Title: The Way I Saw It
Author: Jaime Lyn
Email: Leiaj@bellsouth.net
Rated: R, for bad language.  My belief is that people have "potty mouth minds" 
when they're angry.  
Keywords: Mulder/Scully Romance (actually UST first)
Spoilers: If you haven't watched "The End" then you will have no clue who 
Diana Fowley is.
Disclaimer: I don't own them.  Please don't sue.  Thank you.
Summary: Scully has had an awful day, Mulder is drunk, and Diana Fowley thinks 
its all Scully's fault. Who is right? Who is wrong?  And what the heck happened? 

::Author's note::  Ok, this story is told as if the characters are the ones 
telling it, to you, to the audience, or to whoever, and the present time it takes 
place is around 2 am in Kansas.  The "flashback" parts are told from the point 
of view of whichever character has current control of the storytelling, and are 
meant to be looked at as if they are happening in the present time. (Even though 
we can see that they have already happened in the past, but then, I guess that's 
the point of a flashback right?) Ok, that 
wasn't so hard right? <smile>

<<<<<ALL FEEDBACK LOVED, CHERISHED, AND REPLIED TO---HINT HINT (grin.) >>>>>>

Ok, so on with the show.  

For Jen: My best bud. I was going to call this "How Scully Got Her Groove Back," 
but I decided against it.  LOL. 

The Way I Saw It (part 1: Assumptions and Ruminations)
By Jaime Lyn
 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Corcoran Motel, 
Witchita Kansas,
2:14 am, Early August 14th.

SCULLY STARTS HER STORY:
   ~^~^~^~^^~^~~^~

Ok. Little known fact: Visiting Kansas in August is like visiting Hell itself, 
only Kansas is less pleasant and hotter than Hell, and at least in Hell you're 
already dead, so life can't get much worse. 

Sigh.   

Unfortunately, I've learned throughout my years that life can and usually DOES 
get worse before it gets any better, but I mean, come on now. I honestly think 
that I've had my fill of "worse" for the day, so where the hell's the "better"?  
I certainly haven't seen it.  And as for Mulder... well, let me just say that 
he is going to get a taste of just how bad life can and DOES get as soon as I 
get my hands on him.  The second I see him, as a matter of fact.  

I'm going to kill him, I swear to god, the second he walks into this room.  

Why?  

Because Mulder's ditched me... again... AGAIN, goddamn it, and "again" must 
be the gigantic understatement of the year.  I mean, how many times does this 
make it?  Oh, I dunno, A BILLION?

And not only that, but he left me with all the paperwork.  ALL of it.  

And you know, I hate doing case write- ups.  I do. 

No, I mean I really, REALLY hate them.

Really fucking hate them with a really big fucking passion---please excuse the 
expletive.  Sorry. He just MAKES me want to curse.  I usually... I never... I mean 
I don't curse but...

Well this is HIS goddamn fucking paperwork!

He should be the one doing these stupid write ups instead of me... instead of me 
covering for him again. Doing his paperwork AGAIN.  

God, I hate these fucking things.  

I especially hate doing them after spending 12 fucking hours in a makeshift fucking 
autopsy bay out in the "middle of fucking nowhere," Kansas...or wherever it is that 
we are right now.  And I really hate forgoing both breakfast and lunch to spend 6 
fucking hours on a fucking airplane---a crowded and small fucking airplane---sitting 
next to Mr. "Dan-I-can't-stay-out-of-your-personal-space-how-are-you-beautiful?" 
Webster, computer salesman and LOSER extrordinaire ... And even THAT was after nearly 
12 fucking hours the night before, of covering for HIS fucking paperwork... AGAIN!!

But no, I'm not bitter...Really I'm not.  Really. Truly. 

I'm not...

I'm just enraged.  Completely enraged.  

See, there's a BIG fucking difference.
 
Oh, and did I mention when it was that I slept last? Well, I'd like to think 
it was sometime during the middle of last March, but I can't be positive about that.  
I really don't know.  I don't know because I don't sleep. I don't sleep because I'm 
never home.  I'm never home because of Mulder.  Sensing a pattern here? 

The fucking bastard.  I have criteria for that.  

But where was I again?

Oh yeah.  My story. So anyway, Mulder calls and wakes me up at 6 o clock this morning.  6 O CLOCK For god sakes!

"Scully, get up," he says.  "16 decapitated humans in Kansas with no discernable 
suspect," he says.  "All have been drained of blood and we have an 8 o clock flight" 
he says.

"Go away Mulder, it's Saturday" I say.

I wanted to kill him.  

As a matter of fact, I still do.   

Oh, and did I mention that I'd already been up all night trying to make a dent 
in the expense reports that he so "casually left on my desk" the evening before?---
that bastard.  Well I had.  And I was pissed---to say the least.  And tired.  And 
annoyed.  And so very NOT in the mood for him at the moment it wasn't even funny.  
But did he care??  No, why the hell would he? 

So anyhow, he repeats "8 o clock Scully" and of course, he doesn't understand how 
in the world I wouldn't want to go with him.  Decapitated bodies at 8 o clock in 
the morning?  Autopsies galore?  Being up to my neck in blood and guts on a Saturday?? 
Oh yeah, that's certainly MY idea of fun.  Of course, I'll go.  It'd be an absolute 
honor Mulder.  A real fucking field day.  Wait---Lemme go get my party hat.  

