From: "Dana Mulder" Date: Mon, 04 Dec 2000 21:21:01 -0600 Subject: The Scully Files: Aftermath Part 1 Source: direct Title: "The Scully Files: Aftermath" Author: Cassandra Mulder Rating: PG Archive: Anywhere reputable, as long as you e-mail me about it first, and leave my name attached. Classification: MSR, Angst, Torture Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters! How many times must I tell you people! Spoilers: All the way up through "Requiem". Author's Notes: This is purely a speculation of the events occuring after "Requiem". I do not believe any of this will happen (I'm not that deluded;), it is just my take on the situation. I wasn't going to do it, but obviously I fell into the trap. So opinions are welcome, but keep in mind, it's only fanfic! :) Hopefully, time permitting, there will be a couple more installments. Feedback: Yes, please! At dana_mulder31@hotmail.com POV: Scully ************************************************************************ She heard his words in her head. "There's so much more you need to do with your life. There's so much more than this. There has to be an end, Scully." Scully knew what Mulder had said was true. At least it had been at the time. But now... now there couldn't be an end. There was no end in sight as far as she could see. And that torturous thought is what made her lay her head back in exhaustion. Hospitals. She was so sick of them. And she didn't know another soul who'd been in them as often as she had. It had been nearly 24 hours since she'd told her greatest secret to Skinner. A fact that neither could fully absorb, but she knew no matter how much Skinner didn't believe it, her disbelief was much greater. Even after the initial test and examination, she had requested an ultrasound. As usual, she was hardly bound to believe it until she had proof. Proof that she could actually see. And as she had lay there watching the screen in amazement, the final realization that this was really happening settled on her. There in her very own womb was a very tiny, but very significant life. A life that in the past three years, she hadn't dared hope for. And now, as she sat staring at the still of her ultrasound, she knew that there were only two things that were important from this point on. Her baby, and finding Mulder. But figuring out how to find Mulder would be the difficult part. She needed him now more than she ever had before, and he was unbelievably out of reach. He didn't know. But he had to, she had to tell him. But how I'm I going to find him?, she thought. Well, why should I expect anything in my life to be easy? It's certainly not going to be easy now. She rubbed her eyes, and then ran her fingers through her hair. As troubled as she'd been, she'd miraculously managed some sleep. She couldn't have helped it if she tried. She didn't know how long they were going to keep her here. She probably could've talked her way out of the hospital at any time, but there were more tests to be run, and she was more anxious than anyone for the results of them. But there wasn't any certainty that anything of any kind would show up. It appeared that every sign of her abduction was gone. So far she knew there was a child inside of her, her implant was gone, and the cancer that had been in remission had now completely disappeared. She thought it was strange, but she thanked God for all of it. She wasn't sorry, it was just bizarre that everything she'd lived with for the past six years was suddenly gone. And she didn't know when or how it happened. That was somewhat disturbing, but she had even more pressing things to focus her energy on at the moment. She was going positively stir-crazy, but she hoped to go home tomorrow. She had so many things to do, and no idea where to start. And she hadn't even told her mother about all that had happened. She didn't know how. The shock of her pregnancy would've been enough, but she was also fond of Mulder. Scully sighed heavily. I've really done it now, she thought. There doesn't appear to be any way out this time either. I'd be the happiest woman on earth right now if only Mulder was here, so I could tell him we're having a baby. *We* are having a baby, she thought again. That may have been the hardest thing to believe. Here she was actually carrying Mulder's child, and God only knows where he was. She knew she had to be strong. She knew that she could be, she always had been. But even she had a hard time seeing herself bearing this alone. It was almost too much for anyone. Realistically though, she had no choice. ******************************************************************************** Scully woke up in her own bed at last. She'd finally gotten to come home yesterday afternoon. She was right about the tests. They turned up nothing unusual. Which was ironic, because everything about her, before now, had been unusual. She lingered in bed, mainly because she was dreading what she had to do today. She had to go and see her mother. Scully had gotten on her mother's bad side more than once for not telling her things. Important things concerning her health. As she knocked on her mother's door, Scully knew this would be much harder to explain than anything before it. When Margaret Scully finally answered the door, Scully took a deep breath. "Hi, Mom", she said, smiling. "Hi, Dana. Come on in", Mrs. Scully replied. This visit wasn't unexpected, Scully had called first. But her mother still looked a bit worried. As they sat down in the living room, Mrs. Scully looked anxious, but she didn't push her daughter. "So, how've you been, Dana?", she asked. "Um, Mom, that's what I came to talk to you about. A lot has happened in the past couple of weeks." Mrs. Scully looked slightly startled, but