Let's see... In total, this is an incredibly long story.  It just didn't want 
to end.  It's MSR and GC.  (That's Government Conspiracy not Gas 
Chromatography.)  Rated R, mostly for language, and a little bit of violence, 
plus a few mild sex scenes, nowhere near some of my more descriptive pieces.  
Guess I just haven't been in the mood ;-)  Now, after that moment of 
sharing... 

Thanks to Missy for editing, being a sounding board and just listening to me 
babble insanely about this thing.  The medical speak is in plain English.  Kia 
was preparing a presentation for the ACS meeting (in Orlando, the bum) and I 
didn't want to bother him with my incessant questions.  I have to save that 
for Physical Chemistry (shudder) of Organic.

Disclaimer: I know this will never happen on the TV show.  That's what fanfic 
is all about.  It's also about not owning the characters.  That privilege goes 
to Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox.  No harm intended.  Some mild third season 
spoilers apply.  The thing was too far gone, and I thought it was almost done 
by Oct 4th, so I didn't even THINK about referring to anything in the fourth 
season.  I swear the last few scenes and any similarities to new eps are pure 
cowinkidink.

After much thought, I finally broke this thing up into a series.  It's still 
not wanting to end and it's nearing the 500K mark.  So I'll be posting a part 
a week for the next four or five weeks.  If parts don't make it to your 
server, e-mail me.  Responding on the newsgroup might not make it to me for 
four or five days.  The whole series is New Beginnings.  The sections will be 
subtitled but should still be considered to be under the main title.

New Beginnings I --  Something New (1/4)
	
	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	He stared out the window with one eye and at his partner with the 
other.  She was absently pushing her food around the plastic plate and looking 
at something over his left shoulder.  Her expression was completely 
self-contained, and he knew she wasn't thinking about their current case.  She 
proved it with the first thing she said in twenty minutes.

	"Mulder, I want a baby."

	Mulder started coughing as the bite of greasy burger went down the 
wrong pipe.  Her silence gave him time to recover.  Well, enough time to start 
breathing air again instead of mystery meat products.  "Scully, what did you 
just say?"  Maybe he had heard her incorrectly.

	She turned startled eyes to look at him.  "What?"

	"Did you just tell me you wanted a baby?"

	She blushed.  "I didn't mean to say that out loud."

	"But it's true?"

	She shrugged.  "I don't know.  I just wonder sometimes how my life 
could have been different."

	Her tone was too careful.  She wasn't telling him everything.  "What's 
stopping you?"

	He wanted to smile as her eyebrow raised.  "You're kidding, right?  
What's stopping me?  How about the fact that another set of chromosomes is 
needed and I haven't even had a date in months?  How about the fact that I 
have to have my apartment swept for bugs every few weeks?  How about the fact 
that I was missing for three months and don't have a clue what was done to me 
in that time?"

	Mulder felt the familiar wave of guilt and worry at her words.  Every 
one of those reasons could be traced back to him.  "Do you really worry about 
that, Scully?"

	She frowned, but she didn't evade the topic of her abduction for once. 
 "I try not to, but it's always there in the back of my mind."

	"You could always try, couldn't you?" he asked, not really sure why he 
was doing it.  If she did try, he would have to share her with some other guy.

	"What about a father?"

	"Hey, I'll always be around."

	"Mulder, are you suggesting that we..." she couldn't finish the 
sentence.  The thought was too tempting by half.  She raised an eyebrow, like 
she did with most of his jokes.

	"Well, if you don't prefer the old fashion approach, there's always 
modern medicine."  He had no clue what the hell he was saying.  He looked down 
at the burger and wondered what new chemicals they had put in it.  He grinned 
hoping to cover his seriousness on both topics with a cocky attitude.

	"It's a possibility," she said after a moment.

	Mulder's insides twisted, making it difficult to breathe.  "Just tell 
me when, Scully.  I'll bring one of my favorite tapes to the doctor's office."

	She smirked and the matter was dropped.

		* * * * *

	At least he thought it was.  Six months later, in a similar situation, 
she did it again.

	"Mulder, I really want a baby."

	His nasal passages burned as the soda went through them.

	This time Scully had been watching him closely and had to hide her 
amusement at his response.  "Mulder?"

	He was using a napkin, trying to clean up the mess.  It wasn't 
working.  "Yeah?"

	"Did you mean it?"

	"Yeah, Scully.  I meant it."

	"A friend of mine is willing to help."  She couldn't believe she was 
suggesting this.  She tried to convince herself that they wouldn't be having 
actual sex, but the possible results would be the same.  She would be having 
Mulder's baby.

	"Scully, what about the bureau? Our - *my* enemies?"

	"We could list you as an anonymous donor."  She was nervous.  She was 
definitely nervous.  He wasn't saying anything.  She wasn't sure if he was 
even breathing.

	"When?"

	The air rushed in and out of her own lungs a few times.  "It might 
take more than once," she warned.

	He nodded.  "That's OK."

	She let go of a small smile.  "Thanks, Mulder."

	"Anytime, Scully."

		* * * * *

	He couldn't believe he had agreed to it.

	He couldn't believe she had asked.

	Oh jeez, they were going to have a baby.

	For some reason, that thought made a tape unnecessary for his present 
task.  He was no longer in a faceless room in a doctor's office; he was miles 
away and slowly removing her clothes.  The images were powerful and he could 
even see her expression as she shuddered with pleasure in his arms.  The 
knowledge of what could happen was in their eyes as he lost control and came 
inside of her.

	Reality was less satisfying and a bit embarrassing.  He hadn't been in 
the little room a full ten minutes when he emerged.

	Thankfully the nurse didn't say anything and accepted the container.

	He wasn't so lucky when he returned to the waiting room.

	"That was fast."  Scully didn't realize how that sounded until Mulder 
turned a bright red and ignored her until she was called.

	"Good luck," he said softly.

	"Thanks again, Mulder," she said and leaned down to brush a kiss 
against his cheek.

	He smiled and pretended to read until she returned.  "Well?"  He 
wasn't going to think about a part of him being inside of her right then.

	She chuckled softly.  "It'll be a couple of weeks before I know."

	"You'll tell me, won't you?"

	Her eyes were soft as she said, "I sure as hell won't be able to hide 
it, Mulder."

	He nodded sagely and held the door open for her.

	There was one detail about his "speed;" the person in the car never 
suspected a thing.

		* * * * *

	"Well?"

	"I see "hello" has been replaced as a traditional form of greeting."  
She was in a good mood as she hung up her coat.  "Well to you, too.  Is there 
any coffee for me?"

	"Scully, should you --"

	Her smile was soft as she said, "I know you changed it to decaf about 
six weeks ago, Mulder, ever since you agreed to help me out with this.  How 
are you managing mornings without regular coffee?"

	"You've been humoring me?"

	"No.  Just trying to keep you in suspense."

	"I'm dyin' here, Scully."

	"Nothing's certain yet," she warned but couldn't stop the smile from 
growing.

	She couldn't tell what he was thinking as he closed his eyes and 
lowered his head.  Then he stood up and walked over to her.  Softly, he said, 
"Congratulations."

	"Mulder, I said --"

	"I heard what you said.  Now thank me for my offering."

	"I thought I already did that a couple of weeks ago."  She was amazed 
when he blushed again.  This was fun.  "Thank you, Mulder."  There was a small 
pause and in an even softer voice she said, "To you, too."  She was rewarded 
with a shy smile that pierced her heart.

		* * * * *

	"Mulder," he said and let out a groan of disappointment as somebody 
dropped the ball.

	"It's me."

	"Hey, Scully.  What's up?" He sat back and propped his feet up on the 
coffee table, getting more comfortable.

	"Mulder..."

	He turned the TV off and dropped his feet to the floor.  "Scully, 
what's wrong?"

	"I'm just feeling a little down."

	It sounded like she was actually on the verge of tears.  "Scully?"

	"Sorry.  Just a little PMS.  Nothing a slice of Death by Chocolate 
won't cure."

	"So, I'll pick some up and a movie or two.  How's that sound?"  He was 
finding it hard to control his own disappointment.  He heard her take a breath 
and forestalled any arguments that she might think to use.  "I'll be there in 
about an hour."

	"OK, Mulder," she said finally.  "See you then."

	He gently replaced the receiver and stared at the silent instrument 
for a moment.  "Damn," he said softly and then began the search for his keys.

