From: Darrya Lipscomb Date: Fri, 4 Jun 1999 08:28:08 -0700 (PDT) Subject: Surrender(1/3) Title: Surrender(1/3) Authors: too_divine and fantasy1ni94 Email Address: too_divine@yahoo.com Rating: PG-13 Category: Story, Mulder/Scully Romance Spoiler: "One Son" Keyword: Mulder/Scully Romance Summary: Mulder's trust of Diana Fowley becomes a rift in Mulder and Scully's relationship. Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully do not belong to us. They are the brilliant creations of Chris Carter and 1013 productions. Much Props! Authors' notes: We wanted to create a story based on the tension that Diana Fowley's past relationship with Mulder brings on the relationship between him and Scully. It picks up right after Scully confronts Mulder with what she and the Lone Gunman have learned about Fowley in "One Son". Please email us with your opinions on it. This is our first story and we could use the input. Enjoy! ******************************************************* Surrender (1/3) By too_divine and fantasy1ni94 Pissed. That was an understatement. Scully was infuriated. No, irate. That asshole. How could he, she thought as she turned the steering wheel and drove down the street to her apartment. After all they had been through and all the times that bastard had said that she was the only one he trusted. How could he not trust her on this. The simplest thing to trust. She had given him proof in that room with the Lone Gunman. The woman was bad news. She had felt it the first time she met Diana. That woman was definitely up to something and for some reason Mulder could not see it. They had some deep dark past that no one would tell her about. All Mulder would say is that they worked together. Bullshit. It wasn't just that. All those long looks and suffocating silences, nor their strained conversation amounted up to just another working relationship. She knew Mulder like she knew herself, but this relationship they had she could not uncover. Not through his eyes nor his mannerisms. He was just not giving it away. On the other hand, Diana looked at her like she wanted to tell her. Either way, this relationship was getting in the way of what had to be done. Their quest. And Mulder for some damn reason couldn't see it. She parked, opened up her car door, and pulled her briefcase out of the car violently. She was going to prove it to him whether he liked it or not. On second thought, she did a U-turn, opened the case and threw the file back in her car. If he didn't care why the hell should she? Let him get screwed then he'll know who he should have trusted. She stomped up the stairs to her apartment, opened the door, and slammed it. God, he made her mad. She threw her keys on the coffee table and kicked her shoes off sending them across the room and straight into the wall behind the TV. She opened up her refrigerator and stood there looking at the food. She wanted something. She just didn't know what. She paced around the apartment looking for something to throw or hit. Nothing would do. She wanted to throw or hit him. What had Diana done to deserve his trust? Had she gone on tireless stakeouts with him only to sit in the car all night and wait for nothing to pan out? Had she awakened at three o'clock in the morning to his voice on the other end of the telephone telling her to get dressed? Had she spent six years protecting him, following him, believing in him? What had *she* done? The hell with him. She went into the bedroom and closed the door. Mulder unlocked his apartment door, eased inside, threw his keys on the table and walked directly to his couch. Scully. How, scratch that, why was she obsessed with proving that Diana was no good? It wasn't jealousy. Scully was secure about her place in his life. She knew he would do anything for her. He had proven that time and time again. On top of that, she knew nothing about his relationship with Diana. He had made sure of that. He had been very careful. Diana, on the other hand, was not helping the situation. If Scully was paying attention, which she always did, she probably knew something by now. The woman had done nothing to her with the exception of the quarantine and burning her favorite black suit. Why did she dislike the woman so much? They were the same. These were two women who were exactly the same in their professionalism, their drive, and their commitment to get the job done. He trusted them both. Scully had asked him tonight to choose between them and he couldn't. He knew Scully believed what she was saying was the truth, but he could not believe that Diana was not being up front. He knew her too well. They had meant too much to each other in the past. Scully didn't know about that and he planned to keep it that way. He just didn't want to get into that conversation, besides she already hated her. Why confuse the situation anymore with Scully finding out he had an emotional attachment. He leaned back on the couch and turned the television on. No, Scully did not need to know about that. It would just cause bigger problems. Ding! The sound of the elevator arriving to the floor of the executive offices brought Scully out of her reverie. She stood next to her partner as they both waited for the elevator doors to open. Neither one of them had said more than three words to the other all that morning. Scully was still reeling from the account of the events that had taken place recently. Cassandra's disappearance once again. Agent Spender's sudden alliance. And, of course, Diana Fowley. The mention of that woman was leaving a bitter taste in her mouth as was Mulder's defense of her. Scully preceded Mulder into the elevator and punched the button to their floor with a little more force than was necessary. Why was she getting herself so worked up again? Mulder had made his feelings clear about the subject of Diana Fowley. And so had she dammit! She was tired of trying to protect Mulder. Hell. Who was she kidding? She was only trying to protect herself. Or better yet, the connection she and Mulder had with each other. But lately it seemed like that connection was unraveling before her very eyes. Last night she tried to reach out to Mulder. Tried to make him see that her connection to him went beyond their work on the x-files and that indeed her feelings for him * were* personal. Whoosh! The doors of the elevator opened once again breaking Scully out of her contemplation. This time Mulder beat her out of the elevator to head to his desk. No doubt he was ready to get back to the basement Scully thought. They had been summoned into A.D. Kersh's office early that morning only to be informed that they were back on the x-files. The news was a welcome relief to both her and Mulder. Now it was time for her to pack her belongings and move her things back downstairs. Scully finally finished settling into her office and sat back in her chair to stretch. The only time she saw Mulder was in passing when she had the occasion to sneak a few sideways glances in his direction. They still hadn't had anything to say to one another. She and Mulder never had a problem with communication whether it be verbal or unspoken. There was just a silent understanding between them. But the only thing she understood now was that she was losing Mulder. He was slowly slipping away from her. Retreating into himself. He seemed almost....cold at times. C'mon Scully, she chided herself. With her bitchy moods lately, how could she blame him? But she didn't blame him at all. She blamed Diana Fowley for what was happening. Dammit! That woman again! She was going to put a stop to the madness that was swirling around in her head. The information she received about Agent Fowley was not enough. She was going to have to dig deeper. And yes, it really is about to get personal. Scully grabbed her bag abruptly and headed for the exit. She had a few informative stops to make before she headed for lunch. He just didn't get it. What had he done now to make Scully give him the silent treatment. He thought she would be happy to hear that they were back on the x-files. Well, officially back on the x-files that is. But she never said a word. He knew her interest was not waning where their work was concerned that's for sure. She was just as committed as he was. There was something much deeper going on with Scully, and he knew it had to do with something more than just Diana