From: Eastsider Date: 2 Jun 2003 03:22:04 -0700 Subject: [all-xf] NEW: Pool With A View by UnNameable Source: atxc TITLE: Pool With A View AUTHOR: UnNameable (aka, Eastsider) ALTERNATE EMAIL: unnameable@duchovny.i-p.com CATEGORY: Humor, Scully POV, MSR RATING: R SIZE: 20k ARCHIVE: Gossamer, Ephemeral. Others, let me know. SPOILERS: None. DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Ought to be. SUMMARY: An embarrassing moment of mythological proportions. Pool With A View by UnNameable The summer of Mulder's senior year of high school, he taught a swim class for a group of teen-aged girls. One morning, he arrived for the class sporting a huge rip down the front of his swim shorts. That was one of Mulder's most embarassing moments, but it didn't stop him from telling me all about it. We happened to be on our way back from shopping at the Gaslamp Quarter when he told me the story. We were going to be leaving the next morning for a case in San Diego, and had a few little things to buy before we went to our respective homes to pack. "Scully, I swear I didn't know that I was swinging in the wind until one of the girls yelled out, 'Hey, Fox, put that thing away before you hurt somebody!'." His story almost caused me to run the car off the road. "Damm! Mulder, you *cannot* tell me stories like that while I'm driving!" He tapped me on the knee. "But it's all true, Scully. I'm *not* making this up!" "I believe you. I do! And in light of that experience, I wish you would reconsider the Spee..." "No, Scully, no way. My cargo trunks are much more comfortable. They have a looser fit and there's more coverage. I can't believe you'd buy something so...small, and expect me to wear it in public!" "Why not?" I glanced over at him. "Scully, *you* wouldn't wear a bikini if I asked you!" "Of course, I would. Just not in public." I thought I sensed a slight change in Mulder's attitude. Sure enough, his voice was a bit lower when he replied. "A private show?" "Maybe." We had reached his street, and I pulled over to let him out. After he unbuckled his seat belt, he leaned over to kiss me lightly on the cheek. "Alright, Scully. I'll wear the *loincloth*, if you'll wear the bikini." I actually blushed at the vision of Mulder in a loincloth with cougar print. "That's a tempting offer, but I don't own a --" Mulder, had suddenly become fascinated with a spot on the dashboard. --bikini." I peered at Mulder over my sunglasses. "Or do I?" "I made a *small* purchase of my own. Tit for tat, Scully," was his reply, as he got out of the car and ran up the steps of his apartment building. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Mulder and I were booked into a nice hotel in San Diego. We decided we'd pay the extra bucks per night to upgrade our accomodations from the usual government-approved. From our upgraded rooms, we could see the pool area just outside. Although I wasn't crazy about it because of the noise, Mulder liked the convenience of having a room near the pool. I indulged him. It wasn't intolerable. And Mulder had certainly indulged me plenty of times. So, having wrapped up our case early in the afternoon, we decided to relax at the hotel pool on our last evening in town. The weather had ranged from pleasantly warm to hot the entire time we were there. Perfect for swimming. Mulder retrieved the aforementioned cargo trunks, preparing to hit the water for a few laps. He still wouldn't take my advice and wear the little black Speedos with the lime green stripe that I had purchased for him. I had managed to get him to try them on, and while he admitted they were a good fit, refused to wear them outside of the room. "No way I'm stepping out in these, even though I do appreciate the way you're looking at me right now." I circled him a couple of times. "Mulder, they do look good on you." "Scully, I-I just feel like my boys are too 'out there' in Speedos, you know?" This from a man who thrives on being 'out there'? For what it's worth, I tried to make him see reason. "Mulder, they're very well constructed. Your *boys* will feel more- secure. Look here, they even have a pouch sewn in the..." "Then *you* can wear them! Scully, please! I like the cargos better for swimming, okay? I'll be happy to wear these for you all night." "All night?" "Slip of the tongue." He winked at me and pointed to his carry-on bag. "Don't forget, I've got *your* outfit for the evening and I can hardly wait to see you model it." Oh, well. I was looking forward to that myself. I handed him his cargo trunks, smacked him on the butt, and waited for him to change. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Now, for Mulder, a pool is a place to get some exercise. He usually does at least six laps, time permitting. For me, a pool is a place to sit back, relax, and watch Mulder exercise. He always makes a point of inviting me into the water with him, using his most sexy "come-hither" look as bait. Mulder is the poster boy for the "come-hither". I've tried to take him up on his invitations. Even gone so far as to stick my foot in the water. It cracks him up because he knows good and well that, to me, a public pool is the equivalent of used bath water. He also knows that swimming just isn't my favorite form of exercise. Mulder's okay with my public pool paranoia, though. He knows I'm much more receptive to indoor sports. Some like to "people watch" when they're sitting by a hotel pool. That afternoon, that's what I had planned. After Mulder and I slathered sun-block on each others un-covered areas, I sat on my deck chair, wearing my favorite one-piece bathing suit. I had a nice, frosty, virgin