		* * * * *

	She hung up the phone and used a tissue to wipe her nose.  She always 
got moody, but this was a bit ridiculous.  She tried to credit her tears 
strictly to PMS, but it wasn't working.  She wasn't pregnant after all.

	Crashing after three days of euphoria was rough.

	When Mulder showed up, he brought more than chocolate and movies.  He 
also had his briefcase with several new files.

	She smiled.  They both dealt with things in the same way.  They buried 
themselves in work until they were better able to deal with what was bothering 
them.  It might not be healthy, but it worked.

	It was after eleven when he finally prepared to leave.  He gathered 
the files back into his briefcase and closed it firmly.  "So do you want to 
wait or try again soon?"

	She felt the tears threaten again, but she managed to keep them under 
control.  "Can I call you?"

	There was something in his eyes that made breathing difficult, but all 
he said was,  "Anytime, Scully."

		* * * * *

	"We're leaving?  But ..."

	"Yeah, Skinner just gave this to me.  We have an eight o'clock flight 
tomorrow to Pittsburgh."  He wasn't watching and missed it as her shoulders 
sagged and then straighten with resolve.

	"Mulder..."

	"Hmm?"

	"OK, I'll be ready."

	Something in her voice brought his head up.  "Scully?" 

	He saw the forced smile and figured out what was wrong.  "Oh, god.  
Tomorrow?"

	"Most likely.  I was going to tell you at lunch."  He opened his 
mouth, but she continued, "So are we leaving from here or are you going to 
swing by and pick me up?"

	"Scully, we can get a later flight."

	"No.  That's OK."

	"Scully --"

	She gave a small shrug and buried her nose in a report.  "Next time."

	"Scully --"

	"Next time, Mulder."

	He couldn't let this chance slip away; she might change her mind 
before the next opportunity came along.  His head started spinning with the 
possibilities.

		* * * * *

	"Mulder, why do you want to get to the airport so early?"

	"We're not going to the airport just yet.  I got us on a later 
flight."

	"So where are we going then, Mulder?"  Her heart leapt as she 
recognized where they were headed.  "Mulder?"

	"Hmm?"

	"I... Thank you."

	He just smiled and pulled the car into the parking lot of her doctor's 
office.  No one else except the doctor was there at the early hour and the 
place was eerily quiet.  Mulder was shown to the same little room from before 
and Scully was led to a different one.

	Again his fantasies proved to be more effective stimulation than the 
tapes and magazines provided.  Just the thought of impregnating her was enough 
to get him hard.  The fact that she wanted it as well nearly brought him to 
the edge.  Very little encouragement was needed to push him over it.

	He felt a vague sense of satisfaction that it took him a couple of 
minutes longer this time.  Maybe by the time he got his nerve up enough to 
suggest the more traditional way again, he wouldn't act like a fifteen year 
old his first time out.

		* * * * *

	Scully shivered as she got dressed.  She kept telling herself that it 
was just her imagination.  It wasn't possible that it was his warmth she had 
felt.  This time it had been very hard for her to detach herself from what 
Lisa had injected into her.  Her mind and her emotions swirled with different 
images the entire time she had remained motionless, giving the little guys a 
chance to reach their goal.

	Why was she doing this?  So many things could happen, or not happen.  
Why was he doing this?  She didn't want to think about that and quickly went 
onto the next question.  What would she do if she actually got pregnant?  The 
question became "What would they do?" before she could even become afraid of 
doing this by herself.

	She knew he had been almost as disappointed as she had been when she 
got her period.  And yesterday, she had almost said something that would have 
changed their lives even more than the baby she - oh, god, they- were 
planning.  Doing it this way, they weren't breaking any rules.

	Yeah.  Right.  Not breaking any rules.

	She walked into the waiting room and said, "Do we have time for 
breakfast?"

	"You buying?"

	"It's the least I could do.  There's a donut shop --"

	"Uh-huh.  I want real food."

	"Use up a lot of calories, Mulder?"

	"I always get the munchies after --"

	"There's a buffet place a couple of blocks from here," she 
interrupted.

	"Just point the way, Scully."  She hid her smile as he grinned at her 
in triumph.

	What had she gotten herself into?  What if her baby grew up with 
Mulder's sense of humor?

	She couldn't bear to think about the possibility so early in the 
morning.

		* * * * *

	She didn't let her hopes get too high this time.  She told herself it 
was just the anticipation when she didn't start on time.  

	Mulder didn't say a word either.  He didn't want to put any type of 
pressure on her about this, but he could barely contain himself.  He found it 
very difficult to act normal, to not hover, but somehow he succeeded.  He 
found it even more difficult not to imagine the tiny being that might be 
growing inside of his partner.  The tiny being he was a part of.

	The first two weeks passed like usual.  They started more cases than 
they closed and each day Mulder carefully searched her features for some kind 
of sign.  It was almost a full month after the visit to the doctor's office 
that he broke down.  "Well," he demanded.  She either knew for sure she was 
pregnant, or it was time to try again.

	Her smile was tight, and his heart started beating heavily.  "So far. 
 But --"

	"You're not getting your hopes up."

	She nodded.  "Mulder --"

	"Later.  How does pizza sound?"

	She thought about all the grease and the heavy meat he would want on 
it and felt her stomach turn.  Then she thought about how he craved salty, 
fuzzy fish on occasion and had to leave the room. 

	When she returned, she could see the worry even more clearly in his 
eyes.

	"Scully?"

	"Later.  And maybe something a little lighter for me."

	"I know just the thing.  Do you trust me to make dinner for you, 
Scully?"

	She eyed him a bit nervously.  "I don't know, Mulder.  With my life?  
Yes.  With my tastebuds?  That's asking a bit much."

	"Hey, I let you cook for me."

	"But, Mulder, I can cook."

	He made a face that made her smile.  "So my place around seven?"

	"Sure.  You want me to bring anything?"

	"Nah.  I'll have to cut out about a half an hour early to go shopping, 
though."

	"That's fine with me.  I'll just bring some of the files with me for 
you to sign then."  Her lips twitched as he groaned in disappointment.

	"You know what they say about all work, Scully."

	"And you know what they say about all play, Mulder."

	"Yeah.  OK.  So are you up to a slide show?" he asked, changing the 
subject.

	"Go ahead and start it.  Remember I cut into dead bodies for a 
living."

	She was a little amazed that she could handle the gory pictures 
presented to her, but her stomach had rebelled at the mere thought of pizza.  
The little stomach lurches were becoming more common and usually involved 
ordinary things.

	Oh, boy.  This was going to be fun.

		* * * * *

	"That was actually very good, Mulder."

	"Always the skeptic, huh, Scully?"

	"One of us has to be."

	"Scully?"  He couldn't wait any more.

	"There's been no sign of my period.  I was going to wait another week 
and then do a home pregnancy test."

	"Will you want to go to the clinic again if not?"

	"I don't know.  If it doesn't work this time..."

	"I thought you said it could take a few times."

	"Yes, but what if --"

	"None of those.  Why don't we just stick to the facts."

	"No wild jumps to improbable conclusions?"

	"Scully, you shouldn't talk like that.  I always believed you thought 
in a somewhat logical manner."

	"Oh, shut up, Mulder.  What's for dessert?"  At his horrified look, 
she said, "Come on.  Let's go for a walk and see if there's an ice cream shop 
or something."

	All of a sudden, Mulder had images of more little walks months from 
now.  Scully would be just beginning to show and be proud of it.  So would he. 
 People on the street would think he was the father.  Which he was, but no one 
they knew was going to be able to know of his pride and joy, never mind his 
love.

	But he and Scully would know.  That would be enough.


New Beginnings I -- Something New (2/4)

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	She watched the slow, steady rise and fall of his chest.  It had been 
close this time.  And it was her fault.  Now she understood some of his guilt 
trips.  She should have protected him and not doing so was something she never 
wanted to experience again.

	"Scully?"

	"I'm here, Mulder."

	"What happened?"

	"I screwed up."

	"Scully?"

	"It was my fault.  I wasn't thinking about my partner."

	"Scully, I'm OK.  The bullet just winged me."  He was a little out of 
it, but he could see she was upset.  "I'm glad you didn't try and get in front 
of me.  Because if you had, you would be the one lying here."  He felt the 
dull throb and the heaviness of the bandages high on his right thigh.  He 
thought about their height difference and where the bullet would have hit her. 
 "And we would both be worse off."  He grasped her hand in a surprisingly 
strong grip.  "I wouldn't have handled that well, Scully.  Besides, it's been 
awhile since I've been in the hospital," he said, trying to lighten her mood.