Scully reached out and took her hand. "It's OK, Mom. There are just some things I need to explain. You see, you're the only one I have left." "Dana, what on earth are you talking about?" "OK, I have to go ahead and get this out. Mulder", she said, her eyes filling with tears, "Mulder was abducted three days ago. He went into the Oregon woods with Skinner to look for a UFO. And he didn't come back. A.D. Skinner said he just disappeared, and the next thing he saw was the UFO taking off and flying away." Silent tears were streaming down her face, as she tried desperately to hold back any threatening sobs. "Oh, Dana", Mrs. Scully said, taking her in an embrace. Scully lingered in her mother's arms, and then pulled away. "I don't know what to do. How to find him. There's really no way till they want to bring him back. Like when they abducted me. But I have to do something, I have to." She wiped her eyes, but the tears didn't seem to want to stop coming. "But that's not all. There's something else." "Dana, what more could there possibly be?", her mother questioned. "I don't quite know how to tell you this. All I can say is, I don't know how it's possible, but I'm pregnant, Mom." Mrs. Scully was speechless. "Mom, are you OK?", Scully asked, concerned. "Uh, yes, I'm fine. But Dana, how on earth...?", she trailed off. "Well, that depends on what you mean." "First I mean, who's the father?" Scully looked increasingly uncomfortable. She cleared her throat. "I'm assuming it's Mulder, Mom." "Assuming, Dana? What have you-" "Mom! Please. Don't even finish that thought, because that doesn't mean what you think." "Then what *does* it mean?" "What I'm saying is that under any normal circumstances, I would be positive that I am carrying Mulder's child. However, in light of the events of the past eight years, I am approaching the situation very cautiously. Though I am wary right now, everything appears normal. I sincerely hope that this child was conceived in a natural fashion." "But how did you conceive at all? You told me three years ago you were barren. I don't understand." "That's just it, Mom. I don't understand it either. I was just in the hospital for three days, and I've completely stumped all the doctors. I had several tests run, ultrasound, various other things. I know that I'm pregnant, my implant is gone, and there's not a single trace left of my cancer. It just disappeared." "What are you going to do though, Dana? The baby, Fox. Are you doing all right, honey?" "I'm doing the best I can. I'm just-my head's still kind of spinning from everything that's happened." "Well, I'm so glad everything is back to normal with your health", her mother said, hugging her. "But I'm so sorry about Fox. I didn't know you were, well, involved." Scully laughed slightly. "We didn't know either. I guess we just got so comfortable with each other over the years, we couldn't clearly see what was happening till recently. We've *always* cared about each other, but it ended up going much further than that." At her mother's peculiar look, she responded, "But only once. That's the really bizarre thing. I think we got a little scared after that. Things were a bit different, but we tried not to get in that situation again. We were closer, but more careful. It wasn't awkward necessarily, we just knew where to draw the line after that. But now I'm living with consequences I didn't think were possible, and I've lost Mulder. And Mom, to be perfectly honest, I don't know what to do or where to start." "You'll figure out a way, Dana. You always do. You always have. That's why I've always admired you. Your determination is unlike anything I've ever seen. You're going to get through this. I know you will." "Thank you", Scully said, trying not to cry again. "Oh, I almost forgot. You can't breathe a word of this to Bill. He'd be out here immediately, and I can't take any grief from him right now. I have enough as it is." "But Dana, he is your brother. You can't just not tell him anything." "Yes, I can, Mom. Please. Promise me you won't tell him. I'm a grown-up, a big girl, I can take care of myself. You know he hates Mulder, and he would just make things worse. Promise." "Fine. I promise, but you can't keep things a secret forever." "I know that. I just need some time to work some things out. He'll find out soon enough. God, I dread that day." Scully rubbed her temples, she was developing a headache. She hugged her mother, and kissed her on the cheek. "I really have to go", she said. "My doctor said I needed to get some rest in the next couple of days." "OK, Dana. Keep in touch and take care of yourself. If you need anything, just call me. I love you." "Alright, Mom. I love you too." She hugged her mother again, and left. ****************************************************************** On the drive home, Scully had become extremely tired. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed, which she wasn't used to. Especially not in the middle of the day. She got home and dropped everything at the door. Rummaging through a drawer, she found the journal she'd bought on her way home from the hospital. Now was the time for keeping up with things. She needed somewhere to spill all of her thoughts and feelings, keep up with her pregnancy, and to write down all the things she wanted to tell Mulder when he got home. She sighed. Mulder. All she wanted to do was bawl at the thought of him now. She hadn't seriously cried yet, but she was so tired, and so alone. Scully collapsed onto her couch as the first sobs broke free from her chest. She couldn't take the not knowing, the fear she felt about where Mulder was right now. They could return him tomorrow, or next week, or next month, or... or never. But she didn't