From: Cathey Date: 4 Sep 2004 16:44:01 -0700 Subject: [all-xf] New: Senseless (1 of 1) Source: atxc Title: Senseless Author: Cathey Scully Rating: PG Spoilers: Within, The Gift, Deadalive and Three Words Category: V, A, R Keywords: Mulder/Scully Romance Summary: "This is what you were giving up, Mulder; by not confiding in me." Archive: Sure. Just drop me a line and let me know where you'd like to put it. Feedback: Please! Send it to foreverxphile@adelphia.net or CatheyScully@the-pentagon.com URL: My website can be found here http://catheysfic.tripod.com all of my fics are there, including this one. Disclaimer: I claim no ownership to Mulder, Scully, Agent Doggett, or any other characters owned by Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, and FOX. I mean no disrespect by borrowing these characters. ~ # ~ "A brain tumor." He looked up from his sulky gaze at the TV to face her. After months of feeling and seeing nothing, her anger was almost welcome. He watched her for a few minutes, watching her chest rise and fall quickly with her anger, before turning back to the TV and drawing his leg closer to himself. "An inoperable, malignant brain tumor," she continued, flapping a file ineffectively at him. He heard the thwap as it hit the strong bones of her hand. In his mind he imagined telling her everything, spilling his guts right then, but instead he stayed silent. "You didn't tell me," she murmured, and he was surprised to see she'd gotten so close without him knowing. How could she be so quiet when she was so large? "You didn't tell me, and I had to find out from Agent Doggett, a man hell-bent on discrediting you, your disappearance, and our work." He cringed at the use of Agent Doggett's name. After a short glance at her again, his head dropped back against his couch. "Why, Mulder?" she demanded, startling him by leaning into his personal space, her small hands on either side of his head, and her distinctly larger than normal body blocking his escape. He blinked, looking up at her angry eyes, the irritated set of her jaw. Her cheeks were flushed, no doubt she was livid, but he saw tears already welling in her eyes. "I don't know." "You don't know?" she looked incredulous. "You preach to me for nearly eight years about trust, and about being honest with you, and you don't even have the balls to tell me you're ill? You hand out your faith like scraps being given to stray dogs. You expect me to come to you with every ache and pain, but you have a brain tumor and you don't ever let me know?" He watched as she bit her lip, fighting her tears in an effort to remain angry and hard with him. After a few moments of glaring at him, she awkwardly stood up, smoothing a nervous hand down her top, once again drawing his eyes to the swell of her belly. "If you want someone to be angry with, Mulder, you should be angry with yourself. I'm not going to talk you out of it. But don't you dare be angry with me for picking up what pieces I could and trying to go on," she shook her head, reaching behind her and lifting the file off of the coffee table. "And don't be angry with this." She dropped the manila file into his lap and turned, moving back toward the door. He stared at the file, not moving to pick it up. "This is what you were giving up, Mulder; by not confiding in me. I just wanted you to know," she smiled sadly, all anger gone. After giving him an unhappy look, she shut the door behind her, leaving him in silence once more. After ten minutes of staring at the door, he turned; reaching up to rub his cheek and sniff away his tears. His hands moved to the file in his lap, opening it on their own accord. A soft barking, sobbing laugh burst from his throat. Scully's child was his. End Thanks to Rotem for Betaing!