From: emmy rains Date: 28 May 2003 15:43:51 -0700 Subject: [all-xf] New: Unacceptable 1/1 Source: atxc Title: Unacceptable Author: emmy Email: tadletales@hotmail.com Rating: R (Language ) Category: A, S. Spoilers: None Summary: Mulder's heart is stretched to the braking point when he thinks Scully is gone. Archive: Please feel free. Let me know where so I can gloat! Disclaimer: Boy wouldn't it be nice if I owned them but I don't, never did, only out for a stroll, will return them before the night is over. They belong to our beloved CC, 10-13 and Fox. Not making a penny so don't sue me. Author's Notes: Wow, I wondered how far these agents would go to save each other. I was amazed how much energy they share. I really enjoyed pushing them to the outer limits. So what you see may not be what really is. Special Thanks: I am extraordinarily grateful to mimic117 for the spit-shine beta job she did on my not so polished story. She held in her possession a magic spoon, waved it whenever I stumbled. At first I feared the almighty spoon. It was big and powerful but as time wore on I grew to appreciate it -- felt comforted by it. I knew it represented bravery, endurance and even at times compassion to my weak and feeble mind. This spoon gave me strength to keep late hours, pounding away on my keyboard, ignoring the calluses that grew thick on my finger tips. Through long hours of spoon meditation I grasped the meaning of the powerful and valuable words "only one!" With just one swat of her spoon I was able to stretch my imagination like never before. When I grew more confident I was allowed to shed my writer's reference and synonym finder, soaring high into the heavens but never taking my eyes off the almighty spoon. It was my navigator, my focal point. Occasionally I tried to go at it alone but was harshly reprimanded. The healing process was to be a lesson in learning, and the bruises healed more quickly than anticipated. All joking aside, mimic saved me. She wiped my tears and told me I could do this. She never left my side, held my hand, encouraged me along the way. She dedicated long hours to the completion of my story. How can I say thank you in an ordinary way to a not so ordinary and priceless person!! "Only one." I love you, girl! Thank you. Feed Back: Yes, of course. tadletales@hotmail.com *************************************************** Unacceptable by emmy Mulder lay back on Scully's bed. He was exhausted. Another serial killer. He'd killed five seven-year- old boys -- drugged them and tied plastic bags over their heads, suffocating them. But they caught the bastard. Scully sat at the round table in her hotel room typing her field report while it was fresh in her mind. Mulder lifted his head in her direction. "Hungry Scully?" "Uh yeah, what did you have in mind?" "Pizza?" "Okay you order it while I keep working." He picked up the phone to order and heard it ring three times. "Pizza King!" "Yeah I need to order a large pizza." "Ok sir what can I get you?" Mulder covered the phone and called out the toppings to Scully for her approval. "Mushrooms black olives, onions, and pepperoni?" "No pepperoni or onions but fresh tomatoes," she said. Mulder confirmed their order and hung up the phone. "Scully do I have time for a quick shower before the pizza comes?" "Is that your way of telling me I'm paying?" She smiled back at him. "No I just felt like showering off before we ate." "Go ahead. I'll get the pizza." When Mulder finally emerged from the steamy bathroom the pizza was waiting for him on the table. "Scully?" He walked into his adjoining room to see where she might have disappeared. "Scully?" Where the hell was she? He walked back into her room, and could see the pizza hadn't been touched. Maybe she went for ice? He opened the door, making a mental note to check where the car was parked. It hadn't been moved. The ice machine was around the corner so he headed in that direction. There was no light in the area so it was difficult to see much. Was there a light last night? As he approached the ice machine he realized it had been broken out. "Scully?" He called with a little more concern in his voice. He heard a moan. "Scully?" "Mul..." "Scullee!" She was on the ground, barely conscious. He asked her where she was hurt but she was too weak to speak. He wanted to carry her back to the room but moving her could make things worse. He reached down and squeezed her hand. "I'll be right back Scully." He ran back to the room to get his phone. He returned with his phone and a flashlight. He dialed 911and told the voice on the other end, "This is Agent Fox Mulder I have an agent down at the Pleasant Stay Motel on HWY 67 near the Dairy Queen." He tried to reassure Scully she was going to be fine. He shined his flashlight on her and could see there was blood. An adrenaline rush washed over him as he began to panic. He wanted to hold her and pull her close to him, but thought better of it. He wasn't sure where she was hurt. She was so cold! He took his jacket off and