know, and it was already killing her. She never realized how much she had always taken Mulder for granted until this very moment. He'd always been a cell phone call, or ten minute drive away. When she *was* away from him. But now... now she had to search for him alone, search for the Truth alone. She cried till she was worn out, and fell asleep curled up on the couch hoping for a few moments of peace. A few moments where Mulder's face or visions of alien ships wouldn't haunt her. To Be Continued... Title: The Scully Files: I Need You (2/3) Author: Cassandra Mulder *********************************************************************** "The Scully Files: I Need You" You're the hope that moves me To courage again, oh yeah yeah You're the love that rescues me When the cold winds rage And it's so amazing 'Cause that's just how you are And I can't turn back now Cause you've brought me too far I need you like water Like breath, like rain I need you like Mercy from Heaven's gate There's a freedom in your arms That carries me through I need you. "I Need You"- LeAnn Rimes Scully walked into the J. Edgar Hoover building only a week after being released from the hospital. It wasn't work she feared. Right now she just wanted to drown herself in work. What she feared was the feeling she would get when she got off the elevator in the basement, and opened the door to find that Mulder wasn't there with his feet propped up on the desk. But she couldn't help it. She couldn't stay home anymore, it was driving her crazy. Sleep was becoming less peaceful, and she didn't have anything else to do. If she didn't get back to routine now, she was afraid she'd lose her mind. She walked into the office, and laid her briefcase on the desk. She took a deep breath, and sat down in Mulder's usual chair. I should've stayed home, she thought, looking around. There were all the familiar things around her. The poster with the hovering UFO proclaiming "I Want To Believe". The pictures of supposed aliens and monsters, along with newspaper clippings on the bulletin board. And a picture of her and Mulder hung among the various articles. She stood up, plucked the picture of them off the board, and sat back down. She sighed. It was the two of them talking, dressed in their FBI jackets. She didn't know who had taken it, or where Mulder had gotten it, but it was all she had now. Scully put the picture aside, and began shuffling through some papers on the desk. It was all routine stuff, some of it a little much for her to take on alone. But she'd just have to work through her caseload a little at a time. She hadn't had any spells in the past couple of days, but she couldn't be too careful. There was being strong, and then there was being stupid. She had to be concerned with her child now, so she'd start out slowly. Scully glanced back over at the picture on the other side of the desk. I have to do something about finding Mulder, she thought. Just as she was about to pick up the phone to book a flight to Oregon, there was a knock on the office door. "Come in", she said, somewhat annoyed. Skinner walked through the door and closed it behind him. "Good morning, Agent Scully." "Good morning, Sir", she replied. "You're feeling better, I hope." "Yes, Sir. At the moment, I'm fine." "Glad to hear it. I didn't want to spring this on you on your first day back, Scully, but they're looking for a new partner for you." Scully looked up, stunned. "What? But Sir, Mulder hasn't even been gone for two weeks yet, they can't do that." "Scully, they can do whatever they want to, you know that better than anybody. You can lodge a complaint, but I doubt it would make a difference." "Who are they going to assign to me?" "I don't know any details yet, but I understand there are a few candidates. None of which have been dislosed to me." Scully took a deep breath, and ran her hands over her face. "Sir, they can't do it, I don't care what anybody says. I don't want a new partner. At least not... not right now. I can take care of things on my own, at least for awhile." She had a slight pleading look in her eyes, and he responded to it. "I'll see what I can do, Agent Scully. But these people are my superiors, I can't push things too far." Scully looked slightly relieved. "Thank you, Sir. I really appreciate it." "Well, I've got work to do. If you feel like you need to go home any time today, feel free." "I'll consider it, Sir. But I probably need to make things look as normal as possible around here." Skinner nodded and walked out the door. Scully shook her head. She knew he felt guilty about Mulder's disappearance. She knew he was going to treat her differently now because of that guilt. But the last thing she needed right now was to be coddled. She wouldn't stand for it. As easy as it would be to stay home and cry all day, she just couldn't do it. It would kill her, and she had important things to do. ******************************************************************** At 6 p.m., Scully entered her apartment, exhausted as usual. She wasn't having morning sickness at all, but the fatigue was about to get the best of her. She went into the bedroom, changed into some pajama pants and a T-shirt, went back to the living room, and plopped down on the couch. She flipped the TV on, just for company, and reached for the journal lying on the coffee table. Flipping to the second page, she marveled at how little she'd written. But then again, her emotions were so strong right now, she hardly knew how to put them into words. She shuffled things around until she found a pen, thought for a second, and began writing. Another exhausting day. No morning sickness yet, hopefully it will never develop. The fatigue is becoming unbearable though. I would've killed