daquiri, and thought nice, warm, non-virgin thoughts while I watched him hop into the pool to practice surface dives. He was very good at it, so graceful, the way his butt popped up in mid dive. I watched his legs and feet rise vertically, the slide down in a perfect line, until all I could see were the arches of his feet, then his toes. He wiggled them just as they disappeared beneath the water. Ahhh, yes. There were quite a few people about, mostly women as luck would have it. Luck, you say? That's right. I find it entertaining to observe other women's reaction to Mulder, and other men's reaction to the women's reaction. A half-dressed, half-naked, soaking wet Fox Mulder is a beautiful, but potentially dangerous thing. Women, and some men, find it almost impossible to ignore him in that state. The way they behave is, like I said, entertaining. Mulder had just executed an elegant dive off the board, and was very pleased about it, I could tell. I was pleased too, by the way the other women around the pool applauded and whistled. I was mentally listing in my mind all of the ways I would reward him later for his performance. I watched him glide to the pool steps, pulling himself up and out of the water. He had begun to stroll in my direction, all the while smoothing his hands over his face and through his hair to remove the excess water. It trickled down his chest and stomach, over his shoulders and down his back. Like a younger, sexier, clean-shaven Poseidon, Mulder approached me, carrying his staff in, shall I say, the upright-but-non-traditional position. I lurched forward in my deck chair, spilling my drink on the groound, my sunglasses falling from my face, unheeded. I'm not sure how long my mouth hung open, or when I lost my hearing and ability to breathe. Not long I guess, because my will to live returned with a vengeance, as evidenced by my tongue snapping back into my mouth, which in turn must have jump-started my lungs into action, causing me to cough. Mulder had reached me by this time. Sweet guy, he looked so concerned by my distress, then confused by my sudden hysterics. When he asked me to rub more sun-block on him, I began to laugh uncontrollably. I reached for the towel that had been hanging on my chair behind my head and thrust it at him. He grabbed it and began to towel off his hair, face, and shoulders. I was still laughing, so when he asked me what was so funny, all I could do was point toward the diving board, where his swim trunks lay. Mulder looked over at the diving board. Then he looked back at me. And then he looked down. Mulder finally, FINALLY, realized that he was standing in front of me, in a public place, completely nude. His reaction to being buck-naked among a group of total strangers was enough to shame me into silence. I felt horrible for laughing at him, especially when I recalled the story of his previous embarrassment so many years ago in a similar environment. Mulder calmly wrapped my towel around his waist, retrieved my sunglasses from the ground, smiled down at me, and held out his hand to help me rise from my chair. "Let's go, Scully. I'm a bit under-dressed for this crowd." He draped one arm around my shoulders and I placed my hand at the small of his back as we made our way back to our rooms. The women around the pool stood and gave Mulder a standing ovation. Some of the men did, too. The rest just looked pissed. When we reached the sliding glass door of Mulder's room, he pulled it aside and ushered me through, then turned around and bowed to his audience. There was more applause and yells of "Bravo!" and "Encore!" He took a step back, pulled the door closed and drew the curtains, ending the free pool-side show. On the other side of that door, poor Mulder collapsed face down on the bed, mortified, and vowed not to leave the room, even in event of fire, until check-out time the next day. I tried to soothe him as best I could, cooing and stroking his back. "Mulder, I am so proud of the way you handled yourself. No one else in that situation could have pulled it off the way you did." He turned over, with a look on his face that I'd seen before. I closed my eyes, having realized what I'd said. "God, Mulder! I-I didn't mean for it to come out that way. I meant..." But Mulder was chuckling, and pulled me down to hug me, to my relief. "It's okay, Scully. I know what you meant." "It wasn't okay that I laughed at you." I raised my head from his shoulder to look him in the eye. "I'm so sorry about that." "How sorry, exactly?" I brushed my lips across his. "Very. How can I make it up to you?" Mulder regarded me for only a moment. "I can think of a way..." ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ "Scully, come on out or I'm coming in there!" Mulder was getting just a little worked up in anticipation of my swimsuit modelling debut. "Mulder, this isn't just any bikini you bought, it's a G-string bikini!" In fact it had tiny leopard print, something I secretly loved, but never dared to wear. "You don't say! Does it fit?." I came out of the bathroom, still tying one of the strings over my hip. "I thought the idea of these things was that it *wasn't* supposed to fit." From where Mulder sat on the bed, he motioned for me to turn around a few times and I obliged. "Well? What's the verdict?" I asked, looking over my shoulder as I stood with my back to him. Mulder stood, taking all of two steps to get to me. "Mighty damn fine," he breathed into my ear. He reached for the string that held my top in place, the one that I had just tied at my hip- and yanked. "Even better with a few adjustments." -THE END-