Fowley. Diana. Dana. Dana. Diana. Aw, man. What was he going to do? He was caught between the two of them. He had a history with Diana. How could he ignore that? And then, he had feelings for Scully. Feelings he wasn't sure she was ready to take on. Every time he got close, she backed away. He was tired of the cold dose called reality hitting him in the face. It was becoming harder and harder to work so closely with her. His heart was telling him to push but his head kept saying 'No, it's not time yet!' Fuck! There never seemed to be a right time where Scully was concerned. The more he tried to keep his feelings in check, the further he distanced himself from her. Which he, unfortunately, had to keep on doing until Scully finally acknowledged what was happening between them. You would think his subsequent move to the basement might bring his head back into focus. That was not the case for Mulder. Every time he saw her in between offices the task at hand became all the more difficult. He couldn't help but turn and look in her direction, and every time that he did she seemed preoccupied or something. And it was the something that continued to eat away at him. Mulder stacked the items in his two boxes on his desk. Home. Sweet home. He decided that it was time to get started with work. Mulder was about to dig into another case file when he realized it was past lunch. He wondered what Scully could possibly be engrossed in not to come and drag him out of his research. Well, he could just see if she wanted to grab a bite to eat with him. Mulder walked around the corner to Scully's office. "Scully, I was w..." Now, where had she gone? Scully usually checked in and out with him. Scully eventually ended up at the door of Langly, Byers, and Frohike. "And what do we attribute this honor to?" Frohike said as he finally unlocked the last of a series of chains and opened the heavy door. Scully stepped into the darkness. The room flashed with light from the computer screens. Frohike stepped outside the door frame and looked down the hall. "Where's Mulder?" "Just me." Scully said with her usual intensity. "What? lovers quarrel? You guys haven't made up from the other night?" Langly teased. Scully answered with a look that communicated quite well that he might want to shut up and sit down. "Don't worry, Red. He doesn't deserve you. Maybe we could get to know each other better." Frohike said as he came up behind her and tried to touch her on the shoulder. Scully spun around and gave him a look that stopped him mid sentence. "Look, I don't have time to play with you guys today. I need you to get everything, and I do mean everything you can get on Agent Diana Fowley and I need it yesterday." Scully meant to save Mulder even if he didn't want to be saved. As long as she was standing that woman was not going to hurt him. "What's the hurry?" Byers looked suspicious. He knew something was up. He could smell it. It just didn't smell like a juicy cover up or conspiracy. It smelled like something else he just couldn't put his finger on. "Don't worry about that quite yet gentleman. But believe me when you find what I have a feeling you'll find, you'll understand." Scully grabbed her bag and dashed out the door on her way home. Mulder fished the key to his car out of his pocket as he took the last two steps up the stairs to the level his car was parked on. Fuck Scully. He was tired of having to deal with her mood swings. If she didn't want to talk he'd let her not talk. Hell, he could stand it if she could. He started the car and peeled off down towards the exit. He turned left out into the hurried traffic and started on his way home. The elevator stopped with a jolt and made the usual series of alarming sounds it makes when the doors open. The damn super hasn't fixed this thing yet, Mulder thought as he continued his slow stroll down the rest of the hallway. When he got to his door, he lifted the keys to the lock and stopped. Something was not right. Mulder had an extremely acute sense of alarm. It had gotten him out of more than a few bad situations. It was like scary intuition. When something strange was about to happen he knew it. He didn't know exactly what was going to happen but it wasn't going to be good, with one smooth arm motion he pulled his gun, cocked it and held it in front of him. The door creaked open with one push and there was silence. Maybe this time he was wrong. He was naturally paranoid. It was part of his makeup. Maybe this was one of those times. He crept in looking to the right and then to the left, failing to look directly ahead of him. Then he sensed a presence. Diana. He looked up and she was sitting on the couch comfortably looking at him. He stood straight up and put the gun back in the holster. "What are you doing here?" He said as he pulled off his jacket and threw it on the couch beside her. She followed the motion until the jacket landed and turned back to him. "Never were much for cleaning up were you, Fox?" The tone of her voice saying his name stopped him cold. "You didn't answer my question. How did you get in here?" He stood in the doorway. "I still have a key. Did you forget? What the hell happened to this place anyway?" She stood swiftly and strolled towards him. "I came to tell you that I was informed today on your reassignment to the x-files. Anyway, I'm here to lend my support and let you know that if and when I'm reassigned I'll still help you in anyway I can. I owe you that much." "You could have told me that in the little building downtown they call FBI Headquarters. What else is on your mind?" He wanted to hear the answer, but he was afraid of what the answer might be. "You lately." Damn that intuition. Mulder felt like kicking her in the teeth. It had taken him a long time to move on and she was pulling him back into the past with just two words. "Well, thanks for stopping by. I'll see you in the office tomorrow." He abruptly backed up and turned the knob to open the door. "Okay. You don't want to talk we won't talk but don't think I'm about to end the discussion." She picked up her coat and quickly walked out the door. Mulder shut the door locked it and went to the kitchen to get a drink. He needed a rum and coke badly. The sound of an old black and white movie filled the room, Mulder tossed and turned on the couch trying to get comfortable. It wasn't the couch, but the thoughts in his head that were keeping him up all night. He rose up and put both feet on the floor. Damn it, Scully. He quickly stood up, grabbed a pair of jeans, threw on a gray T-shirt, grabbed the leather jacket sitting on the table and hurried out the door. Scully could hear everything as she laid in her bed with her eyes closed. She turned and looked at the clock. 2:45. What the hell? Couldn't the woman next door keep that crying baby quiet? She moved down in the bed and pulled the covers over her head. At least she was in her bed and not on some wild goose chase with Mr. ou're-the-only-one-I-can-trust-but-I-can't- trust-you-on-Diana. A series of heavy urgent knocks on the front door of her apartment jostled her from her thoughts. Who could this be? She pulled a robe on and hurried out of the bedroom. She put her hand on the door and stood up on her toes to peer through the peephole. Mulder. What was he doing here? I swear if I open this door and he wants me to help him with some urgent case I'm going to pull out my gun and shoot him. Period. She swung the door open. "What?" Before she got the word sufficiently out of her mouth, he brushed by her in two easy steps and turned around to face her. She stood there looking at him. "Are you going to shut the door or are you planning on more company?" He looked her directly in the eyes at first and then slowly followed her body down to her feet before he started the long trip back up again to meet her face. "You're going to have to wear that a little more often Agent Scully. Maybe to work. I'm sure you'd get a lot more accomplished with the big wigs." He smiled. Scully followed his gaze and quickly closed the robe to cover the short, silk nightshirt she wore. "What? What is it? Why'd you come here? A case? Aliens have actually landed on earth and taken over the White House? What?" Her annoyance was obvious, but it didn't seem to sway Mulder from what he'd come there to do. She recognized that look he was giving her. It was determination. He was going to accomplish