tori's going to be in there for a bit longer, and as for Ash, he's lucky to be alive. We were as pleasantly surprised as Tori to discover that she has a brother, and that her dad is still alive. Tori met her dad for the first time and talked with him for hours. Then he left, promising to visit her again as soon as he could. He was going to see Ash. Ash and Tori are on different wards so they haven't met yet, but I'm going to arrange with the hospital staff to help her do that. I want the best for her... she certainly deserves it. She's not going to live with me anymore; it only ever was a temporary arrangement. It's won't be hard saying goodbye because we've arranged to see each other often. I'm so happy for Tori. She says she feels complete now, and as for Mulder and I... well... The door of my apartment silently opens, and I need not guess who it is. He comes up behind me and starts gently massaging my shoulders. 'Scully, how about... dinner, tonight?' He asks. 'I'd love to, Mulder.' I say, with a smile. I love it when he makes me smile. I turn around before taking him into my arms. 'Mulder, I...' I pause. I've wanted to say this to him for six years. I can't wait any longer, not after everything that's happened. Not after knowing that we may die tomorrow. 'I love you.' I say those three, simple words, and yet I am scared. Scared that he won't feel the same way. 'Dana, I love you too. Always forever.' I can't tell you how much I wanted to hear that. I know it's true. I hold him tighter, and then he pulls me back. For a moment I stare into his beautiful hazel eyes, and then our lips meet. His body sends a sense of electricity through me. This is what we've wanted for years, and now that we have it, we're not going to let it go. ~ One of the nurses helped me to Ash's ward so I could see him. I talked to my father; I think I'm going to be happy. I feel fulfilled at last, the emptiness that has hung over me for long has finally lifted. I have a little brother! I... this sounds crazy but I've always wanted one. I knew... I knew I had one. Well, I supposed I would have some idea; I'm psychic. There's so much about Ash I don't know, maybe he's psychic too. I enter his room and take a seat on a chair next to his bed. He's not conscious, and there are several tubes in him. I watch over him, he looks so much like me. We inherited our father's black hair and our mother's green eyes. Talking to my father, I found that he's not psychic. I know my mother was. I try and read Ash and find I can pick up a few things. He has happy memories, but he too also felt like he was missing something, until now. I smile. I love my brother. I take hold of his hand gently, and after I've held him for a while he stirs. He's waking up. 'Tori?' He asks. He sounds groggy and confused. 'I'm here Ash, I'm here. They're not going to hurt us anymore.' He smiles and holds my hand tighter. I hear someone's footsteps entering the room and sense who they belong to. 'Tori, sweetheart.' Dad says. I briefly let go of Ash's hand to hug my father. We're going to be fine, Dad. I know it. ~ I feel Tori's hand in mine and I know I'm safe. I've only known my sister for three days but she saved me and I love her. Dad's here too, I hear him gently turning the page of his book. He loves to read. He does it to calm his nerves when he's worried. There's no need to worry now, Dad, we're going to be just fine. As a reassurance the music comes again, just as I fall asleep again. Did you ever feel you're someone else inside And no one understands You are Don't worry baby, you're going to be just fine Minutes or hours later- I can't tell- I wake. Tori's hand remains in mine, and Dad isn't here. 'Dad went to get a coffee.' Tori explains. She adds, 'I made him go.' I nod, understanding. Tori looks me in the eyes and I notice how similar she looks to me. We both have our mother's green eyes. I lay back and listen as Tori tells me about her life. I can't believe she thought dad was dead all this time. I'm fascinated with everything she tells me, that she feels the music too, that I was possessed by a spirit, that she was shot by spirits who weren't there, and then they were. She also tells me about Mulder and Dana, and everything they did to help her. Her words alone immediately make me feel warmth towards them. I ask her if I'll get to meet them and she replies, 'Of course, Ash, of course. Hey, look, here they are now!' She says, smiling. I look at the two people who enter, a pretty red-haired woman with deep blue eyes, and a man with brown hair and greenish eyes. They both greet Tori and come over to me. The woman who must be Dana speaks. 'Hi Ash, I'm Dana, and this is Mulder.' 'Hey.' I say, happy. 'Hey, Ash.' Mulder says, 'I got you something.' My eyes light up as he hands me a magazine on the planets. How did he know that's what I love most? 'Aw, thanks!' I say, beaming. 'I thought you might like to read it if you're going to be here for a little longer.' I nod, and turn the magazine over to find an article on aliens. I smile. So what Tori said about Mulder is true. ~ Mulder and Dana talked with Ash a while longer before leaving, Dana could tell Ash was tired. He's been in hospital for three days longer now and he's about ready to go. I've been staying at Dad's house, getting settled in. I moved the things I had from Dana's place to Dad's. Dana was really nice to let me keep the things she bought me, but then, I don't really think she'd have much use for clothes and CD's. Ash and I are going to visit Dana and Ash often; Ash really enjoys hearing Mulder talk about extra-terrestrials. 'Tori, Ash, are you ready?' Dad asks, coming in. Dad and I had gone back to the hospital to pick up Ash, and I've been helping Ash pack while dad was getting breakfast. 'Yeah dad.' I say, and Ash echoes me. I smile. I listen as the music comes again, and I know that Ash can hear it too. ~We'll run away together We'll spend some time forever We'll never feel bad anymore~ 'Come on Ash; let's go home.' I put an arm around his shoulder and steer him towards the stairs. I smile as the three of us, father, son and daughter head towards the car park. It was supposed to be like this. Fini Just a reminder of how much I love feedback and would really, really like some! :) Thanx ppl Jaci C.