covered her. She needed a blanket but that meant running back to the room, and he couldn't bear to leave her side again. He could hear a siren. "They're almost here, Scully, hang on." He couldn't believe this was happening! ***** It seemed to take a lifetime to reach the hospital. She had been stabbed from behind, through her left lung. There was a lot of blood loss. Mulder waited for someone to update him on Scully's condition, he needed to know she was going to be fine. He paced the hall in front of the ER, pouncing on anyone who was wearing scrubs. "Mr. Mulder?" "Uh Yeah." "I'm Dr. Ackerman. Your wife is in grave condition. Are there any family members you want to call?" Mulder blinked at being referred to as Scully's husband, but didn't make the correction, it wasn't important right now. He brushed a hand across his forehead trying to rub the tension away. He attempted to speak, but couldn't. "Mr. Mulder are you alright?" Mulder felt the blood begin to leave his face. He felt dizzy and could hardly stand. The doctor steadied him. "Please sit down sir." "Her mother --- I should call her mother." "If you'd like we could have the floor nurse make that call for you Sir." The doctor looked down at the dark headed man with sympathetic eyes. "No I should call, she needs to hear this from me." Mulder was fighting the tears back and talking to Mrs. Scully wouldn't help. He had to be strong for her and for Scully. Mulder turned to see Scully being wheeled out of the ER. An orderly motioned for him to stop before he could reach her. "We are taking her to the ICU, you'll have to check with her doctor before we can allow you to see her." A tear escaped him as he stood watching her being wheeled away. Mulder headed up to the ICU. He needed to see her, to touch her, to let her know he was there and would be until she woke. He pushed the button on the elevator and when the doors opened he noticed there were no other occupants in the car. Mulder seemed to be moving in slow motion. His legs wobbled, his fingers couldn't find the strength to punch two for the second floor. Instead he found himself holding down the close button, forcing the doors to remain shut. He stood there numb looking down at the floor. He needed to get to Scully but couldn't convince himself to move. His heart doubled over in pain while his mind wrestled with Jacob's angel. He was consumed with guilt and somehow the cold metal walls housing the elevator seemed fitting for him. Shit, shit, *SHIT*. Mulder finally advanced the elevator to the second floor. Bleakly he stepped out in the direction of the nurse's station. "I'm looking for Dana Scully's room?" The nurse scanned her clip board and looked up at the tall gentleman. "Sir, she's not allowed any visitors right now." Mulder felt so defeated. "Please, I need to see her. The nurse looked at the worried man's face and could see the anxiety building. She wasn't sure what this man would do if he was denied a minute's visit with her. "Sir she's not allowed visitors yet, but I can understand you need a minute, so please don't disturb her. Only five minutes and you'll have to leave." The nurse pointed down the corridor "Third door on your right and only five minutes." Mulder gave her a thankful smile as he walked down to Scully's room. He took hold of the door handle and paused before entering. Taking a deep breath and slowly exhaling as if he were trying to exorcise his guilt. How many times had he done this, praying Scully would be okay? After her abduction, when her cancer threatened to take her and ... please be okay! Shit, he wasn't prepared for this. She looked like a switchboard with tubes and wires connected to her. He reached over and took her hand in his. It was cold. He tried to warm it, massage it... needed to feel life in her. She was unconscious but he had to reassure her everything was going to be alright. "Scully it's me, you're going to be okay." He was reminded of all the times he had sat by her bedside holding her hand, telling her she was going to be fine. Each time was as hard as the first. "Mr. Mulder, your five minutes are up and your wife needs her rest. Please sir. I'll see if the doctor will agree to let you back in within the hour." Mulder excruciatingly lifted his body away from Scully. He hated to see her hurting and was reluctant to leave her room. He wanted to be there when she woke up. He promised her he would. "Sir, could I get you anything?" The nurse walked over to Mulder and gave his arm a squeeze. The broken man's polite smile was heart-wrenching "Please let me know and I will be happy to get it for you. Maybe a cup of coffee?" "No thank you". I need to call Mrs. Scully, there may not be much time. Mulder shrank at the possibility. He also wanted to speak to the local PD before she got here. She didn't need to worry with the details of the police report. Mulder agonized over this phone call. He pushed #2 on his speed dial and waited for her to answer. God he hated this. "Hello" "Mrs. Scully?" "Fox? What's wrong, is