his mission. "What is your problem?" He said it quietly. He pinned her to the wall with his eyes determined to get a straight answer. The tension and silence in the room was suffocating. "My problem? I'm the one with the problem? Of course, you couldn't possibly be the one with the problem." She walked up to him and stopped a safe distance away. If she'd gotten any closer she would have slapped him. "Leave, Mulder." She said quietly. Mulder took a step towards her and she backed away. "Is this about the other night? I told you I know Diana. She couldn't possibly be who you think she is. Why can't you accept that?" "Do you trust me?" "What?" "Do you trust me?" Scully said again as she stared directly into his eyes. "What do you mean do I trust you? Of course I trust you." "Then why can't you trust me on this? What do you think you know that I don't? Why all the sudden do you trust her more than you do me?" Scully was hurt and Mulder could see it. There was nothing he could do about it and it killed him. She was just going to have to drop this crusade. "I know her, Scully, that's all. I just know her." Mulder had to make her understand. That answer wasn't enough. He knew her too. He knew she would only tell him what she believed to be fact. Why when the two of them were compared in his mind did Diana win? She looked into his eyes and saw that the answer was not going to change no matter how hard she tried and it felt like she had been punched in the stomach. "Go home Mulder." She turned around and started towards her bedroom. "Scully." "GET OUT !!!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. Mulder was noticeably shaken, but he quickly moved after her grabbing her arm and spinning her around."Mulder, let me go!" She struggled but he held on. Finally, she grew tired and looked up at him. Mulder leaned in close to her to the point in which it seemed their noses would touch. Scully hated having her personal space invaded. That was one of the things that bothered him so much about her. She squirmed but he was determined to recapture some kind of intimacy with his partner. He looked down into her eyes in a way that made her feel like he was looking into her soul. That scared her. What would he find in there? All kinds of secrets she just didn't want to reveal including the ultimate one that Scully herself hid from everyday. The one that would change their partnership forever if he knew it. She shifted her eyes and looked down only to have Mulder put his fingers on her chin and guide them back up again. After it seemed an eternity, he spoke in a almost inaudible whisper. "I trust you with my life Scully, you know that. But I can't believe that someone I once loved could be a fake." With that said, he dropped his eyes, turned around and headed for the door. Scully stood mesmerized in the same spot after the door closed. He had loved Diana. She stood there quietly trying to absorb it. She knew he had a life before she'd come into his office that day six years ago, but it never had really occurred to her that he might have had a real relationship. It was such an obvious conclusion to come to. Why hadn't she seen it? Or maybe she had seen it and just didn't want admit it to herself. She stood there unable to breath. For the first time in her life with Mulder, she felt threatened. Genuinely threatened. It was a strange feeling. She had always been the most important thing in Mulder's life. Now, this woman he'd known long ago was threatening the trust and partnership that they had built. He'd picked this woman over her to believe. She willed her legs to move and slowly walked in the bedroom and closed the door. Mulder got in to his car and cursed himself. Why did he tell her that? Now she was sure to find out the rest of it. He just could not look at her with all that hurt in her eyes and not explain to her why he was unable to believe her this time. She couldn't understand it no matter how hard he tried to send the unspoken thoughts her way. He had to tell her. She had to understand. Do you think she understands now, you dimwit? She now thinks she doesn't know you at all and wait till she finds out the rest. Oh, she'll put in for a transfer. You've really done it now. You just should have told her in the first place. When Diana appeared back in town. I was trying to her protect her, he thought. From what? They were partners and they were best friends. There was nothing to protect her from. The next morning Scully appeared in the office uncharacteristically early. She walked down the basement hallway to her office and threw her things in the chair beside her desk. Get over it Dana. So what he loved somebody. What was the big deal? We're partners. It is not his responsibility to sit down and list every person he's ever had more than a passing interest in. She sat quietly in her office and opened her file drawer. She pulled some files out and pretended to read them. Something drew her to Mulder's office. She got up, convincing herself that she had to look for a file he needed to write a closing report on. She stepped into the quiet office and made a beeline for his desk. She sat down in the chair and turned to open the file cabinet behind her. He had to have something here that would give her a hint of what their true history together had been. A noise coming from the hallway, turned her around. Diana Fowley was standing in the doorway. Scully narrowed her eyes and tried to get control of the rage that was building in her. "Is there something I can do for you, Agent Fowley?" "Agent Scully. I was looking for Fox. Is he in yet?" The idea of her calling him by his first name infuriated her even more. Scully wanted to jump out of the chair and grab her around her neck. "He's not in yet. Is there something I can help you with?" Scully didn't want her dealing with Mulder at all. If there was something work related she needed, Scully would swallow her pride and do it if only to keep her away from him. "No. I'll just come back later." Diana turned and walked slowly towards the doorway. She paused as if she was mulling it over and then turned around to face Scully again. "Agent Scully, can I ask you a question?" "I suppose so, Agent Fowley." "Is there a reason why you dislike me so much?" Oh, about a hundred. Pull up a chair and we can go through them all, Scully thought. She stood up, walked around to the front of the desk and looked Diana directly in the eyes. "You are out to hurt Mulder. I don't know how and I don't know when, but I won't let you do it." She said quietly. "Hurt him? Why would..."Diana began. "Shut up. Save all that acting for Mulder. I know your up to something and when I find out what it is your going to wish you'd never been born." Scully turned and walked back behind the desk and sat down, still eyeballing Diana. "Now you have a nice day, Agent Fowley." Diana walked forward and leaned down on the desk. "Why are you so protective, Agent Scully? Are you threatened by the little old ex-wife?" Scully couldn't speak. Ex-wife. He married her. She tried to regain some composure. Scully stood and got inches away from Diana, "Just believe that I will protect what I care for. Even if it means killing or maiming." Mulder entered the office as if on que and instantly wanted to turn back around. The scene looked positively brutal. He stood in the open doorway trying to figure out what to do. Scully looked over Diana's shoulder at Mulder and sat back down in his chair. Diana turned quickly and headed for the door almost knocking him over as she passed. "What was that all about?" He asked as he walked over to Scully and hung his jacket up on the coat rack next to the desk. Scully just stared at him. She said nothing. She stood up from his chair and headed for the door. "Boy, do I know how to clear a room." Scully stopped as soon as the comment left Mulder's lips. "Married. You were married to that bitch!" Mulder's face dropped. He said nothing. Scully waited for something. An explanation. An apology. Something. Nothing came. He looked as if he didn't know what to say. She spun around and slammed the door behind her. Mulder stood stunned. How did she find out? Diana, stupid. She couldn't keep her mouth closed. He instantly walked out of the room and down the hall to Scully's office. Scully sat at her desk looking down at an open file. She heard him enter but didn't look up. "Scully, I..." Mulder