From: little_princess_1014@hotmail.com
Date: Sun, 26 Aug 2001 18:36:35 GMT
Subject: Three Shippers (1/1) by Kip-chan
Source: atxc

**Title: Three Shippers
**Author: Kip
**Rating: G
**Disclaimer: Chris Carter owns himself. The actors and actresses own
themselves. I own the three shippers. 
**Summary: It's another Friday at the Three Shippers' weekly party.
Introduces the Three Shippers (Piper Hendryn, Grace "Red" Grietz, and
Mindy Carlson). 
**Note: revised version; some archives may have the earlier versions
of this and its two sequels. If you want, replace 'em, but I don't
know how you're going to like the plot twist in part IV, so...
**Note the second: This is a parody. That means you may find some
things that poke fun at shippers. *insane giggle* That's on purpose...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

October 14, 1999

Romantic music blared from the speakers of the boom box as we, the
members of the Three Shippers, giggled and typed at the computer. It
was another Friday afternoon, and we were fighting for control of the
computer. "Hey! Move over!" I shouted. "Piper, you're hogging the
keyboard!"

"Red Grietz, lighten up. I just wanna finish one last paragraph..."
Piper begged. "Please? Then you can take over, I promise."

"Are you writing the kiss scene?" asked the third member, Mindy. "I
dibsed it, remember?"

"Mindy, we would never do a thing like that... at least, I wouldn't.
Now Piper, here, that's a different story!" I grinned. "She's
ruthless, isn't that right, Piper?"

"Pot's calling the kettle black," Piper grumbled. 

"You're both nuts," Mindy pronounced. "Now, where are we in the story?
Short recap, not long, please."

"Well," Piper said. "So far, Mulder and Scully have been sent to the
Himalayas, gotten lost, gotten found, gotten attacked by crazed
Consortium members, and they're now cowering in an abandoned summer
house, built by a rich family."

"Hot tub?" I asked, sucking on a lollipop.

"Hot tub!" Piper cried gleefully. We shrieked and clapped our hands.
All three of us did our secret shipper handshake, which of course, I
can't repeat here, otherwise it wouldn't be a secret. 

We're the only members of the Three Shippers, a little fan club that
writes fanfic about "The X-Files," a show on Fox that airs Sunday
nights. Since Sundays are school nights, we meet on Fridays instead,
watching the episode of the week before and then blasting our favorite
music while writing. The parties go from 2:23 in the afternoon on
Friday to 10:13 in the morning on Saturday. 

Piper Hendryn is the one who always hosts the parties, probably
because her house is the biggest, and she has her own attic devoted to
"The X-Files." Posters, magazines, videos, the TV, and the computer
are scattered around the space. I'm the one in charge of handling our
collective Blockbuster account. I make sure that we can snag a copy of
every shippy episode already out on video. Mindy Carlson is our
computer genius. Not only did she create a page, she put it up
herself, and loaded it with all kinds of goodies. 

Piper gave up her seat at the keyboard to Mindy, whose turn it was to
type. Mindy sat down, cracked her knuckles, and said, "Mood music?" 

"Check," I said, turning the volume on the boom box up.

"Atmosphere?" she asked, and Piper lit a few candles. 

"Check," Piper said.

"And... we're all set. Chapter 18," Mindy typed. 

~~~~~

My watch beeped at four in the afternoon. "Hey, dudes," I said,
tapping Piper and Mindy on the shoulders. "Come on, it's time for a
snack break."

Dutifully the other two struggled to their feet. We left the attic
through the trap door in Piper's room and exited her room. Piper led
the way downstairs and straight into the kitchen. We danced into the
kitchen, on a quest for some sunflower seeds. 

"Here they are!" crowed Mindy from behind a barrel. She reached in and
drew out a handful as proof. "Mmmm, where's the baggies?"

"Right here," Piper said, whipping three velvet pouches from her
pocket. "Hey, if you two weren't in such an MSR haze, you'd have
remembered. As it was, my head was the clearest, so I decided to snag
'em for you."

"Thanks, Piper," Mindy and I said, each of us taking a black pouch.
The bags had our names on them, so we'd know whose was whose. (You try
remembering how much was in your bag after typing five chapters of
romantic drivel - oops, a tale of true love...) We grabbed spoons from
the silver drawer and began to scoop seeds into the bags. Within
minutes they were filled. 

"Now what?" I asked, brushing a few strands of chin-length red hair
back from my face. "It's too early to watch more episodes, since they
have to last 20 hours."

"What say we go outside?" Piper suggested.

"Fine by me," I shrugged. "Mindy?"

"Let's go!" she said, turning and bounding back up the stairs. With a
giggle and a grin, Piper and I raced to catch up.

Up in her room, we put our imitation FBI jackets on (instead of FBI,
the jackets had T3S on them) and put on matching black sneakers. Those
were the only ways to tell that we were members of the Three Shippers,
really. I was dressed in my favorite "Welsh cake" T-shirt and blue
jeans. Mindy was all in black- a black shirt with a small furry calico
cat on it, and black jeans. Piper, our wild child, had her FAO Schwarz
shirt on (the one that said "shut up and play" on the back) and jeans.


Faster than you could say, "The truth is out there," we were gone
again.

~~~~~

The cool October air provided just the right amount of crispness in
the air. I breathed in and sighed. It was October 14th, the day after
Fox Mulder's birthday. This, of course, was a special occasion, and to
celebrate, we were headed in the direction of Shipper's Spot, a
clearing in the forest that linked Piper's, Mindy's, and my house.
There was one big rock to sit on, as well as several tall trees, and a
pit in the middle of the rock. It was perfect for a small fire or for
burning incense. 