for a nap today. Who am I kidding?, she thought. Being tired is the least of my problems. She sighed and started writing again. Mulder, I miss you more than I could put into words to anyone, especially you. To put it simply, I need you. I've always needed you, but I'd never really admit it to you when you were here. I don't know how I'm going to get through this alone. I don't know where you are, or what you're doing. I'm worried about your safety, and if you'll come back to me. Tears were running down her face now. She wiped at her eyes, frustrated. It felt like she'd never stop crying. You need to be here to see our baby. I'm hoping it's a boy, and he looks just like you. You have to come back. You have to help me find out how this miracle happened. And... And I love you. You're going to know that as soon as you get back. I was so stupid to never tell you that all these years. All those times I wanted you to hold me longer than I would let you, I just always pushed you so far away. Even after that night, I still didn't say it. I regret that more than you could ever know. I saw it so clearly in your eyes, what you felt for me, and still I was a coward. She sighed. They're going to assign me a new partner, Mulder. It hasn't been two weeks yet, and they're already trying to replace you. They've already given up on you. But I haven't, Mulder. I know you'll do everything you can to get back. I feel it. I feel you all around me. I want you here so much, maybe I've become delusional. But I feel like you're still with me. I guess you always will be, in my heart. No matter what happens. You and this baby mean more to me than anything, and I need both of you here. It's so ironic that I finally get the one thing I've been longing for, and I lose you. Why is life never perfect? Why can't everything ever just fall into the right place? Is God sometimes responsible for the bad things, or does the Devil *always* do it? I know you're not really into those things, but I wouldn't have made it through a lot of things without my faith. But sometimes I wonder. I believe I've been touched by miracles before, but I need another one now. I'm so tired, I need to go to bed now. Scully felt slightly relieved to have put all that on paper. She laid the journal back down on the coffee table, flipped off the television, and even though it was still early, prepared to go to bed. As she crawled into bed and curled up under the covers, she knew that Mulder was going to read everything she wrote when he got back. She'd wasted enough time already. If she was blessed enough to get him back, she wasn't going to take him for granted anymore. ******************************************************************** Scully entered the office the next morning to find Skinner waiting for her. "Sir, is something wrong?", she asked, alarmed. "Not necessarily, Agent Scully. But you might see it that way." "What are you talking about?" "Scully, they've chosen a new partner for you." Scully's jaw dropped. "God! They certainly don't waste any time, do they?" "Apparently not. I couldn't stop it, Scully. I did everything within my power. Your new partner's a woman, but I'd still be very careful. Her name is Leigh Ransom. I don't know much about her, except for the basics. I wouldn't discount how she got here, so I again I have to warn you to deal with her in a cautious fashion." Scully dropped her briefcase on the floor and sat down. "Great", she said frustrated. "Just great. *This* is why I don't need a new partner, sir. I have enough to worry about as it is. I may already be in some kind of danger I'm not yet aware of. I don't need this at all! If anybody else finds out my secret, assuming it's still under wraps, all hell could break loose! Don't you understand that? That's why, as far as I know, you and my mother are the only people who know." "Agent Scully, calm down. You're starting to sound like Mulder." "Thank you, sir", she replied, somewhat smug. "He had more sense than the both of us put together." Skinner gave her a warning look, but didn't say anything about that remark. He did clear his throat though, and said, "Agent Ransom will be here to meet you at 1 p.m." "Well, thank you for the information, sir, but I won't be here", she said, picking up her briefcase, and walking out the door. ************************************************************************* Scully went straight home, and straight to the telephone. "Hello?", she said. "Yes, I'd like one round trip ticket to Portland, Oregon please. I'll pay for it as soon as I get there." There was a pause. "Special Agent Dana Scully, FBI. Thank you, goodbye." She hung up the phone, and went to the bedroom. Grabbing a small suitcase, she quickly gathered some clothes, and other small necessities. I wonder if I'll have a job when I get back, she thought. But maybe I don't care, not if this trip gives me the slightest clue how to find Mulder. ***************************************************************** To Be Continued... Title: "The Scully Files: When You Come Back To Me Again" (3/3) Author: Cassandra Mulder ************************************************************************************** On a prayer In a song I hear your voice And it keeps me hanging on Ahhh, raining down against the wind I'm reaching out Till we reach the circle's end When you come back to me again. "When You Come Back To Me Again"- Garth Brooks 5 months later The looks and the stares bore down on her, but Dana Scully just looked straight ahead and walked on. The questions were obvious, but no one ever asked, and she never talked about it. Her pregnancy was well past just showing, it was blatantly pronounced for everyone to see. But she didn't care what anybody thought. The