	She ignored him.  "I'm going to tell Skinner.  I'll be reassigned 
until..."

	"You'll be doing all the paperwork?  Cool."

	"Ugh.  Not cool.  Maybe I'll ask to teach."

	"You're going to leave me alone and defenseless against the miles of 
bureaucratic tape that always tries to strangle me?"

	This time it was harder to hide her smile.  The mental image was 
fairly accurate when it came time to do the expense reports.  "Not by choice. 
 But we know it's possible and if that's what Skinner decides..."

	"Will you wait until I can go with you?"

	"I don't think that would be a good idea."  Her telling the AD that 
she was pregnant with Mulder at her side would give the man the wrong idea.  
Or the right idea.

	"Yeah, you're probably right.  So how long will I be in for, copper?"

	"No more than forty eight hours."

	"Thank god for insurance companies."

	Her eyes twinkled at his tone.  "But you won't be able to go back to 
work for at least two weeks."

	He closed his eyes in despair.  "Will your mom take care of me?"

	"Nope.  Just me."

	"Not that.  Please, Scully.  I promise to behave from now on."

	"Sorry, Mulder.  But Mom's out visiting Bill and his family for the 
next week."

	"I must have been very bad in another life."  He tried his wounded 
look on her to see if it would work this time.  Nope.

	"Your track record's not too good in this one."

	"Thanks, Scully.  I think I'll go to sleep now."  He closed his eyes 
again and added a snore for good measure.

	"You're not getting rid of me that easily, Mulder.  I get to camp out 
in the other bed for the night."

	"Why don't you go home and get some rest?"

	She heard the worry in his tone and ignored it on a conscious level.  
"I want to be here."

	"OK, but I might not be the perfect host."  He gave her fingers a 
gentle squeeze.

	"I'm used to it, Mulder.  Now get some rest.  I'm going to read for 
awhile."

	"Night, Scully."

	"Night, Mulder."  She didn't bother to remove her hand from his grip. 
 She just twisted in the chair and retrieved her book.  She felt a little 
better.  He was right.  She hadn't done all she could have, but she had kept 
him from being hurt worse.  But the guilt was still there, and it would 
probably linger for quite some time.

	She had put the baby above Mulder.

		* * * * *

	"What is this about, Agent Scully?"

	She took a deep breath and plunged into the deep end.  "It's my fault 
Agent Mulder is in the hospital."

	Skinner was used to Mulder trying to take the blame for their 
injuries, but this was a new one.  "How is that, Agent Scully?"

	"My judgement was compromised by a personal situation, sir."

	"You froze?"  It happened sometimes, but it was something he never 
expected from her or Mulder.

	"No.  I limited my actions."

	"I don't understand, Scully."  He always expected one of them to get 
wounded trying to protect the other.  And from what he understood, Mulder 
could have been grievously injured instead of just hospitalized if she hadn't 
pulled him out of the line of fire.

	"If I would have been in the same situation a couple of months ago, I 
would be the one in the hospital, but I'm pregnant, sir.  I knew if I acted a 
little differently, prevented Agent Mulder from being hurt at all, the baby 
more than likely would have been injured.  I probably would have lost it."

	"Mulder knows?"

	"Yes, sir.  He does."

	He thought for a moment.  "I'll probably catch hell for this if they 
find out, but your actions are not going to be under review.  You followed 
procedure, apprehended the suspect and found conclusive evidence of his 
involvement.  Plus I was told by the other agents at the scene that the injury 
could have been much worse.  More so than the last time he was hit in the 
leg."  He watched her impassive features, but he could still see a firm 
resolve in her eyes.  "Even if you went to the review board yourself, I'm sure 
Mulder would find a way to twist all the blame unto himself, regardless of 
your decisions and testimony, and turn the whole review process into a 
circus."

	Scully didn't smile.  Mulder had told her he would put up a stink if 
she tried to get herself reprimanded.  He hadn't believed Skinner would find 
anything wrong with her actions.  Partners were expected to protect each 
other, yes, but not at the cost of their own lives if it could be avoided.

	"Agent Scully --"

	She knew what was coming next.  "Sir, to avoid any misconceptions," 
she hid her twisted amusement at the play on words.  "Agent Mulder and I do 
not, and have not had, sexual relations."

	His forehead and most of his scalp wrinkled in confusion.  "Then --" 
He stopped.  It wasn't his place to ask.

	"I really don't want this to be general knowledge, but I'm sure it 
will end up that way." She waited for his nod of agreement and played to any 
possible bugs in his office.  God, she was getting as paranoid as Mulder.  "I 
was artificially inseminated."

	He hadn't expected that one.  Maybe that she was seeing a supervisor 
in another department or that agent in the computer lab, but not artificial 
insemination.

	"Congratulations then, Agent Scully.  I take it you want to still work 
with the X-Files."

	"As long as I can, sir," she said with a nod.  "But I realize my 
involvement with them will be limited for awhile.  And I also realize I may 
have to return to Quantico when my movement becomes too hindered."

	"But not for a few months.  I'd like to see Agent Mulder when he's 
ready to return to work."

	"I'll tell him, sir."

	She stood up and headed for the door.  Skinner never actually 
dismissed them.  He just had a way that said "leave" when he was finished with 
them.  "Scully."

	She stopped and turned around.  "Sir?"  The only time he paused like 
that was if the subject was more personal.

	"He's going to have to have a partner in the field."

	"I'll try and make sure he behaves, sir, but I can't make any 
promises."

	"I guess that's all we can hope for."

	She did smile slightly as she closed the door behind her.  Now she had 
to go report to Mulder how the meeting went.

		* * * * *

	"So tell me how it went," she demanded.  He had been gone for a week 
on a case with his new partner and she was anxious to hear the details.

	"I think they've perfected the art of cloning, Scully.  She's almost 
exactly like you."

	"Except she's 5'10", green eyes, blonde hair and thin."

	"That may be true, but she doesn't hold a candle to you."

	She looked down at her protruding stomach.  "You couldn't see all of 
me with just a candle.  Mulder, this baby is going to be huge."  She was 
barely six months pregnant and already she had lost sight of her feet.

	He watched as she rubbed the mound while they walked.  "You wouldn't 
want your kid to be a munchkin, would you?"  He had missed her so much on this 
last case.  It was the first one since her disappearance that he had been on 
without her, and he had found himself talking to Terry's chest on more than 
one occasion when he thought he was going to say something to Scully.  To stop 
that potentially embarrassing situation with his taller partner, he had called 
Scully at least twice a day.  One would be about the case, and the other would 
be late at night when he couldn't sleep because he was thinking about her.  
They were spending more time together out of the office now than when they had 
been partners.  He started to wonder if he had worked so much so he could be 
near her.  He never realized how much free time he could have, and he was 
loving every second of it.

	She broke him out of his thoughts with her rueful tone.  "Right now, I 
would prefer a munchkin compared to a beanstalk."

	"Hey, I'm no --"  He bit his tongue and looked away. 

	"Mulder?"

	 "Sorry.  I try not to think like that, let alone say it, but it's 
hard, Scully.  I'm going through every bit of this with you and it almost 
feels like..."  Again he stopped, unsure if he should continue.  After all, 
she hadn't really asked him for anything other than his sperm when it came to 
the baby.

	"I know, Mulder."  She understood his confusion.  She was feeling the 
same things when it came to him.  She didn't know when she had gone from 
regarding him as a friend to looking at him as the father of her child.  A man 
that would be there for them both.  "Me, too," she said softly to reassure 
him, to let him know he wasn't alone.  

	Suddenly she stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and reached for his 
hand.  "Feel this," she ordered and pressed his palm firmly against her 
stomach.

	He felt the tiny nudging sensation and stared in awe.  "Oh, my god.  
He's moving.  I can feel him moving."

	"He, Mulder?"

	He didn't hear the question.  He was too absorbed in the experience of 
feeling his child move for the first time.

	It was several minutes later before he recovered enough to respond, 
"Did you say something, Scully?"

	She shook her head and started walking again.  Mulder caught up in two 
strides and took his customary place at her side, their arms brushing every 
couple of steps.