began. "I'm sorry." She interrupted. "I got upset and I lost control. I apologize." She seemed so defeated. Mulder had never seen her look so defeated before. Even when she was dying of cancer. She never looked like she had given up. The look concerned him. He was unfamiliar with it. He desperately wanted to see her eyes to see what was in them, but she wouldn't look at him. He crossed the room to touch her to gain some kind of reassurance. If he touched her he would know that they were okay. When he reached her she finally looked up at him. "Scully, there was a reason I didn't tell you that made since to me at the time." He reached out to touch her on the shoulder, but she stood up and walked from behind the desk. If he touches me I'll lose it. I mean really lose it and I can't do that ever. He can't know the way I really feel, Scully thought. His touch always got to her. She tried not to show it, but when he touched her it surged through her. She had to protect herself from it or risk him knowing everything. He chalked it up to paranoia over personal space, but it was more than that. It was him. "It's okay Mulder. We all have pasts that we just haven't spoken about. It's not like I have to know everything about you." But she thought she did. She wanted to. She wanted to be the only person in the world who knew everything about Fox Mulder. She thought she had accomplished that until Diana Fowley came along. "I want you to know this, Scully." He sat down on the edge of her desk and seem to wrestle with what words should come next. "We were only married for six months and then one day she came home to tell me she was reassigned and she was moving overseas. My work was here. I had just been assigned to the x-files. She went on to Europe and I stayed here. Then one day I got annulment papers in the mail and that was that." Mulder finished exasperated as if it had taken all he had in him to tell the story. Scully saw the pain that washed across his face and wanted to make it okay. She came to him and placed her hands on his face. Mulder loved being touched by Scully. It was like being touched by an angel. Her hands were small and soft, but there was immense strength in them. He placed his hands over hers and looked up at her. The phone rang. Scully took her hands from Mulder's face and reached across the desk seizing the receiver quickly. Saved by the bell, she thought. If I looked at him for one more second I don't know what would have happened. "Scully." "Agent Scully, A.D. Skinner would like to see you and you Agent Mulder in his office." Back to old Skinner. She'd missed him. "We'll be there." She said quickly and hung up. She looked back at Mulder for the first time since she'd let go of his face. "Skinner wants to see us." Mulder stood and walked to the door. Scully walked up next to him and looked up at him. Her eyes questioned his. "After you, Agent Scully." Was Mulder's answer and he guided her out the door. Surrender (2/3) by too_divine and fantasy1ni94 Scully walked into her apartment, closed the door, and leaned against it for a minute. A tear slowly ran down her cheek, she quickly brushed it away and tossed her keys and purse on the sofa. She'd had more than she could stand. She knew Diana was baiting her. But why did she keep rising to it? She walked to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of juice out of the refrigerator. She had popped the top off the bottle and taken a long swallow when she heard a knock at the door. Great, she thought. He was the last person she wanted to see right now. Shouldn't he be somewhere rubbing up against that snake he called an ex-wife? The last thing she wanted was company. She thought for a moment about just letting him knock, pretending she wasn't there. She set the bottle on the counter and went to the door. Before she could answer it, she heard Mulder on the other side. "C'mon, Scully. I know you're in here." Scully unlocked the door and partially opened it. "Mulder, what are you doing here?" "Scully, I need to talk to you." "Look Mulder. I'm tired and I really don't feel like talking right now." "There are a few things we need to clear up." "Oh no, Mulder, I understand perfectly. You don't owe me any explanations. If you and Diana want to do the wild thing in your office on the floor, that is your business. I'm your partner not your mother. All cleared up?" "Scully, you don't understand ....." "Yes, Mulder. I do. In fact it's quite obvious. You still have feelings for her. What does that have to do with me?" "Yes, I admit I care for Diana. We used to be married." "How could I possibly forget?" She said rolling her eyes. Mulder shoved his way inside, walked toward the sofa, and did an about face. "What's really bothering you Scully? Why have you been so bitchy lately?" "What?" Scully said slamming the door, then turned around to face Mulder, "The only bitch in this situation, Mulder, has been Diana Fowley." "Not this again. Why does it bother you so much that Diana used to be my wife?" Why does he have to keep throwing that up in my face? Scully thought. "That doesn't bother me." she grinded out. "Then what is it, Scully. What is your damn problem?" Silence."Dammit, talk to me!" "Alright. I'll tell you what my problem is. She's manipulating you and you can't even see it because your judgement is so clouded where she is concerned. I keep trying to tell you she's out to get you and it's like beating my head up against a brick wall. You don't hear me. She has somekind of spell on you I can't break. She somehow has you convinced that you can't trust me when it comes to her." "This is not about trust Scully. This is about something else entirely." Mulder said quietly grabbing her hand. Scully's head jerked up at the statement and she instantly snatched her hand back. "Mulder, listen. I don't know wh..." Scully said defensively. "No, Scully, you listen. I trust you. I trust you mind, body, and soul. What I don't trust is your reason behind making Diana such a big issue. I think it has less to do with Diana and more to do with me." Scully's eyes flicked around nervously. "Mulder, I don't know what you mean." "I think you do." He closed the distance between them and placed his hands on her shoulders. Scully started to pull away from him. "No," he said, holding on to her tightly while drawing her body all the more closer to his. "I'm not going to let you run away this time. Everytime we get close to something, somekind of truth about our feelings for each other. You run away and I let you. We can't keep ignoring what's happening between us." "What are you saying, Mulder?" "I'm saying that we have sidestepped this dance for far too long. I think your feelings for me go far deeper than you care to admit. Hell, than I cared to admit for awhile." "Mulder, what I think is going on here is that your emotions for Diana are coinciding with your feelings for me." "Okay, so how do you explain your actions? We would have kissed in my hallway if that bee wouldn't have stung you. Was I the only one who wanted that? I believe the saying is it takes two to tango? If Diana was my reason what was yours? "That day was traumatic for both of us. We were both very emotional....." "Dammit Scully! Why is it so hard for you to admit the truth? What are you so afraid of?" "Mulder, of course I have an emotional attachment to you. We've been through so much together, how could I not? But there's nothing between us but friendship, special friendship, but friendship just the same. "So your telling me that you would have no feelings either way about me getting back together with Diana. It wouldn't bother you in the least." Mulder inched closer to her and Scully backed up. "I don't think it would be the wisest thing to do, but no, I wouldn't be insanely jealous, if that's what you mean." "It wouldn't bother you that I was touching her, holding her." He kept walking towards her and she kept backing up until she was pressed up against the wall behind her with no place to go. Mulder kept coming until their bodies were inches apart. "Mulder, what are you doing?" She said quietly. "And if you knew that I was kissing her..." Mulder leaned his head down until their lips were centimeters apart. "That wouldn't bother you." He whispered slowly. Scully's body froze. Don't move. He's trying to make a point, Scully told herself. And he's doing a damn good job of