Subject: Quitting Time by QofMush
From: QofMush@aol.com (QofMush)
Date: 16 Sep 1997 00:05:45 GMT

Quitting Time by QofMush (QofMush@aol.com)

Summary: When health becomes a factor in her work, Agent Scully takes the
high road.

Category: V,A
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: All characters portrayed within are the property of the FOX
network and the gang at 1013...no infringement is intended.  

Timeline: Takes place in Season 4 sometime after Tempus Fugit/Max.  If you
don't know about the "growth", where have you been?

Archive: Wherever, as long as my name stays attached.  Or maybe I should
think about that...

Dedication: To my little online friends who have taught me that it is okay
to obsess over a television show, as long as it's as good as this one. My
sincerest thanks to the ONEOFUS Coven and Linda for prereading and giving
me the courage to post this.   This especially goes out to the angstoholics
out there, and you know who you are....
          
Feedback: Wouldn't miss it for the world. (QofMush@aol.com)

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

FBI Headquarters

The click of her heels as she walked down the cold hallway kept time to
the beating of her heart.  She felt as if she were marching, like back in
the days of playing in the band . . . why did it feel as if she were
marching to a funeral dirge?

<Keep it together Dana> she sternly rebuked herself.

Her head was held high as she walked down what seemed to be a never-ending
hallway.  When did this hallway get so long?  Maybe it was because she
never seemed to walk this path alone.  Usually on her right was a tall man
who ran a constant patter of wisecracks or outlandish theories as they
headed into another tongue-lashing by their AD.

Yet, this walk she had to walk alone.  Agents said hello as she passed,
she merely nodded.  She knew about the nicknames - Mrs. Spooky or the Ice
Queen. She knew that these days the rumor of her condition was the biggest
story on the grapevine. She overheard people whispering like they are wont
to do when the truth is too hard to say outloud.  "She's the one with
cancer," said in a hushed tone.    The pitying looks and downcast smiles
almost undid her.  But, she had to remain tough, only until the meeting was
over.  Once she did what she came to do, she could escape to the sanctuary
of her car, her apartment, the sea, and cry until she was weak.

<I'm sorry, Ahab.  I know you never raised a Quitter.  But, if you were
here, you would
understand that what I'm about to do is right.  I can't endanger him.  I
only hope he will
understand.>

She rounded the corner and took a deep breath.  The office door was
closed, but the light was on.  Unconsciously, she smelled for cigarette
smoke before knocking.  It was too early for Kimberly, AD Skinner's capable
assistant, to be keeping guard outside.  Scully planned it that way.  The
fewer people to see, the better.

"Come in," the deep voice from behind the door bellowed.

"Good Morning, Sir" Dana greeted with what she hoped was a serene smile as
she walked into AD Skinner's office and closed the door behind her.

"Agent Scully.  How are you feeling?" Skinner stood to gesture her to her
usual chair as Scully tried not to focus on the fact that the twin visiting
chair was conspicuously empty.  

<Can you say codependency, Scully?> God, she even talked to herself in his
voice.

"I'm fine sir.  Thank you for agreeing to meet with me so early on this
Tuesday morning.  Although, from what I understand, this isn't so early."

Skinner winced, remembering the phone call Mulder had made to him to tell
him that Scully was returning to work and to thank Skinner for telling him
to find another way. <I wish I could have taken my own advice>.  What
Skinner could never tell his two favorite agents was that he had made an as
yet unknown deal with the devil to keep them on their search for the truth.
 The devil had yet to come through on either end of their bargain - Scully
didn't seem to be getting better, nor had Skinner been asked to do anything
"special."  Walter S. Skinner had learned to be patient, but this was
getting ridiculous.

"What can I do for you Agent Scully?  It isn't often that I see you
without your partner."

<Thanks for pointing that out, sir.  Okay, Dana, it's now or never.>

"Sir, I've been giving some serious thoughts to our conversation the
evening Agent Pendrell was killed."

<Damn, I knew this would be coming - she cares too much about her partner
to put him in any kind of danger.>

"In light of my condition, I would like to officially request
reassignment.  I'm not interested in a permanent reassignment, just
something temporary until my health is no longer a factor." 

<There, I said it.  That wasn't too difficult.  Now, if I can just
casually get out of here ...>

"Agent Scully, are you listening to me?  I would like your input as to
where you think you should be assigned.  Obviously, your request is
something I will act on immediately.  I think you are doing the right
thing." <I hated to force her on this issue, but the only way to protect
her was to make her think she was protecting him.>

Scully looked up at her boss and noticed that he was giving her that LOOK
that so many people had adopted around her.  The "I am really sorry that
you are dying look."  It had taken her WEEKS to break Mulder of the habit. 
When she finally told him how it made her feel, he looked at her
sheepishly, made some wiseass comment about how she should be grateful that
he even looked at her, and never did it again.

"Thank you sir, I have given this a lot of thought.  I really would prefer
to stay here in DC.  I don't want to go back to Quantico at this point,
although I know they are always in need of forensic pathologists."