		* * * * *

	They turned the next corner, heading back to her place.  As she 
thought, she chewed on her lip.  Should she ask him?  Now was as good as time 
as any, and she really had no desire for it to be anyone else.  She took a 
deep breath.  "Mulder, would you be my Lamaze coach?"

	"You don't have to ask, Scully." His heart leapt. He wanted to be with 
her for every second he could.  "I would love to."

	"I did have to ask.  I don't want to take you for granted."

	"Scully, I've been thinking..."  He couldn't believe it.  He was 
actually going to do it.  After all the time they had spent together in the 
past seven months, he finally mustered the courage to do it.

	"Mulder --"

	"No.  Please.  Hear me out."  He waited until she nodded.  "Scully, 
maybe we should... No.  Scully.... No.  Dana, will you marry me?"

	"Mulder --"

	"It's not just because of the baby," he assured her.  "I've been 
thinking about this for a long time.  Years."  He stopped in the middle of the 
sidewalk and stood in front of her.  "I...God, this is hard.  I love you and I 
want us to be together."  The last was said in a rush that she almost couldn't 
hear.

	Her head fell forward and she stepped closer to him.  His arms came up 
and lightly rested on her shoulders.  "Mulder.  I want that too.  But..."  His 
hands tightened and his heart stopped beating.  "But what about everything 
we've said before?  It will be even more dangerous."

	/She's not saying no!/ something inside of him shouted, and he started 
to breathe again.  "I can leave the X-Files."

	"We, Mulder.  And Samantha?"

	"I can still look for her, Scully.  I'll probably get into less 
trouble, too."

	"I don't know, Mulder.  You would be giving up so much."

	"No more than you."  She still wasn't saying no.  She was just stating 
arguments that he already had considered.  "I have just one question."  He 
paused trying to find the courage for one more sentence.  "Do you love me?"

	"Yes," she said without hesitation.

	His face hurt from the smile that formed.  "I wondered about that.  
OK, now for the next obstacle.  We're having a baby.  I've asked you to marry 
me.  I've told you I love you.  You love me.  Now, can I kiss you?"

	"Leave it to us to do everything completely backwards.  Come here, 
Mulder."

	He leaned down and gently covered her lips for the first time.  His 
arms tightened around her and pulled her a little closer.  She was soft and 
sweet and melting in his arms.  He felt her lips part and she started to 
nibble on his bottom lip.  He gasped and surged his tongue into her warm, 
receptive mouth.  He pulled back a moment later at the feel of something 
familiar but also completely unusual, considering the circumstances.

	"He's jealous."

	"Huh?"

	"I think the kid is protesting."  He placed his hand on the spot that 
was moving.

	"No.  I think he may be jumping for joy."

	"Cool."

	"Yeah.  Come on.  I'm hungry."

	"I think you're just using the baby as an excuse to eat."

	"Now that you've discovered my plan, I'll have to kill you."

	He laughed and led the way down the next block.  They took a few steps 
and then Mulder grabbed her hand.  He smiled when she linked their fingers 
together.

		* * * * *

	"Mulder, why don't you do more than just kiss me?"

	He carefully pulled her down onto the couch next to him.  "Because I 
thought you didn't want me to, that we were moving too fast."

	"We been moving towards this for years, so it's not all that fast."  
She paused to gather herself.  "I know I've been sending mixed signals the 
past couple of weeks."  She buried her head in his shoulder.  "It's just... 
well... I'm huge," she said finally.

	"You're beautiful.  And if you want to take things a step further, I'm 
all for it."

	She smiled at his eager tone.  "I want to take things a step further." 
 She stretched to reach his lips and moved her hand down his chest to his 
belt.

	He pulled back after several minutes.  "Scully, oh, god, Scully.  What 
are you doing?"

	"Taking things a step further," she said against his neck.

	He shifted against her hand, nestling his hardness into her palm.  
"You'd better stop."

	"I don't want to."  The zipper on his jeans was slowly lowered.

	"Scully... Oh, god, Dana."  His eyes closed and his back arched.  He 
reached down to remove her hand.

	"No.  Let me do this."  She moved off the couch and onto the floor.

	He wanted to stop her.  He didn't want this for them the first time, 
not hot and frenzied.  He wanted to take things slowly, do it right, but his 
body wasn't listening to him.  He felt her warm, moist breath and then her 
hot, wet mouth.  A strangled groan escaped his control and echoed through the 
room.  "Oh, Christ.  Dana."

	She didn't answer.  She was too busy exploring and tasting what she 
had yet to experience outside of the doctor's (non-sterile) office.  She 
wanted to feel his hardness inside of her, but she wasn't comfortable with her 
body at this time, especially with the newness of the situation.  She was more 
than comfortable with what she was doing though, even if Mulder seemed to be 
in pain because of it.

	His breathing was harsh and his body was tense.  She took in every 
millisecond of it and tried to push him over the edge.  It wasn't long before 
she succeeded.

	His soundless shout in the shape of her name filled her with joy.  She 
took a moment to savor his languid body sprawled listlessly on her couch.  
After a minute or two, she gently redid his pants and sat down next to him.

	He found the strength to pull her into his arms and buried his face in 
her hair.  "Were you trying to give me a heartattack?" he asked when he found 
a portion of his voice.

	"Maybe."  She covered his hand as it moved up her side and hovered 
near her breast.  "Mulder?"

	"Will you let me return your affections?"  The string of tiny kisses 
moving across her jaw distracted her from his words.

	"Mulder..."

	He heard the worry and uncertainty.  "We'll take this only as far as 
you're comfortable with.  The rest we'll save until we're married."

	She let a small laugh loose.  "Our only concession to a traditional 
time line?"  She didn't -couldn't stop the hand that finally covered her 
breast.  It felt so incredibly good that it was almost painful.

	His hand was strong and gentle as it massaged her swollen flesh.  Her 
nipple puckered instantly into a tight bud, bringing a gasp to her lips.  His 
hands worked surely to unbutton her top and remove her bra.

	She tried to keep her eyes closed so she wouldn't have to see his 
reaction to the huge mound of her stomach but failed when his lips surrounded 
the enlarged peak of one of her breasts.  Her fingers clenched in his hair and 
she arched into his embrace.  In a daze, she felt his hand move along the 
inside of her thighs and shifted against the couch.  He covered her mouth with 
his and his tongue teased her in the same manner that his hand did through her 
pants.  She somehow managed to help remove them and then cried out as his 
fingers found her bare flesh.

	He felt himself get hard again and his breathing grew ragged.  She was 
so incredibly beautiful, more so than he had ever imagined.  She wanted him, 
he could see that, feel it, smell it, but he knew she still had some 
reservations.  So he held back and managed to control himself as he sought 
what pleased her the most.  He didn't want to risk hurting her or the baby, 
but he needed to see her like this.

	She heard his whispered words of love through a dense haze.  She had 
to see his eyes, to read the truth of his statements in his gorgeous eyes.  
She fought to open hers and gasped at the fire she saw in his.  She cried out 
his name as his fingers and lips brought her to an incredible climax.

	There was no way the two of them could fit on the couch with the size 
of the child they had created lying between them.  So Mulder sat on the couch 
and pulled her back across his lap, draping the blanket from the back of the 
couch around them.  He listened as her breathing returned to normal and tried 
to regain control of his own.  Several minutes passed before he became 
satisfied with his efforts and he felt some of the tension leave him.

	It was even later before he broke the silence that surrounded them.  
"So can I stay the night?"  His lightly caressing hands said it wouldn't be to 
sleep on the couch like he had done in the past.

	"I'll think about it," she said around a yawn.  "Remind me to give you 
an answer in the morning."

	He chuckled slightly as she drifted into sleep.

		* * end * *
New Beginnings I -- Something New (3/4)

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	The demands of her bladder woke her up.  It took her a second to 
remember where she was and what was different about her situation.

	Mulder.

	He had been trying to get her to let him move in with her for almost a 
month.  And he was succeeding one night at a time.

	She fought her way out of the bed and into the bathroom.  When she 
returned, Mulder was awake.

	"You OK?"

	"I'm fine.  Junior is just taking up more room than he was first 
allotted."

	He pulled her into his arms as she laid down and started rubbing her 
stomach.  "Just a few more days."

	"If I get much bigger, they'll have to use a crane to get me into the 
delivery room."

	"Are you sure it's not twins?"