it. Scully tried to concentrate on anything else but being pinned up against this man that she wanted so desperately. "Scully," Mulder's voice woke her up from her chosen trance, "you didn't answer me. Would it bother you?" He looked down at her with a half smile thinking that he had accomplished his duty. He had proven Scully wrong once again. She had to admit it now. He could literally feel how badly she wanted to kiss him, to give in to the passion. She took a deep breath to gather her composure, looked him in the eyes and lied to him for the first time in her life. "No, Mulder. It wouldn't bother me at all." Mulder didn't say a word. He spun around and headed for the door. He opened the door and turned around to look at her. "I know the truth, Scully and you can't hide from it." He turned again and stormed out leaving the door open behind him. Scully stood for a moment and walked out into the hallway just in time to see him tear down the stairs. She closed the door silently and leaned against it. Mulder was right. She was afraid. Afraid of her feelings for him. Afraid of change. Afraid of losing the one person she depended on. Mulder was fearless. He jumped into any situation and thought about the consequences later. That's why he was there in her apartment tonight begging her to tell him what he wanted to hear. She was always the one weighing the aftershocks, trying to predict the future, always asking what if. It balanced them as FBI agents, but it was an almost impossible wall to crumble when trying to get personal. Her instincts told her to yell out to him as he stormed out the door, but something in the back of her mind would not let her speak. She let him go. What if we try and it doesn't work? What if I lose myself in him? What if this changes everything? In her mind, she had to let him go or risk everything. Everything they'd built over the past years. But most of all, she needed to protect her sanity. She had to protect herself from the feelings. The fear of losing him now paralyzed her. Losing him after they had finally become more would destroy her. He had to remain her partner. Mulder opened the door to his dark apartment and threw the keys on the table. He sat down on the couch and leaned his head on the wall behind it. He was finished. Done. Scully wanted to be partners and he was finished with trying to make her see the truth. His only choice was to let her win and move on. Maybe she was right. Maybe he was the only one. He didn't know exactly when these feelings had developed for Scully but they had developed and at a rapid pace. One day they were partners and the next he couldn't see his life without her next to him, guiding him, supporting him, protecting him, believing in him. Maybe he had just mistaken those things for love, when it was truly her friendship. He had shake these feelings and go on being partners. The elevator door opened and Scully sighed before she stepped hesitantly out into the hallway. She woke up this morning dreading going to the office. She had hurt him last night and she was afraid she had hurt their relationship. She walked slowly down the hallway and noticed that Mulder's office was dark. Just get to your office, she thought. She passed the doorway and saw Mulder facing the slideshow he had created on the wall. "Scully." Damn, how did he know she was there. He hadn't even turned around. "Yes. Mulder." She said worried that he was going to bring up the drama of the other night. "Pack your bags. We're going to Louisiana." He said as he rose from the chair and turned to look at her. It was hard for a minute but the more he forced himself to stare at her the easier it became. He could do this. Hell, he's been doing it for six years. "A woman was found dead in small town outside of New Orleans, the police out there think it has something to do with the resident Voodoo Priestest." Scully walked in and Mulder handed her the file that was laying on his desk. Scully zoned out as Mulder clicked away at the slides on his wall. What is he doing? Being your partner a voice in Scully's head answered back. Scully snapped back to reality. "Mulder, Voodoo is a scary fairytale that has been told so much that some believe in it." She replied. "Voodoo cases would not be documented in well organized case file, Scully. Talk to anyone in New Orleans and they will tell you about a case in which Voodoo has healed the sick, cast evil away or just plain been used as revenge. Voodoo is word of mouth magic. I booked us on a flight this afternoon. Meanwhile, Skinner wants to meet with us before we go." Scully analyzed his attitude as she walked out of the room behind her. She questioned this change, but she welcomed it. At least now, they could go on as they had been. Nothing had changed and it was safe that way. Scully almost tripped on the long blue dress as she hurried across the grassy ground to help her mother with the huge torch she was trying unsuccessfully to put in the ground. Her mother had been planning this for weeks. It was Bill and Tara's anniversary and she wanted to surprise them with a lavish party. They were due in at the airport at 9:00 and the plan was for them to arrive at the house thinking the family was going out for a nice, fancy dinner at Chez Danielle. The backyard was exquisite. Her mother had spared no expense. The grassy lawn was outlined with dozens of torches and candles. There were buffet tables at the right and the left overwhelmed with food and dining tables draped with white linen tableclothes with huge flowered centerpieces, a lot of hooplah for the 40 or so people she had invited if you asked Scully. "Dana, go in and check to make sure the flight landed on time, would you?" Scully slowly started towards the house. The wind blew and she leaned her head back and looked up at the stars starting to appear in the sky as she felt the warm air brush against her skin. She closed her eyes and heard the soft sounds of the band behind her tuning up. She opened the door and walked past the catering staff in the kitchen directly to the phone in the living room. Her mother rushed in the door. On the way up the stairs she yelled down. "Everything's finished outside, honey. People should be arriving soon. I'm going upstairs to get dressed." Scully hung up the phone. Good, everythings proceeding as planned. She sat back on the couch and stretched her legs. The barage of people started at about 7:30. Scully had done enough greeting to last her a lifetime when the doorbell rung yet again. She took a deep breath, put on her hostess face and opened the door. He took her breath away. Mulder was standing there in a black tuxedo that was made just for him. Scully stood for a moment in sheer astonishment. He was so handsome. It shocked her. She had become accustomed to his good looks, so much so that she barely even noticed them anymore. But there he stood with those hazel eyes looking intently at her and she couldn't speak. "Are you sure I should be here?" Mulder leaned over and whispered quietly to break the silence. "Of course you should be here. My mother invited you." "I know and you know I would do anything for your mother, but it's very obvious that your brother doesn't like me much." "I know he's said some harsh words, but...." "A selfish son-of-a-bitch, I believe, are the words he chose." "Be that as it may Mulder. You are welcome in this house and my brother has nothing to say about it." Scully stepped back to let him in. Mulder closed the door and followed her through the house and out the back door. Jazz filled the air as he took in the display. Scully and her mother knew how to throw a party. It was gorgeous. He watched Scully as she made her way through the crowd. She was so beautiful. Not just in the way she looked but the way she carried herself. She manuevered the distance with confidence and grace. Almost at every other step someone stopped her, she would give that winning smile share a few niceties and move on. The dress she wore fit her snuggly showing off her hour glass figure and the color made her blue eyes blaze. It had been a month since he had decided that he was tired of fighting her, but everytime he looked at her he wanted to forget that promise he had made to himself. I can do this, he said to himself and followed her over to where her mother stood. "Fox, I 'm so glad you could make it." "It was an honor to be invited