You know,it's amazing. The man can be a relative genius when it comes to profiling 
and behavioral models, but when it comes to tact, he's about as thick as lead.  
And when it comes to ME, he's about as observant and considerate as an empty fish 
bowl sometimes. 

So OF COURSE he doesn't hear that I'm tired, and repeats "Scully" into my ear 
twice more while I groan, wishing that there were some way to successfully point 
and shoot a gun into the receiver.  There wasn't, unfortunately, and with THAT 
option obviously being out, I distinctly remember telling him to "Go away."

To which he succinctly replied "Wake up." 

To which I deftly replied "No," and then to which, of course, was answered with a 
"Get dressed." 

So being as chipper as I was at 6 am, I took a moment to angrily flip off the phone 
and realize that I should've just hung up when I had the chance.  I should've just 
let him suffer.  But I didn't, and if only I knew then what I know now, I would have 
hung up.  I really would have.  

But he prodded me with "Oh come on Scully," and of course, I let him win. Why? 
Because I always let him win.  Why?  Because I am just inherently STUPID. I just AM.  
That's why. 

And when I failed to respond this first "Scully" he repeated "Scully" again and I 
swear to you, I was ready to kill. 

Maim, stab, shoot, ANYTHING. 

Oh Jesus Christ Mulder just let me sleep for THE LOVE OF GOD, I wanted to scream 
at him, I really did.  

But I didn't say a word and he took this as acceptance. 

"I'll be there in an hour," he says.  "We'll eat along the way," he says.  
"I swear, you can sleep on the plane," he says.  

Yeah, right; whatever Mulder.  You want to know what I ate today?? Huh??  Coffee.  
And a peanut--I think.  And you wanna know what else? I would've just loved to 
have slept on the plane, I really would have... if only I hadn't been packed into 
it like a sardine... And relegated to conversation with "Dan-Mr Wonderful-prozac-
poster boy."  Oh yeah, that was fun too.  A regular barrel of laughs let me tell you.  

But now I digress.

So Mulder told me to get going and I of course responded the best way I could.   

"You know something Mulder? Fuck---"

But unfortunately, he hung up on me.  Right in the middle of my sentence, and 
right before I got to finish my expletive too--Damn it.  He knows I never curse 
and I had really wanted him to hear it.  But I'm sure he was, no doubt, so giddy 
and worked up over a bunch of mutilated, insanguinated tourists, that he decided 
to jump up and dance around his apartment before he came to pick me up and interrupt 
my Saturday. 

Of course, if I had known then that he was really on his car phone, that he was 
already on his way to picking HER up, I DEFINETLY would not have come.  I wouldn't 
have even gotten dressed. I wouldn't have bothered.   I would've hung up on his sorry 
ass and gone right back to bed. I would've slept all day. I could've slept all day.  
Damn him.  And damn that Diana Fowley too. 

He thinks she's really on our side but I know better.  I see her. 
I see what she wants and I can see through her games. I know that she can't be 
trusted. I see it and I SENSE it, but he doesn't and that bothers the living hell 
out of me. He sees her through rose colored glasses with blinders on. 

Oh yeah.  Because Diana would never do that Scully, no NEVER.  Not Diana.     

God, I hate her.  That nuisance.  That LEACH. I mean, just who exactly does 
she think she is?  And where the hell does she come off anyway, just plastering 
herself to MY Mulder's side(and he is MY Mulder, by the way), acting like she's 
just the newly appointed goddess of everything X File?  

Well, you know what?  She's not. She's just not and she never will be.  
I don't care who she is or where she came from.  =I= am the only X Files 
Goddess(or whatever ridiculous name you wanna give it)around here.   =I= 
earned that damn title god damn it. I spent 6 YEARS earning it, 6 YEARS, 
and I do NOT plan on beseeching it any time soon. I've been knee deep in monsters, 
alien abductions, conspiracies, and blood and guts for far too long to have her 
come along and take away what's rightfully mine.  

I've been through TOO much with the X Files and more importantly, too much with 
MULDER just to have her come along and try to undermine me with her "little miss 
sweet and innocent oh I believe you Mulder" cutsey FBI agent act and take it all away.  I won't let her.  

There is very little that I find is stable for me in this life, and being 
the lone woman in Mulder's is my one true thing.  And if she thinks she's 
going to upsurp me.... 

Well, now I'm just getting away from the point here.  Where was I again?  
Let me think... phone call... Kansas... dead tourists... OH YEAH! Ok, I remember 
now.  So after he picked me up...

           ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~
                   SCULLY:
                  FLASHBACK
             MUCH earlier that day...
          7: 45 am, outside Scully's Apt.  


"Hey Scully, Rise and shine!"

The first thing I notice is that Mulder is just way too chipper for 7 o clock 
in the morning.  It's just sick.  For some reason, he's like a fucking pop tart, 
and it's probably because of this ridiculous case.  Uck. God, he reminds me of a 
hummingbird on speed, but in actuality, I think that the hummingbird would be less 
irritating. 

With a slightly raised eyebrow, I flip down my sunglasses and drop my suitcase 
into the trunk, shoving his own into the back carelessly.  Good.  I hope I broke 
something.  

I slam the trunk lid down hard, angrily, and he widens his eyes slightly.  
He looks so godammned stunned it's ridiculous.  