	"With the way I feel right now, it may even be triplets."

	He suddenly had a nightmare vision involving himself and three babies 
that needed diapering and feeding all at the same time.  "I don't think we 
should joke about that anymore."  He smiled as she laughed and faded off into 
sleep.

		* * * * *

	"Sir, I would prefer not to leave town at this particular time."

	"Why not, Agent Mulder?"

	"Well, Scully's due any second now, and I'm her coach." 

	He and Scully had talked about turning in their resignations, but then 
they decided to wait and see how things went.  If necessary, he would quit 
right now.  There was no way was he going to leave town at this time.

	"I see.  Fine.  I'll send someone else on the case."  Mulder stood up 
at the silent command to leave.  "Agent Mulder."

	/Oh, shit.  This is going to be a personal question./  "Yes, sir?" he 
asked tensely.

	"Is it true Agent Scully was artificially inseminated?"

	He nodded.  "I drove her to the clinic."  He waited a second.  "Have 
there been suggestions to the contrary?"  Even though they weren't partners 
anymore, there could still be trouble career-wise if the Bureau didn't believe 
that.

	"None that matter.  That will be all, Agent Mulder."

	He closed the door softly behind him.  They were really walking a fine 
line of technicalities.

	But then again, they always did.

		* * * * *

	"Hi, honey.  I'm home."  When there wasn't an answer to his Ricky 
Ricardo voice, Mulder started to panic.  "Scully?"  He set the briefcase down 
and checked the apartment.  There was no sign of her.  Maybe she was just out 
shopping with her mother.  It was more than possible.  He and Scully had been 
OD'ing on baby purchases the closer it got to the her due date.

	He gave her a half an hour before he dialed her cellular.  "Scully," 
she said after three rings.

	"Hi.  It's me.  Where are you?"

	"Mom drug me out shopping, said I had to get out of the house."  He 
heard the snort of disbelief in the background and laughed.  He knew she had 
been going stir crazy since she went on maternity leave a week and a half ago.

	"You were bored again, weren't you."

	"It's not my fault I can't reach past my stomach nowadays and can't 
work."

	"Are you going to blame me for this?  As I recall, it was your idea.  
I had nothing to do with it."

	He grinned at the full bodied laugh he could hear.  "Are you at the 
office?" she asked around a chuckle. 

	"No.  I'm at home.  I can have dinner ready by the time you get back."

	"Mom says she's treating and you're invited.  We can be at your place 
in an hour."

	"That's fine, but I'm at your place."

	"I wasn't there and you didn't panic?"

	"Just a little bit.  Then I actually thought things through."

	"Mulder --"

	"Yeah?"

	"Later," she said.

	"Later, to you too."  He smiled and hung up the phone.  "Later" in 
that tone translated to "I love you" in the recent months.  They were still 
being careful with appearances.  He didn't want to jeopardize her or the baby 
by letting certain things be known yet.

		* * * * *

	"You're joking, right, Mulder?  You actually dealt with a hundred year 
old, liver-eating, mutant?"

	"Not a joke.  Tooms would eat the livers of five people and then 
hibernate for thirty years."

	"Did he serve it with some fava beans and a nice Chianti?"

	"Ha.  Ha.  Wrong serial killer.  Now as I was saying - Hey, Scully."

	She smiled at the eager tone she heard in his voice.  "Hi, Mulder.  
Just thought I'd drop by as long as my ID's still valid."  She cautiously 
lowered herself into the plastic chair in the cafeteria.  "Hi, Terry," she 
said to the woman seated at the table as well.

	"Hello, Dana.  Mulder was just telling me about somebody named Tooms 
and your first encounter with little GREY men."

	Scully smiled at the slight emphasis on color.  Mulder must have gone 
into lecture mode recently.  "Please tell me you don't believe everything he's 
said."

	"Not a word.  You put up with him for how long?"

	"It seems like centuries sometimes."

	Mulder didn't take exception to her statements.  She had said 
something similar last night but under completely different circumstances.

	Theresa Armstrong watched as they mentally touched each other.  There 
was something really unusual about their relationship.  They were close and 
more than just partners.  But it wasn't quite the closeness of longtime 
lovers, nor was it the sappiness of new ones either.  She mentally shook her 
head and put her speculations in the back of her mind.  She didn't want to 
waste the energy to figure out something that really wasn't any of her 
business.  Besides, judging by the gossip she had heard, they had been under a 
microscope for years and deserved some peace.

	The rest of their lunch was spent in wary companionship.  Scully was 
still feeling a mixture of relief and uneasiness around Mulder's new partner. 
 She knew most of her insecurities were stemming from hormones and her 
pregnancy, but it was still difficult not to feel challenged professionally 
and personally.  She was reassured by Mulder's actions though.  He didn't 
communicate with Terry the same way he did with her.  He didn't lean in close 
and there wasn't any of his normal teasing tones.  There wasn't anything in 
his actions beyond professional courtesy.

	She felt worlds better when she left for her meeting with Skinner.  
They were supposed to talk about her assignment when she returned from 
maternity leave.  She still didn't know if she would want to teach at Quantico 
or not after the baby.  But that was the most likely assignment.  She did know 
that she would not be returning to the X-Files.  She had known that as soon as 
she started thinking about the possibility of a baby.

	She wasn't sure if she was letting them win by leaving.  Was she being 
forced out to insure the safety of her child?  Or would she have left the 
field if their situation had been a bit more normal?  She thought about that 
and realized she would still have left.  Having both parents in the field 
would have been asking for trouble, even without the smoking man and his 
conspiracies.

	She tried to distract herself from the persistent aches and pains of 
carrying twenty five extra pounds of wiggling mass around.  The past couple of 
days the mass had gotten larger, but the movement had lessened.  She began to 
suspect her labor would start soon, and the cleaning frenzy she was 
experiencing was another clue.  "The Nesting Instinct."  Yeah.  Right.  It was 
the need to move freely again, not some primitive need to create a nest for 
the little one.

	She found a small measure of amusement in Skinner's reaction to her 
size when she stepped into his inner office.  The poor man's eyes bulged and 
he looked like he expected her to go into labor right then.

	"Mulder wasn't lying."

	"Sir?"

	"He asked not to leave town on a case because you're due soon.  I 
thought he may have exaggerated."

	"No.  Mulder was painfully accurate in his statement, sir."  She 
smiled and placed her hand on her stomach.  If anything, she was overdue.  She 
gritted her teeth as a tight band wound its way around her back and across her 
stomach, then she ignored it.  The twinges were becoming common place.  
Cautiously, she sat down.  "Sir, about my assignment after I return --"

	"I've been thinking about that.  I don't know how to put this without 
it sounding like discrimination, Agent Scully.  But this is just a personal 
suggestion and you have permission to tell me where to shove it."

	She smiled.  "I'll save you the possible embarrassment and legal 
reprimands, sir.  I think it would be best if I didn't return to the field 
after the baby."

	She saw his shoulders relax just a little in relief.  "It's not --"

	"I understand.  But the two most important people in this baby's life 
shouldn't be in constant danger."

	"Scully, it's really none of my business, but has your relationship 
with Mulder changed?"  He was asking because he had noticed the change in 
Mulder and there was only one possible scenario he could think of to explain 
it.

	"About two months ago, sir," she said with a nod.

	Skinner shook his head and mumbled, "It took you two long enough."

	"Sir?"

	"Nothing, Agent Scully.  Quantico is looking forward to having you 
teach again."

	"Thank you, sir.  Not to change the subject, but could you call Mulder 
up here?"

	"Agent Scully?"

	She gritted her teeth again and clutched the arm of the chair as a 
tidal wave of pain enveloped her.  It wasn't an uncomfortable twinge this 
time.  No.  It hurt like hell.  "He was headed back to his office when I last 
saw him," she provided in a tense voice.

		* * * * *

	Mulder had no clue why Skinner had called him up to his office.  He 
thought he had succeeded in keeping himself out of trouble recently.  
Apparently not.

	When he saw Scully still in Skinner's office he relaxed a little.  
Unless she had spilled her guts at this late date, he still didn't know why he 
had been called.  He went over to help as Scully struggled to get out of the 
low chair.  She really didn't like her loss of movement, but he didn't mind.  
It gave him an excuse to touch her almost constantly.

	"Scully?"  He could see something wasn't right.  She was too tense.  
"Sir, what's going on?"

