From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org
Date: Fri, 17 Nov 2000 01:47:44 -0600
Subject: RC by Ante Up
Source: direct

Reply To: the_antes_up@spacemail.com


Title: RC
Author: Ante Up
Rating: PG
Keywords: MSR
Feedback: Welcomed at the_antes_up@spacemail.com
Archive: Sure fine whatever, just drop a line 
telling me.

Spoilers: the whole enchilada, specifically Je 
Souhaite, Requiem, Tooms 

Summary:  A journal entry to Mulder while he 
is missing...

Notes: Probably a little sappy, but we all need
a little of it in our lives.
_____________

Mulder, 

I find myself doing the silliest things.  

Things my rationale mind rails against but my emotional mind 
cannot help but carry through.  Things like dabbing your cologne 
on my jackets, obsessively following the Knicks' schedule, 
memorizing the number of gray suits versus black suites in your 
closet, counting the number of times Caddyshack is on television 
since you've been gone. 

Last night, for instance, is a good example of what I have resorted 
to doing.   

I went home, showered, fixed myself some dinner and tea and 
sat on the couch.  Idly watching the evening news and 
caressing my stomach, trying to sooth our son's hiccups, I 
picked up a scent, your scent.  You should have seen me 
crawling all over my apartment, on my hands and knees, sniffing 
every object until I found the culprit.  

They say that pregnancy enhances the olfactory ability.  They 
must be right because all I found was your checkbook.  I opened 
it up, and flipped through the checks gleaning any trace of you 
off of them, not just your scent.  In the calendar, last year 
you'd circled two dates, my birthday and our anniversary, as 
partners, March 5.  This year, you'd circled three dates, my 
birthday, our anniversary as partners and then our anniversary, 
as a couple, May 11.  You doodled on the deposit slips at the 
back and made notes to yourself in the margins of the register.  
My favorite is the abbreviated shopping list marked 6/28, the week 
before you disappeared.

Flowers (daises, lilies??); B&J (half-baked); IT, RC.  

You ended up bring lilies, "They smell better than daisies," 
you said.  They didn't have the new Ben and Jerry's flavor 
Half-Baked so you ended up with the classic Triple Caramel 
Chunk.  Iced Tea.  Remote Control.  

That last one was the most special and it brings a smile to my 
face even now.  Opening the door, seeing you armed with true 
romancers of our time, I didn't realize you had sneaked in a 
second remote for the TV and VCR, you smartass.  

Of course, it was perfectly hysterical to you when we were settled 
in watching The Joy Luck Club and I couldn't figure out why the 
VCR stopped playing the tape every five minutes.  Immediately, I 
should have suspected you had something to do with it because the 
Yankees were playing Detroit and that is what we kept seeing every 
time the tape stopped. 

But more memorable was when I finally did realize what was going 
on.  I had gotten up to go to the bathroom and when I came back, 
I saw you hiding the remote behind your back in the couch 
cushions. Did you know I had figured it out?   Or were you just 
pleasantly surprised when instead of sitting beside you I sat in 
your lap.  

Was the twinkle in your eye because I was loving you or because 
of the game?  If you are a smart man, you'll know it was because 
I was loving you.  

Kissing your tender lips to distract you, I sneaked my hand 
behind you to grab the remote but as I pulled my hand back, I 
felt your fingers grip my wrist.  You weren't going to give up 
so easily.  Your foot resting on the coffee table pushed it back 
and away and we ended up on the floor, laughing as we wrestled for 
control.  When you started to tickle me I forgot all about the 
remote, but I think you did too.  When had we ever laughed like 
that night?  It was enough to make us forgot everything except 
each other.  

We paused to catch our breath, you pinning me to the floor, 
hovering just above me.  The moment changed, the meaning of who 
we were together always - the complexities, the respect, the 
passion, and the love - merged with the joy and laughter of that 
instant.  

You kissed me reverentially and my heart filled. 

You paused, eyes sparkling...

You whispered, "Marry me, Scully... someday," and I whispered, "Yes."

You usually kept your checkbook in your trench coat pocket or in 
your desk drawer but now it is with me always, anything to keep 
you near to me.  Though I suppose you cannot get much closer than 
your place in my heart and our baby.  When you come back we'll 
frame that one page with that list and you will circle three more 
days in your calendar, the day I said yes, the day we get married 
and the day we have our baby.  



The End