"At this point, I would consider your transfer to Quantico a loss to my
organization," Skinner stated vehemently.  He took off his glasses and
rubbed the bridge of his nose while thinking.  <If she's in Quantico,
Mulder will be useless and I won't be able to protect either of them. 
Where can I put her where she can still be of help to Mulder yet no danger
to either of them?  I know they will find a way to work together no matter
where she goes.>  "I take this request very seriously - if I reassign you,
I do not want you thinking that you can still be doing field work with the
X-Files.  I will be assigning Agent Mulder a new partner."

There it was.  The knife through her heart.  She would be replaced.  Well,
better now than later.  This way, she would have a chance to meet him
(Skinner would know better than to assign another woman) and make sure he
was "trustworthy".  There was no way she would leave her post without
making sure Mulder was taken care of.  She could still "help out"
unofficially.  When the X-Files was shut down the first time and Mulder
worked with Krycek she thought she would go mad with jealousy.  Someone
else riding shotgun on Mulder's wild goose chases, listening to his
theories, pretending not to laugh at his jokes, sharing bad food at greasy
restaurants across the country...stop it!  We've been through this Dana. 
This is the right thing.  Better now than later . . . 

"Agent Scully, I have an idea.  Why don't you take a week off and relax
while I think about where we can assign you? There's always room at the
lab" - Skinner's eyes couldn't quite meet Scully's as they both thought of
why there was room at the lab - "and that way you could still be involved
peripherally with the X-Files."

"Thank you sir, time off was going to be my next request.  I would like to
take a week off.  The lab assignment is one that I look forward to if you
deem it appropriate," Scully stated, trying not to look too hopeful at the
prospect of still working with Mulder - even if it was as a lab rat.

Skinner watched her face light up at the prospect.  Why did this beautiful
young woman have to suffer?  She had lost so much in her short tenure with
the X-Files  - three months of her life, her sister, a good friend in
fellow Agent Pendrell, and now the biggest loss of all - possibly her life.
The AD tried hard not to get personally involved with his agents, but he
had always had a soft spot for the unlikely pairing of Mulder and Scully. 
He admired Fox Mulder for his passion and his brain and his dedication to
the truth, but truths be told, he had always had a paternal soft spot for
Dana Scully.  Perhaps it was because they had more in common - both of them
loyal soldiers who seemed to always be two steps behind Spooky Mulder. 
Scully always tried to follow the right path - and Skinner admired her for
that.  Even when faced with some of the horrors that Mulder brought to her,
Scully stood firm and tried to prove them scientifically.  Skinner always
suspected that Mulder never quite appreciated how the diminutive redhead
had saved his career and furthered his work.    Without her scientific
backing, his theories would still be considered OUT THERE.  Before their
partnership, Mulder was a kook in the basement - now they were considered
two of the best agents in the bureau.  But, that was going to have to change.

Skinner snapped himself out of his reverie to ask the one question he
dreaded above all, "Have you informed Agent Mulder of your decision and
reason behind it?"

"No, sir.  I would appreciate it if you would somehow explain this to him.
 You have seen my latest medical reports to see that my treatment, while
being somewhat successful, is also making me weak.  Too weak to be a
qualified field agent.  Agent Mulder would somehow find a way around this -
he would try and talk me out of this, so I have to ask that you tell him."
<Because, the truth is, I think the look in his eyes when I tell him I am
leaving will be my final breaking point.  I've held it together like a good
mate, Ahab, but when he finds out I'm deserting him, all floodgates will loose.>

"Understood, Agent Scully.  However, I can't guarantee that he won't come
looking for you.  If you really don't want him to find you, better start
that vacation early.  I will be meeting with Agent Mulder to discuss this
later today.  We need to continue the work in the X-Files with no
interruption."  <Jesus, Walter - a little compassion for the poor woman! 
Must you drive it home to her that she will be replaced and Mulder will go
on?  Try to make it up to her.>  With that, Skinner stood, walked around
the desk and placed his hand on Scully's shoulder paternally.  "Please,
enjoy your vacation.  Try to get some rest, and this will all work out. 
When you have fully recovered, you know your position at the X-Files will
be waiting for you.  No matter whom Mulder has been antagonizing while you
are gone."

Scully almost jumped at the kind way the Assistant Director was talking to
her and touching her.  <Why do people all feel sorry for me?>  "Thank you
sir,"  Scully responded as she stood and broke the contact, "I know exactly
where I am going."

Special Agent Dana Scully closed the door of Walter Skinner's office and
walked down the hall.  Click. Click. Click.  Her heels were still beating
out that funeral dirge. <I know exactly where I'm going.  I'm going to the
sea.  Because the sea is life.  Forgive me Mulder.  Understand,forgive, and
trust me.  I know what I'm doing is right.>

Click. Click. Click.  Like a funeral dirge.  Like a metronome.  Like a
heartbeat.


END

Authors Notes:
I've read my share of fanfic...more than my share!  And, I have to say
that some of the stuff out there is so incredibly good that I was very
nervous about posting  this.  Some of you out there consistently amaze,
amuse and angstify me and I am eternally grateful.  I do not pretend to be
in your leagues, but the muse struck me for this particular story.  I
wondered soon into the cancerarc how theywere going to deal with a partner
who would be receiving treatments that would physically makeher weak and
probably unable to be out in the field.  When Skinner hinted at this in
Max, I thought they were going somewhere.  But, then Mulder had holes
drilled in his head and shot himself.  So, I had to take matters into my
own hands...