it Dana? Is she alright?" "She was mugged as far as we can tell." "Fox is she okay?" Her voice was strained and frightened. "Fox answer me!" "I think you better get here. I'll have the Bureau book your flight and arrange for someone to drive you to the airport. We are at Memorial Hospital in Burleson, Texas, second floor. Just ask at the desk." The connection was broken. Mulder punched #5 on his speed dial. "Hello?" "Sir?" "Mulder?" "Yes Sir." "Can I help you, agent?" "Sir, it's Agent Scully, she was mugged outside our hotel room." "Is she alright? Is there anything I can do?" Mulder's voice broke and he was powerless to contain his emotions. "Sorry Sir, it's just.... it's not good. She was stabbed in the back, piercing her left lung, and she lost a tremendous amount of blood. Sir, I need you to escort Mrs. Scully down here. We are at Memorial Hospital in Burleson, Texas, second floor." "Consider it done Agent." The connection was broken. Mulder paced impatiently, clenching his hands on the back of his neck. He wanted, no *needed* to see her, to touch her. The doctor had been inside with Scully and it was taking so long. When was he going to come out with some news? The long wait had to be a good sign. It had meant she was still alive or why .... Damn this waiting! It had been a lifetime since the doctor went in. Mulder slumped down into the chair sitting nearest her room and waited. The door pulled open and the doctor stepped out into the hall. Mulder tried to read the diagnosis on the doctor's face before he could even speak. He felt anxious as the doctor moved toward him. "Mr. Mulder, your wife... it's touch-and-go for now. We have done all we can for her. Her left lung was severely injured, the surrounding tissue torn, we had to repair some muscle damage and the knife came dangerously close to her heart. We were able to fix the injury to her lung but she lost so much blood. We haven't been able to stabilize her blood pressure yet. We have her sedated and would like to keep her that way for the next 12 hours so she can rest." Mulder's red-rimmed eyes were a testimony to the condition he was in. The doctor's news wasn't what he wanted to hear but at least she was alive. "Can I see her?" "For fifteen minutes not a minute longer." Mulder gave the doctor a grateful smile as he turned toward Scully's room. Mulder felt faint as he entered the room. She looked pale, almost lifeless. He stood by her bedside and held her hand. It was so cold and limp. "Scully it's me, I'm here. I called your mom and she is on her way. Skinner is coming with her, they should be here soon. You have to hold on okay?" His voice was low and broken. He stood and stared at her as though trying to will some sign of consciousness back into her, but there was none. So many emotions were running through him. He couldn't stop thinking how this had to be his fault. He wanted to kill the son of a bitch who did this to her. Mrs. Scully trusted him to keep her daughter safe. It was his job damnit to watch her back. He dropped his head in defeat. Shit. Scully didn't deserve this. It was his fault. Fuck! He should have been there! Mulder heard the doorknob turn and noticed a nurse enter. She tapped her watch signaling his time was up. He could feel the absence of Scully even before he left the room. "Sorry, she needs her rest." Mulder understood he had to leave but he could barely tear himself away. He reached over and gently kissed her forehead then stood to leave. "I'll be right outside Scully, I promise." He felt weighted down with guilt and the pain on his face spoke for itself. The nurse followed Mulder out of the room. He fell into the chair he'd occupied before. He dropped his head in his hands and began to cry. If she died he would be alone in the world. Everyone he loved or touched was taken from him -- in one form or another. He sat there deflated, not wanting to breath, not wanting to face his worst nightmare. Shit, he was in so much pain. Mulder was glad the doctor kept his word and allowed him to visit every hour for 15 minutes. On his fifth visit, the doctor allowed him 25 minutes with her, before he was asked to leave. His time with Scully seemed to relax him some. She may not have been conscious but he hoped she could feel his energy in the room. It had been almost six hours since he called Skinner and Mrs. Scully. His anxiety level went up a notch, as he contemplated Mrs. Scully's arrival. Just as the thought occurred to him, Mulder heard his name called from down the hall. "Fox!" It was Mrs. Scully and Skinner. Mulder could feel the tension building as they got closer. He was consumed with guilt but tried to gather himself up to greet them. "Agent Mulder." "Sir, I'm glad..." "Fox, how is my baby girl? Can I see her? Have they given you any news?" "Mrs. Scully, I... she.... Uh ...uh she's out of surgery and it went fine but her blood pressure hasn't stabilized. She lost a lot of blood. She's very weak and the doctor says its touch- and -go for now." He swallowed hard. "The