only thing she was focused on at the moment was getting through the rest of her pregnancy. She had tried to hide her condition as long as possible, but under the stifling heat of summer she hadn't been able to wear layers for long. When it had come down to showing or heatstroke, she had picked showing. At least that wouldn't kill her. The last 5 months hadn't been easy. She'd had to deal with the consequences of running off for a week to Oregon. A trip that yielded absolutely nothing, and had gotten her into plenty of trouble. There had been no clues in Bellefleur, as *all* of the abductees were still missing. And even a thorough search of the woods had turned up nothing. After she returned, all she got was a tongue-lashing from Skinner and strict orders to begin working, and cooperating, with her new partner. She had almost quit, but decided against it, not wanting to lose the X-Files for Mulder. So now she did the best she could to avoid Agent Ransom, and get along with her when she couldn't. Leigh Ransom was not an unpleasant woman, much to Scully's dismay. She was tall, about 5'8", with long dark brown hair, and brown eyes. At 38, she was attractive, and didn't look her years. And right now, she made Scully feel like a cow. Fortunately this morning, Leigh, as she insisted upon being called, wasn't in the office yet. Scully needed a few minutes to herself. At nearly 8 months pregnant, she felt huge. Lowering herself into a chair, she sighed. Her mother was helping her as much as possible, but even she couldn't make her daughter's discomforts disappear. And there were plenty of them. Mrs. Scully had insisted that they meet for lunch once a week, and Scully looked forward to those meetings. It was the only time she really had anyone to talk to. They were supposed to meet at noon, and Scully couldn't wait. She was at her wit's end. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. "Come in", Scully said. It was Agent Ransom. "Good morning, Dana", she said, smiling brightly. Why is she always so happy?, Scully thought. But she managed a thin smile. "Good morning, Leigh", she replied, shuffling through some papers to make herself look busy. "How's the little one this morning?", she inquired. Scully glanced up. "Fine thanks." Obviously Leigh knew she was pregnant, but she didn't know who the father was for sure. But Scully was certain there were plenty of telling rumors going around. And she made it a point not to get too personal, the less people knew right now, the better. No matter how nice Agent Ransom was, and no matter how unsuspicious Scully tried to be of her, it was better to safe than sorry. Leigh smiled at her, looking a bit wistful. "I've always wanted children", she said. "I've just never found the right man. I'm beginning to think I never will. But apparently you did. If you don't mind my asking, who is he?" Scully tried desperately to remain blank. "It doesn't really matter now", she lied. "He's gone." Leigh immediately regretted asking the question. "Oh, I'm sorry, Dana. I really am", she said sympathetically. "It's ok, really. It's not your fault", she replied, smiling slightly. And it's not really his either, she thought to herself. *************************************************************************** Scully was relieved when noon finally rolled around. She gathered up her things, and went down to the parking garage to her car. She carefully slid behind the wheel. It was getting harder to drive by the day, but she really had no choice, there was no one else to do it for her. Scully pulled up at the little sidewalk cafe at 12:05 p.m. Her mother was already seated at a table waiting for her, but she stood up to greet her daughter as soon as she got out of the car. Mrs. Scully hugged her as best she could, and helped her into a chair. "How are you doing, dear?", she asked. Scully looked down at her increasingly large belly. "As well as can be expected for a whale, I suppose", she replied, only half joking. Her mother smiled. "I know how it feels, Dana, but I wouldn't worry about it, you look beautiful." "Well, I certainly don't feel that way." "I know, honey, but you've only got four more weeks to go. It'll be here before you know it. How's work been going?" "Slow as usual. I don't think anybody wants anyone but Mulder to investigate the X-Files." "Well, when does your maternity leave start?" "In two weeks, just in case the baby comes early or whatever. I can't wait. I'm tired of having to maneuver around that little office. And my partner...", she stopped. "What's wrong with her?", Mrs. Scully asked. "Nothing", Scully said, disdainfully. "Absolutely nothing as far as I can tell. And that's the problem. She seems harmless, but how can I possibly trust her? I just don't think it would be wise, right now especially." "Hmmm...", her mother uttered, looking worried. "Dana, you've worked with the woamn for five months now. I think you've got some serious trust issues." "Mom, can you possibly blame me? After everything that's happened in the past eight years, it's hard for me to trust anyone. You know what A.D. Skinner told me just before I left for Oregon?" "No, what did he say?" "He told me I was starting to sound like Mulder", she revealed, laughing a bit. "Well, maybe you are, but that's not necessarily a bad thing under the circumstances." "I know, that's what I think too. His paranoia has saved my life a thousand times over." "It's fine to be cautious, just don't go overboard, ok? I don't want to find you huddled up in the corner of your apartment, gun in hand. You're going to be fine." "Don't worry. I couldn't squat down on the floor to save my life. Literally." She ran a hand across her face. "Mom, I don't sleep anymore, and I can't stand it. Just