"Yikes Scully," he comments lightly.  "Someone not have their v-8 yet?" 

I turn to look at him witheringly.  

Oh shut up Mulder.  Just shut up before I deck you.  

He eyes me speculatively and I eye him back.  We are so busy playing "optical 
showdown" that I fail to notice the extra duffel bag and I fail to see the extra 
passenger.   

FLASHBACK INTERRUPTION
SCULLY NARRATES:

<<<If I had seen her, believe me, I would have yanked my bags right out of the 
trunk right then and there, no matter how immature it may have looked.  

Because had I bothered to look a little further, I'm sure I would have seen HER 
there right away.  Her irritatingly poised expression.  Her all perfectly makeup-ed 
face and her perfectly groomed hair, sitting in the front seat----MY usual spot in 
the rental car mind you.  

But I was, of course, too busy being mad at Mulder.  So you see, I didn't notice her 
at all until I opened the door to get in the front.  And by then, it was already 
obvious that she was there, not going anywhere, and APPARENTLY, not going to move 
either...>>>>

FLASHBACK TO THE MORNING.
STILL SCULLY:

So SHE is here.  Great.  I should've known.    

Wonderful.  Terrfic.  Life just doesn't get any better, thank you very much for 
letting me know in advance Mulder.  

"Diana wanted to assist in this particular assignment," Mulder explains poorly, 
and I don't even bother ASKING him how she found out about the case in the first 
place.  I'm sure it's something I just don't want to know. Something that will no 
doubt make me hate her more, and right now, I don't need the added stress.  

"Fine.  Whatever Mulder," I mutter, cursing whatever god has decided to hate 
me today, and grudgingly, I get into the back seat.  

I HATE the backseat. It sounds so petty, but I do.  I hate sitting in the back, 
and I HATE the idea of her sitting in the front.  With him.  So close to him.  
Where =I= always sit.  It just makes me want to throw up.  

"Scully?" he questions, "Are you ok?" 

Now I think I really WILL throw up.

Oh yeah, I'm just peachy Mulder.  

I stare at him pointedly, and then closely observe as he shares a 
little furtive "glance" with Diana.  I quickly decide that I don't like 
that little "look" AT ALL, and I grit my teeth to control my anger.  No, I 
don't like that. Not one bit.  Mulder and I are the only ones who are allowed 
to do the "slient look" thing, and she is most certainly NOT.  So that alone, 
pisses me off.  But then she shrugs and he looks back at me as if to say, "What, 
are you mad about the seating arrangement deal?  That's kind of petty Scully" 
and I just want to choke the life out of them both.  

"I'm fine," I manage lowly, and he accepts it, closing the door and moving 
around to the driver's side to get in.  Diana turns her head around again and 
smiles at Mulder.  He closes his door and smiles back.  All in all, it's a very 
disturbing scene at 7 am on a Saturday.  Actually, it's a very disturbing scene 
for ANY time on ANY day really.  

"So Fox, you think I can handle a little Elvis today?" she asks him and then 
proceeds to laugh, as if what she's just said is the funniest thing in the world.  

Oh please.

Mulder starts up the car and then steals a glance at her, nodding as if it's 
some stupid inside joke---which it probably IS---and then he begins to laugh as well.  
Oh ha ha, yeah I'm sure it's hilarious, whatever it means.   God, I think I've just 
lost my appetite for the week.  The year.  The decade.  I hate her.  

                      ~^~^~^~^~~^~^~^~^~^~^~~^ 

Keep going...there's more...


Title: The Way I Saw It
Author: Jaime Lyn
Email: Leiaj@bellsouth.net
Disclaimer and all that fun stuff in the first part.  Read on!!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~
2:14 am, Early August 14th,
Ford Taurus Rental,
Somewhere 5 minutes from the motel
DIANA TELLS HER STORY:

God, I hate her.  

I just really, REALLY do.

This is all Agent Scully's fault, ALL of it, this whole day, and you 
know what? I hate her. Well ok, no, that's not completely true. Some of 
this is Mulder's fault, and maybe a TEENSY bit of it is mine, but 
mostly, it's hers.  Her fault. All her fault.  

Because you know, if it wasn't for that damn woman, then none of this 
would be happening.  NONE of it.  I'm almost positive of it.  If it 
wasn't for Dana Scully, then Mulder and I would be here, alone 
together---WITHOUT her or her god damned "expertise", happily 
investigating a case that we most DEFINETLY do NOT need her help on... 
But instead, here I am, driving a rented Taurus, while watching him 
look so sick I'm afraid for the upholstery's safety.  

Damn Dana Scully.  

So what happened, you ask?  Well... EVERYTHING!!  I just... I mean... 
EVERYTHING happened!  Starting with the beginning of today, up until 
now, as I sit in this stupid rental, driving an intoxicated Mulder back 
to the hotel while he just sits here and whines something incoherent 
about disappointing his wonderful, precious "Scully."

Did I mention that I hate her yet?

Well I do.  

God, I mean where the HELL was she anyhow? And why didn't she turn her 
fucking cell phone on??  You know, I never thought I'd say this, but 
I'm starting to really wish that she HAD remembered to turn it on.  If 
she'd had the brains to do so, then I wouldn't have been the one to be 
woken from a sound sleep just to go pick up his sorry drunken ass.  

