From: "Lisa " Date: Fri, 15 Dec 2000 21:55:31 -0000 Subject: xfc: The Simplicity Of Dreams Source: xfc The Simplicity Of Dreams by Lisa Cole E-mail: lisa_m@angelfire.com Web Site: http://www.geocities.com/timidrose/ Archive: PLEASE! Just let me know Feedback: Yummy in my tummy! Category: V, Scully POV Rating: R Spoilers: Requiem, Within, Without, and other various little ones Summary: Dreams, unlike life, are so simple .. Disclaimer: Ha ha very funny. Not mine. Thanks: To Darkstar for always being there with an encouraging word, and a little push in the right direction. Notes: This is for the Quill And Scrol Society Challenge. Enjoy! X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~ Solid stone is just sand and water, Sand and water, and a million years gone by I will see you in the light of a thousand suns I will hear you in the sound of the waves I will know you when I come, as we all will come ~Beth Nielson Chapman, Sand And Water X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~ We are swaying in the waves of the ocean as the water laps at our bare legs and feet . You kiss away my tears, and melt away the asteroids of regret that are embedded in my skin. The stars are shiny in a black-blue sky, and the moon smiles its content and protection upon us. You wear a tuxedo. I wear a blue velvet ball room gown and a blue sapphire necklace that's heavy on my chest. You reach around my neck and gently undo the chain. You gather the beautiful mess of blue in your hands and drop it underneath us. "Let go ...Let go ...Let go ..." "Let go of what?" "The regret. There is none. I will return. I will return. I will return. I will return ..." Your mantra rings through my ears as you slowly disperse into nothing out of my arms, and I wake. ~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~ We have just made love, and are tipsy from the alcohol of love's liquid. The sweet salt of our mingled sweat still clings to our bodies. The remnants of our night of careless rendezvous lay sprawled in your apartment; my blazer, blouse and nylons, your tie and T-shirt, blazing a trail to your bed. Chocolate stains and strawberry stems lay in the bed. We lavish in the freedom of the night, as we devour the fruit, let the juice run down our chins and into each other as we kiss. We talk about all the cases we have been on these past eight years. We laugh about the vampires, goat suckers, zombies, liver eating mutants, shape-shifting men, genies, and all else we have had the pleasure to investigate. You tell me stories of your childhood with Samantha, and I tell you stories of playing ball with my brothers. We have a good time. We dance the waltz to "Hernando's Hideaway" as you swing me around, making me giggle as you tip me in your arms, taking the opportunity to nibble at the bare skin of my neck. I laugh at you, proudly sporting your alien boxers, the faces of glowing green aliens the only observers of the magic we make together. "I'm glad to hear you laugh again." "Only with you." "It's going to be awhile, you know; before I am home. You have to stay strong." "I'm so tired of being strong. It never seems to be enough." "It will be. You just wait and see ......" Again, you become one with the air. I wake alone, my hungry arms empty. ~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~ It's Christmas. We are decorating the tree in my apartment. Our child has been born. She's curious and headstrong like her father. She lays cuddled in the crook of my left arm as I use the other to string the lights. You come in from outside with a new batch of ornaments, trying to balance two boxes on one knee, and a stack of books about to fall over with the other. "Mulder! What are the books for anyway? We're supposed to be decorating." "Some classics I found while looking for the orterments. Twain, Hemingway ... I thought we could read them to Sam. Get her farther ahead than the rest of the kids," he said, snickering slightly. I scold you for being so careless, but chuckle, as I come to your rescue, only to realize as I pick up one of the boxes that I have dragged the string of lights with me, and they have found themselves wrapped around my feet. Sam, eyes wide, is eyeing the string from her position in my arm, and starts to bat at what is dangling. We both laugh as you try to untangle me, and Sam looks up in bewilderment. We end up as a mess of baby, lights and teetering books, until we finally manage to undo ourselves and gain composure. Time suddenly stops again. And I can almost feel the tug of regret and angst as I realize it is time for you to leave again. The dream descends away, leaving me in an empty white space, like the end of a Star Trek episode. "It will be this way ...Soon," I hear your lone voice whisper over the quiet, and I wake again to nothingness. ~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~ Each day, I wake with a new found hope and the strength to continue for another day. The dreams, unlike life, are a simple pleasure I look forward to every night as I crawl under your sheets and let the scent of you lull me into sleep. Days are not a simple pleasure. With each passing hour I feel my despair gain a stronger hold onto the flesh of my emotions, and your words slowly trickle out of my brain. You come to me every night to remind me, but it is a long wait between light and dark. I stood looking into my reflection that first morning, my hair and skin dripping with water and invisible tears as I tried to imagine the coming days without you. I had to build up my armor again; the armor you so diligently helped me to rid in our eight years together, but without you as my strength I have to build it again. I face Skinner, and I face Kersh. I face Agent Dogget. I am holding your legacy for you safe in my hands until you return. I am an extension of you now. I am not your friend, your partner, or your equal, but I am you. Gibson told me I was close, though I already knew I was, and I wondered that desert for what seemed like hours, calling your name. I could feel hopelessness tighten around my neck, but I was half expecting the ground to turn into the simplicity of my dreams; for you to descend from the shadows and appease me. But it was not to be. You did not descend and you did not appease me. I fell, and strange hands was there instead of yours. I cried and you did not kiss away my tears. I lay again in this bed tonight, thinking, how long? How long until the complexity of life transforms into the simplicity of dreams? But I will sleep tonight, knowing that an angel is watching.