lying there for hours on end is driving me crazy. I can't get comfortable for one thing, and I don't know, there's something else. I just... I guess I just expected Mulder to be back by now. *I* wasn't gone this long, so now I'm even more worried. There's nowhere to look for him, nothing else to do. I have the local PD scout those woods once a week, and they never find anything. There are people besides me whose loved ones are gone too. And there's nothing any of us can do." "I know, dear. All we can do is pray", her mother said trying to comfort her. "Oh, I have. I do, all the time. But no matter what I do, I always feel like I'm not getting anywhere." She checked her watch. "I gotta go, Mom. I'm going to be late back to work", she said, hugging her mother. "I'll talk to you later." "All right, Dana. Take care. I'm just going to finish up here, and then head home." "Ok, Mom, love you, bye." Scully got into her car, but before she could even put the key in the ignition, her cell phone rang. "Scully", she said, answering her cell as she always did. As she listened to the voice on the other end, her eyes grew wide, and her mouth dropped open. "Oh my God, that's wonderful!", she managed to get out. "I'll be right there." ************************************************************************************* Scully scrambled out of her car as fast as she could, and made her way back to where her mother was finishing up her dessert. "Dana, what's wrong?", her mother asked, startled. "Hopefully nothing anymore. Mom, they found Mulder!", she exclaimed. "I- what am I doing here? I have to go." "Do you want me to come with you, Dana? I could drive you." "Yeah, that's a good idea. Come on, let's go." They took Scully's car. "Where is he?", Mrs. Scully inquired. "Well, they found him in Oregon, and he seems to be ok, and he insisted they fly him back here", she said, desperately trying not to talk too fast. "They're taking him to a hospital as soon as they land. I'm supposed to go to Trinity Hospital." She took a deep breath. "Oh God, I'm shaking", she said, looking down at her hands. "It's just Mulder, and I'm nervous." "It's not *just* Mulder, Dana. It's the man you love, the father of your child." And then she remembered something she'd almost forgotten in all the excitement. "He doesn't know", she said, a little dazed. "About the baby, he doesn't know. What's he going to say? It's going to be quite obvious the moment he sees me." "It'll be ok, just wait and see." "Ooohhhh", Scully groaned. "How am I going to explain this? I just- ok, I can do this. Can't you go any faster, Mom?" "I'm going the limit, Dana. Please calm down." "Alright, I'm trying. I just want to get there as soon as possible." There was a small window of silence. "I wanted to take my car because it has my stuff in it", Scully finally spoke up. "The stuff I want to give to Mulder." Mrs. Scully glanced at her. "What are you talking about?", she asked. "The journals I've been keeping. There are two of them. It tells him everything that's happened since he's been gone, and... and how I feel about him. How I truly feel. He has to know now. Oh God, I'm *so* nervous!" "It'll be alright, Dana. He feels the same way about you, I know it. I've always known it", she said, squeezing Scully's hand. "I just hope they didn't hurt him. I hope he's alright. I don't know what I'll do if he's not." "They said he was. That's all we have to go on right now." Just then they pulled into the hospital parking lot. Scully got out of the car as quickly as possible, and slipped between the automatic doors. Her mom went to park the car, and then they'd meet in the lobby later. Scully made her way to the receptions desk, and asked if Mulder had arrived yet. But just then she felt as if she was being watched, and looking up, she saw Mulder standing in the second doorway straight ahead of her. ************************************************************************************** Tears filled her eyes and a smile was on her face all at the same time, as she hurried to his room. She knew he noticed nothing beneath the folds of her jacket, as he took her in his arms in that cramped, all too familiar hospital room. He held her at arm's length, and her breath caught in her throat as she looked straight into those beautiful hazel eyes. And then he kissed her. She'd dreamed of this moment for what felt like forever, and now she was in heaven feeling his arms around her, their lips together, his breath on her face. He ran his hands down her body, and slowly pulled away. Catching his breath, he looked at Scully a little oddly and said, "Scully, either you've been eating a little too much comfort food lately, or there's something you need to tell me." She gave him a playful disapproving look. Typical Mulder, she thought to herself. She laughed a bit nervously. "Actually, it's the latter, Mulder. They didn't take your sense of humor, did they? Look, before we talk about me, let's talk about you. Are you ok? Did they hurt you?" He looked fine, but she desperately needed to hear it from him. He looked like he'd been given the oppurtunity to shower and shave, and it appeared he was just a little tired. "I'm fine. I think they just wanted to study me, but for what exact purpose, I don't know. I think it may have something to do with that little surgery I had last fall, but we'll talk about that later. They treated me like a king, which is more than I can say about the others, I still don't know what became of them." She sighed. "I'm so glad they didn't hurt you, Mulder." "Now, tell me what's going on, Scully. What's happened while I was gone? How have you been? I worried about you every day, although most of the time I didn't know what day it was", he