And for that matter, what in the hell was Mulder THINKING when he 
downed 4 shots of bourbon anyhow?  That it would somehow ENDEAR him to 
her?  That Ms. Ice Queen herself would just come and get him and then 
take pity on his stupid ass?  Well you know what, =I'M= not stupid and 
I know that for whatever reason, he went and drank because of her, but 
honestly, I don't know WHAT made him think that she would want to take 
pity on him because of it. And that only makes me angrier because I'M 
the one stuck picking him up.  DAMN IT!!  

I'm going to kill Dana Scully.  

But now I've strayed from the story here.  

So anyhow, Mulder and I were talking on the phone this morning about a 
case involving dead tourists when OF COURSE, he realized that he just 
couldn't do ANYTHING without his wonderful little red headed partner, 
and so he just HAD to call her and tell her.  

Nevermind that it wasn't his place to do so, but then, being 
essentially "Mulder", he went ahead and did it anyhow. Then, about 15 
minutes later, he called me from his car and told me that he had 
already made plane reservations for three people to Kansas. Of course, 
I didn't even have to ASK him why, or who the third person was going to 
be, because I already knew.  

So, trying just to be civil, I told him "ok. Sounds fine Mulder," and 
gritted my teeth the whole time, wishing that she would somehow be 
deathly ill and unable to come.  But then he was at my doorstep, not 
even 5 minutes after that, throwing my stuff into the car, and my 
futile notion was beginning to fade fast.  

"Come on," he said.  "We have to get to Scully's. I told her I'd only 
be an hour."

At the mention of her name, I really felt like pounding my fists and 
screaming but I was good and so I didn't.  Instead, I asked "So how 
long ago was that," like I really cared what time he had called her, 
and so he looked at his watch.  

"Damn---nearly 50 minutes ago" he replied and ordered me in.  

So then we got to Scully's place and she got in the car as icily as 
always, snapping at Mulder and acting like a complete Spoiled princess, 
I'm assuming, just because we woke her poor self up on a saturday. Like 
god forbid she should ever wake up early on a weekend right?

Well anyways, she didn't say a word the whole car ride, not a single 
word to either of us, and just stared out the window like a petulant 
child, irritated and ignoring whatever it was we were talking about.  

See what I mean about her being irritating?  I'm telling you, if you 
had met her, you'd hate her too.  

At any rate, about 20 minutes later, we pulled into the airport where 
of COURSE, Mulder felt so guilty about disturbing her precious "beauty 
sleep" that he just COULDN'T do enough for her... 

              ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~~^


   DIANA
 FLASHBACK: 
A little later but STILL earlier that day...
Close to 8 am. 
DC International Airport


God, they are just so sickeningly attached to each other that I think I 
may just throw up right here.  Really, I just may.  If I have to take 
another of his "knowing glances" or "concerned gazes" pointed in HER 
direction, I really, really may.   

I mean, it's bad enough that every time I tried to engage him in 
conversation while on the way here, he had to look up at the rearview 
mirror every 5 fucking minutes just to see what she was doing.  Or to 
see if she was listening.  Or to see if she was looking back at him.  
Or maybe even just to see whether or not she would decide to take her 
stupid sunglasses off.  Which she didn't---by the way.  

But now everything is all "Scully I'll get that.   Scully, let me take 
that for you.  Scully, let me get you coffee.  Scully, let me follow 
you around on a leash..." and it's making me want to bang my head up 
against a brick wall.  

Well ok, no he didn't TECHNICALLY say that last one, but he might as 
well have. It was written all over his face.  

And you know, I wonder if she even notices the way he constantly looks 
at her when he doesn't think she sees him. Like the way he's blatantly 
staring at her from behind the coffee shop counter right now.  Just 
patently gazing at her like some ridiculous lovesick puppy in heat.  
Does that ever bother her at all?  Does she know about it, or does she 
just not care? Sometimes I think it's the latter but then other times 
it's hard to tell. Because even though she's about as emotionally 
charged as a piece of bark, I can see that she is fiercely protective 
of him.  Insanely, ridiculously so, and if I didn't know better, 
sometimes, I'd even say she was jealous----of any woman who even talks 
to him. 

But you know what really irritates me?  What really irks me?  The fact 
that even though this was MY case, MY assignment, and I JUST SO 
HAPPENED to let him in on it, he just HAD to call up his precious 
Scully anyhow.  "Yeah" he said,  "That sounds interesting Diana." He 
said.   "Haven't had an interesting case in 
awhile." He said.  And then of course, the inevitable "I'll call Scully 
and tell her.  She's really good with stuff like this."

Yeah right, I'm sure she is Mulder.  I'm sure she's WONDERFUL with 
stuff like this. I'm sure she's just INCREDIBLE with stuff like this. 
Yeah, sure.  Go right on ahead and tell her Mulder, I can't wait, 
really.  And I'm sure she can't either.  I'm sure she just LOVES being 
waken up at 6 o clock in the morning on a 
Saturday for stuff like this. I'm sure she relishes it. I'm sure she 
WAITS for it.  I mean come on!! Scully is, after all, the end all to 
EVERYTHING, isn't she Mulder?  Scully is perfect.  Scully is God.  

Whatever.  Please. Just kill me now.  

And THEN, to top of it all off, he goes and tells her that the case is 
HIS, and that I'm only "assissting" him---just so that she doesn't get 
mad at him-or at least mad-DER, in her case, or whatever.  Well you 
know what? I'm going to make her SEE just whose case this is.  Like I 
would really need HER help anyhow.  