to this little shindig Mrs. Scully. How could I possibly turn you down?" They were interrupted by a hurried caterer. "Mrs. Scully. It seems the guests of honor have arrived." "Oh, thank you. Dana and I will be right back." Mrs. Scully gave a signal to the band director and rushed towards the house with Scully right behind her. The doorbell rang. Mrs. Scully swung the door open and immediately hugged Tara first and then Bill. "How was your flight, Bill?" "Great Mom." He said as he hugged Scully. " Are you guys ready to go?" "There's been a slight change of plans, big brother. We've decided to stay home tonight. Follow me." Scully turned on her heels. When she got to the door she motioned for him and Tara to go ahead. "Dana, what are you and mom up to?" "Just shut up and go outside." Bill opened the door. "Congratulations on 15 years of wedding bliss." The band director said over the microphone and the yard erupted with applause. Tara turned and smiled at Scully with tears in her eyes. "Thank you so much Dana. You guys are so sweet to do this." "All in a days work, Tara. All in a days work." Scully descended the stairs just as the band started playing an old Miles Davis tune. Tara and Bill took to the dance floor. Mulder walked slowly up to Scully. "I love Miles. Want to dance, Agent Scully?" She looked up at him and hesitantly placed her hand in his. He led them out onto the dance floor, twirled her around and then placed his hand on her back as she put her hand on his shoulder. They started slowly, moving to the music until they got comfortable with their situation. Scully relaxed in his arms and Mulder tightened his arm around her. He looked down into her eyes and she looked up into his. The distance between them closed and their bodies almost merged into one. His hand slid down her back until it got to her hips and lingered there. Scully's hand moved up his shoulder and around to the back of his neck. She inadvertently leaned against him and despite her mind telling her not to, closed her eyes and leaned her face against his chest. Mulder sighed. It felt so good to hold her this close. All thoughts left his mind and there was just this moment. This dance. Scully felt his strong arms around her waist and couldn't remember why it was she kept pushing him away when it felt this good to be so close to him. Everything in the room disappeared except the music and this feeling that was overcoming them both. Scully looked up and Mulder reached up to touch her face just as the song was ending. They slowly released each other with their entertwined hands being the last to come apart. "Mulder, I . . . ." Scully began, before she could get it out the band director called her name over the microphone. "Will Ms. Dana Scully come up to give the toast for our lovely couple." "I... .have to go." "Then go." Mulder said. He smiled at her, sticking his hands in his pockets. He watched her slowly walk to the stage and climb the stairs. He then turned and walked quietly towards the house. Mulder walked into the huge lobby and pushed the elevator button. He had no business being here after all she had put him through, but he had to get Scully out of his system and this was the only way he could think of doing it. That dance tonight with Scully had made it abundantly clear that what he had been doing the past weeks was not working. He had to take a bold step. He had to force her out his head. Ding! The doors opened, he stepped inside and pushed floor nine. He pulled the bow tie loose from his neck and stuffed it into his tuxedo pocket. The doors opened and he walked quickly down the hall, knocking on the door of apartment 913. It was 12:00. He hoped she was still awake. The door opened. "Fox. What are you doing here?" Diana stood in the doorway draped in a pink satin robe rubbing sleep out of her eyes. "May I come in?" "Sure, but aren't you a little off the beat and path?" "I came to see you. Diana." Mulder walked in and turned around to face her. "Have a seat. What can I do for you?" "You can tell me if you were serious about us trying again."Mulder sat down on the couch. "Fox, I still love you." She said sitting down next to him. It was Mulder who made the move this time. He grabbed her face and pressed his lips against hers. His kisses were hurried and demanding. He raised and leaned them both back against the arm of the couch. Diana broke the kiss, breathless. "What changed your mind?" "Does it really matter?" He said between kisses on her cheek and neck. Diana eased the jacket off his shoulder and threw it across the room. She found the bottom of the shirt and expertly pulled it out of his pants. All the while exploring his mouth with her tongue. Mulder lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bedroom. He layed her on the bed and followed her down till he was on top of her. He kissed her neck and reached for the belt on her robe. Something in his mind screamed. No! Don't do this! He froze. What was he doing? What was he thinking? This wouldn't make it go away. The realization banged like a drum in his head. "What is it, Fox?" Diana looked at him, her eyes full of lust. "I... I can't do this." He rose and backed away from the bed. "What's wrong?" "I'm sorry Diana. I'm sorry I did this. But I can't go through with it." He walked out of the bedroom and grabbed his jacket off the floor. Diana jumped off of the bed and followed him. "What do you mean? You came to me. You knocked on the door, Fox. You wanted me." She grabbed him and made him look at her. "That's the thing, Diana. It wasn't you I wanted." He said and started for the door. "Stop! How can you come in here and make me believe that we're going to start again and then leave me for her!" She screamed at his back. "I love her. Diana. I love her in a way I never loved you." "But you were supposed to hate her. You were supposed to love me. " Mulder turned and looked at her. "What the hell does that mean, Diana? Why am I supposed to love you? What are saying to me?" Mulder walked up to her and grabbed her shoulders. "Nothing, Fox. I meant nothing." He looked into her eyes and saw it. "Your part of this aren't you? Your working for them!" She tried to get away from him, but he wouldn't let her go. "Tell me, damn it. Tell me the truth!" She dropped her eyes and slowly opened her mouth. "I was assigned to you to make you fall in love with me. He wanted you to follow me. He thought he could control you through your love for me. But I fell in love with you Fox. That's why I was reassigned." "Who is he? What's his name?" Mulder yelled. "I only know his last name. Spender." He let go of her and backed away. Scully was right. She had been playing him the whole time, from the beginning. Worst of all, he was being manipulated by that black-lunged bastard. Diana walked towards him and tried to touch him. "Don't touch me. You were never real. I loved a hologram." "Don't say that. I did love you." "Tell me. Diana. How the fuck am I supposed to believe that now!" "Because I told you the truth. Please, don't hate me." "You had to tell me the truth. You screwed up. What was the plan this time, huh? To make me leave Scully for you? To drive a wedge between us, so you could have me all to yourself? You manipulative bitch!" He slammed the door behind him. Scully was right. Scully had been right the whole time. He had been played for the fool. It made so much since to him now as he tore out of the apartment building looking in his jacket pocket for his car keys. Diana left him so he would leave the x-files to follow her. He had to tell Scully. He had to tell her he was sorry for not believing in her. For doubting her for one moment. The party had been over for an hour now. She had to be just arriving at her apartment. He would meet her there and beg for her forgiveness. He sped out of the parking lot. He took the stairs instead of the elevator to make sure he would get there before she had settled in for bed. Breathless, he arrived at her door and pounded. He didn't hear the usual movement that he always heard when he knocked on her door late at night. There was silence. She had to be here. He pulled out his cell phone and called her mother's house. "Hello." Mrs. Scully answered. "Mrs. Scully. It's Fox. Is Dana there by any chance?" "No, Fox. She left about two hours ago. She's not at her apartment?" "I'm sure she is. I just thought I'd call there first