From: Scott Miller Date: 11 Jul 1998 17:07:15 -0500 Subject: NEW: Rainfall (1/1) Rainfall PG VA Spoils The End -------------- Fresh out of my fanfic coma, heres a piece fit for The End. Ignore FtF if you want this to make sense. Chris Carter owns the characters, I just make them real. Feedback welcome at scgmille@indiana.edu Rainfall by Scott Miller The lights came to an abrupt halt as the fire engine drove calmly off into the still night. Scully lifted her chin from the silent statue that was her partner. She looked up, seeing him stare at the same place at the wall. 'Shock,' her training told her. She placed a hand on his shoulder and spoke. "Mulder." He blinked, but didn't move. "Mulder!" He looked down, and she breathed a sigh of relief. "We need to go." "Scully..." he said, voice hoarse and barely a whisper. "I know, Mulder. I know." She tugged softly on his t-shirt and let her hand trail down his arm to his own fingers. Like a mother rushing her son away from the scene of an accident, she pulled him reluctantly toward an elevator and out of his home forever. Silence was the only resident of Scully's passenger seat on the way to her apartment. Mulder sat quietly watching the passing lights and chewing on his bottom lip. In all honesty, Scully thought, he looked remarkable calm. Too calm, she told herself. He had only released her hand when she put him in the seat and buckled him in. He stared straight ahead as she had walked to seat herself, but didn't protest when she took his hand again back on the road. He almost seemed to relax visibly when she did so. When she pulled the car up to the sidewalk, he looked towards her slowly, his eyes hollow pools of black. Her brows furrowed in sorrow for him. Then her mask fell into place, and she released herself from his grasp. "Come in, Mulder. You need some sleep." He chuckled, a soft, smile-less laugh from deep within that lasted only a moment, and then was gone. She looked back at his face, frozen as before, and waited. "How many nights, Scully?" "Mulder?" "How many nights did I try to sleep, worrying about my sister. And all along, she'd already stopped worrying about me." "I'm sure she just..." "NO! She didn't. I held on so long, just because..." He stopped, tears filling his eyes and his features contorting. Suddenly, the door flew open as Mulder leaped out and began running. "Mulder! Mulder wait!" She started the motor and drove down the street, just in time to see him duck into a darkened street. She turned around and followed, loosing him only for a moment before spotting him on his back on a dark sidewalk. Cautiously, she pulled the car up to the curb a dozen feet away and turned off the engine. Arriving at his side, she winced at blood from his nose, flowing slowly down his cheek to the pavement. "Mulder, are you alright?" "I'm fine. I just...I fell." He laughed. "I just fell, and there they were, millions of them, all staring down and saying, 'She's not here!' 'Not here either!'" His eyes resumed their faraway look, as his smile faded. Scully looked at his eyes, frowning. "I used to play this game with myself when I couldn't sleep, I would look at each star and ask if it was hiding her, but they all said no. Each night, I would go to sleep wondering which star would say yes, and what I would say to bring her back." Scully ran her hand through his hair, slowly, then spoke. "Mulder, why did you hold on?" He paused, considering. "I thought she loved me. I thought if I could just find her... god this sounds so childish, and I have the psych degree." He paused, considering the weight of his words. "If I found her, I would be loved." He sighed. "But she didn't care, Scully. Not for me. She cared for her husband... her kids. Her new life. Not me." Scully dabbed at his nose with a handkerchief, then lifted his head from the pavement and put his hand to the cloth. "Come on, I'm taking you home." Mulder looked up at her, puzzled. Scully reached down and took Mulder's hand, lifting him from the pavement, a confused look still plastered to his saddened features. Scully walked him to the car and sat him in his seat, returning once again to the other side. Five silent minutes later, they arrived at Mulder's apartment complex, and took a wordless walk to his front door. Mulder took his keys and unlocked the door, stepping into the darkness. Scully stepped after him, and he stopped, looking over his shoulder. "I'm alright Scully. You should go home and get some rest." She looked down at his shoes, then up to his eyes. "I'd like to stay... And I don't think you're alright." "I'm fine." She winced, realizing the sting of her own words back to haunt her. "No you're not. And I think you know that." Mulder turned back to the darkness of his apartment, his chest heaving with a sigh. "You're right," he spoke softly. Scully closed the door behind her, then followed Mulder as he lay on the couch, staring at the ceiling. Bringing a finger to his nose, Mulder wiped a smudge of blood from under his nose. Letting out a strangled chuckle, he looked to Scully, standing still in at the end of the couch. "I am a mess, aren't I." He paused. "What am I going to do?" "Mulder. What are We going to do? I'm just as much a part of this as you." "You don't have to do anything, Scully. Don't you see? This is your chance. You can leave. Be a doctor. Teach. Have a family. Please, while you still have the chance." Scully sat on the edge of the couch next to Mulder's feet before speaking. "You think thats what I want?" "I know its what you could've had if it wasn't for me." "But I want this," she said, waving a hand through the air. "I'm just as much a part of this as you, and I wouldn't have it any other way." Mulder shook his head in disbelief, then sat up to face her. For the first time since the fire, Mulder's eyes filled with tears. Looking at the floor, he let out a clipped laugh. "You really mean it." A realization, not a question. She nodded. He sat up slowly. "All this time," he said softly. Again she nodded. Tentatively, Mulder raised a hand to Scully's hair. With a look of pure awe he idle twirled a lock of her hair just behind her ear. "Oh Mulder," Scully said with resignation. She leaned forward into an embrace as the rain began to fall.