Well, at least I can take comfort in the fact that I got that one 
little dig at her in the car. ---Our little Elvis joke from about a 
zillion years ago. The one that I KNEW she wouldn't get, it's sole 
purpose just to annoy her.  It had been one of those little "inside 
jokes" that she hadn't been around for.  One that he laughed at while 
she gritted her teeth in anger and irritation and didn't think I saw 
her.  Well I did, and I really hope that it made her good and mad.  

But now I'm losing my train of thought here.  Calm down Diana.  

So anyway, there's about 10 more minutes before we have to board, and I 
spy her, over by the gift shop's magazine rack. And being the glutton 
for punishment that I am, I casually decide to walk over to where she's 
standing and retrieve a pack of strawberry bubble yum.  It's dumb, and 
I know I could probably just as easily get one over at the other shop, 
but I really want to get a good look at her.  I want to find out what 
the hell is so damn wonderful that Mulder thinks the sun rises and sets 
around her.  I want to try and figure out what the hell is so special 
about her.  

She notices me notice her and looks up briefly, almost disdainfully, 
and then raises an eyebrow, as if to say "what do YOU want" before she 
bows her head again and returns to whatever it is she's perusing 
through to pass time.  It's almost as if her distaste for me is 
radiating off her in waves.  

INTERRUPT FLASHBACK:
DIANA NARRATES

<<<<So ok, I'm not dumb. She doesn't like me and I know it. I can feel 
it.  I'm not blind you know, and I know that she wasn't exactly jumping 
for joy when I took "her seat" in the front of the car today.  And you 
know what else, that suits me perfectly fine because I don't like her 
either. Not at all. 

She's very distant---almost cold---to say the least, rigidly, 
ridiculously scientific, exceedingly closed minded, and frankly, I 
don't know how in the world Mulder puts up with her.  She's absolutely 
NOTHING like what I thought a long standing, valued partner of his 
would be, and frankly, I don't get it at all. She's got the personality 
of a dry piece of lettuce, and the appeal of dental surgery to match.  

I mean, there's eccentric taste and then there's ECCENTRIC taste.  

And that's besides the fact that =I= was here first. I was THE first.  
I mean, I knew what the X files were while she was probably still off 
at Quantico or somewhere.  I was there with Mulder, discovering those 
damn files and investigating them before she ever was and I intend to 
be there again.  Where I should have been the whole time.  It was 
stupid of me to just leave and I realize that now.  

Because now that I've had a taste... Well, let's just say my interest 
has been pequed again.  I want the X Files back. I want MULDER back...

So my first thought was that I had to assess this "Scully" situation 
immediately.  I needed to evaluate it and get rid of it.  Quickly.  
Somehow, I had to figure out how to edge her out of the picture.  To 
drive her away.  I needed to. I still do. Because not only is she a 
MAJOR distraction, she's also an obstacle. And if she thinks she's the 
only one here who wants the X Files, who wants MULDER, then she's sadly 
mistaken.   So ok, she may be Mulder's universe but =I= was here first, 
and Mulder was MY partner before he was hers.  I don't care what she 
thinks.

Of course, this is easier said than done...>>>>

CONTINUE FLASHBACK
STILL DIANA:

I glance up at her and watch as she shifts her weight from one foot to 
the other, obviously pretending not to recognize my presence.  So 
involved in this task is she, that she jumps ever so slightly when she 
hears someone come up behind her.  

"Hey Scully, coffee?"

It's Mulder's voice and Mulder's feet approaching from behind and she 
realizes this quickly, her body apparently relaxing with the knowledge. 
I watch as he touches her shoulder, offering his hand out to her in 
what looks like a delicately ridiculous peace offering.  It is the 
aforementioned scalding cup of coffee, and he somehow manages to make 
it look like he's handing her jewelry. She looks up from her paper and 
sighs, taking the cup from him like she's doing him a favor. 

Oh please. I just feel so bad for poor Scully, woken up at dawn this 
morning. My heart BREAKS for you, really it does.   

"It's decaf Scully," he declares proudly.  "And uh, there's no cream 
because I know you don't um, like it and----"

"Yes I can see that Mulder, thank you."  

He shuffles his feet and doesn't look at me at all. No surprise there. 
I wonder if he sees that I'm even around.  Probably not, knowing him.  
After all, the light that is Dana Scully shine-th so bright that I may 
need sunglasses. 
----Maybe she'll even let me borrow hers. 

Oh whatever. 

"Look Scully," he says.  "I didn't mean to ahh... I mean I didn't want 
for...."

"Me to be mad at you for waking me up." She finishes smoothly, blowing 
gently onto the surface of her coffee nonchalantly, as if she just 
ALWAYS finishes his sentences like a psychic friend.  

God, I think I may forgo the air sick bag and just be sick right here.  
How wonderfully cute.  How incredibly adorable. God, I hate her.    

"Well I was" she answers pointedly, looking up from her drink, "but 
then I suppose I would've been even angrier if you'd have gone off half 
assed without me."

For some reason that seems to make him smile although I don't see how 
it can possibly be construed as a compliment.  Like I said, I just 
don't understand it.  