As soon as we reached the clearing, I grabbed some incense and some
matches, Piper brought the blankets to the rock, and Mindy filled the
pit with mulch. We lit three sticks of incense- raspberry for me,
sandalwood for Piper, and cinnamon for Mindy. 

"So, what'cha wanna do?" I asked.

"Let's play 'Going to LA,'" suggested Mindy. 

"Great idea!" Piper said. 

"Going to LA" is our own version of that children's game where you
have to tell what you would pack for a trip to Grandma's, except in
our version, you don't have to remember what everybody else said. We
could always dredge up some really weird items. Hey, we're 16, we're
not kiddiewinks anymore.

"I'll start," Mindy announced. "I'm going to LA, and I'm packing...
'Ascension/One Breath,'" she said, naming two episodes on tape.

"I'm packing... a bazillion bags of sunflower seeds!" Piper declared,
waving her own velvet pouch.

"I'm packing a camera," I said. "Hey, you never know when Nicholas Lea
will show up!"

"Drool moment," called Piper, and we sat there, tongues lolling out,
for a little while. We took the time to revel in that which is
adoration for the actor Nicholas Lea and his character, Alex Krycek.
We're all big fans. In fact, we have a framed and autographed picture
of him. Unfortunately, we didn't get it autographed ourselves. But
hey, it's a great picture. Mmmm, that one outfit, the T-shirt, jeans,
and black leather jacket, that look always kills me...

"Mindy, your turn," Piper said after a while.

"'Duane Barry,'" she said, referring to yet another episode. 

"'Elegy,'" Piper supplied.

"Frohike and Fox Mulder," I said. 

"Gilligan, comma, Vince," Mindy said, enunciating each word. We all
sighed, thinking of the most shipper-friendly writer on the show. 

Piper put on her panic face. "Hybrid repellent," she said. We laughed.

"'Ice,'" I said. Hmmm, two or three could play at this episode game.

"Jana Cassidy's resignation notice," Mindy said. 

"I wish!" Piper called. Then her face lit up. "My turn, and I'm
bringing Krycek... in that hot outfit we all love!"

"Drool break, part 2," I called. Another few minutes passed, and it
was my turn.

"Langly, of course," I said.

"Melissa's New Age stuff," Mindy said.

"Nick Lea!" Piper said. "Oh yeah, two in a row!" She stood up and did
a little dance of joy. But before we could get any further, she gasped
and sat back down.

"Piper?" asked Mindy.

"Somebody's coming!" she hissed. "Quietly now, pack up and let's blow
this pop stand!" We blew out the incense, swept the rock free of all
traces of mulch and ash, and put everything away. We tiptoed away from
the clearing and were on our way out when the voices started. 

"Oh no," Mindy moaned, "we're toast."

Our only choice was to hide and remain absolutely still. I found us a
spot with a good view to the clearing, and we sat down. The sight that
met our eyes was only the most astonishing one we could have asked
for.

"Chris Carter?" we asked, whispering, in unison. And it was, indeed,
the creator of our favorite show. 

"What's he doing here?" asked Piper.

"Let's find out," I said, shushing my companions and leaving the
hideout. I stepped into the clearing to find Chris Carter scribbling
in what appeared to be his journal. Piper and Mindy were just behind
me.

"Mr. Carter?" I asked. He turned to see us watching him.

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I trespassing?" he asked, getting off the rock.

"No, no, you're fine where you are. We were just wondering why you
were here, that's all," Mindy said. 

Holding up his journal, he said, "Getting new ideas, that's what.
Writer's block happens to the best of us, you know." He offered his
hand. "Please, call me Chris," he said. I shook his hand.

"Certainly," I said. "I'm Red and these are my friends Piper and
Mindy."

"Nice to meet you," Chris said. "I guess you know who I am, huh?"

"God in our universe," joked Mindy.

"Fans of 'The X-Files?'" Chris asked, sarcastically.

"Now there's the understatement of the year," supplied Piper.
"Especially when the episodes give the shippers what they want..."

Mindy elbowed Piper. "Ix-nay on the ipper-shay," she said out of the
corner of her mouth.

Chris began to chuckle. "You three are part of that illustrious fandom
called shippers, huh? I get all sorts of requests from them. Please
don't try to maul me, I'm only human, and I have other things to
consider," he pleaded.

"No problem," I said, "on one condition."

Chris looked ill. "What's that?"

Piper, Mindy, and I all said, "Let us watch the filming of an episode
with Krycek and you've got three obedient fans."

Chris actually looked relieved. "Is that all?"

Piper opened her mouth to say something, but Mindy pushed it closed.
"That's all, sir."

"Done," Chris said. "Now, do you know where I can get something to
eat? I'm starved."

Piper put on what she called her "company" face. "It just so happens
my house is down that path," she said. "Won't you follow me?"

~~~~~

"Bye, Chris!" we called to the retreating God of The X-Files as he
walked down the driveway. It was 6pm already, and almost time for
Piper's parents to get home from work. All four of us had enjoyed a
meal consisting of pizza and Coke, and had time left over to compare
favorite episodes. 

But now it was time to bid farewell to our guest. As he left the
vicinity, we shut the door and breathed a sigh of relief. "Wow, what a
day," we chorused.

As we trudged up the stairs, Piper said, "I've been a bad, bad girl."

"Why's that?" I asked.

Piper produced a little leather-covered book labeled "future
episodes."

"PIPER!" Mindy and I screamed. 

"Come on, we can read it while we watch the movie," Piper said, taking
the lead. With bouncing steps, we reentered Piper's room and climbed
to the attic.

It was just another Friday night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to be continued (in the sequel)