and make sure she'd left." He didn't want to worry her. "I'll try her there." He hung up the phone and found her key on his key ring. He unlocked the door and stepped inside. The apartment was dark. He opened the door to the bedroom and the bed was made up. Where the hell is she? Okay, don't panic. There's an explanation for this. Hell, she could be at your place. He pulled his cell phone out again and called home. The phone rang for the third time and the answering machine picked up. Check your messages. I'm sure she left a message. He pushed one and the pleasant automated voice on the other line told him he had two messages. The first one was from his mother. He saved the message and went on to the next one. He froze when he heard Scully's voice. "Mulder, it's me. I didn't want you to worry. I've gone out of town for a few days. I need to think. I can't do that here. I'll call you when I get back. Oh, and Mulder I didn't want you trying to call me so I left my cell phone here. I promise I'll call when I get back." The answering machine beeped and Mulder sat down on the couch. She can't leave now. He needed to talk to her, to tell her he had been stupid. He had to tell her he was sorry and that he would never question her again. At least, not on the important things. He wondered if she might tell her mother where she was when she called to tell her she was out of town. On second thought, leave her alone she'll call when she gets back and you can tell her then. She'll be back in a couple of days. He could wait that long. He closed the door behind him, started back down the hall and realized that was easier said than done. Surrender (3/3) by too_divine and fantasy1ni94 It had been a hard four days without Scully. Mulder read file upon file and had stayed at the office almost every night trying to banish her from his thoughts. It never worked. He always wondered where she was, what she was doing. Something about her leaving him alone, only for a little while, unsettled him. Even when every now and then she went out by herself on cases, he would always find himself calling her cell phone just to hear her voice. He would be doing that now if she hadn't left it in her apartment to make sure to cut off all communication between the two of them. He pushed the double doors to his apartment building open and trudged in. She really had to hurry up and come back before he lost all self-control and hunted her down. The elevator doors opened and he stepped in with the old lady who lived in the apartment just below him. He knew her face only because she had several times come up to ask him to stop bouncing "that god-damned basketball all the god-damned time." He wondered what she was doing out so late but thought better of asking her and leaving himself open to a hateful stare. The doors opened and she slowly stepped off. Mulder pushed the close door button several times until the doors finally did what they were told and rode the rest of the way up to his floor. He stepped out and walked the hallway a little faster than he usually did. All he wanted to do was go to sleep and try not to dream about her. He recovered the keys from his pocket and shoved them into the door. Before he got all the way in he dropped his mail on the table next to him and dropped his coat on the floor. The door slammed behind him. The sound echoed through the empty, dark apartment. He shimmied out of his jacket and pulled at his tie. "Mulder." Her voice startled him. Scully was sitting on the couch in the darkness watching him. "Scully. When did you get back?" He turned on the lamp sitting on the desk next to her. "I came straight from the airport here. I think I need to explain myself to you. Explain why I've been acting the way I have and I wanted to do it before I lost my nerve." He looked tired. She knew immediately that he hadn't slept. She had a feeling it was because of her. "I'm listening." Mulder sat down on the couch next to her. She took a deep breath. "Mulder, I..." She looked down at the carpet and looked back up at him again."I've been thinking these past few days about my life and my work and your role in it." She stood up and walked over to the window so she didn't have to look at him. "And I think I've come to a conclusion that I can't seem to shake." Mulder sat on the couch and waited for the next series of words. After a long silence, he grew impatient. "Do you plan to share with the rest of the class?" The street lights outside shined in through the blinds and marked her face with blue lines of light as she spoke. "When I was first assigned to you I thought you were a joke. Did you know that Mulder? I thought they had given me a bull-shit assignment just to appease me and satisfy some affirmative action policy they hadn't quite satisfied yet. But the more I worked with you the more I came to respect you and the work. But you know that part of it. Let me tell you the part you don't know. The more I worked with you the more you became a fixture in my life. You became my best friend, my protector, my champion. The one who could read what I was thinking without me saying anything. My mother can't do that and she gave birth to me." Tears welled up in her eyes and she fought them back. Mulder wanted to go to her, but he knew somehow if he moved it would keep her from saying what she needed to say to him. So, he sat quietly and gave her his full attention. "At first it scared me to have someone that tuned in to what was in my head, so I tried to back up, put some kind of wall up between us. It was useless. You always found someway to get in. Then I welcomed it. Not having to actually vocalize every thought in my head, knowing that someone knew me better than I did myself. Then, just as I got accustomed to it, I realize that I relied on it. I had worked so hard at not needing anyone and it worked until I met you. You enter my life and I start needing your presence, the way you turned my calm life upside down with your all consuming plight, your insight, and what scared me most of all your approval. Slowly you became a part of me I couldn't cut loose. You became the erratic part of me. The part that acts spontaniously. The part that lives by emotion. The parts that I would not allow myself to be. And it scares me, Mulder. It frightens the hell out of me. Sometimes I sit and think what am I without you? What would happen to my life if you weren't in it? I've never been in that position before. I am just so tied to you. My family sees it. That's why I think my brother hates you so much. He sees that I have no choice but to follow you, to be there with you. And he hates that he can't do anything to stop it. He sees what I don't want to see. What I have been fighting." Scully stopped. She'd shocked herself with the words. She turned from the window she had so long been looking out of and looked at Mulder. She was trying to read his face, how much damage she had done with that statement. Mulder face did not change. They had been here too many times before. This very same tension and silence, every time it seemed they might finally break through the wall between them. He waited a moment for her to say something else. He was nothing if not patient when it came to Dana Scully. "What are you fighting, Scully?" The tears came then. She turned away from him and turned back to the window. She didn't want to say the words. If she said the words it would be real. She would be giving up control of the last thing should could control. The words would seal their fate. The words would change everything. Her hands shook at the prospect. Mulder stood and walked over to her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and brushed her hair over to one side. "Scully." He whispered in her ear. It sent shivers down her spine. Him saying her name always did. "Scully, it's okay." She turned around and looked at him. He was so close. He had never been this close before. She lifted her hand and touched his face. His eyes penetrated her soul. She jumped away from him, pushing his arms away. "No Mulder, it's not okay!" "What is it, Scully. What is it? Tell me! I'm tired of this. One minute you act as if I'm the most important thing in the world to you and then you act like you can't stand me! "Mulder, you already know I care for you. Your my best friend, my partner." Tears welled up in her eyes again, but this time she couldn't