"So then I saved you the trouble of coming to save me?" he quips 
jokingly at her, and she just returns it with a withering, "Been there, 
done that" look.  By god, I don't think the woman even KNOWS how to 
smile. 

"I wouldn't go that far Mulder," she answers him wryly, and that just 
makes his smile even wider. Damn it. This is really starting to piss me 
off. I just KNOW I must be missing something here.  

He gives her another goofy half grin and tips her chin gently up to 
look at him.  The fact that he's touching her at all makes me want to 
dry heave, but the idea that he'd doing it as if he thinks she's going 
to break in half makes me want to regurgitate my entire breakfast.  

I really, REALLY hate her.  

"Hey there," he says gently.  "Are we ok?" 

I'm only assuming that she takes that as his way of asking forgiveness, 
because she, to the surprise of myself, god, and the rest of the world, 
actually smiles back at him.  

"Yeah, we're ok." She replies, and then returns his gaze, as if they're 
talking in some secret code or something.  It's so strangely cute it's 
repulsive.  

Then they look up, finally noticing they have company, I'm assuming, 
from the way that Mulder abruptly removes his fingers from Scully's 
chin as if he's embarrassed, and the way that Scully simply stares at 
me, like "Hel-LO?  And you're here because??" It's almost like they've 
just all of a sudden realized that I was still alive, still HERE, which 
is probably the case, and as such, wanted to know why in the hell I was 
eavesdropping on them.  Yeah, like I'd really care what they had to say 
to each other in an airport gift shop.  

Irritated, I force them a smile and offer my gum to the cashier, trying 
to keep my temper in check.  Mulder mumbles something about going to 
check on the boarding and then silently disappears, leaving myself and 
the wonderful agent Scully alone together.  

Oh great. Thank you God.  

The gum now paid for, Scully and I regard each other quietly, 
uncomfortably. 

"So, how's the coffee?" I ask lightly. 

A pause.   

"Fine." 

We look away from each other.  Thankfully though, our not-quite-
conversation is interrupted when I hear the boarding announcement for 
our plane, a voice signaling the continuation of my descent into hell.  
                                                         
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~
 2:16 am,
Corcoran Motel.
SCULLY CONTINUES HER STORY:

<<<<I must admit, for a short while there, Mulder had really managed to 
out-do himself in the apology department. Or at least---as far as 
"Mulder apologies" goes, he did.  I mean, he hardly EVER acts 
chivalrous, especially when it comes to me---I guess because don't 
usually let him, and so when he said "Scully it's ok, I'll get your 
bag," I knew that it had to be his strange way of apologizing for 
waking me up. Or at least I had hoped it was.  The idea managed to poke 
through my anger and make me think of what a loveable jackass he could 
be... SOMETIMES.

Taking my bags, carrying my duffel, and then even buying me coffee, I 
soon found myself actually smiling when he presented a decaf to me---
even though I was still pretty angry. Well, really angry, actually.  I 
guess that it's just... Well, it's hard to explain. It's like, even 
when sometimes I'm so angry that I just want to kill him, strangle him, 
shoot him, I still can't help but wanting to shut him up, grab him by 
the tie, and then drag his mouth down to mine just to feel him all 
around me.  To sample what he tastes like.  Now I've never actually 
DONE that---mind you, but I still can't help thinking it... ALL the 
time...  EVERY single time.  And after awhile, I just suppose it helps 
to ebb my anger somehow.  I don't know why.  Call it a form of morbid 
curiosity I guess or call it... well call it whatever you want, but all 
I know is that it IS a totally insane thing to feel. And I realize 
that---I do. It's a completely contradictory statement, to want him 
when I'm so mad I could scream, but I just can't help it.  It's just 
the way I feel. Wanting to know what his lips feel like, what his skin 
tastes like, it's just become a commonplace idea to me.  Even to the 
point that it's almost like a breathing excersize, imagining Mulder 
kissing me---like a calming technique I use as a way to control my 
anger when I'm mad at him, which can be an infuriating feeling. I guess 
it's just that wanting Mulder has become, for some odd reason, as 
elemental to me as breathing, even when I want to get as far away from 
him as I can. My passion for him---it's just a part of me. A big part. 
I don't know why. I can't even begin to explain it to myself. 

But back to the story here.  

So anyway, I was perfectly content just to be standing there with 
Mulder, taking in his presence and sipping the coffee he bought me---
which was pretty good by the way---when the conversation stilled and 
shifted, and he tilted my chin to his eyes.  I'm assuming it was to see 
if I was really "Ok" with the case, with him, or whether I was still 
mad and just bullshitting him into thinking I wasn't mad, but whatever-
-I don't care. All I know is that at that moment there were just so 
many things I suddenly wanted to tell him, so many things that I 
could've said, but of course, I was still mad.  I was still annoyed.  
And I was also in the middle of an airport for christ-sakes, so I 
wasn't about to make a scene. 

In the end I opted for a stupid, retarded, simple "Yeah we're ok," but 
he seemed to like that answer and so I let it go.  I also started to 
notice that Agent Fowley had been staring at us on and off while she 
stood examining the ingredients of Bubble Yum bubble gum like they were 
the secrets of life.  

Oh yeah, REAL subtle Diana.  

Well, whatever she had been doing, Her unwanted presence managed to 
deftly break our contact. (much to her UTTER dismay I'm SURE...)And 
thus, our moment was swiftly shattered. 