	"Don't panic --"

	Before she could say anything more, he panicked.  "Oh, god.  The baby. 
 It's too soon.  You're not due for two more days.  Let's get you --"

	"Mulder.  Calm down.  There's plenty of time and it's not too soon.  
Sir, if you'll excuse us?"

	"Go right ahead, Agent Scully."  He sure as hell didn't want her 
having the baby in his office.  "If you will let me know, I would like to 
visit."

	"Yes, sir.  Come on, Scully.  My car's in the garage.  Where's my 
phone?  You call your doctor and I'll get your mother.  Shit, what's her 
number, Scully?..." 

	Skinner shook his head as Mulder's panicked voice faded down the hall. 
 Scully was going to have her hands full with Mulder and a baby.

	"Mulder, could you slow down?" she called.

	He stopped dead in his tracks and looked behind him.  She was more 
than halfway down the hall from him.  He was so used to her keeping up with 
him, it was almost a shock to realize she hadn't been able to. 

	 "Mulder.  There really is plenty of time.  This is a first baby and 
they always take a long time."  She was trying to reassure him and managed to 
worry herself.  The pains were sharp and distinct and not very far apart, 
considering she had just became aware of them.  Twenty to twenty five minutes 
and she had only just started.  "We need to stop by my apartment.  I have to 
get my things."

	"Scully."

	"Mulder, take me to the apartment or I go by myself."

	When he pulled up to her apartment, she got out of the car before he 
could even stop the engine.  He started cussing up a blue streak and followed 
her.  When she sat down on the couch and turned the TV on, he started to 
really get worried.  "Scully, come on.  We have to get to the hospital.  
There's no way I'm going to deliver the baby by myself."

	"You won't have to, Mulder.  But until the pains are five minutes 
apart, they'll just treat us like idiots there."

	"Then why did you call me up to Skinner's office?  Just so I could go 
crazy for the next few hours?"

	"Well, I was hoping you would help me keep my cool.  This is my first 
baby, you know."

	That stopped the majority of his panicking.  "Are we crazy, Scully?" 
he asked as he sat down next to her.

	"Certifiable," she agreed.

	"This may not be the best time to bring this up, but I need the 
distraction."

	"What is it, Mulder?"

	"I think I want to go back to school.  Get my Ph.D."

	"You want to teach?"

	"No.  And I don't want to practice either."

	"Then what?"  He was right.  The conversation was distracting.

	"Maybe do profiles for a living."

	"I thought you didn't like that.  And you wouldn't need the degree 
with your experience."

	"I think I'd like to write, too."

	She was amazed at how unsure he sounded.  "Let's see.  You stay home 
all day to write.  No babysitters and someone's always at home for the kids.  
I think I like this idea, Mulder.  Fiction or non-fiction?"

	"Both."

	She smiled at his eagerness.  "Just not articles for The Lone Gunman. 
 That's all I ask."

	"OK, that's settled.  Now the next topic.  When are we going to get 
married?"

	"How about now?" she suggested in her best deadpan.

	"What?!"

	"How about right now?" she repeated.

	"Scully, did you forget you're in labor?" She thought he sounded like 
she did when she was using her most logical tone on him.

	She snorted.  "No."

	"What about your mother?  And a license?"

	OK, so maybe she wasn't thinking that clearly.  "You're right.  Maybe 
in a couple of weeks then?"

	"How about the day the doctor gives us the OK for the honeymoon?"

	"Honeymoon.  Now there's a thought," she said and moved to kiss him.

	"Scully, what are you doing?"  He sounded afraid.  Very afraid.

	"Trying to distract you.  Do you think it'll work?"

	"No."

	"Let's test that theory, Agent Mulder."

	"Shit."

		* * * * *

	"I can't believe you did that," he said again, still in shock.

	"Well, it did help pass the time."

	"It nearly killed me.  How are you doing?" Her hair was damp and his 
hand was cramped from her strong grip.

	"Eight and a half centimeters.  Hopefully it won't be too much 
longer."

	He couldn't agree more.  "I could always do something to distract 
you."

	"Like what, Mulder?"  She was afraid.  She was very afraid.

	"Well there were some inconsistencies in an autopsy recently."

	"What kind of inconsistencies?"  He was right.  It did help to 
distract her.

		* * * * *

	"Come on, Dana.  One more push.  One more push and your baby'll be 
here," the doctor lied with ease.

	"Mulder, why did I do this?" she asked between clenched teeth.

	"I still can't figure that one out, Scully," he said as he shook his 
head.

	"Why did you let me do this?"

	He could answer that one.  He leaned down to whisper in her ear.  "I 
wanted you to have my baby.  I wanted it so bad and it's one more link we'll 
have."

	"Shit.  This hurts, Mulder."

	"One more push.  That's it, Dana, and he'll be here."  He couldn't 
look at the mirror that was set up.  She was so small and the baby promised to 
be huge.

	His heart missed several beats as she bellowed.  He wanted to scream 
with her, but he was pretty much frozen in place.

	"Yep.  It's a boy."

	Scully fell back in an exhausted slump.  She managed a smile as Mulder 
declined to cut the cord, but that was it.  "Shoot me if I ever suggest 
something like this again."  She didn't even notice as the doctor collected 
the placenta and stitched her up.

	"Don't worry.  I will."  He accepted the bundle that was passed to him 
after it was cleaned up and stared at the baby in awe.

	She watched his eyes widen and then close.  She felt a similar sense 
of otherworldliness and extended her arms.  She did notice Mulder's reluctance 
to give up the baby and smiled again.  As she held her son in her arms, Mulder 
kept one hand on her shoulder and the other traced the fine, dark hair 
covering the baby's head.

	"Scully?"

	"Yeah?"

	"He's absolutely ugly.  Must take after his father."

	"I think he's beautiful, Mulder.  He definitely must take after his 
father."

	Dr. Lisa Howard looked at the family in front of her.  She had no clue 
why Dana had come to her for help getting pregnant.  Fertility hadn't been a 
problem, nor had she lacked a suitable candidate for a father.  She had 
brought her own.  Maybe one day Dana would explain it.  But right now it was 
enough to see the new life in her friend's eyes and arms.

	One of the nurses took the baby and promised to return him after the 
rest of the paperwork was finished.  Dana very reluctantly let the baby go and 
looked at Mulder.  "Keep an eye on him."

	He kissed her forehead and said, "I will.  We'll see you in a few 
minutes."

	No one tried to stop him from hovering.  He suspected Scully's doctor 
had something to do with it and was grateful.  Lisa knew some of Dana's 
worries about the baby, but not all of them.  One of which was that their 
enemies would come after them.

	The baby only left his sights for a couple of seconds, but it was 
enough to increase his blood pressure.  When the nurse returned, the scrunched 
up, sleepy features were the same and he calmed down again.  He followed the 
nurse as she brought the baby to Scully's room and smiled at Mrs. Scully.

	Maggie watched her daughter and grandson and the man hovering over 
both of them.  She knew Dana had chosen a medical procedure to get pregnant, 
but she could also tell who the donor had been.  "I think he's going to look 
like his father."  She could tell by their startled expressions that they 
hadn't thought about that possibility.  She patiently waited until her 
daughter grew tired and then said, "May I hold him now?"

	Scully nodded and let her mother take the baby from her arms.  Mulder 
smiled and moved to sit carefully on the bed by her feet.  "You could call 
Skinner, Mulder."

	"Do I have to?"

	"You said you would."

	"I was panicking at the time."

	"Mulder."

	"OK.  I'll do it."

	Her eyes closed and she finally fell into an exhausted sleep.  She 
woke up periodically to see Mulder or her mother pretty much standing guard 
over the baby.  At one point, Skinner was even there.  The small reassurance 
let her find some much needed rest.

	It was a short twenty-four hours later when she was being released.  
And they were both more than happy about it.  Mulder for one was glad because 
he could keep a better eye on both Scully and the baby.  He buckled Joshua 
William into the carseat and glared at Scully as she got out of the wheelchair 
and into the front seat without his help.

	"Let's just get home, Mulder," she said and settled into the seat.

	He waited until she was comfortably ensconced in the bedroom before he 
brought the subject up.  "Scully."

	"Hmm?"  Joshua was almost done feeding and she was getting sleepy 
again.

	"I saw the birth certificate."

	She looked at the very tense man sitting by her hip.  "Are you upset?"

