From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org Date: 6 Aug 2002 03:26:42 -0000 Subject: "To Believe in Forever" by Starrlyte Source: direct Reply To: Starrlyte1013x@aol.com "To Believe in Forever" Author: Starrlyte Rating: PG Category: MSR Spoilers: Truth Summary: "It was as if in a dream, she remained hopelessly and endlessly falling. One heartache after another, pounding her tender flesh over the span of a thousand lifetimes." Author's Notes: I had wanted to write something heartfelt and terribly sad. Of course when I sit down to write, it kind of comes out as is. I do hope you like as I haven't written in awhile. I only hope that what you take from it, is a sense of peace with the finale and a renewed hope for your own future. Disclaimer: All things X belong to Chris Carter and 1013 Productions. Thank you Chris for sitting down in your swim trunks one day to write the greatest characters of television history. Here's lookin at you kid. Here we go.... "To Believe in Forever" by Starrlyte Somewhere in the here and now between light and dark, her wearied mind floats, blurred by visions of the past. Falling. It was as if in a dream, she remained hopelessly and endlessly falling. One heartache after another, pounding her tender flesh over the span of a thousand lifetimes. Tears of immersurable woe spill forth from her convulsing body as she lies in his arms. For years she had shied from his comfort, even feared it only to learn that it was the only true thing she had ever known. And each time she felt herself falling, a hand was there to pull her back. He holds her carefully now, afraid to shatter her tear stained heart as she lays there wondering what it would have been like to have a normal life. The house in the suburbs with a white picket fence, a golden retreiver romping playfully with her toddler, a pickup truck and Jeep parked in the driveway. A husband to come home to and dinner in the oven. Bedtime stories and the soft glow of nightlites. Stepping on matchbox cars in the wee hours of the morning, and kissing sleepy baby heads goodnight. She had wanted it all so badly. Her whole life she had believed in a lie. Salvation resided not in books or prayers, but in pure, raw faith. The kind that lies in the hearts of simple men. The kind that allows humanity to transcend their own existence and enter into something much more magical. It was where she one day hoped to reunite with her son, and it was where she knew the whole world would finally come to the understanding that a simple man had made her see. The truest test of power on this earth was not in bombs, or millitary prowress. It wasn't in the most stable governments or economic giants. The truest test of power was in loving someone so completely and having the ability to weather the harshest storms with utmost grace. Beaten and violated, she had lifted herself up and kept going. In her darkest hours, she crawled up in search of light. She lies now with her partner and weeps for a child she can no longer call her own. Dreams of white fences and sack lunches slowly fade. Her 38 years on this earth have given her more heartache than anyone could ever dread to bear, and yet somehow in this tiny motel room, she finds the strength to take her life as is. On this night, as she lies in her partner's arms, the sobs slowly receed from her soul and Dana Scully becomes a believer.