That's when Mulder made some dumb excuse about checking the boarding 
passes and left us there together. Alone.  Damn him.  Uncomfortable, I 
smiled at her and she smiled at me.  Neither one of us was being 
sincere.  

Oh how I would've loved to have just thrown her head first into the 
newsstand right then and there.  It would've solved EVERYTHING. It 
would've gotten rid of HER.  

Ok, I'm sorry.  That's immature of me...

Even though it WOULD have solved...

Well now I'm just becoming distracted again.  Sorry. Where was I?  Oh 
yeah.  

So Diana and I "made nice" for about 3 minutes and then we all made our 
way onto the plane. 

Well, OF COURSE, Mulder walks ahead of me---AGAIN---and is SOO deep in 
conversation with Diana that he loses me amidst the throng of 
passengers.  But then, why did that surprise me?  I knew our relative 
peace wouldn't last.  It never does.  

So because of Mulder's inconsideration, I had to find my seat. Amongst 
a ludicrous number of people... ALONE.  NOT fun.  

Oh, and by the way---did I mention that there were so many people 
everywhere, it was horrendous?  Well it was. It was ridiculous. It 
looked like thanksgiving weekend during World War III, with a zillion 
people travelling to fight each other over the last turkey in 
existence.  And yes, they WERE really that rude.  As a matter of fact, 
just the idiots I was standing behind alone, yelling to each other 
about the airplane food, made me want to get out my gun and scream 
"everyone shut UP! I'm with the FBI and I can take people down!!"

But then, that would have been an illegal thing to do, and so that 
option was out.  It also would have defeated the purpose of me finding 
peace and quiet---two things I needed most desperately, but of course I 
wouldn't be getting EITHER of THOSE any time soon. Mulder was nowhere 
in sight and neither was Diana and my blood was near boiling and 
well...>>>>>

          ~^~^~^~^~^~~^~^~^~^~^~^~
SCULLY:
FLASHBACK
Around 8 am
flight 742, 
Nonstop to Kansas

Where is Mulder goddamn it?  Just where the FUCK is he?  Why is it I 
can't turn my back on him for a second?  Just one fucking second?  WHY?  
GOD, I'm going to KILL him!!

"Excuse me," someone calls from behind, and I try to move sideways for 
them, to let them pass, but I only manage to succeed in wedging my 
carry-on between two nearby seats.

Oh shit. 

"Wonderful," I mutter irritated, and the man behind me begins to tap 
his foot impatiently, like oh yeah, I'm just getting a BIG kick out of 
fighting the seat for my luggage, and so my temper starts to rise.  He 
taps his foot even louder and I wish to god that I could turn around 
and pummel the guy. Yeah Mister, Sure.  I do this every time I get on 
an airplane--- just to piss other people off.  Christ. 

Finally, I manage to pry it free with a low grunt, and Mr. asshole 
behind me mutters something like "Well it's about time," and I SWEAR, I 
am SO ready to just get out my gun and start firing at will.  

Where the FUCK is Mulder? 

Unable to figure out where the hell I'm supposed to be, I look down at 
my boarding pass and let out a miserable sigh.  Oh god, I don't believe 
this.  Coach it says.  COACH!!  I work for one of the most prominent 
federal agencies in the entire United States, and they won't even fork 
out the money for buisness class.  Oh for the love of god.

The cheap bastards.  

And then I hear it, an annoying alto voice from somewhere close by.  

"Oh just set it down there Fox, you don't have to carry it ALL over the 
plane." 

It's coming from across the aisle, and when I look up, I begin to wish 
that I hadn't. For Low and behold, there they are. My oh so wonderful 
partner and his oh so wonderful ex girlfriend slash federal agent are 
having an oh so wonderful conversation as he carries her oh so 
wonderful stuff while I'm stuck struggling with mine.  

Gee, thanx Mulder. No I'm fine---I have it---really.  So much for 
chivalry.

"Oh Good, 34 A and B.  I guess we can discuss the case then," I hear 
her from across the aisle, and I stop to watch him nod.  She then 
whispers and he's laughing at whatever it is she's just said.  It's a 
scene that just makes my skin crawl all over. 

Oh yeah, she's just great isn't she Mulder?  She's just the best.  Why 
don't you go fuss all over her while I attempt to find my seat on the 
wing of the fucking plane.  

Then he stops and looks around, as if suddenly aware of missing 
something.  

Gee, did you LOSE something Mulder?  Forget anything??  Did you perhaps 
misplace oh say...I dunno... your PARTNER?!?!

"Where'd Scully go?" he queries, as if reading my mind, and I suddenly 
get the urge to transmit a telepathic message that says "fuck you."  I 
watch as he then starts to crane his neck over people's heads to look 
for me. Yeah I'm sure it's great being 6 feet tall Mulder but 
Unfortunately, I can't keep tabs on YOU like that. 

 "I thought she was right behind us," he frowns and Diana shrugs.  

"So did I," she offers and that makes me want to laugh out loud.  

Oh yeah Diana, I'm SO sure that you were paying SO close attention to 
whether I was "right behind you".  I mean, you just SEEMED so 
enraptured with the idea of finding me and knowing where I was.  

I roll my eyes skyward.  

"I'm over here Mulder," I call dryly from across the aisle, struggling 
to get my bag under my seat, and he finally catches my eye, smiling in 
acknowledgement.  