stop the dam from bursting. "Damn that. Tell me the truth! Stop trying to hide everything you feel and tell me the truth!" "What do you want to hear Mulder! That I love you, that I dream about you holding me, making love to me, that I can't picture my life without you!" Scully stopped abruptly, her eyes wide. She covered her mouth in shock. The words had poured out of her before she could stop them. Mulder softened, walked towards her again and placed his hand on her cheek, wiping the salty water from her face. "No, don't do that!" Scully stepped back. "I can't touch you. You tell me you love me and I can't touch you?" "When you touch me Mulder I can't think straight. I love you okay, I can't escape that, but I can't be with you. I can't do all those things. Their just dreams." She looked at him and the tears came again. Mulder dipped his head and kissed the tears on her face away. His hand smoothed her hair and then traced the outline of her lips. "Why? What is keeping us apart? Why can't I hold you, Scully?" "We can't do this. There are too many implications. Can you just once think about how this is going to affect us? The job has rules about this. Do you know how hard I worked to get to where I am now? To be taken seriously? As soon as word gets out, my reputation goes out the door. All the sudden I'm Mulder's little chikadee. I don't want that. I don't want people to look at us and see lovers not partners. Oh and Skinner! Can you imagine us trying to report on an assignment? He'd always be wondering if our opinion has been compromised because of our relationship. Let alone these men, Mulder. These men and this conspiracy they've constructed. They target me now because I'm your partner. Imagine what they'd do to either one of us if they knew we were in a relationship. They'd use it as leverage to stop us from learning the whole truth." "Scully, all those points are valid here, but honestly, do you think willing us to remain plutonic partners is going to work? Trust me, I've tried it. I tried it for your sake. These men you speak of already know I love you. I can't hide it. You were targeted because of that. They infected you with that virus because they knew nothing else mattered to me if you weren't there. I have a feeling Skinner knew are feelings for each other before we knew them. And the bureau? Rumours have been going around the bureau about you being Mrs. Spooky for years. You just don't know about them. Not to mention the fact, no matter how hard I try to get you off of my mind and convince myself that I can live without your love, your touch. You prove me wrong. You walk into my office and all I know is you. That stubborn look you get when your sure that your right, your walk, the way you demand mine and everyone else's attention, your beautiful face, the curve of your hips. It's all there. I can't shake it. I can't erase my feelings for you. Even if you decide to walk away from me now they will still be there." He gently brought her hand up to his lips. "Do you know how much I want to kiss you?" He whispered. Scully shivered when he brushed his lips across the palm of her hand. "We just can't Mulder. There are too many complications. Besides I'm not sure that it's just me you want. You want Diana too. You feel something for her." Mulder looked deeply into her eyes. "Correction Scully, I used to feel something for her. After the party, I went over to Diana's with the intention of making love to her." Scully's eyes widened, but she waited. "I was trying to force you out of my head and my heart, Scully. I thought whatever I thought we had was a lie and your so stubborn. I tried to get you to see it and you kept pushing me away. I couldn't go through with it. We were in the bedroom and I couldn't go through with it. She wasn't you and I wanted you. But you are right about one thing, Scully. I was wrong about her. I should have trusted my love for you right now in the present instead of dwelling in the past. She was a plant. I found out that night that CGB put her in my life to control me. She was never real. Our love was never real. This is real. I've only wanted one woman for the past six years of my life and that is real." A single tear escaped Scully's baby blue eyes. Mulder caught the tear with a finger and brushed it from her face. She stood for a long time motionless just looking at him. He slowly opened his arms to her and she let him hold her. He slowly ran his hand through her crimson hair as she looked up to take in the sight of him standing here loving her with all her faults and insecurities, loving her completely. He lowered his head and gently brushed his lips across her neck, slowly dragging his bottom lip across her collar bone. Slowly and carefully, he kissed her neck in the strategic spots he chose as she forced herself to breath. This cannot happen. Her head was screaming for her to move, but her legs would not get the message. "This thing .. . .we have, Scully. It's too . . . . .powerful. We . . .can't . . .deny . . .it. We .. .can't .....run . ....from .....it. We've .. ..got ...to ....give ...it ...a ....chance." Mulder spoke between kisses to her neck, in that low tone that he usually reserved for their more intimate conversations about cases. All the sudden none of it mattered. None of it. She would go to the ends of the earth for this man, do anything. All she wanted to do was be with him, love him the way he was loving her now. She took both of her hands, placed them on his face and guided his head up for a kiss. When it seemed their lips would touch, he bypassed her mouth and whispered in her ear. "All I want is you." Then finally their lips touched. Scully opened her lips and surrendered to the feeling. The pure sensation of kissing the man she had waited so long to kiss. Their tongues battled for control. Each exploring the other's mouth, uncovering all the secrets, all the desires that were hidden there. After it seemed eternity, they broke breathless. He buried his face in her neck as she ran her fingers through his hair pulling him closer. "Who knows me better than you, Scully? Who knows my moods better than you? You know how to sooth my pain, make the nightmares go away. You say I can read you like noone can, that's true for you too. Noone knows every part of me like you do. You don't think I'm scared of that, Scully? You don't think that frightens the hell out of me? I'm scared of what will happen to me if I should ever lose you. I held back because of that in the beginning, but I realized that it didn't matter whether we were lovers or partners. I would still love you. I would still hurt if you were gone. I was already tied to you. There was noone else. We've got to seize this and never let it go. It means too much." He whispered. "I love you. And I can't fight it anymore. I'm tired of fighting it." She whispered back. He smiled at her and she held on to him for dear life, never wanting to let him go. He sighed and inhaled the smell of her. She looked into his eyes and then jumped abruptly. "You knew I would change my mind, didn't you?" "I gave you enough factual evidence to prove my viewpoint. You couldn't dispute it. Besides I locked the door, you weren't going anywhere until you gave me what I wanted." Scully laughed and kissed the top of his forehead. "You do know me well." She released him and walked towards the bedroom. "Where are you going?" He missed her kisses already. "Your not the only one here who wants something. I thought we might close the deal. Remember a relationship is give and take, and right now I want something from you." She said as she walked. She reached down and pulled her shirt over her head and threw it on the floor. "Keep going, FBI woman." He said and she did. As she reached the doorway, she turned around to look at him. "Are you coming?" "Ooh, I love bossy women." He hurried over to her and wrapped her in his arms. Her skin was electric. She pulled him tighter and he picked her up. Her legs wrapped around his hips and they kissed as he walked deeper into the bedroom. "Promise me something." She said grabbing his face and looking deeply into his hazel eyes. "I'll promise you anything." "Promise me that you'll never leave me." "I never will." He said and closed the door. === "Nothing happens in contradiction to nature, only in contradiction to what we know of it." -Scully, "The X-Files" Darrya, "The Divine One"