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Title:  The Reckoning
Category:  MSR  
Rating:  NC-17  I think.  
Summary:  Mulder and Scully realize how close they came to losing each
other, takes place post-Movie, in the scene at the end, where they are
holding hands on the Plaza.

Disclaimer:  These people belong to Chris Carter and 10-13.

Author's note:  Um.  This is a first time story, post Movie.  Please be
gentle.


The feeling of Scully's fingers linked with his own took Mulder back,
back to the moments he'd stood watching Robert Modell in the Intensive
Care Unit.

Back to the feeling of nearly losing her.

It wasn't so hard to remember, he'd nearly lost her again to the demon
he'd been chasing all his life.  Remembering that alien umbilical that
he'd pulled out of her in the ship, he shuddered and held her hand more
tightly.  "Scully...."

She looked up at him and he realized again how fragile she was.  Her eyes
looked bruised, she still looked battered from their ordeal.  "What,
Mulder?"

He wanted to kiss her again, but didn't dare.  His throat was tight. 
"Come on, let me take you home."

Scully's blue eyes, warmer than blue should be, studied him.  She smiled.
 "That sounds wonderful, Mulder."  Her voice was soft, as warm as velvet.
 

They walked in comfortable silence to the car.

Scully leaned back against the headrest, studying Mulder's profile.  He
looked tired, as tired as she felt.  But he had come through for her,
just as he had so many times before.   She couldn't begin to describe the
way it had felt to see his face in that strange and eerie place. 
Shivering and sick, she had looked up into his eyes and realized just how
much she loved him and trusted him.  Only him.  Now she just had to
figure out a way to convince *him* of that.

She reached out and took his hand, he turned his head and smiled at her. 
His eyes looked haunted.

They were haunted.  He didn't think he deserved that smile, he told
himself that he didn't.  If not for him, she would not have suffered at
all.  She would be on her way up the Bureau ladder.

Instead, she was here, at his side.  And she had lost so much.  Her
sister, her chance to have a normal life, her unborn children, and nearly
her life.   First to the cancer, and then to this.  He squeezed her
fingers gently, wishing he could give it all back to her.

He wished he could give everything back that she had given him.  She was
steadfast, loyal, she made him whole.  He'd told her the truth in the
hallway.  He'd wanted to hold her against him, to never let her go.  He'd
wanted to bury his face in her bright hair and protect her from all that
was evil.

She was so beautiful, so brave and so fragile.  He had to send her away,
but he couldn't.  She wouldn't go, and he did not have the courage to
force her.  He would simply have to protect her as best he could. 
Because losing her would kill him.

"A penny for your thoughts," she asked gently.  

He forced himself to smile.  "Just thinking how good it is to be back. 
To have you safe."

Her eyes held his for a moment, willing him to understand all that she
could not find words to say.

His throat tightened, and his eyes filled with tears.  It was hard to see
her.  He blinked away tears of relief and squeezed her hand again.

They drove the rest of the way holding hands.


At Scully's apartment, Mulder came in and stood in the livingroom
uncertainly while Scully went into the kitchen.

"Coffee or tea, Mulder?" she called.

"Whatever you're having, Scully," he told her and sat down in the couch. 
He rubbed his hand on a cushion and contemplated what he'd seen when
Eddie Van Bluhndt had masqueraded as him.   That had been the moment he
had first realized what he'd felt for Dana Scully.  The intense flash of
jealousy he'd experienced had nearly driven him to pound Eddie Van
Bluhndt to pieces.

But he'd kept his calm and they hadn't talked about it much.  They were
both too uncomfortable with what the whole thing had revealed.  They had
kept the balance in their partnership and friendship, but the Eddie Van
Bluhndt matter had been still there, still unspoken.

He wished he'd had more courage.  It had taken her nearly leaving before
he'd been brave enough to voice what he felt, before he'd been brave
enough to take her in his arms and lean down to taste that tempting
mouth.

She'd nearly died from the beesting.  It hadn't been a ordinary beesting,
it had nearly created the monster that would have eaten her up, like a
trapdoor wasp.  He shuddered, lost in the memory of her trapped in ice
and the alien tube.

A hand touched his shoulder.  He looked up, welcomed her smile.

Mulder was brooding again.  Scully sat down beside him and took his hand
again.  "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."  

But his eyes didn't look fine.  His expressive hazel eyes still looked
haunted by worlds of guilt and pain.  

Reaching up, Scully touched his smoothly shaven cheek, put her palm
against it.  "Mulder, it wasn't your fault."  She tried to put all her
love and trust into her voice.

He forced a smile.  "I know that, Scully."

He didn't believe her.  She sighed, leaned up and touched his mouth with
her own.  

Living satin brushed too-briefly across his lips and he barely stifled a
groan.  Mulder let go of her and put his arms around her, somehow pulling
her into his lap.  He buried his face in her throat.  "God, I just can't
stop thinking about how close that was."

His voice was broken and shaky.  She put her hand on the back of his head
and felt his lips against her throat, the the way she'd dreamed of for so
long.  She shivered.  "Mulder, you came through for me, you always do." 
She willed him to believe her, to listen to her.  "You're the only one I
can always count on."