"Hey!" he calls from the other row of seats, and sidesteps several 
people to get to me, eyeing my eminent struggle with my gray duffel.  

"Need any help?" he asks, and for the second time today, I feel like 
strangling him. 

No Mulder, why don't you go back to Ms "X-Queen" over there and try to 
see if you can get to second base before we hit Wichita?  

Oh god,  where did THAT come from?  Jesus, I really am immature about 
all this.

I need to stop it.    

"No," I grumble irritated.  "No, I'm fine."

He raises an eyebrow and nods an "ok" before moving to try and get back 
across the traffic to his seat.  His seat on the OTHER side of the 
aisle.  His seat next to HER... with HER!!  

Damn it, things just can't get any worse. They can't.  

"Hi. Excuse me, Miss?" 

The voice is from behind me, and I slowly turn to try and smile at 
whoever is attempting pleasantries on this hellhole of a plane.  At 
this point, even an ATTEMPT to be nice deserves some sort of 
acknowledgement in my book.

To my not so wild surprise, it's a man. Nicely dressed and also 
carrying a gray duffel similar to mine.    

He's of average height and build, nothing special, nothing arousing, 
and he's smiling widely at me, gesturing towards the window seat.  
"That one's mine," he says, and I gently move to the side to let him 
through.  

Whatever, I don't care. Just move so that I can get myself seated soon 
and fall asleep.

Finally, we sit and he extends a hand, as if I would want to get to 
know him or something, and I weakly take it.  He seems to be genuinely 
pleased by this and grins wider, as if to say "yeah, getting to know 
strangers on airplanes is a passion of mine.  Did I not mention that?"   
and I groan inwardly.  I am just not in the mood for this at all.  

The "fasten seatbelt sign" then starts to blink on and off and I soon 
find, to complete this picture of idiocy, that mine is stuck.  STUCK.  
My fucking seatbelt is stuck. Of course, how fitting.    

I groan and Mr. "Airplane friendly" next to me glances over and 
notices, frowning with a surprised, "So it's stuck huh?" and I just 
can't get over this.  I can't.  This just SOO figures.  

Yes, I silently hiss to myself.  Yes it IS stuck, and thank you for 
noticing Captain Obvious...  

Ok, so I guess maybe THAT was a little uncalled for...  I mean he IS 
just TRYING to be nice.   I can't just go off on everyone because I'm 
mad at Mulder.  None of this is HIS fault...

I try to smile and then manage a "Yeah, it is."

Captain Obvious smiles back and says "Well let me see it," as if I'm 
going to automatically let him, and then without warning or permission, 
he places his hands over mine to undo the knot that has it stuck.  

What the---

"See," he murmurs to me.  "Not so hard to fix."  He's still smiling. 
It's really unnerving. 

"So..." he pauses and flashes me what must be his "go get em'" smile.  
Oh god help me.  "What's a beautiful woman like you going to Kansas 
for?" 

I surpress a groan of distaste and sneak a glance over at Mulder to see 
if he notices this at all.  To see if he even cares.  To see if it 
bothers him that some indiscriminate man is hitting on me... With 
horrible pick up lines, nonetheless. 

But of course, Mulder is so deep in conversation with Diana, he is just 
apparently oblivious to all reality, including airplane crowdedness, 
tiny seats, and not at all to my surprise, me as well.  He seems 
perfectly content over there, across the aisle, gazing into HER eyes 
and sharing HER thoughts on the case... Oh god I hate her.  I hate her.  

No.  NOT this again.

Oh GOD DAMN IT!!  I. Will. NOT. Be. Jealous. Of.  Diana.   I will not. 
I have no reason to be.  

Slowly, I turn back to "Mr, Airline friendly" next to me and try to 
force a smile.  

"Oh, I'm sorry," he babbles, "That was way too forward of me. Let me 
introduce myself first.  My name's Dan."

He extends a hand to me and flashes another smile.  Oh great.  

"Dana Scully," I reply in a non-commital tone, and then shake back 
firmly.  

His hand lingers over mine for just a little longer than I feel is 
necessary, and I'm seriously starting to consider telling him that I 
pack heat.  That I am trained in hand to hand combat.  Or maybe I'll 
just knee him in the groin instead and be done with it.      

I force out another tiny amicable smile, turning my head to look out 
the window, and I hope to god that by some miniscule chance, he'll "get 
the hint" and leave me be.  But of course, because being Dana Scully 
means that I can't EVER win, It doesn't work.

I'm not a fool and I can sense him looking me over, raking his eyes 
over my body like I'm a pork chop or some other main dish, and I'm 
starting to wish that the plane would just catch on fire.  

So, you like what you see buddy? Cause I can arrange it so that you 
don't EVER see ANYTHING again.

"So, Dana," he says, interrupting the silence like I knew he would 
eventually.  "You never answered my question.  What's a pretty woman 
like yourself going to Kansas for?" 


The plane is starting to pull away from the gate.  6 more hours of 
this.  Oh Jesus Christ, someone let me blow my brains out.  This is SOO 
Mulder's fault. 
                     ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~~^^~^~^~ 

Coming soon to a theatre near you: MULDER'S SIDE OF THE STORY.  Send me 
feedback and tell me what you think.  Anxious to see what happens?  
What Mulder thinks of all this?  Send feedback.  <grin> Feedback gets 
you many stories and happy author!!!