From unreal@fly.cc.fer.hr Mon Dec 30 05:04:51 1996 The X-Files Christmas Special 'He is here' (C) 1996. Goran 'UnreaL' Krajnovic. All rights reserved. Copying and posting is allowed if no profit is made. Commercial distribution with permission only! Contact: unreal@fly.cc.fer.hr. Note: any possible X-Files trademarks (such as character names, silly plots, stereotypes etc) are used without permission. So sue me. Intro: Night. A forest covered with snow, lit by the Moon and the stars. Wind howls. We pan across the snow covered treetops as the camera goes down all the way to the floor. Slow background music rises dramatically in pitch and turns into a spooky, Jaws-type music. A bright, reddish light appears. The music reaches its climax. Suddenly, animal legs run across the screen, and we see the bottom of what appears to be a sled being pulled by the animals. Sudden fade to ... Fade in. Text on screen: Washington Airport. Control tower. Dec 24 1996. Evening. A room full of radars and computers, lots of lights blinking, typical computer sounds (bleep-whirrr-clunk-click). Several people sitting at the radars, with earphones and mikes, coordinating flights. One guy in the corner plays tetris. We zoom slowly to a guy, face lit with a spooky green light from the CRT, sitting at the computer, saying something like 'RE-234, descend to 12000 feet. Approach runway 6. Over.' This goes on for some time. The camera shows his computer screen, with a typical radar (green line rotates around the center of the screen, producing weird bleeps every time it displays a plane). All green dots are neatly labeled with things like TWA-400, KLM-211 etc. Suddenly, an unlabeled dot appears from the top right on the screen. The guy says 'This is Washington Tower calling unidentified craft at 34 degrees, come in. Over.' He gets no response. He tries several more times, but again no luck. He calls the boss, who is a gray-suit-n-sunglasses type. 'Sir, I've got an unidentified craft heading straight for Washington. It doesn't answer on any frequency." The boss reaches to the computer and looks, examining the dot. He types something and the computer displays something. The boss says 'it's too small for a jet. And going too fast for a small plane.' The boss reaches to the computer and turns it off. He whispers to the operator 'Now look. You never saw this. It was a malfunction. Go and have a coffee break. Don't be stupid, or else.' The guy gives him a weird look, but complies. He goes out, gets a cup of coffee and calls Mulder. Mulder is in his office (on Christmas Eve! what a loser) looking at some X-Files. He is examining a north Europe map, and makes a big circle around the northern part of Finland. The phone rings. 'Mulder here.' 'Hello. A friend gave me your number and said you are okay. I work at the Airport, in the Control Tower.' The guy goes on to tell him the whole story, while the X-Files theme plays in the background. Mulder asks where the craft was headed to. The guy says that it was going for Washington. The connection breaks suddenly. Mulder hangs up. Mulder calls Scully. Scully is at home, eating turkey with her family. She answers the call. 'Scully, it's Mulder. Something came up. It's urgent. I'll meet you in ten minutes.' 'Are you crazy??? It's Christmas Eve! What can possibly be so important?' 'It's *HIM*. Right here, in Washington. And I know the address.' 'You're out of your mind. Why aren't you at home?' 'I was working on a case. I'll pick you up.' Scully tries to protest, but Mulder hangs up. Next scene: Mulder and Scully, driving in a car. Mulder tells her about the call. Scully doesn't believe him, as usual. 'Okay, Scully. What is smaller than an aeroplane and flies around on Christmas Eve?' Scully gives him a look. 'What are you saying? That we are trying to catch Santa Claus????????' 'Exactly. I've been tracking him down for years, since I was a kid. Everyone said he didn't exist, but I never believed them. And now, he's been spotted approaching DC. And where is he going?' 'How should I know? I'm not one of his elves.' 'To the first name on the list. And that's Angie Aaron, age 6, Stanford Boulevard 56. He's doing his list of good kids and she's the first!' 'You're out of your mind. How do I write that into my report? I just say we were catching Santa? They'll kick you out of FBI in minutes!' Scully thinks about telling Mulder that he's an asshole, but she remembers that this is a TV show and you can't say that on TV. So she just stares through the window. Suddenly she sees a trail of bright light in the sky. The radio reception goes bad for a moment. Mulder also looks out and says 'see! What did I tell you?' They arrive at the house. Bright light is coming through a living room window. Otherwise the house seems quiet. Scully and Mulder take out their guns and sneak up to the front door. They slowly open the door and sneak into the room. The only light is the christmas tree, and we see a figure dressed in red piling boxes beneath the tree. Mulder jumps into the room and shouts 'freeze!'. The figure turns around, standing up,and it really is your classic white-beard-big-belly-red-clothes Santa. He looks surprised. 'Get your hands up where I can see them. Who are you?' says Mulder. 'What do you think? The Wicked Witch of the East? I'm Santa.' Mulder comes close to Santa and pulls his beard. It's real. 'So you really are *THE* Santa Claus. Nice to meet you.' 'The pleasure is not mutual. Security is on it's way, since I've got a deadline to catch. Now please leave.' Scully photographs Santa. She says 'Am I getting a present this year, Santa?' He says 'We'll see. You're under 'S'. That's a long way to go yet. Now get lost so I can get some work done.' 'Not so fast. Why are you hiding from the world?' 'What do you think? The mystery, the suspense, the believing. It's all part of the show. It's not fun when you know you're getting a present from a fat guy dressed in red, flying a sled. Now GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!' A bunch of guys crash in through the windows and doors. They all carry big guns, all are dressed in black, and they look like some Top-Secret-Government-Security-Service-Nobody-Knows-About-It-Not-Even-Us special forces. (TSGSSNKAINEU). They take Scully and Mulder, and they take the film from Scully's camera. A TSGSSNKAINEU chief (we know he's the chief - he wears sunglasses) comes to them and says the X-Files Security Speech (TM): 'Well, well. You really got in way over your heads this time. Unfortunately, we cannot allow you to talk about this to anyone. Even if someone believed you, we'd make sure that you two disappear from the face of the Earth. I hope you'll show that you have some sense left, and leave kindly and forget about all this.' Scully and Mulder are taken away and the TSGSSNKAINEU men drive them away from the scene. Mulder says 'I was so close this time. So close.' We hear jingle bells and a familiar laughter in the background. Fade out to end titles. Oh, shit, we forgot -- _ _ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ unreal@fly.cc.fer.hr / Y \/. |\/ __\/ -_)/ - \/ (_ http://fly.cc.fer.hr/~unreal/ \___/\|__/\_)\/\___/\_|_/\___/ Powered by Amiga. ---{ NE GASITE RADIO 101 }---