From: "Ms. AM" Date: Thu, 16 Nov 2000 04:46:55 -0500 Subject: NEW: Thy Rod and Thy Staff (PG) Title: Thy Rod and Thy Staff Author: Ms. AM Email: ALMowry@pathway.net Rating: PG Category: V Keywords: Angst, MSR, CD Archive: ATXC, Ephemeral, Gossamer etc. always. Disclaimer: Don't own them, never will...rats! Summary: What happens when you don't accept change? (Probably not this, but what the hey. *G*) Authors Notes: I've labeled this a character death even though you might not feel that is actually what happens in this weird little fic I couldn't get out of my head. You be the judge. Thy Rod and Thy Staff (1/1) Dec. 24, 2050 I am an old woman now. My once vibrant golden-red hair is now white and sparse with age. My eyes, once a sparkling blue, are no more. They are dull now, looking like the sky over the sea just before a storm. My bones have become frail and my muscles weak...I am tired. So tired. A fire burns in the fireplace, yet I wrap my blanket around me tighter. It's so hard to keep warm...I've felt cold for so long now. I watch the yellow, orange and red flames dance for me, it is comforting and I know I must sleep. So I do. It isn't a deep sleep and I hear the footsteps behind me. Even though the sound is no longer the same I still know who it is. I don't even have to look. "Why are you here?" 'I love you.' The voice speaks to my mind rather than my ears. "Perhaps once...you did," I shake my head. "But you left me." 'You know that's not true. Not the way you're making it sound.' I finally turn around, my lips are dry and I wet them. "You did. You promised me you'd never leave me..." 'Oh, Scully...my love.' "You left and so did they," I sigh. "Go away, Mulder." 'Please, please come with me. There isn't much time left.' "I know." March 17, 2001 We are wrapped in one another feeling happy and sated after making love for the first time since Mulder's return. His progress had been slow, but steady...the emotional finally at one with the physical. He attended all my natural childbirth classes even when he was too weak to do anything but listen, insisting he would be ready when the time came. My mother came with us and as Mulder grew stronger she did less and he did more...until it was almost like she hadn't been there at all. He keeps rubbing my rounded belly, he has become quite proficient in effluerage. I think it soothes him and our unborn child in one fell swoop, or caress as the case seems to be. I know it won't be long until I'm asleep as well. March 20, 2001 He's standing at the window. Staring at the stars, again. "Mulder come to bed, I'm cold." I beckon. He doesn't look at me and almost seems reluctant to leave his post, but he does finally crawl in the bed. His skin is like ice and I remember, I remember his promise. The promise I made him make. "Don't ever leave me again, promise me Mulder." "I promise Scully. I won't ever leave you behind...not ever." My head is resting on his chest, his heart beating a steady rhythm in against my ear. "Mulder?" "Hmmm..." "You did mean it...didn't you?" "Mean what, Scully?" "Your promise, Mulder. Did you mean your promise?" His hand strokes my hair, "I meant it, Scully." I press a soft kiss to his flesh, before murmuring, "Ok." But as the night wears on and sleep doesn't come to me, I don't have to look to know his attention has drifted back to the window. And the dark sky beyond. June 7, 2004 The threat, the change doesn't come from the sky. Nor from the Earth or sea. It comes from within. The day is beautiful. One to remember. My back is hurting and my feet swollen, but the discomfort is alleviated by watching Mulder and our son frolicking in the surf. I hear Mulder say in a conspiratorial tone, "Let's go get mommy, Noah." "M'kay, Daddy." Noah laughs as Mulder swings him up into his arms, they run toward me and fall playfully onto the blanket beside me. Mulder leans over for a kiss and I oblige. "Me too!" Noah cries out, and we both cover him with tiny kisses until he's giggling non-stop. Noah yawns and curls up between us, his eyes closing and his thumb in his mouth. Mulder reaches over and places his hand on my stomach, fingers splayed out encompassing as much as he can. "And how's my 'Easy-Bake' doing today?" I find it so hard to be mad at him, when he's grinning like that. Even though I truly dislike his 'bun in the oven' comment. Leave it to Mulder to come up with slang for slang. I finally cover his hand with my own, "We are doing fine. Especially considering I thought Noah was my one and only chance. This is precious to me because you've been with me, us, from the beginning." "It's precious to me too, Scully. You, Noah and this one--are my life." I feel tears brimming and pull Mulder in for a kiss. Actually for several kisses. There is a humming and the sky turns lavender, red, silver, gold and even green. Until finally it's littered with hundreds of rainbows, all arcing from one place to another. I look around at all the other tourists on the beach. They are standing, staring