	"I'm worried."

	She reached for his hand with her free one.  "Mulder, if we are being 
watched, they know or at least strongly suspect, and it would take little to 
confirm their suspicions."

	"But maybe the pretense could keep you safe."  He trailed his fingers 
along his son's tiny features.

	"I'm willing to risk it, Mulder.  Even without your name on the birth 
certificate, the wedding in a couple of weeks would have us in the same 
situation.  We're a family now, Mulder.  We can draw strength from that or let 
them use it against us."

	"I love you."

	"I love you, too."  She wasn't sure if she had succeeded in lifting 
his mood any, but he did smile.  "Now will you look after your son for awhile, 
so I can get some sleep?"

	"You think it's too soon to introduce him to such lofty reading as the 
Adult Video News?"

	"Maybe next week, Mulder."

	"Sleep tight, Scully."

	"Until he gets hungry again.  God, Mulder, he eats like you do," she 
said around a yawn and moved down on the bed.  She was asleep almost instantly 
and missed the leer that entered his eyes.

	Mulder watched her for several minutes, his son firmly held in his 
arms.  "Well, kiddo, let's go see what kind of trouble we can get into while 
Mommy's out of it."  He smiled as Joshua squinted at him, let out a big yawn, 
and promptly fell asleep.  "I think you two have the right idea," he whispered 
and laid the baby on the bed.  Soon after, he crawled in under the blankets 
and had the best two hour nap he could ever remember.

		* * end * *


New Beginnings I -- Something New (4/4)

	By Nicole Mason (mason@umr.edu)
	4/96-10/96 (forever, whew!)

	It was an exhausting week before Mulder returned to work.  Every 
Scully relative imaginable had shown up at the apartment and oohed and aahed 
over the baby.  They barely had a minute to themselves and absolutely no time 
with the baby.  At least Scully got to feed him without many interruptions.  
Mulder didn't even get diaper duty, but he wasn't complaining on that score.  
There were so many people in and out of the apartment those first days that he 
didn't even notice her the first few minutes she was there.  Apparently, 
Scully had called his mother and she came for a visit, although she didn't 
stay long.  Things were still tense between the two of them, and she didn't 
understand why her son hadn't told her months ago about her grandson.  Scully 
told everyone about the wedding reception they would like to have in a couple 
of months and Maggie enveloped Mulder in a hug he could still feel.

	Now he just had to face Skinner again and turn in his resignation.  He 
was hoping he would still be able to do some consulting, but he wasn't 
counting on it.  He had not exactly made a lot of friends in recent years.  
The rest of the agents would probably throw a party when they found out he was 
leaving.  It wasn't a comforting thought.

	There were a few inquiries about Scully and the baby, but no one had 
made the connection to him yet.  Which was amazing considering the rumors 
about them while they had been partners.  He made his way down to the basement 
and tried to brace himself for the stack of paperwork he knew awaited him.  He 
spent the next couple of hours trying to concentrate on work until it was time 
for his meeting with Skinner.  It was difficult, though.  He kept reaching for 
the telephone to call Scully and see how she and Josh were doing.

	The knot of dread in his stomach moved to his throat as he realized it 
was time for his meeting.   /Just make it short and to the point/ he ordered 
himself.  It wouldn't have to be drawn out for hours.  He accepted the card 
and gift for Scully from Skinner's assistant and took a deep breath before he 
opened the door.  He was doing something he wanted, but he was still leaving 
something he loved.

	Before Skinner could even tell him to sit down, Mulder withdrew an 
envelope from his jacket and handed it to Skinner.  "Sir, I'd like to hand in 
my resignation."

	He accepted it without a word and motioned for Mulder to take a seat. 
 Mulder watched as Skinner read through the carefully worded paragraphs 
without betraying any reaction.

	"You've been thinking about this for some time, haven't you, Mulder?"

	"Yes, sir.  I have."

	"May I ask what prompted this?"

	"A combination of things, but you are aware of the main reasons."

	Skinner pictured the few moments he had watched Mulder with the baby 
while Mulder was unaware of his scrutiny.  Yes, he was aware of Mulder's 
reasons.

	"Mulder, I know that you'll still search for your sister..."

	"Yes, sir.  And I know that my resources will be limited as well as my 
course of action.  But this is something I have to do."

	"So what are you going to do, Mulder?"

	"Consult on profiles occasionally.  Go back to school.  Write.  Take 
care of the baby."  Each sentence was accompanied by a shrug.  Except for the 
last one.  Skinner was shocked by the transformation of Mulder's features with 
the smile that formed on the last sentence.

	It was probably a good thing Mulder was leaving the X-Files.  Skinner 
didn't see having a family as a weakness.  But when you cared deeply for 
something, it could always be used against you.  He knew that from experience. 
 And he also knew that pushing those that you cared about away could cause 
more pain than worrying about their safety because of your actions.

	"So how much time are you giving us?"

	"Three, maybe four weeks, sir.  I can't stay beyond that."  He didn't 
add that the wedding was going to be soon after he left the Bureau and right 
before Scully started back at Quantico.  They had decided that she would stay 
with teaching until he finished school.  Beyond that, they weren't sure.

	Skinner nodded.  "I'll start the paperwork."  Mulder stood to leave 
and Skinner said one more thing.  "Congratulations, Fox."

	Mulder smiled, not at all upset by the use of his first name.  "Thank 
you, sir."  He softly closed the door behind him and went back down to the 
basement.

	Several packages were outside his office and addressed to Scully.  He 
picked them up and took them inside.  From somewhere he extracted a bag and 
began to load up the presents.  By the time the day ended, there were more 
gifts than he could carry.  The last person to stop by actually offered to 
help take them to his car.  Between the two of them, they managed to haul the 
entire lot out to the car in one trip.  He carefully closed the trunk, thanked 
Agent Pendrell, and headed home to his family.

		* * * * *

	"Mulder, what is all this stuff?  Did you go shopping again?"

	"Nope.  These are from people in the Bureau."

	She looked up from her inspection of the bags in surprise.  When he 
turned and walked back out the door, she called, "There's more?"

	Her answer came several minutes later when he returned.  "That's it," 
he said as he set more bags full of gifts on the coffee table.  "I thought 
everybody treated you like Mrs. Spooky."

	"Stop whining, Mulder, and help me open these.  Remember to keep the 
card with the gift, so we can send thank you notes."

	"No.  They're for you.  I'll just sit here and play with Josh."  He 
picked the sleeping baby up and held him while Scully started opening the 
gifts.

	She frowned but knew it would be useless to argue.  She started 
sorting through the packages with less enthusiasm than before.  Halfway 
through the pile she placed a package on his lap.  "Open it."

	"Dana..."

	"The card was addressed to you and Josh on the inside."

	"What?"  A deeper frown furrowed his brow.

	"It's from Skinner.  Open it."

	He reluctantly did so.  He stared in confusion for a moment or two 
after he unwrapped the package, then he smiled.  "Skinner does have a sense of 
humor, Scully."  He held up the thing for her inspection.  "Now, is it for me 
or Josh?"

	She stared at the Marvin the Martian. It held a baby bottle instead of 
a ray-gun, but still managed to have the "take me to your leader" attitude.   
"Oh, great.  Just what I need."  Her tone held the customary skepticism, but 
she was smiling.  Maybe it wasn't completely due to her imagination.  Maybe 
Josh really did look a lot like Mulder already.  Good.  That fact would mess 
with people's heads for awhile.

	As she opened more gifts and made mental notes of what went where, she 
asked, "So what did Skinner say?"

	"Nothing."

	"What?"

	"He didn't say anything.  He didn't try and talk me out of it; he just 
asked how long I would be staying."

	"So what did you tell him?"

	"Four weeks.  Max."

	"Just in time for the wedding."

	"Yep."  Mulder shifted the baby as he began to wake up.  Josh made a 
couple of frustrated noises and then seemed to focus his attention on the 
large black and white spots on Mulder's tie.  Mulder couldn't believe how slow 
the day had passed because of his desire to be home like this.  Almost 
everything he had ever hoped for in life was in his grasp.  He pushed the dark 
thoughts about what was missing to the back of his mind.  He wanted to savor 
these moments for all they were worth.

		* * * * *

	They were arguing.  They were always arguing.  It didn't matter if it 
was about the TV, who could ride in the front seat, or who was winning what 
game, they always found something to fight about.  He sometimes wished that 
there was only one of them.