said, smiling slightly. She ran a hand along the side of his face. "Oh, you know, I've just been muddling through without you." "I didn't know Dana Scully muddled", he said matter-of- factly. "Well, she did for the last five months", she said. Mulder was really trying to concentrate on the conversation they needed to have, but he was having trouble. It seemed like an eternity since he'd been able to gaze into those big blue-green eyes. But he quickly shook his head to snap himself out of it. There would be time for all that later. "Ok, Scully. We need to talk, really." Scully took a deep breath. "I know", she said, taking his hand. "I'm just going to hold onto you here, ok? He nodded, and looked concerned. "There's pretty much no other way to say this." She took another deep breath. "I'm 8 months pregnant, Mulder." She gave him a moment to absorb that. He finally opened his mouth. "But Scully, how? I mean... I thought..." For once in his life, Fox Mulder had been stricken speechless. Scully shrugged her shoulders. "I haven't any more idea than you do, Mulder. I've had every test imaginable ran on me, only to find I'm having a baby, and that all of the signs of my abduction are gone." He still looked stunned. "And I'm...?" "Yep", she said smiling, and reading his mind as usual. "Wow, Scully. This is a big thing to come back to." Scully looked disappointed. Mulder noticed right away. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded, Scully. This is amazing! I just think it's going to take a minute to sink in." She smiled a bit at that. "I know, I shouldn't have sprung it on you like that, I guess. There was just no other way. And I've had five months to accept this, you've barely had five minutes." She hugged him tightly. "I just want to make sure you're alright. You're going to need to stay at least overnight for observation." "Will you stay?", he asked, unnecessarily using those puppy dog eyes on her. "That's a dumb question", she said laughing. "I love you." She had blurted it out, just like that. Oh God, she thought, what is he going to say? But Mulder didn't hesitate at all. "I love you too. We really screwed up and wasted a lot of time, didn't we? This should've happened a long time ago. Like after you came back. I wanted to tell you so many things that day. But there was your mother, and Melissa, and I just kept my mouth shut. Like I did every day for the following six years." "Mulder, I wasn't any better, so what's the point? We've finally gotten it together. Sort of anyway, so we're lucky to be together right *now*. We've been in so many life-threatening situations, it's a wonder we *are* here. We're together, and we're having a baby. And the main thing right now is to take care of each other, find out how we got a miracle, and figure out where you've been for the last five months, and... oh..." Scully put her hand on her forehead and leaned forward. "What's wrong?", Mulder asked, extremely concerned. "I, uh, mmmm... my vision got really blurry", she said, trying to steady herself. "I'm having some stomach pains, but it doesn't feel like contractions. I may have a form of toxemia, called preeclampsia, but it rarely comes on this suddenly. I think you'd better call a nurse." He hit the 'call' button by his bed, and slowly moved Scully from the bed to a chair. A full minute passed and nobody came. "Scully, will you be alright? I'm just going to go to the door and call someone, ok? Just try to stay upright." "Ok, Mulder, I'll be fine. Just get somebody, fast." Swallowing back his nerves, he dropped a kiss on her head, and went for the door. "Nurse!", he yelled down the hall. "Nurse! There's a pregnant woman here having problems." Two nurses a few feet down the hall heard him, and came running in. "What's going on?", one of them said. "This is Dana Scully", he said hurriedly. "She's 8 months pregnant, and she thinks she may be experiencing preeclampsia. She's a doctor." One of the nurses hurried over to Scully. "Miss Scully, we're going to get you up to the maternity ward, alright?" Scully nodded. "Get me a gurney!", she yelled to the other nurse. "Now!" ************************************************************************************** Less than a minute later the nurse was bringing in a gurney, and Mulder was helping her walk to the hall. But just as they got to it, she slumped forward. "What's going on?", Mulder asked, almost frantic. "We need to get her on the gurney right away. She's lost consciousness. Susan", she said to the other nurse, "page Dr. Fairington right away. Tell him we're bringing up an emergency case." They got Scully on the gurney, and the head nurse turned to Mulder. "Mr...?" "Mulder", he responded. "Mr. Mulder, most of her vitals seem fine right now, but we need to get her to maternity to check out the baby. Are you the father?" "Yes", he responded, although the news was still new to him. "Ok, well meet us up there, it's on the third floor." He reluctantly let go of Scully's hand. "We're going to take good care of her", she said. Then the two nurses wheeled Scully down the hall. Mulder found the nearest regular elevator, and impatiently punched the button for the third floor. As soon as he arrived at the receptions desk for maternity, he asked if Scully had been admitted. "Yes, sir", the lady at the desk answered. "Just a minute ago. The doctor will be out to see you as soon as they finish evaluating her condition." Mulder nodded, and turned to the waiting room chairs. Sitting down on the edge of a chair, he put his head in his hands. Now Mulder was not a praying man by any means, but he found himself praying for Scully and the baby's safety. They were both far too important to lose. He was interrupted by a tall man in his