From: MLisYL Date: 21 Feb 2000 20:33:40 GMT Subject: xfc NEW:Scared (xcops post ep) Title: Scared Catagory: MSR Author: Mary Astadourian (Email:MLisYL@aol.com) Distrubution: Go for it! Just let me know Spoilers/Timeframe: It's right after X-Cops so I guess a small spoiler for that Rated: PG Feedback: PLEASE! Tell me it's horrible just tell me something! Disclaimer: I don't own them, but it's not my fault I have to borrow them, if I didn't they'd never have any fun Author's Notes: Again, I have to thank Jess for urging me to write another fic, and Markis for not breaking up with me when finding out about my "Addiction" (to fanfic of course) They were pretty much silent on the way back to the hotel room. They chatted on the way to the airport and on the plane. Small talk on the way to the office, to pick up their cars, and a quick " 'bye" as they drove away. But the case was on both of their minds.... Scully's Apartment 9:17pm A loud knock awakened me from my thoughts of the case as I finished heating up left over Chinese food in the microwave. It had to be Mulder and I was busy so I yelled that it was open. Sure enough he walked into the kitchen a few moments later. Dressed the same as the night before....simply gorgeous. "Hey" he said,leaning back against the counter "Hey" I arched my eyebrow in question. Why was he here? "You want anything?" "I just thought I'd stop by..." "To eat." I smiled a little as I motioned to the food."I meant do you want anything to eat?" He grinned at me, not the mushy one that boarders on unattractive but an attractive grin, "I had Chinese before I came over.Great minds think alike." "So it seems" I answered,pouring myself a glass of water."Anything to drink then?" "Nope" he moved from my kitchen to my living room then, following me. "So you just thought you'd stop by...?" "I was thinking about the case...Why I wasn't afraid." "You figured it out too early you knew not to be afraid." "But before hand." he sat on the couch, the opposite end from me, "It's like after all this time this stuff doesn't frighten me. And that's scary in it's self." "You aren't immune to fear if that's what you mean. But you've done enough of these cases to know that you are capable of handling what happens." "So why weren't you scared?" "I told you I was. Just not for my life." He began to laugh a little, his eyes telling me he was thinking of something. "What is it?" "It's just, I know it shouldn't be funny, but how old do you think that deputy was, 25?30?" "About." "And he still thought the worst way to die was the wasp man. That was his biggest fear." "Biggest fear surrounding death at least." "Right." I laughed a little at that and took a forkfull of rice. "What about you?" he paused to let me swallow but that didn't give me enough time to catch his drift. "Am I afraid of the wasp man?" He smiled again, the smile that made butterflies appear in, my stomach (after all these years still butterflies!) "No,not the wasp man, I meant what is your biggest fear. How don't you want to die?" his voice changed in that sentence it went from teasing to sincere. Maybe it was that. Or maybe it was the fire. Or maybe it was how comfortable I felt then, maybe that's what made me say the thing that would change us. "I guess..." I paused to put my glass down, pulling my knees up to my chest I slid into the corner of the couch, "Well honestly?" "Yeah. that's what I'm lookin for" his arm now lay across the back of the couch, his hand not on my shoulder but not to far away. "I'm afraid of dying if you are trying to protect me." "What do you mean?" "I would hate to die when I was with you, on a case or something, because I know you. And I know you'd blame yourself." He nodded slowly, "Yeah...yeah I probably would...Well I guess great minds do think alike then." I smiled at him and he returned the gesture, "Why's that?" "I'd hate to die trying to protect you. Because if I died that probably means I didn't protect you. And that you would die too." "You shouldn't worry about other people so much,Mulder. It's this horrible guilt complex..." He interuppted me though, "I don't worry about other people. I worry about you." " I know." "And who's the one worrying about how the person is going to feel after their death? Hmm?" he teased "You asked and I answered you honestly" I may have been a little defensive in my response but his face didn't change "And I appriciate that.But the guilt wouldn't last for long." "Gee thanks" with sarcasm He chuckled and his eyes met mine, "The guilt wouldn't last long, because I wouldn't last long" Our eyes were locked for a moment. He leaned in a little, I could tell what I had been waiting for...for seven years..a real kiss...not a "please don't leave" kiss or a "happy new year" kiss. A real kiss. And only moments before our lips met, he was so close now, he's slide the length of the couch so subtly,we were so close and RING!!RING!! Yup...bee stings and telephone calls...just faboulous. My only saving grace was that the phone was right behind the couch, I wouldn't have to move out of the position. Obviously he backed up a little, but only his face. He had jumped a little when the phone rang. "Hello?....Yes...Hi!....No,not at all...yeah...oh that's great...uh-huh...Todd?...No,no Gina...yeah...about two years ago...no we only went out once or twice...yeah my mother probably..." it was an old friend from college. We hadn't talked in about 2 months and she picked then to call....I needed new friends. Mulder stood to leave and I asked Jess to hold on, "Mulder, I'll be off in a minute. Stay." "No, I should really get going. The snow is piling up." "It won't be any higher in a minute." I countered a soft smile started in his eyes but never quite worked it's way to his mouth. But he nodded none the less and walked into the kitchen. "I'm back...yeah...no...No!...I wish...again my mother's doing...uh-huh.." I listened to her tell me a story all the while watching Mulder in my kitchen, pouring himself a glass of water and leaning against the counter watching me. He was perfect..everything I wanted in a man and everything I'd always hated...hated in other guys..loved in Mulder...isn't life odd? He motioned to the door with his head and I shook mine. "Jess?Yeah...right..exactly....when are you coming? No.. I mean it. You can stay here. I'll be at work when you get here...are you going to my mother's?" i was trying to talk fast, I was trying to beat Mulder's water. He was almost done. "Get her key for here. Yeah,great I'll see you tomorrow. 'Bye" I waited for her reply then hung up. "All done." I said and couldn't contain myself anymore I just cracked up. Not hysterically laughing mind you but I was definitly laughing..hard. He walked over and placed his hands on the couch and positioned himself so he was looming over me, "What?" he asked amused "It's just" I paused and stifled my giggles, "It's just humorous." "What is?" "This. This whole thing. It's like some cosmic sign that we shouldn't kiss or something." "Now,now Dr.Scully I thought you didn't believe in cosmic signs." I smiled saying "I don't" "Good" And it was then that Mulder and I had our first real kiss. I've kissed my share of men...hell in my "rebellious Catholic school girl"phase I kissed 2 women's share of men. But that...that was by far the best kiss I've ever had. It was just perfect. It was like our mouths were made for each other...Alot of things changed that night...I'm not one for sharing private details...but I will say that Mulder looks just as good without that outfit...and I had to call Jess back...to tell her she would have to stay in a hotel after all...I'd be home all day...with Mulder..only I pronounced Mulder "the flu"...