doctor wants to keep her heavily sedated for the next 12 hours." "Fox how did this happen?" Mulder gave Mrs. Scully a hug and tried to explain. "She was mugged outside our hotel room. I think she was going for ice and some one stabbed her from behind. I don't have any more news than that. Detective Mann of the Ft. Worth PD is investigating it right now." Tears filled the older women's eyes as she tried to take it all in. Mulder shouldered the blame and almost as a reflex he said, "It's my fault. I should have been there. I'm sorry." "Fox please, you couldn't have known." Mrs. Scully wasn't sure what to say or do for this broken man. She only knew her baby girl was fighting for her life -- again. Mulder nodded a mournful smile at Skinner and he returned the nod. Mrs. Scully began to cry and Skinner moved to her side to comfort her. He put his arm around her and it seemed to relax her some. They had just flown four hours together; she must have looked to him for reassurance. "When can I see her Fox? I want to speak with her doctor about my daughter." "Mrs. Scully, why don't I go and look for Dr. Ackerman? You stay here with Director Skinner. I'll be right back," Mulder turned toward the nurses' station. A nurse who apparently had overheard him indicated that she would notify the doctor that Mrs. Scully had arrived. Mulder smiled his appreciation to the nurse and turned back to the room. As Mrs. Scully entered her daughter's room, Mulder stayed a few steps behind her. He couldn't stand to remain outside the door but wanted to give her some space to visit in private. "Dana its mom. I got here as soon as I could. You've got to get better baby so I can take you home." Maggie struggled to keep her composure -- she was a strong woman but this was her baby lying here. She stepped closer holding a breath. Her mouth fell open and she struggled to hold in her tears. She leaned over taking hold of her daughter's hand, encompassing it. She was taken aback by the cold feel of her skin. Mulder had never seen her in so much pain. "I'm sorry it's all my fault, I should have been there for her-- protected her. I... it's all my fault, God I'm sorry!" Maggie began to collapse and Mulder reached for her. He sat her in the chair by the bed. "Mrs. Scully can I get you anything, water?" She couldn't speak. Mulder knew he couldn't take much more of this either. He walked to the door and looked out, hoping he could spot Skinner. He motioned for the Director to come in. Maggie was still crying when he entered the room. Mulder's spirit turned from helplessness to frustration seeing Mrs. Scully broken. When he fucked up he really fucked up. Shit. "Sir, I need you to help... she's..." Skinner looked at Mulder then over at Mrs. Scully and moved to her side when he noticed she was drooping with fatigue. "Maggie, let me find a place for you to lie down." He put his arm around her and helped guide her out of the room. She couldn't even talk, she was so despondent. He led her to an alcove and sat her down. He tried to talk to her but she just murmured something about losing her daughter. Eventually the two just sat there quietly. Maggie leaned her head against Skinner's shoulder and he even thought she might have dozed for awhile. "CODE BLUE, CODE BLUE!" Skinner looked over at Maggie, her eyes widened as the words blared over the PA system. She jumped up from her chair and she started running toward Scully's room. Skinner sprinted behind hoping it wasn't Scully. He knew these women couldn't take much more. A crash cart raced toward Scully's room just as Maggie rounded the corner. "No, no God please." Maggie's cries were gut-wrenching. Skinner reached for her and held her at the entrance of Scully's room. Mulder was forcibly being shoved back out of the way as he cried out for Scully. "Scully, don't leave me!" The fear in Mulder's eyes could almost vocalize the horror that enshrouded the room. He continued to call out for Scully, hoping beyond hope she would hear him and not leave. Skinner was trying not to fear the worst but Mulder's desperate cries were tearing at his heart. Maggie was loosing the battle of standing on her own-- her cries were unbridled and the anguish felt in the room was suffocating. "Scully! Aw -- fuck, please. Don't leave me. God this is my fault. I should have been there. I need you." Mulder tried to reach her hand, he needed to feel her. He promised he wouldn't leave her side and if she could feel him, maybe it would be enough for her to fight to hang on. "CLEAR!" The doctor was trying to resuscitate Scully's heart. Again and again, to no avail. *Nothing.