	And then there was.

	The silence in the house that followed hurt his ears.  The adults no 
longer spoke to each other and the child withdrew into himself.  The arguments 
stopped, but so did the laughter.

	Mulder sat up straight and looked around the dim room frantically.  
Scully was still sleeping peacefully, but there were faint sounds coming from 
Josh's bassinet.  He carefully got out of the bed and walked over to his son. 
 The baby was fretting and almost looked as if he were having a nightmare.  
Mulder hoped not as he picked him up.  The distressed sounds stopped almost 
instantly as the baby went back to sleep.

	Mulder went into the living room to pace with the baby.  He thought 
about the old nightmare with the new theme.  It hadn't been a twelve year old 
Fox Mulder and his sister arguing.  It had been his children.  He had wished 
there was only one and then there was.  He held the baby closer and tried to 
convince himself that he wasn't like his father.  He would never make those 
choices.  He would die first.

	Scully got back in the bed as she saw Mulder's frantic pacing slow 
down to a soothing sway.  She had never realized how frequent his nightmares 
were until he started spending his nights at her place.  He must have kept 
most of them to himself before.  If he had called as often as he had them, she 
would never have slept.  Not that she got much sleep now with feedings every 
three hours.

	He came back into the bedroom several minutes later and put the baby 
back in his bed.  As he climbed back under the covers, she asked, "You OK?"

	"I'm fine, Scully.  Go on back to sleep."

	She recognized the "I don't want to talk about it" tone and nodded.  
She did however move over to rest her head on his shoulder.  "I love you," she 
said and felt his arm encircle her back.

	"I love you, too.  Now go to sleep.  You're keeping me awake with your 
jabbering."

	She did as she was told, but only because she wanted to.  That and she 
was learning to catch what sleep when she could.  Josh would be demanding 
sustenance in another hour, and she knew it would take Mulder more than a 
couple of hours to calm down before he was ready to talk.  She was counting on 
an interesting conversation over breakfast.

		* * * * *

	She was a little shocked when he told her what the dream had been 
about.  "Mulder, you would never do that."

	"But I did."

	"Mulder, do you think you might have been having the dream from what 
you think would be your father's point of view?"

	"What?"

	"Remember, I'm not the psychologist here, but what if you were trying 
to justify the father's actions by blaming the kids?"

	"Not "the father", my father.  And the kids were really me and my 
sister?"

	"Yeah.  Mulder, I know you.  You would NEVER do something like that.  
You know what it's like on the other side of things."

	"Plus you would probably shoot me again if you thought I was going to 
do it."  He was grinning as he started putting his tie on.

	"Nah.  I wouldn't shoot you, again, Mulder.  That threat has lost some 
of its effectiveness.  But there are other things I could do to hurt you.  
Seriously hurt you."  She walked over and insinuated herself between the 
mirror and the man.

	Mulder's grin turned uneasy as she tightened his tie.  "Better watch 
it, Scully.  You're turning me on."

	"Remember: No huggin' or kissin' until I get a weddin' ring."

	"Ugh.  Don't give up your day job, Scully.  That was terrible.  And 
it's only two more weeks."

	"Tell me about it."  Her tone was definitely one of frustration.  Even 
if they wanted to do anything, her body was taking its own sweet time healing.

	"I will.  When I get back from the office.  I should be home around 
six.  I expect dinner to be waiting for me."

	"In your dreams, Mulder."

	"Nah.  I have more important things to dream about.  Food products are 
only a small part of the big picture."

	"Good-bye, Mulder."

	"Bye, Scully."  He leaned down and captured her lips in a kiss.  "I'll 
call ya.  I have a few things I want to run by you on this case."

	She shut the door behind him and went to retrieve a fussing Joshua.  
Time for his mid-morning snack before his mid-morning meal.  The baby 
definitely had his father's eating habits and metabolism.  She was going to be 
more than happy to start supplementing his diet with formula as she started 
thinking about returning to work.

		* * * * *

	They had a civil ceremony and kept the attendance to a minimum.  They 
decided to hold a picnic reception for Scully's family and the few people 
Mulder invited, namely his mother and the guys at The Lone Gunman.  Skinner 
made a brief appearance, but he was the only one from the Bureau that had been 
invited, thanks to Mrs. Scully.  Of course, they took the baby with them on 
the honeymoon.  Scully was still breast-feeding most of the time and didn't 
feel like UPS'ing the milk to her mother's house.  But maybe more importantly, 
neither Mulder or Scully wanted to be away from Josh for that long of a 
period.

	They really had no plans other than to get out of the city.  So after 
everything was piled into the car, they just drove for awhile.  For the first 
time in a long time, they didn't get lost and Scully found it extremely 
amusing.  Mulder did as well, but hid it behind an indignant glare.  They 
stopped at a small town in Pennsylvania for gas and to feed Josh when Scully 
decided that this place was as good as any.  Mulder was more than willing to 
stay in the town for the night.  If it hadn't been for this place, he would 
have pulled over soon to finally make love to his wife.

	"We could keep driving, if you're not tired," she offered 
straight-faced, just to see what he would say.

	"No.  Here's fine, Scully.  If we don't like it, we can go somewhere 
else tomorrow.  Anyway, you and the baby are probably tired."

	She wasn't fooled by his considerate attitude.  "Josh, maybe, but I'm 
nowhere near ready for sleep."

	His blood pressure increased at the slow smile she offered.  "Oh, but 
you will be.  I promise you that."

	The baby was asleep and Mulder was in the bathroom.  And she was 
nervous.  She wasn't afraid, but she was a little bit anxious.  After all, it 
was their wedding night.

	Mulder came out of the bathroom with a gleam in his eye that she had 
become very familiar with in the last six months.  Although, for the past few, 
the gleam was held in control and she recognized it from the past as their 
years as partners.

	"Is he asleep?"

	"Yeah," she answered slowly.

	"Come here," he said and opened his arms.

	She stepped close, but placed a hand on his chest.  "I want to change 
first."

	He bent his head to reach her lips.  Slowly he explored their 
contours.  It was several moments before he raised his head and then he 
smiled.  Her eyes were smoky and her lips were rosy and swollen.  "I'm not 
going anywhere."

	She smiled, grabbed the small sack that Mulder hadn't known she 
packed, and closed the door behind her.  It didn't take her that long to 
change into the negligee, but she didn't step out into the main room right 
away.  She eyed herself carefully in the mirror.  She still wasn't back down 
to her normal size and with breast-feeding a part of her wouldn't be for 
awhile yet.  But the rest, the rest she was happy with.  She took a deep 
breath and opened the door.

	Mulder looked up from his inspection of the baby and stared at the 
vision that was his wife.  He lost the ability to breathe and think clearly, 
but he didn't care.  He was working on instinct alone now.  He slowly crossed 
the room and stood before her.  "I love you."  He waited long enough to hear 
her say the words, then he pulled her into his arms.

	He just held her for a moment, and Scully grew restless.  "Mulder?"

	"Hmm?"

	"Aren't you going to kiss me?"

	"Yeah," he said against her lips.

	She felt her feet leave the floor, but was only vaguely aware of it.  
Just as long as she didn't lose contact with his body, she was happy.

	They made love slowly, exploring each other fully.  They stared into 
each others eyes as he entered her, making them one.  Mulder's eyes then 
closed and Scully arched in ecstasy.  It was the cumulation of years of 
dreaming and definitely worth the wait.  The pace of their movements picked up 
as time stood still.  Afterwards, they held each other and listened as their 
breathing and hearts grew steady once more.

	"Why did we wait so long?"

	"Because we were both idiots?" she offered as an explanation.

	"You, maybe, but not me."

	"Uhm, I suppose that's why we waited until we were married to have 
sex."  She had quickly changed her mind about waiting after that first night. 
 Mulder was the one that had then insisted on the delay.

	"Make love," he corrected.

	"Yeah, you're right.  Sex never came close to that."

	"Well, I don't know.  I've had some pretty vivid dreams over the 
years."

	"Was I in those dreams?" she asked half seriously.

	"In them?  You were the star."

	"I've had some pretty vivid ones about you too, Mulder."  His name was 
said around a jaw-popping yawn.

	"As you said, we were both idiots."

	"Not any more.  Now, we're married."

	"Idiots."

		* * end * *

End of New Beginnings Part 1 -- Something New