mid-forties, who had jet black hair and dark eyes. "Mr. Mulder?", he asked. "Yes", Mulder replied. "I'm Dr. Fairington. I just wanted to let you know what's going on. Dana's condition is not as dire as it may seem, but she has developed eclampsia, a severe form of toxemia. She has experienced one mild seizure, and we've started her on medication to prevent any more of them. We do need to take the baby by cesarean section though. Dana's vitals have calmed down a bit, so surgery can be done, and we need to start as soon as possible. I'm assuming she would be alright with you signing the consent forms?" "I, uh, yeah. Whatever needs to be done, just as long as they're both ok." "The baby's heart rate is normal right now, so that's a good sign. We just need to go ahead and deliver so that nothing else goes wrong. The baby appears to be healthy, and 32 weeks is fine for delivery. If you'll come to the desk we'll make sure you get your signature on the necessary forms." Mulder ran a hand through his hair, and took a deep breath. "Ok", he said. He'd never been so nervous in his life. He signed everything that was necessary, and turned back to the doctor. "Are you sure she's going to be alright?" "Yes, Mr. Mulder. I'm not expecting any further complications. About all we'll be watching is her blood pressure for signs of hypertension. But that's just possibility. I'm almost certain we won't be dealing with that. What she's experiencing is not uncommon, and I've handled many cases like this before. I know what I'm doing, and we'll take good care of them, ok?", he reassured Mulder, smiling. "Yeah, ok", he replied trying to think clearly. "About how long will you be?" "It shouldn't take more than a couple of hours at the most, so don't worry, Mr. Mulder. I'll be out to see you as soon as I'm done. I better get to her now." "Alright, well I'll be here", Mulder said, trying to keep the tremors out of his voice. Everything *has* to be alright, he thought to himself. *********************************************************************************** Every time I turn around When I'm lost and when I'm found Like an Angel standing guard There you are Every time I take a breath And when I forget to breathe You're watching over me There you are When I'm looking for the light In the middle of the night Searching for the brightest star There you are. "There You Are"- Martina McBride Scully slowly opened her eyes, and Mulder's concerned face came into focus. "There you are", she murmured softly. She shifted her body wait a bit, and winced at the sudden pain in her lower abdomen. "They took the baby, didn't they?", she asked him, her eyes growing misty. "Is it alright?" "Everything's fine, the baby's fine. It's a girl, Scully. Have you picked out any names?" "I had one for either situation, boy or girl. What do you think of Samantha Rianne?" "I think it's beautiful. You sure?" "I'm sure. Where is she?" "She's in the nursery right now. They're supposed to bring her in in a little while." He gently brushed the hair back from her face. "I'm sorry, Scully", he said, sighing. "Sorry for what?", she asked. "For not being here all this time. I'm sorry you had to go through what you had to alone. I don't know how I'll ever make it up to you." "But it wasn't your fault, Mulder. And I had my mother. We got through alright. But you were abducted, you didn't leave on purpose, so what could I blame you for? It happened, and you shouldn't feel guilty about it. Everything turned out alright, Samantha and I are fine, and you've been returned to us. I'm not saying it wasn't hard, or I wasn't miserable and scared without you, because I was. But that's all over now. Everything's fine", she said, taking hold of his hand. "Yeah", he said softly, "but for how long?" Scully sighed, stroking the side of his hand with her thumb. "Let's not think about anything but right now, ok?" He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Ok", he said. "So what now?" "Well, first of all, I want to see my baby", she said, smiling. "And then I want to know what painkiller I'm on, and if they have anything stronger." "Is it bad?", Mulder asked, worried. "I can handle it. I'm fine. Could you go and ask them to bring Samantha in?" "Sure thing, be right back." He was back from the nurse's station in less than 2 minutes. "They'll be here with her in a minute. She's beautiful. She got lucky, she has your nose", he said smiling. Scully laughed a bit. "Ha Ha", she said. Just then a nurse came in carrying Samantha. She had Mulder help Scully sit up a little more, and then she placed the baby in her arms. Scully's eyes filled up with tears. "Oh God, she is beautiful", she said. The newborn little girl *did* have Scully's nose, and a little round head full of fuzzy red hair. But she had Mulder's eyes and mouth. Scully was delighted at that. She was the most adorable thing she'd ever seen in her life. Scully looked up at Mulder to find that he had tears in his eyes too. She had never been happier than she was at that very moment. She had the man she loved back, and the miracle of a child she'd always wanted. As Mulder leaned down to kiss her, she could only hope all of this would last. *************************************************************************** Somewhere, not all that far away, a leggy brunette entered a dimly lit room, containing only an oxygen tank and a hospital bed. "Mulder's back in D.C., and Scully's had the baby", "Agent" Ransom informed the man in the bed. Through a thick cloud of smoke, the man replied, "Very good. Tell the others to proceed with the plans." "Yes, of course. Right away", she said, walking out and shutting the door behind her. ******************************************************************** THE END