* Her BP was low and she was weakening. Mulder's eyes were held wide open with fear. He was crying. Crying freely and fighting to get to her. The EKG readings were flat-lining and everyone in the room could see they were losing her. "CLEAR" They repeated the procedure, a hundred joules, and the doctor began increasing the voltage -- nothing. The flat beep on the monitor came crashing down on Mulder like the day Duane Berry took his partner from him. Mulder moved toward the bed and threw himself over her lifeless body. His heart twisted in pain, pain he feared ever facing. The tears stung as they washed down his face. His heart broken in half. "Shit this can't be happening - SHIIIT! NO!! FUCK- fuck." He began sobbing out of control. Mulder held her close, rocking her in his arms, his sobs ragged and feeling as if they would never end. Dr. Ackerman tried to pull the crazed man off the lifeless body but he heard Mulder growl at him to keep back. Maggie called out to her daughter, "Dana *no*, you can't leave me. Please don't take her from me, damnit!" She collapsed and Skinner caught her before she fell to the floor. This can't be happening dear *God* please help us. Skinner fought to hold his tears at bay. He carried Maggie out of the room and found an empty bed to lay her down. The air was thick with Mulder's grief. He couldn't accept Scully was gone. He was still holding her and had tightened his grip. He was moaning into her ear as though she could hear him. "Scully I love you, I should have told you how much. I have always loved you." His face was so wet with tears that it began to saturate her hair and fall over onto the pillow where her head rested. "Baby you can't leave me now, we haven't had time to -- you need to know how much I love you. I can't live without you Scully." Mulder's voice hitched as he pleaded hopelessly. His voice was strained as if there was no oxygen left in the room. Mulder placed small kisses on her face and thought maybe this was what it felt like to go insane. His body felt cold and trembled as he went into shock. The anguish tightened around him, strangling him to death. The room was empty except for Mulder holding Scully. The medical staff had left the room moments ago to allow him privacy to mourn. "Shit Scully, please don't let this be our last time together! Who will watch my back, hold me in my nightmares-- keep me honest? Don't go, God please, I need you. I love you, damnit! Please give me the chance to look into your beautiful soft blue eyes to tell you how much you mean to me. Don't leave me, I can't do this alone. You are my truth, my quest, God Scully you are my whole fucking life! I love you!" SHIT! He had cried so long his eyes felt swollen and raw. If he looked in a mirror, he was sure his face would have aged a thousand years since she had died. His heart strained to beat as the pain in his chest grew tighter. She was his life-line, his strength to continue his search for the truth and now she was gone. ***** Scully heard someone crying in the distance. It was dark and cold -- where was she? Disoriented and confused, she called out for Mulder. She placed her hands in front of her, reaching out in every direction, but there was nothing. No walls, no floor, nothing. She couldn't recognize any physical boundaries. It was as though she was in a dark cloud. How could this be? Where was Mulder? Perhaps it was a nightmare. She gathered her thoughts and tried to put her fears aside. She reached around behind her to secure her weapon but there was no weapon. She couldn't figure out where the hell she was and worrying would only cloud her mind. She reached in her pocket to retrieve her flashlight. No flashlight. The sobbing continued and it was frightening. "Mulder, Mulder, damnit." Where was he and why couldn't she find... The fear was returning. If only she could determine the direction of the cries she could figure out how to get out or wake up if it were a nightmare. "Scully. Oh Scully, you are the love of my life. How can you leave me like this? I won't accept that you're gone." Gone? Mulder I can feel your long beautiful fingers against my hair, but why are you crying? Shit. I need to get to him. He sounds as though I have -- died. His cries are unbearable, raking across my heart leaving it raw. If only I could let him know I'm fine. I can't be dead, I'm right here. I don't think his body can sustain much more misery. It would shatter his will to live. Mulder? Why the *hell* can't I find my way back to where ever the *hell* I was? Think, Dana where were you? We had finished the case and... the hotel, Mulder's pizza-- the ice machine! What happened? I felt someone hit me, no they stabbed me! Mulder, please help me, what's happening? She heard the cries getting closer and began to move in that direction. If only I had a flashlight. "Mulder, I'm fine, please hear me." Damnit Dana, wake up, move, and tell him you're fine. She was becoming desperate to reach him. She could hear Mulder's cries and feel his touch, why couldn't he see she was fine? "I love you please don't leave me this way." It appeared Mulder was deaf to the possibility she was gone. He was talking in a steady stream, as if it would keep her from leaving him. "Scully I...." He knew he was losing the battle of holding on to her. "Mulder, I hear you, I'm coming. Mulder, I'm here. Why can't you hear me, why can't I see you? He needs me, he's hurting. God, please