There were hot tears on her skin, burning her.  "Scully, if I lost you,
it would kill me."

She smiled and pressed her cheek against his soft, spicy-scented hair. 
"You won't ever lose me, Mulder.  Don't you know that by now?"

He raised his head again, his eyes wet with tears.  "I don't deserve
you."

She smiled fondly at him.  "Yes, you do, Mulder."  And she leaned forward
and kissed him gently again.

His arms went around her.  He held her tightly, her small form pressed
against him.  She was so beautiful, so brave, and whatever she thought,
he didn't deserve her.  He never had.  The only thing he had to offer her
was his love and that was small exchange for what she'd lost.

But she kissed him back, her mouth flowering open under his.  He gasped
as their tongues met, mingled, dancing and twining together, like liquid
flame.  He groaned and held her closer.  "Scully, I have to tell you....I
love you."

Leaning back, she brushed a lock of hair back from his forehead.  She
gazed into his eyes, smiled at him again.  "I know, Mulder.  I love you,
too."

He stared at her, not daring to believe, but her eyes told him the truth.
 His eyes filled with tears again.  "Scully, you've lost so much, all I
can offer is myself."

"Mulder, you're more than enough."  Her voice was serious.  "I think
we've wasted enough time.

He thought his heart would burst from joy.  No more wasted time, he
promised silently and kissed her again, his hands stroking her back.  

She ran her hands down his chest, feeling the white dress shirt like an
obstacle.  Oh, she wanted him.  She had wanted him for so long, but had
never allowed herself to recognize it.  Drawing back, she loosened his
tie while she held his gaze, then tugged the silk away from him. 
"Mulder, let's take this someplace more comfortable."

He looked so sweet, so stunned that she had to kiss him again.  She
gasped as his arm slid under her legs and he lifted her.  Putting her
arms around his neck, she laughed softly, gasped again as he kissed her. 
"Are you sure, Scully?"  His voice was anxious, but tender.

She put one tiny hand on his cheek.  "I'm sure, Mulder."  She had never
been so sure before.  

His smile was like the sunrise.  He carried her in to her bedroom and
laid her gently down, lying beside her.  

More kisses to warm her heart and soul and she sighed happily.  Their
clothes seemed to magically disappear as they kept kissing.  His body was
long and lean, his chest nearly smooth.  She could feel his throbbing
length against her skin and she stroked it with her hand, making him
gasp.  

They were necking like kids, she told herself and whimpered as Mulder's
mouth found a nipple.  She arched her back, wanting more, and his hand
slid down her side, to her thigh, and then between her legs, to the damp,
tangled,  red curls there. 

Oh, she was so wet, Mulder moaned against her skin.  He moved his mouth
to her other nipple and sucked on it.  She was so beautiful like this,
small perfect breasts, soft satiny skin, and he wanted to give her
pleasure.  He found the small nub of desire with his fingers and stroked
it.  She arched up against his fingers and he knew he'd found the spot.  

She was dying of the pleasure, she wanted more.  She could hear the small
sounds of want escape from her throat and tugged at his hair, made him
raise his head and kiss her again.

Her hips rocked up and down against his hand and waves and waves of
pleasure swept over her.  Until finally, the last and biggest wave rolled
over, making her cry out his name again and again, her inner core
tightening on his fingers until she was released.

He'd drawn back to watch her face, so beautiful, and listened to her
calling his name.  His manhood throbbed against her thigh, he longed to
enter her, to fill her, to make her his in a primitive way that he'd
almost forgotten through the years of loneliness.

"Mulder!" she begged, all pride gone, only needing him to claim her.

He kissed her reverently, passionately.  "I love you, Dana," he whispered
and shifted over her, guided himself to her tender opening.  She lifted
herself to him, he groaned as he entered her, molten heat surrounding
him, gripping him.

"I love you, Fox," she whispered and then moaned as he filled her.  "Oh,
Fox, yes."

He thought he might die of happiness, of pleasure.  She was his, he was
hers, and no one and nothing could ever drive them apart.  Leaning up on
his elbows, he watched her face, tried to drive her to the brink again,
while trying to control himself  But it was no use, she wanted him to
lose control, and he did, thrusting in again and again and calling her
name.  He felt safe and loved for the first time in his life, for the
first time in so long that he couldn't remember.

And she welcomed him, pulling him in deeper, gasping and crying out. 
Until he felt her begin to quiver again, her breath coming faster, and he
couldn't hold himself back.  Thrusting again, he felt her climax, lost
the last shred of control and spilled himself in her, loving her, melting
into her heat.

Sank down over her, trying to remember his weight, her fragility, panting
and trembling from the force of his own climax.  "Oh, Jesus, Dana."

"Shhhhh."  Her voice was soft and he shivered.  

She was here with him.  She loved him, she returned his love.  She was
alive.

"I love you," he whispered and kissed her again.  She always would be
here, he was going to make sure. 

Scully sighed.  "I love you," she returned.  "I'm here, Mulder."  She
held him tightly.  "I always will be."

And he wept with joy and relief.

The End