in awe. Mulder stands and looks skyward. He smiles. "It's time, Scully." He helps me up, "Time for what, Mulder?" "Don't worry, Scully. We're all going to be together," He bends down and gently shakes Noah awake. Unlike me, Noah is a quick riser and he stands between Mulder and I. Noah grabs my hand, "Don't be 'fraid, Mommy." Afraid of what, I wonder. The people are changing, it's like a mirage almost, hazy and indistinct. Human skin is shed, dissolved or absorbed. Leather like skin, and large oval eyes...it's aliens. Aliens...we all are, aliens. The children raise their arms and are lifted off the ground, carried on invisible wings up into the clouds. They change as they fly higher each bursting into a bright white light. Poof...and they're gone. Beams of blue light spill from the strange sky, the new aliens step into the beams and are transported up and away. I begin to shiver...my child's hand has turned from soft ivory skin. It now feels slick, textured and leathery. I no longer feel four fingers and a thumb. Looking down I see large black oval eyes, staring back at me. I drop the strange hand, and those black eyes seem so sad, black liquid runs down the creatures face. 'Mommy...mommy what's wrong?' I grab my head. Out, get out of my mind. Mulder grabs me, shakes me slightly, "Scully, calm down it's ok. We'll go together." I look into his hazel eyes and I watch until he is no longer human. I wrench myself from it's grasp and start backing away. 'Scully? Scully what are you doing?' No no no, this can't be happening. This can't be real. 'Scully, please accept this. Please believe...' I swipe at the tears coursing down my face. "I can't." One of the blue beams moves, engulfing what was Mulder and my son, my beautiful Noah. 'I love you, Scully.' 'Mommy! Mommy! Please mommy...' Two bursts of light and they're both gone. I am alone on a once crowded beach. April 23, 2005 There are very few humans left. My daughter, our daughter is nine months old now. She is the last baby to have been born on the planet Earth. Of the remaining humans, that I know of, there have been no pregnancies. Amber Marie Mulder. She is so special to me. She's all I have left. I can hear her, now, laughing in that tinkling way that babies do. I walk into her room and I am frozen. She sits, staring out the window, her little hands reaching out for something. "Amber...baby," I gasp out. She turns her head, looking at me with her father's eyes. 'Come to daddy, baby girl, it's ok.' My daughter becomes a ball of light, crackling with sparks of energy, electricity, it hovers within an arms reach of me. If I touch it...will she stay with me. I start to reach out, but pause when Mulder's voice echoes in my mind. 'Believe Scully...just believe and we can be together, all of us. Noah and I miss you so.' I close my eyes and when I open them, I am alone. Dec. 24, 2050 'Scully, please. We need you. Noah needs you. Amber needs you. And *I* need you...please don't make me lose you.' "Don't you see Mulder. I don't want to accept this change, I don't want to forget my belief in God...I can't." I close my eyes in resignation. 'Scully...don't do this,' he pleads. I feel hands touching mine, opening my eyes I see Mulder...as I remember him. I would think him perfectly real if not for the fact I can see through him, he looks like a ghost. I feel dizzy, it's getting so hard for me to breathe a struggle I'm ready to relinquish. My sight is fuzzy, I blink a couple times and see Mulder crying. "Don't cry, Mulder." 'I can't help it, Scully.' "Did you come all the way from the Starlight just to be with me at the end, Mulder? Is that where you are now?" He pulls me to him, he feels real and solid. He's warm and smells just like I remember. 'I came for you, Scully. Just accept what's within you, give up your control. Let go of the things in your mind and just accept. Become what we are.' "Kiss me, Mulder," I beg. His lips close over mine and for a moment I feel young and beautiful, desire courses through me. 'Yes my love, you and I we can have that again, come with me.' "I want to believe...The lord is my shepherd; I shall not want..." 'No, Scully no! That isn't the way!' I grasp his hands, my grip strong and sure. "Pray with me, Mulder and don't stop...promise me you won't stop!" Our eyes lock and our voices join. "He maketh me to lie down in green pastures." 'He leadeth me beside the still waters.' "He restoreth my soul." 'He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.' "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for though art with me..." I reach my weakening hand up and stroke Mulder's cheek, perhaps for the last time. "I love you." 'Scully? Scully? Oh...NO NO NO...shhhh, baby...' 'Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I...she will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.' One life extinguished. 'I didn't stop, Scully. I kept praying just like I promised.' "Yes you did, Mulder. Thank you." 'Scully?' "Yes." Four lives reunited. The End....