help me, I don't know what's happening!" Mulder felt a slight twitch in her fingers but he thought he was hallucinating. The EKG had flat-lined and even if he refused to believe it, medically she was gone. Again he imagined her stirring slightly, hardly a breath of a movement but he thought her eyelids moved. Mulder imagined he had heard a beep from the monitor and looked up to check. A weak rhythm registered on the monitor. He felt for a pulse, it was slight but there was a pulse. He pressed the call button on the side of her bed. This shouldn't be but she had a weak pulse. He pulled away slightly and watched her. Mulder blinked hard and considered pinching himself. He wiped his face and searched for a pulse again. The nurse stepped in, not expecting to find anyone but a distraught man. "Get the doctor, I think she's alive!" Mulder raised an eyebrow at the nurse and motioned for her to hurry. "Sir, it's been much too long. She can't possibly be alive." Flabbergasted at finding a faint beat she turned and ran out the door for the doctor. The doctor must have hastened to Scully's room because he seemed to appear out of nowhere "Its impossible nurse. She expired too long ago." A faint heartbeat was registering on the monitor. It could have been a malfunction in the equipment, though Dr. Ackerman placed two fingers on Scully's neck to reassure all she was most certainly not alive. To his amazement he felt a slight pulse and he jerked back. She was alive. He couldn't understand it but she *was* alive. He quickly placed an oxygen mask over her mouth and nose and watched as her heart rate grew stronger. "She's alive." Mulder smiled as he heard the doctor whisper words he'd longed to hear but never expected. ****** Three days later, Scully was improving more each day. Her heartbeat was steady. Mulder hadn't left her side except to use the bathroom. He sat in the chair beside her bed holding her hand, waiting for her to wake up. "Um." Scully moistened her lips and moaned slightly. She blinked her eyes to try and focus. "Mulder?" "I'm here Scully." Mulder was smiling with his whole face, if that were possible. Scully lightly squeezed his hand but to Mulder it was a life line. Not that he deserved a life line, after what he put her and Mrs. Scully through. For the first time since this happened he breathed a little easier. "Mulder, where am I? What happened? I couldn't find you and it was so dark and cold." "Scully, take it easy. Just rest, you were... it's okay now. His face looked relieved at the sound of her voice. Mulder buzzed for the nurse. Minutes later, the nurse entered the room and smiled at the couple. "Well how do you feel?" "Thirsty." Mulder was pouring a glass of water before the nurse managed to respond. Mulder stood back out of the way while the nurse examined Scully. He wasn't ready to leave her side yet. After the nurse left, Mulder heard a light tap on the door. Mrs. Scully entered wearing a smile but her body looked ragged from the days' trauma. "Hi honey how are you feeling?" She moved closer to her daughter. She couldn't stop staring at her for fear she would disappear if she blinked. It was only three days ago she had been taken from her. Maggie looked up to see Skinner standing in the doorway and motioned for him to come in. He had apparently been giving her some privacy. "Honey, Walter's here." "Agent you gave us a hell of a scare, I'm pleased to see you feeling stronger." "Thank you Sir." Skinner turned to Mulder. "Agent." "Yes Sir" "Can I see you in the hall for just a minute?" Mulder stood and headed for the door. He and Skinner moved out of the room and into the hall. "Mulder, Detective Ross was looking for you. They caught the bastard. A 16 year old kid. His friends dared him to do it, just for kicks." Mulder was silent and closed his eyes at that, reliving the pain they'd all suffered the last few days. Mrs. Scully appeared in the hall. "Fox, she is asking for you. Why don't Walter and I go get us all something to eat while you stay with Dana?" Mulder nodded and returned to her bedside. "Well sunshine, maybe they'll spring you from here soon so we can go home. I have a lot to tell you!" He reached down and kissed her cheek. Scully closed her eyes at that. His touch seemed to alleviate some of her discomfort. And even though she wasn't ready to admit it, he knew she loved him. When she was feeling stronger he would tell her what he had guarded for seven long years--how much he loved her. He wouldn't hide his feelings from her anymore, she was too important. One day soon he would get the courage up to ask her to marry him, too! They sat quietly with their fingers intertwined until Scully drifted back off to sleep. They had a lot to talk about when she was feeling better. He wanted her to be part of his life not just as his partner but his wife. The thought of spending the rest of his life with her took his breath away and he realized she was his truth he had been searching for. Feed back is appreciated thank you. tadletales@hotmail.com